Daydreams and Nightmares
by lambentLodestar
Summary: It's a weird sensation to fall asleep in California one day and wake up in Ylisse at the same time. Apparently my name is now Shanzira, and I'm trying not to die here. Came pretty close already. I need to brush up on my knowledge of this game; it's been two years since it came out, and being in college and all, I've had my hands full, what with animating. Robin, don't let me die!
1. Drifting Off

**Author's notes: A new beginning. A new, much better beginning. Here begins a fic I'm actually putting effort into; with Recollection I just tried to get the chapters done. Now I can actually have some fun with this, it's a much better plot.**

**This is an extremely long prologue– over four thousand words. This is actually the longest thing I've posted on here yet. Don't be daunted by the size, though, it's a good read; I've already gotten good feedback for it. Enjoy!**

* * *

"Hey, Nin," I say, leaning back and swerving my wheeled chair around, "Does this look good to you?"

My slightly overweight roommate glances over the animation I've been working on. "Play it?"

I hit the play button. Now, I call her Nin, or Ninny, or Nineeyena, but that's not her real name, it's just I never got used to calling her anything but her old username when we first met on the internet. Natch, she's got the same old habit of always calling me Shanzira. Only fitting, right? Now imagine how funny it gets when she starts talking about my best friend Mike, who's actually a girl. "That looks smooth to me."

"Okay." I move my pen across my tablet to save my precious work. Or rather, homework. I'm at a school for animation and video game design, don't ask how lucky I was to get in, because my luck goes off the charts for a scale-of-one-to-ten question. Apparently my artwork is good enough to earn me a really shiny scholarship. And most of the time I'm in my artwork. Yeah, I spend a lot of time staring into the mirror, shut up, I'm vain. Oh look, there I go at it again, glancing to my mirror on the left wall.

There's me, the scrawny– oh okay, fine, I'm a "well-proportioned" (my mother's words) redhead with very curly hair. You should see it when I've had a shower and not combed it yet, it's the reason one of my friends nicknamed my "Merida", except it's a darker red than that. There's my glow-in-the-dark pale skin, my round and "adorable" brown eyes (The word used by an old friend, I swear!), and that coat I'm wearing. God, I love that coat. It's actually part of a cosplay, but I love it too much to ever shed it, except in the summertime. This coat single-handedly earned me the nickname of "tactician" around this college. It's the avatar's coat from Fire Emblem: Awakening, my favorite game ever. Uh-oh, I'd better shut up fast. It's been a little over two years since it came out, but I can still easily gush over it. Yeah, it was that good.

I twist around one-eighty degrees to my right (with the help of my spinny chair), to regard Nin. "So you wanna go eat dinner? It's almost seven." Yes, the college we're at actually offers food to its students. Holy hell, aren't we lucky? Yeah. We're lucky. My sister oughta be really jealous. It's not like she got into a video game design program, haha, no, she just codes.

Ninny turns around back to her desk as she replies: "Sure, just let me finish my physics work."

LOUD GROAN. "Nin, you're not even halfway through. The cows'll come home before you finish! At least take a break to eat." I probably shouldn't tempt her, though. Nin _inhales_ food (her words, not mine). I rub my face with one hand, briefly noting how sweaty it is from tablet work, and think. "You know what? Tell me what food you want, I'll bring it ba...ck... Or maybe not." I just had a wave of dizziness come over me, and I stumble to find a piece of wall to lean against, there it is. Okay, I oughta be good. "Dizzy. Oh. Oh wow. I... I must be hungrier than I thought." Somehow, that doesn't seem right. I notice my heart's palpitating, which means my anxiety's acting up. Shit. Why am I so dizzy? Low blood pressure? Heart attack? Aneurism? Or maybe I'm just hungry? Please just let it be hunger and LBP. I yawn. Wait. _I yawned?_

Somehow, I'm extremely sleepy. That doesn't make any sense whatsoever, given that my heart's pumping faster than it would if I were back in high school P.E., running the mile. I glance at Nin's digital clock, noting that it's 6:59, and make for my bed.

"Shanzira?" She turns her chair away from her physics work, then stands, alarmed, upon seeing me stumbling to my covers. "Shanzira, why are you going to bed, I thought you were hungry? It's too early for sleep–"

There's a staggered thump as I hit the carpeted floor, but I'm too asleep to hear it.

* * *

Wow, it's windy out. Sweetness, I love the wind. Crazy, crazy wind, now where's my coat? Oh yes, I'm still wearing it. All I need to do is stand up, hold out my arms, and revel in this beautiful breeze and flowy coat. All I need now is a cape. Haha, that wouldn't go with this outfit at all. Wait a minute. I thought I was in my dorm. I snap open my eyes and jump to my feet. You know that anime-ish jump where a person lying down just curls their legs into their torso, then uses them to spring onto their feet? I have that mastered. Being short helps.

I'm not in my dorm, what the hell? I'm in a grassy field. Talk about amber waves of grain, this... Wow, this is beautiful. Where _am_ I? You don't see this in the city. So I'm not in California anymore, which means I can't count on the wind to serve as a compass. Okay. Where's the sun at? Rising just a little over the horizon. Perfect. Left hand points east, right points west, and I'm facing north. Let's try going north.

I'm an internetter and an animator-in-training, a cosplayer and video gamer. I just woke up in a grassy field somewhere, I have no clue where, but I know which way is north. I am twenty years of age, I have suffered and recovered from depression, and I see myself as a badass and yet simultaneously a woman still trying to carve out her path in life. I like to think of myself as a good strategist, but I actually suck at it, and my true skills lie in art and writing and all that is creative.

Do I have music on me? Pockets, pockets, good, I have my iPod and some earbuds. I plug 'em in and start playing. Put entire music library on shuffle. Funny how what first plays is the theme for the future in Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers. That's not helping my anxiety. Do I have my iPhone? Yes, I do! "Where am I, Siri?"

...

The GPS isn't working? Fuck. What the hell? This theme is getting even more fitting. Anxiety, stop it. Heart, slow down. Oh, god. I have no clue where I am. Keep walking. Keep walking. Don't stop.

There's a town in the distance. Looks pretty small. Okay, I can get my bearings properly there. I begin to speedwalk. I've never been on my own outside of my hometown. I'm twenty, and yet still so inexperienced. Well, I guess that's what happens when you have depression for eighteen years, you never get out anywhere.

How is it that the clock on my iPhone works, and not the GPS? I pull out my iPhone again and look at the lock screen. 7:28 AM. AM? But it was almost seven PM, and I collapsed sleepily... I don't know. Augh. This business is making my head hurt. The sun might be out and it might be morning, but the beauty of this scene doesn't fit what's going through my mind in the slightest. Keep walking, just keep putting one foot in front of the other. Okay, this music is getting depressing. I stop my iPod and pull out my earbuds. Back in the pockets you go. (When I had this coat made– yeah, I didn't make it, hush– I had it made with a shitload of pockets, because the pants I had to go with the cosplay had none.)

I pause about thirty yards or so away from the town and stare. It's like a ye-olde-farm-town. What the hell? Okay, I walk in, noting that my feet aren't hurting yet. Narrow streets; shoddy, brick-and mud-houses, and all the people are wearing the clothes of medieval-ages peasants. I feel quite out of place. It's a good thing these are the boots I can actually hike in. I don't have my music in, but there's a song that keeps playing in my head, "Even in Death" from Homestuck. Why is it that the depressing themes are the ones coming to mind? Ugh. I thought I was rid of this two years ago.

"Excuse me," I blurt to a passing peasant (for lack of a better word). "Where is this?"

He looks at me like I'm stupid. Ugh, this is why I hate asking questions. "This is Southtown, missy. The inns are over thataways if you need one." He points his thumb a little ways to my left, then goes about his business again.

That was extremely helpful. The name of this place is "Southtown." COULD HE HAVE BEEN ANY MORE VAGUE?! Argh! I shake my head and keep walking. I don't have any money– I never keep any on me– so I doubt I could get me a room at an inn. So it looks like I'm a wandering vagabond. Wayward? Heh. Homestuck. Just don't make me a mayor. Besides, I liked the Parcel Mistress better.

Actually, the buildings are improving in terms of quality and material as I head further in. They're going from mud bricks to stone walls. They even look kinda nice. I always did have a soft spot for the rustic look when it came to architecture. Hell, I think I even see a little canal... I guess this "town" is richer than I thought it was. It's much prettier on the inside, if nothing else. I spend a few hours wandering around, seeing the sights, and nicking unattended fruit in the market stalls whenever I get hungry. Apples aren't really my favorite, but they'll tide me over.

* * *

Well after the sun's hit its zenith, I have a seat on the brick edge of the canal, and start digging through my pockets. Their contents haven't changed: There's my driver's license, my iPod and iPhone, chapstick, and my 3DS. Never go anywhere without entertainment, I say.

Damn. I just realized that I've been caught without my sketchbook. As an artist, I'm actually a little embarrassed. I make it a point to never leave home without art materials, just in case my muse hits me with something while I'm out. This actually gets on my parents' nerves whenever I go eat dinner with them (yeah, their house is nearby my college, I moved out for a sense of independence).

I hear a scream a little ways away and I bolt upright, alert. Anxiety, stop it. There's a woman being harassed by this ugly, thickset guy with an axe, on the other side of the canal. There's even a bridge nearby.

Wait a minute. This is finally ringing some bells. I blink, then raise a hand and count the people nearby. The townspeople have all vacated the area, or are in the process of doing so, and there are armed men rifling through whatever's left behind.

And one of them is coming for me. Shit. What do I have that I can weaponize? ... If I used my earbud cord, I could strangle this guy, but that would take some doing, and I don't want to kill, I want to scare him away. I adjust my posture– I stand with my chest puffed up and head tilted forward, and take a step back. Glance to the sides. There's an armory just down the street, behind me and on my left, I notice.

Bolt. Go for the armory. Axeman follows. Bust open door, and it's empty, looks like the proprietor ran off like everyone else. Grab a lance off the wall. Twist around and twirl it. It's heavy, but it'll do. This guy doesn't have to know that I'm a noodle.

"Why don'tcha put down that twig and come with me, pretty?" Oh, shit. He's not backing down, he's grinning in the most _disgusting_ way and brandishing his axe, meaning to scare me. I do my best not to let him know that it's working. Okay, what's nearby me? I back into the armory's counter, a front desk of sorts, and I grab whatever I can off of it and hurl it at this guy.

Did I mention my aim sucks? I can't throw to save my life. Mr. Brigand just ducks beneath it– I overshot, shush– and rushes at me. I move to the side and hold out the lance I just pilfered, then I take it a step further and try to swipe at the guy.

I hit him; blood is drawn. It's not bad, though, and I wasn't putting in much effort. He snarls, looks at me again, and takes a swipe with his axe. "You'll pay for that!" I step back to dodge. Really, is that the best line he could come up with? I twist around and run out of the armory the way I came. I go back to the little square I'd been sitting serenely in just a few minutes ago.

What a mess. Fighting is what's going on. Can't let myself get distracted, there's still this guy to worry about. I turn around and climb up on some crates, just around the corner I know this guy's about to run by. "Welp, there's a first time for everything," I mutter. "First life taken... in about a minute." The brigand runs out after me, and I jump him, impaling him through the back. Blood spurts and flows onto the stone pavement as I pull the lance out (with some difficulty). Oh, god. This is... disgusting. And my anxiety's going nuts. I could vomit. Don't vomit. Look up. More brigands, presently being attacked by four people. Okay. I think the four people could use some help, because if they die, so do I. And the numbers they're facing really suck.

I say people and describe these guys really vaguely even though I have a sinking suspicion I know who they are. I run out to join them, using my lance to pole-vault over some corpses, but I stop about ten yards away from the altercation. Do I really want to do this? I mean, I could get killed. My motivation to live hasn't wavered in two years, and I should like to keep that streak. Yet I know that if I don't take this chance, I'll regret it for the rest of my life.

I hope this isn't Lunatic mode.

Sburban Jungle, I think, charging in with my lance raised. Even as the name pops up, the song itself plays in my head. Let's go. I skewer a swordsman who was busy going after a girl with a staff, and then I jump away to make sure nobody goes after me while I'm similarly distracted. Lucky shot, I swear. I turn around to find an axeman coming after me, and it strikes me that my defensive capabilities suck. Like, they really do suck. This guy could probably kill me in one hit. My eyes widen notably, Mr. Brigand # 2 sees this, and he raises his axe high, charging, and–

And then he stumbles, a woman with a sword just hit him in the gut with the aforementioned blade. Blood's on the ground beneath him, but he's not dead yet. I point my lance and charge in to finish him.

"Wait!" Cries the woman, and she's a little late.

The axeman raises his arm and MY CHEST! Augh! There's an axe in my chest! Oh god oh god ohgodohgodohgodohgod back away. I back away, the axe slips out of the wound and my blood joins that of the man I just impaled on the ground. I don't even have the strength to pull my lance out. Aw, shit. I just had to fuck this up, didn't I?

A sharp, loud whistle distracts me briefly. "Lissa!" That's the woman's shout. "Heal this woman!" I see, out of the corner of my eye, the woman pointing at someone behind me, then at me. Actually, that woman's wearing the same coat as me.

Please don't make me admit it, please. This is bullshit. This is... Ouch, ouch, this hurts. Augh! Hi, ground! Why do you have to greet me so painfully?! A hand grabs my shoulder and turns me over onto my back, exposing my belly and wound to the sky. I'm greeted by the sight of a blonde girl with crazy pigtails–

I shut my eyes. No, no, this can't be. It's a dream. A crazy dream. But why does the pain feel so real? Did someone just stab me to try and wake me up or something? But then I would have awoken...

I feel a terrible itching, but even as I feel it over my chest, the pain recedes. I open my eyes again and note that my wound– that great gaping gash left by that axe has mended, miraculously. What is this, Iron Man 3? Haha, making the wrong reference on purpose. I get up, wow that was a shock.

"Thank you," I wheeze out as I stand. Where's my lance? Ah, there. I walk over to the corpse I stuck it in and pull it out. Come on, I can move. I can totally move. Get out of this shocked state, get out of this anxiety thing, stop it. God damn it. I collapse to my knees. What is this, an anxiety attack? I thought I was done with these. Up. Get up! Get the hell up! Finally, I can move! Get up before someone kills you!

... But they're all dead?

How long was I out?

"Are you all right?" The woman sharing my coat asks. I look at her and note her silvery white hair, tied into two buns which dangle down in front. Huh. This is weird.

"Just an anxiety attack," I answer as though it's an everyday occurrence, even though I've never had one before. "I can move now, I'm fine. Did you guys finish them off while I was down?"

She nods and pats my shoulder. There's that mark on her hand. I'm careful not to say anything, good thing, too, because she's still talking. "Perhaps you should stay off the battlefield if you're prone to these. They could be the..." She stops as she realizes what she's doing. Yes, stop making my anxiety worse. "Perhaps you'd like to come with us?"

Time to play dumb. This is so much like a shitty self-insert fic, the only difference is that I'm not the tactician standing in front of me. "Who's "us"?" I ask.

Her mouth drifts sideways slightly in thought. Then, with a gentle hand, she grasps my right wrist and leads me to– oh god it's him. Why?

"Chrom, this woman helped us on the battlefield. She's not bad with a lance, but she did collapse in the middle of that fight..." Her tone is almost appraising. "Perhaps it would be a good idea to take her with us."

My heart, which had _just_ begun to slow down, picks up the pace again. God. Damn. It. Stupid anxiety.

Chrom, in all his blue-haired, scruffy-caped, bared-armed, badass glory looks me over. "What's your name?" That's a blunt tone. More so than I'd expected. It's been a while since I picked this game up, but I'd meant to play it earlier today. Well, good thing I still have my 3DS... Though after a while, it'll probably die on me. "Excuse me, ma'am," he says. I snap my attention back to him. "What's your name?"

My response is a thoughtless blurt. "Shanzira." That isn't even my real name, it's a username. Well, this _is_ a fantasy realm... Perhaps a fantastic name suits me here. And did he just call me "ma'am"?

"Well, Shanzira." He says the name exactly as I had imagined it two years ago when I first played the game. Oh, yes, that was the name I'd picked for it. I never choose my real name when I play video games. Anxiety, paranoia, etc. Chrom continues talking, so I pull my head out of my mind. "Would you mind telling us who you are?"

"Uhh." Truthfully, I'm caught off guard. I'm good at improvising, but improvising under pressure is exceedingly hard to do, and I never was... To hell with it. Just imagine you're roleplaying with your best friend. "I'm a wanderer of sorts. I admit I'm actually quite lost; I don't have the slightest clue where I am. Normally I'm not this much of a trouble magnet, but I suppose I can't be lucky all the time. I normally only draw and write, but in a pinch, I can twirl a lance around... As I've just demonstrated." And just like I would if I were roleplaying, I tailor what I'm saying to try and sell myself as a soldier. I hope it's working.

Behind me, Lissa pipes up. "She's not bad. She actually saved me from a myrmidon back there. And then I paid her back by healing her when she got hurt!"

I nod my head at Lissa. "She saved my life, I'd say. I thought I was done for. And I also owe my life to her." I point at the tactician whose name I assume is Robin. "If she hadn't stopped the guy who wounded me, I _would_ be dead, even with your helpful cleric around."

Chrom turns to Frederick, who's been quiet this whole time. "I think we should keep them."

Wow. Really?

Frederick gives this really annoyed sigh, and I can only assume Chrom's been annoying him by simply being trusting this whole time. "Recruiting two strangers in one day. Merely because they both aided us in combat is not cause enough to trust them. Milord, I cannot condone this."

He sounds like my father, no joke. I don't know whether I love Frederick or hate him. Chrom thinks for a second, then voices his rebuttal: "They both risked their lives. One of them even nearly lost hers. And we would repay this kindness with... suspicion and ungratefulness? They didn't have to join in and help, but they did when they could have run."

He's not bad at this, you know. Better than he was in the game. I guess he paid attention in school. Now that I think of it, shouldn't Frederick be at a disadvantage? I'm pretty sure he didn't receive such a lavish upbringing. I dunno, it's been a while since I read the support conversations.

With another sigh, Frederick concedes that point. "Very well. But surely our _friend_ Robin can provide an explanation for how she came here?" Wow, what a snarky asshole. The way he said "friend" was most definitely not sincere.

I can just _see_ Robin concealing a sigh. "I understand your skepticism, Sir Frederick, but I have shared all that I know. Please forgive me." She's surprisingly gentle. If I were in her shoes, I'd be pulling my hair out in frustration. I'm actually reminded of Emmeryn. I think things are a little different here than in the game... Wait, of course they are. I'm here, and I haven't read the script in forever. Of course my subconscious is going to screw it up.

"Frederick." The tone of Chrom's voice comes as a surprise to me– he almost sounds like a child, demanding a toy or something. "I've made my final decision. We could use Robin's talents. As for Shanzira, she helped us as well, and it would only be fair if we at least paid them back for their assistance."

"Wait, wait." I'm normally loathe to interrupt conversation, so this is quite out of character for me, but I need to clarify this. "Is that a job offer I'm hearing? Because that would be an excellent way to help me out, and Robin too. Give some direction to the lost lambs." Oh god, the fittingness of that statement hit me only after I said it. I'm the princess of accidental puns, taught by my father.

The prince nods, a smile on his face. "I couldn't have put it better myself. Are we not Shepherds?" It must be wonderful when someone else comes up with the most eloquent argument for you. And it works, because Frederick finally concedes that last argument, and there's a lull in the conversation until he starts talking business with Chrom. I know how this goes, so I don't need to pay attention.

I yawn. I hear my stomach gurgle. Welp. I pull out an apple that I stole earlier and eat it while the boys talk.

"So you're an artist?" Asks Lissa.

Nod, chew, swallow, speak. "Of sorts." Bite. Chew.

I can see her standing on her toes, bending over slightly as she looks into my eyes– wait, she's shorter than me? Oh, no, it's just her posture. "Can..." I immediately note the hesitation in her voice before she continues, "can you draw me?"

I look her dead in the eye. "You wouldn't believe how many people ask me that. And no, I can't. I don't have any materials on me right now. This is embarrassing to admit, but I sort of lost them." That's one way of putting it. I don't even know what the hell happened... I suddenly fell asleep in my dorm and woke up here? Now that I think of it, I'm probably going nuts. This is– I have to face it– too realistic to be a dream.

Lissa's then distracted, so I miss her reply. A peasant just ran up and shouted that we five ought to stay the night, and I know how this conversation is going to go. Frederick apologizes and says no, we must hurry back to Ylisstol, Lissa squawks in complaint and reminds him that it's nearly dark, Frederick says they'll camp and blah blah blah. I yawn again. Now that I check my heart rate, it seems my anxiety's calmed down. The four of them finish bantering, and we leave.

We've left the village behind by about an hour, and the sun's set, when I have another fit of yawns. I find myself overcome by the same sleepiness I felt about only twelve hours ago. "Guys, we should stop or something... I'm about to fall asle..."

There's a susurrus as I land face-down in the grass, snoozing by the time I hit it.

* * *

**Was it good? I hope this is better than my past work. But you're the judge of that, so please leave me a review and let me know! Thank you for reading!**


	2. Waking Up

**Author's notes: Took my time with this one, but I didn't do a lot of rewriting with it, I was pretty happy with the first draft. Again, it's lengthy.**

* * *

My back hurts, like my muscles are sore. How much was I tossing and turning last night? ... Judging by the fact that it's not windy and that I'm underneath warm covers, I'd say I'm in my dorm. Ugh. Normally, I'd lie awake in bed for some hours, but I feel as though I've gotten enough sleep. I sit up and rub my eyes.

"Holy crap, Shanz. You're finally waking up, I thought you might be in a coma." That's Nin, as usual. I can't really see her, I'm still rubbing the sleep from my eyes. Wow, the sandman really laid it on heavy, didn't he? I finally crack open my eyelids, and yawn. Augh, why'd I yawn? I hate opening my mouth in the mornings. There's Ninny, she's sitting in her chair, and it looks like she's playing some game, can't be bothered to identify it right now, on her computer. I glance at the clock, and it's right at seven AM.

"Well, aren't you bright-eyed and bushy-tailed," I yawn again. "I thought you normally liked to sleep in." Ninny has the craziest sleep schedule. I'm not even kidding– she goes to bed at like six in the morning and wakes up at three in the afternoon. She's not far from being nocturnal. Well, okay, I admit, the insane sleep schedule only happens on weekends or days when we don't have school. She gets up at normal times otherwise. Today's, what, Wednesday? So we have class today, yeah.

She rubs her eyes, but doesn't pause her game. "This is coming from the woman who just slept for twelve hours straight. I was worried about you, Shanzy, the norm is nine hours."

"You mean you weren't worried back when I was barely eking out seven hours of sleep? Damn, Nin. It takes oversleeping to get your attention?" This is said jokingly. Nin's got anxiety like I do, but unlike me, her parents never got her treated for it. I've actually had to share what resources I can to help her out. So, since she has anxiety, naturally she'd be worried the whole time.

Actually, my anxiety hadn't been that bad lately up until I collapsed last night. Last time I froze up like that was when I had indigestion so bad it was painful, and I was terrified for my appendix (this was months back). It always happens at night, when I'm asleep. It wakes me. I shudder at that thought.

She closes her game. "It's a sharp change..." Here a yawn interrupts her. "I have to get ready for class." There's a squeak of wheels as she stands, pushing her spinny chair back, then pushing it into the desk with her hands. I also get up; I'm pretty sure I have class, too, but only for a couple of hours. Then, I can go back to animating... Or I can just eat breakfast.

"I had the weirdest dream last night." I check my outfit and note that I'm still wearing the same clothes I dressed in yesterday and not my nightshirt. I shed my coat and dig around my clothes-pile for a clean pair of pants and a clean shirt. Life shirt, that suits me. Aaaand... Let's go with the brown pants with the big-ass pockets. "I had a dream that I was in Ylisse, of all places, and the prologue was going on." I yank my old shirt off over my head.

"Isn't that the part where you kill Chrom," she yawns as she prepares her coursework. She never completed the game, so I've had to– painstakingly– avoid spoilers around her.

I pull the Hero of Life shirt over my head, and while doing so wondering about my hairbrush. "No, it's when you first meet him. You kill him in the premonition." Where'd I put my pants? Oh, there they are. I'd better find my belt, too, these pants are way too big for me. The joys of being petite. "But like I said, I was in the prologue, helping Chrom and buddies dispatch some bandits. Well, actually, first I was in that town that crap was happening in, for like, quite a few hours, _then_ the whole shitfest happened. It was kinda fun, I got to steal food and stuff. But it was also terrifying, being on my own in the middle of nowhere. See, I didn't know where I was until I saw Chrom."

She chuckles. "You must have played that game a thousand times, and it took you several hours to figure out where you were?" I see that playful smirk on her face, and for the sake of her (admittedly frail) self-confidence, I refrain from my usual witty retort.

I fold my arms and exaggerate a frown. "I haven't played it in two years, and there were a million other places I could have been. The trick was to figure out which "middle of nowhere" I was in. And," I start to crescendo my speech, holding up one finger to make a point, "when a passerby told me I was in some place called _"Southtown",_ I wanted to _slap_ him because that's the most vague and generic name anyone could ever think up. You can't tell where the hell you are from that."

Ninny laughs, which was the whole point of that tirade. That's right, I exaggerated that for humorous effect. I try to make my life amusing in every way I can, it's a habit that just won't die. I've been called childish before, but what I see as being childish is running away from responsibility– something I've outgrown, thank you very much. The creative adult is simply the child that survived. Quote by Tumblr. I put my coat back on, having donned the rest of my outfit.

Nin vaguely gestures to the cluster-fudge of trinkets and knick-knacks atop the homework on my desk. "I'm pretty sure you have class soon, too, so you'd better get ready. I was afraid you'd sleep through it."

I yawn yet again, god damn I can't seem to stop. "With the way I'm yawning, I might just do so anyways. How the hell am I still so sleepy? Ah well, it'll probably pass." I exit to find some breakfast.

I suffer through several hours and two classes in this state of drowsiness, plainly wrong. I'm eating lunch and it's about noon when I stumble back into my dorm. I lean against the wall while I finish my egg roll, then I throw myself in bed. I'm amazed by how quickly I drift off.

* * *

It's chilly out. Like, really chilly. I open my eyes and regard darkness, then blink. Darkness? My vision adjusts, and I see a forest during the nighttime. I roll onto my back and behold a starry sky amid a clearing of branches. Damn, that's beautiful. Where's the big dipper? Orion's belt? I can't seem to find 'em. I sit up.

This dream again.

It's like it just kept going while I was awake. There's a dying fire and four other people curled– no, three; one of them isn't curled, but sitting up– around it. ... Yup, I do a headcount, and it's definitely Chrom, Robin, Lissa, and Frederick.

I missed the bear meat scene, gods damn it. My stomach growls. What the hell, I just had lunch, shut up.

"You're awake," I hear Chrom whisper over the soft crackles of the fading fire. "There's some leftover dinner if you're hungry." He points to a stick rising straight out of the ground with meat impaled on it; looks like dinner was cooked rotisserie style. I wrinkle my nose at first, but after a while I grab the stick and eat the meat right off of it. Lissa was right in the script, it tastes crappy, but when you're hungry (even if you have _no clue_ how, you just ate), you don't care.

After I eat half of it, I lower the stick. Yes, I'm full, I have a very small stomach. "Thank you for helping me," I stage-whisper at Chrom. There's a difference between a whisper and a stage-whisper; in one you're trying to be very quiet and you end up silencing your "S" sounds like you have a lisp; in the other you're still projecting the words, just with minimal voice. I took Drama in my freshman year of high school, it was a rewarding experience.

"If you paid attention while I argued with Frederick, you know what I'm about to say." I nod my head and try not to think about how rudely he phrased that, oops, too late. "You helped us. It's only fair that we help you." Now that was much more sweet. Wait, sweet? I meant polite, I swear. Damn it, there are Freudian slips going on in my HEAD now?! Besides, I thought I was going to forget about that. Two years is a long time to get over a crush.

I tilt my head slightly as I decide how to phrase my thoughts. (I always do this; talking to people is a skill I never actually had, I had to learn through a lot of trial and error.) "I still feel grateful to you. You might not realize it, but you're actually guiding me when before, I was lost." Chrom tilts his head as well, mirroring my gesture.

There's a silence for about a minute or two as neither of us can think of much to say. I, being the chatterbox, break said silence with something more disturbing: "Is it just me, or is it unnaturally quiet?"

He starts, eyes widened, and leaps to his feet. The noisy shuffle wakes Lissa, who stirs and stands, moaning in annoyance from having been disturbed. "Is something wrong, big brother?"

"Nii-san" is my first thought whenever anyone says "big brother". God damn it, I've been watching too much anime. People around here keep recommending shows to me, and I watch them while animating (that's pretty ironic when I think about it, actually).

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you, but..." Oh, right. People are talking. I hesitate, wondering whether I should prompt them to do stuff. Oh, hell. Impatience gets the better of me.

"Perhaps you ought to take a look around, just in case." Betraying my own statement, I lie back down. I know what's going to happen. I think. I need to find an opportunity to crack open my 3DS and replay this game, it's high time I reviewed the script. On the other hand, that might be a double-edged sword... Welp, there's me, worrying about everything.

Lissa runs up to her brother and clings to his bare arm. "I'm going with you! No matter what, okay? No protesting!" Now where was that line from? It must be really obscure if I can't remember it. But I know it's a line from _something_ I read, I just can't figure out what.

Chrom lightly pats her head. "All right, Lissa. But stay close. I want to make sure nothing happens to you." Awww. I wish my siblings actually gave a crap for me. The two of them walk off into the woods, leaving me with an asleep Robin and Frederick.

Shanzira, this is no time for pranks, don't even think about it. You _know_ what's about to happen, or at least, you think so.

Even so, the thought of messing with Frederick is tempting... No, no. That's a sure way to get kicked out. I could have plenty of opportunities later. But will I? Huh. This is hard. Do I play it safe, or do I live life to the fullest?

... I always hated everyone who said "YOLO". You only live TWICE, dimwits! I sit up but make no further movement. Despite the short time I've been awake, drowsiness has already fled from my body, probably due to anticipation.

The ground heaves and quivers as though the planet itself is shivering, and I see a rip in the earth vomit up a wall of flame and lava. Beside me, I hear the sounds of armor clinking and fabric rustling as Frederick and Robin hurriedly scramble to their feet. I turn around just in time to see Frederick fall flat on his face.

I wish I'd filmed that. That was priceless. Actually, it's very amusing in general to watch two people scramble about frantically while I serenely sit here and COUGH COUGH oh gods that's smoke it smells terrible and I'm going to have breathing issues. Damn. I forgot, lava means fire and fire means smoke. Shit. I stand up just as the ground ceases its angry trembling.

"What are you grinning about?!" Robin squawks at me. I'm grinning? Fuck. Well, better justify it.

"Well, you two are stumbling around and pratfalling and I'm just calmly sitting here, not falling over. Well, okay, standing. Do you even know how funny that–" DAMN IT, SMOKE! I'm interrupted by a fit of coughs. Did I inherit my mother's lung problems or something? Ugh. I thought bronchitis wasn't really contagious.

Ain't nobody got time for that!

Okay, bad old internet memes aside, seriously, we got shit to do. "Chrom and Lissa went that way." Point. "Let's go." Where's my lance? Aw, shit. I twist around, casting my eyes everywhere looking for it. Can't get into a fight without a weapon at the ready. Where is where is where is– Oh, thank you, Frederick.

"Milady seems to be wondering about her arms. You dropped this when you fell asleep." How kind of him to explain. Now can I have my lance back, or are you going to hold it out of my reach forever? Augh, I wish I could tell him we're about to get into a fight. "However, I would withhold this until further notice, which is to say–"

"Until Chrom says so," I interject. This is pissing me off. "That's pretty low, stealing my only weapon off me while I'm asleep? Aw, you know what, forget it. Let's get going."

"Yes, let's." That was Robin, and I think she also just yawned. "There's no point in standing here arguing." And on a rather low note, we run in the direction I'd pointed about a minute ago.

My god, I am really out of shape. I haven't gotten regular exercise since I was in high school P.E., and that was what, four years ago? Shit. Frederick outpacing me I can understand, he's on a goddamn horse, but _Robin's_ way ahead of me and I'm already out of breath. I wasn't made to breathe smokey air, fuck it! Damn, keep running! The last thing I want to do is fall behind and get ambushed. Pick up the pace, hurry!

"Milord! Milady! Are you all right?" I hear Frederick shouting ahead of me. Almost there! Just a bit further!

I stop quickly beside Robin, bend over, and pant. My legs are already weak from just that little bit of running, and I'm having trouble holding my normally fantastic balance. But as long as nothing disturbs me, I should be oka–

Cough, cough, cough! DAMN THIS SMOKE! Almost dramatically, my side meets the ground as my balance is thrown off entirely by the convulsions of my lungs. I'm already exhausted enough, and now my practically nonexistent core muscles have to tire themselves out as well! Ugh... Okay, just lie here and recover. I should be okay soon. Should be.

Robin's voice comes not as a comfort, but as an alarm. "Shanzira, get up! Enemy incoming, four of them!" Shit! With difficulty, I stand, but I'm trembling and weak. One blow would down me in my current state, and I can't say I have the agility right now to dodge much.

"Robin... If they get in two hits on me, I'm dead," I gasp between breaths. "One to knock me down, one to finish me. Bear this in mind." I cough again, but only once. I hope she can handle the handicap.

She nods, and her tone adopts the urgency of a tactician giving orders. "Frederick, give her her lance back, we need every able fighter we have. Lissa, stay close to Shanzira and heal her if necessary, and Shanzira, if you can, keep Lissa safe. Frederick, Chrom, you two will fight at the fore, since your defenses can take abuse much better than the rest of us. As for me, I will strike from behind you two."

I cough. "That keeps our defenses really close together. Shouldn't–" And then pain slices through my back, knocking me onto my chest. I manage to stop myself from screaming in pain, but only barely. I shut my eyes tight and wince as Lissa pulls out whatever lodged itself in my back. I croak out a single word: "One." I don't even have the energy to scratch at my back as the still–foreign itch of wounds being healed torments me. Even though my heart's pounding hard, what with adrenaline and anxiety and everything, I can't summon the energy to stand again. I'm too tired from running. Damn it. Wait just a second, Robin, I'll get up in a minute.

Her orders change, but I hear a strange note in her voice. "Frederick, in the center, Chrom, on the left, I'll be on the right. Lissa, stay close to Frederick." I guess she decided it was a baaaad idea to give me protection detail. Good. At least our defenses ought to be a bit stouter. I feel safer, if only slightly.

I spend the next minute or so trying to ignore the grunts, squeaks, and hissing of battle with Risen. They make an eerie sound; the game, I think, couldn't really do them justice. It's really high-pitched, like the E string on a violin or nails on a chalkboard. It sends shivers down my spine. In time, however, I feel strong enough to stand, thus I do so.

"What'd I miss?" I grumble. Robin's pushed the line of defense forward a little bit, seemingly abandoning me. What the hell? So nobody was close enough to hear me talk. Wonderful. I raise my lance, take a few deep breaths, and charge in by Robin's side, impaling a sword-wielding Risen which was distracted by her.

She looks quite shocked to see me up. "Wha– How did– I thought– I thought that strike killed you! Not that I'm complaining, but don't scare me like that next time!" She flips a few pages in her tome and sends a Thunder spell out, intending to hit a Risen in the distance but completely missing and instead lighting a tree on fire.

"You owe me, then, not just for the favor I did you just now, but for leaving me for dead. Didn't you see Lissa heal me? And you just made the forest fire worse, by the way." Wow, her focus is crap right now. What's with her inability to pay attention? I thought she was better at this.

She jumps, yelps, and hops to actually hitting the enemy and not worsening our issues. I scoff, because it would probably be a better idea if I paired up with someone else, since I'm apparently such a distraction. On light toe-tips, I prance over to Chrom, lance in both hands behind my back. "Mind if I fight with you, Boss? You seem impossible to distract."

He nods his head at me slightly and slices an axe-Risen... Axeman? Or was axe-Risen right?– clean in half horizontally. "Go ahead, I feel safer with an ally at my side." I smile brightly. Good, I love encouragement. But if I just let him take the reins, he'll do all the work and I'll get no experience. On the other hand, I can't really do much to help. Hm. Or perhaps I could pair up with Frederick and use him as a stat booster while I mow every do–

This is not the game, Shanz, stop thinking like it. This is reality.

... Okay, that's hard to admit to myself and I can't believe I just did. This is real. I'm not dreaming. I'm actually living in two worlds at once.

Freaky.

"Are you going to pay attention or not?!" Chrom shouts at me, shaking me out of my reverie. I stand petrified, a little shaken from being yelled at, especially by him. "You nearly just died for the second time tonight! Let's hope there's no third time, all right?"

I raise a hand in a sloppy yet stiff salute, quite reasonably intimidated. "U-understood, sir!" Then I lower my hand and bring it back to the haft of this crappy bronze lance, and drive it into the nearest Risen... Which apparently isn't dead yet.

Fucker. My lance is stuck, and this guy is glaring right at me. Okay, I'm scared now. Help? "HELP!" I take a sword to the right side, and I wince and fall as pain burns quite a wide area in my side like wildfire. More of my own blood spills onto the ground, and I scream in pain because I just landed on my goddamn wound. I really hope my appendix didn't get hit– that's been a fear of mine for years, of my appendix bursting on me. I can just barely see a blue blur– which I'm pretty sure is Chrom– vertically bifurcate the offending Risen, and there's a beige-ish-yellow blur which clarifies into the image of Lissa, with her staff at the ready.

How long have I been asleep? I'm probably going to wake from my nap soon. Oh, shit, this would be a bad time to fall asleep, wouldn't it? Stay awake, Shanz. Stay awake. Oh gods, there's that godawful NASTY itch of wounds being healed, I mustn't scratch it, _aaaaaagggghhhhh–_ oh good it's gone. Roll your pathetic torso over and get on your feet, Shanz. I stand. "Thank you, Lissa. I owe you my life two times now." This comes out as a rough groan.

She smiles at me, obviously happy I'm okay. "Don't let them hit you again, okay?"

... That was surprisingly blunt. I'd normally expect that kind of rudeness out of Chrom. Well, surprise, surprise.

This interlude is interrupted by Robin's command voice, which is a lower pitch from her normal voice. "We have them almost routed! All units, in a line! Lissa, Virion, stand behind the line of defense and do your jobs! Frederick, Chrom, Sully, Shanzira, with me and CHAAARGE!"

Shit, shit, shit I only have so much time to move and "AAAGGGHHHH I'M RUNNING AND I'M PRETTY SURE I'M GOING TO GET KILLED! GOD HELP ME I'M ABOUT TO DIE! DIE, MONSTER!" (I just got one in the neck, an actual kill shot.) "TAKE THAT!" (Lance to the knee; it's on the ground and Frederick just finished it by impaling it, ouch.) "AND THAT!" (And that blow was in the crotch... Chrom just winced at he decapitated the poor sucker.) "AND A SPECIAL SIDE OF THIS!" (Talk about flashy moves; that was me twirling around and whacking a Risen over the head with the haft of the lance. Natch, it's not dead or even downed, but at least it was stunned momentarily so Chrom could finish it.) "EAT SHIT, SUCKERS!"

CLANG. Welp, my lance just clashed against an axe. Fuck. Uh, a little help here? Unless I can turn it around? Jump back, it trips at the sudden lack of resistance, and I stab it in the neck. Finished! I must've gained like two levels in this chapter STOP IT SHANZIRA. And I think that's the "Chief" over there, because he's the buffest-looking one. I poke Chrom and point at it.

He looks over, and his eyes widen in alarm. "Shanz, heads up! He's heading straight for us!"

Wait, he is? Oh... Fuck. He is. I'm the weakest. Shit. And that's a hand axe... Wait, is that the one who hit me at the beginning of the battle and knocked me down? ... I think it is! Well, time to die, you little sap! Let's show off my awesome hand-eye coordination, honed with sixteen years of art and video games, bitch!

With my lance, I deflect the thrown axe (it spins off to the side and sticks in the ground), then rush in at it and impale his foot. I leave my lance stuck there and I jump back, figuring someone else can finish it off. Robin's the one who does so, finishing it off with a good zap of Thunder. I step forward and pull my lance free of the now-unsullied earth.

And that is how I train underleveled units, ladies and gentlemen. I use them to finish off the enemies I weaken using the stronger units, and suddenly they're not so weak because they just gained like four levels in one chapter. My Donnel was always a badass because of this. I think. I'd have to crack open my 3DS to be sure.

"It would appear we have destroyed them all, milord," I hear Frederick say to Chrom. "Those which would have escaped were slain by this man." Turn around, Shanz, that's Lucina-I-mean-Marth. Marth is the name I meant to say. Yeah. Marth. I didn't speak any spoilers, hush. Is there any blood on my lance? ... No? I guess Risen don't leave any behind. Convenient. So I wonder who Marth's-I-mean-Lucina's mother will be in this. Probably Robin. Yeah. Shut up, it's really shippable. I can't stand Sumia with Chrom, anyways, there's nothing to them except pies. I mean, I like Sumia and all, I just wouldn't ever pair her with Chrom. Besides, she's adorable with Gaius. On the other hand, Olivia's not bad with Chrom, even if she is a little useless. Makes for a fucking OP Lucina. (Level ten, freshly recruited, and I could run off to the Ruins of Time and she would one-round a Griffon Rider. Yeah. That is the power of an Olivia-mothered Lucina.)

"You may call me Marth." Oh, it appears I missed some of the conversation because I was thinking so much. The sound of Lucina's-I-mean-Marth's voice brings me back to reality, and I start paying attention again, there's something I wanna do before Marth leaves.

Chrom's voice is thick with curiosity and admiration. "After the Hero-King? Well, you certainly fight like a hero. Where did you learn your way with the sword?" Oh, man, this. Haha, this is funny. There's so much delicious irony in this, I'm trying not to laugh. I mean, it was Chrom who taught Marth-I-mean-Lucina how to fight, and he doesn't seem to recognize the fighting style yet. I think Robin and I aren't the only ones who weren't paying attention the whole time!

"I'm not here to talk about me," she-I-mean-he growls with some irritation, trying to emotionally distance everyone present. "This world teeters on the brink of destruction. What you saw tonight was but a prelude. You have been warned." He turns on his heel to walk away, but he doesn't get far– I run up and hug him tightly around the shoulders. He freezes up in panic: "Get off, madam!"

"You still helped us, so you deserve a hug, okay?" I squeeze even harder. Yes, I really am this affectionate with my friends. Since we only get to see Marth sparingly before we recruit Lucina– which is two whole years from now– I figure it wouldn't hurt to embarrass him slightly. Besides, he'll forget this by then. People always do. And I normally tend to blend into the background Kellam-style, though not as skillfully. Lucina will definitely forget I even exist by then.

I'm just a self-insert, so to speak, after all. I might not even live to see that day.

Marth is released as I slump to the ground, my hour-long nap being up. I suppose it's back to animating for a few hours. Well, animating and research. I do have to play the game a bit more, now. It would be a bad idea not to.

* * *

**So what'd y'all think? Please leave a review. Next chapter will be released as soon as I finish writing it. Might take a while. It'll probably be done over the weekend, though, I'll have nothing else to do (other than revel in my glorious coat because it'll be finished by then, eeee.)**


	3. Friends, Old and New

**Author's notes: Okay, I'm a bit late, my apologies. I figured out a way to improve my writing just last night, so I went and scrapped the first draft of this chapter. I've realize that my dialogue is lacking in the extreme, so I've decided I'm going to write out the script for this first, then add the description to it. Having a process actually makes this ****_much_**** easier; I wrote the script and added the fluff just today while the first draft took days to start.**

**Oh, to the guest who said the tone sounds obnoxious: ****_Good._**** That means the personality is spot-on. Shanzira has a quality of obnoxiousness to her, which she can be slightly sensitive about. I'm actually going to make use of these flaw for plot points later on, haha. It will be ****_so much fun. _****Backstabbing!**

**This is mostly character development, really, but it covers stuff that has to happen. Shanz is really fond of most of the Shepherds.**

* * *

Animation is hard work.

Really, it's a wonder I never started collapsing like this earlier, given how often I stare into a computer screen every day. It's a miracle my eyesight's still good enough that I don't require glasses.

I don't really want to talk about it. My eyes burn. I need to close them for a while, except it hurts to so much as blink. Aaargh! I did it again! Maybe I should just play on my 3DS. Wait, that's the best fucking way to avoid eye strain, play on a _3DS_. _3D_. _HMMM_. Well, I never play with the 3D on, so it's okay anyways. And I do need to refresh myself on what happens in Awakening.

Perhaps this time I ought to go with the default avatar, Robin, since I'm obviously not her. Sigh. And I should also try to keep things in my game much the same as they are in my... dreams.

I don't know what to call the other world. It's real enough that I can't truly call it a dream, but I'm conscious there when I'm asleep here. It's confusing. Perhaps over there I'll call this world my dreams, and here I'll call that place my dreams. Okay, that makes sense. Now let's crack this baby open and see what I can do.

I believe my dreams just got past chapter one, so I should play to chapter two. At least, I think that's how it goes. What fight happened in chapter two again? I don't even know. This is how rusty I am. I mean, back when I first got into it or whenever, I could have listed each chapter and everything that happened in it, almost word for word, off the top of my head.

Two years is a long time to rust. It's quite pathetic. After this long of an interval, I remembered pretty much all of Bleach after not reading it for what, three years? Hell, I still haven't read it since I was a freshman in high school, so it's been five or so years. I could probably list all the characters in it if I had a reminder.

That actually reminds me of a part of the script for a Zelda game, "Unlike you, I've got a memory like a steel trap!" Heh, I bet nobody knows who says it or even which game it's in. It IS a pretty minor line, after all.

What time is it? Six, huh? I should eat dinner before I fall asleep again. Eat, play, then sleep. Hopefully I won't leave my 3DS on. iPhone rings. "Mm? Who's calling?" Dumb question, I just look at the phone. My best friend. "Oh." Answer. "Yello, what is it?" (She's used to me answering roughly.)

"Hey, you coming to D&D tonight?"

Oh, fuck. That's right, we have Dungeon and Dragons on Wednesday nights. Well, unfortunately, it looks like my sleep schedule's been seriously fucked with, so... "Don't think I'll be able to make it. You still playing Shio, or have you switched to a new character? We are starting a new campaign..."

"Nah, I have a new one," she answers conversationally. "Anyways, I have to finish getting ready. Bye."

"Bye-ya." She hangs up. "Welp..."

That was the shortest conversation she and I have had in a long time. Normally, we ramble on for forever about all sorts of things. I crack open my 3DS and check the roster on my endgame file– my first playthrough, which I never saved over– and find where her avatar is. (We recruited each other a long, long time ago.) Shio, level 13 Grandmaster. I'm a level 4 Grandmaster, only so low leveled due to second seal abuse. Haha, that's right... I kept reclassing everyone. Well, let's soft reset and start a new file.

This time, when I switch realms, I'm prepared.

* * *

I wake to find myself bent over... something. It's warm and slightly moving and I think it's a horse. I let out a yawn, and follow it up with some speech. "Good evening. Where am I?"

Frederick is the one who replies, and his voice is literally _two feet away from my ear_, making me jump. "Milady, it's morning, not evening. To answer your question, we are just outside Ylisstol. You refused to wake when we attempted to rouse you." I'm on his fucking horse! Oh gods, _DO NOT WANT!_

Okay, okay, stay calm. How do I get off without hurting myself? I think if I just push my hands against the horse, or that could be his legs– ugggghhhhhhh don't think about that– and then just casually slip off onto my feet, I oughta be good. Okay, let's try this. I slide off.

Then all this happens in a split second: I don't hit the ground, I panic and un-brace my legs, and then I finally land, causing me to crumple to the ground painfully. "Ow!" That horse is taller than I thought! Musing on what Frederick just said, I murmur: "Small wonder I had to work to stay awake..."

"Did you say something, milady?" Frederick startles me, and it takes work to not flip out upon nearly being caught over something.

I answer with my usual snarky flavor to disguise my lie. "Other than "ow"? No." I trot away from him, because gods he is annoyingly attractive. I don't know how, but just... his voice, his hair, his face, the fact that he's a knight– Oh gods, I'm rambling. Shut up, me.

"So, Shanzira, I wanted to ask you something, if that's all right?" THANK YOU ROBIN. You just rescued me from mental hell.

Thus, my reply comes delightedly. "Ask away. I love answering questions." Not to mention you saved me from my gutter of a mind. ... Shit, now I hate being an artist. I want to draw what's in my head. Hurry and ask me your question, Robin oh there it is.

"How did you come by your cloak? Forgive me, but I couldn't help but notice yours and mine share the same design." She's of course ginger about it, trying not to pry or be rude. But it's fine, she's far from rude.

Oh, wait. I have to give an answer, this is going to be hard. I need a second. "I... commissioned a friend to make it. Was expensive." Fifty-plus dollars for materials, yeah. The actual effort was free, thank gods. Fifty dollars is a lot to a high school student.

Disappointed, she murmurs in response, "Ah. So then, you don't know why they're the same..." I knew she was asking that, but I still need to mislead her.

Time for some bullshit. "They're hardly the same. Not to insult the skills of the woman who made mine, but yours is of much better quality." I don't fault her for trying, though– This cloak is more fantastic than I could have made it.

Robin frowns. "That's not what I meant, but... I suppose you're right." There's a lull in the conversation; neither of us can think of anything to say until she speaks up again. "You said something strange when I tried to wake you earlier."

"Oh?"

Hesitantly, she says, "you murmured something like "merde–tête"..."

"OH, GODS." I laugh raucously; that's hilarious! "Did I really?" I swore in my sleep? And more particularly, in French? I could've just mumbled "asshole" and been done with it, but no, I went for the more exotic French curse. I love my subconscious.

Trying to keep me serious, Robin nods, all business. "Yes. What's it mean?"

I cover my mouth, poorly hiding an amused smirk. "Perhaps I'd best not say." It IS pretty crude, after all– if my parents caught me saying that they'd probably swat me. Or perhaps not; I outgrew the swat about a decade ago. But I still fear their shouts.

I hear Virion's low, French accent. "Indeed, I did not expect so fair a maiden to keep so crude a tongue..." He almost sounds wounded, as though hurt that a lady should happen to know and use swears. Gods, I wanna see him with Sully even more. I do so love to hear that hurt groan.

The good tactician's eyes widen, and her torso perks up. "Now I'm even more curious! I must know."

Whenever someone says, "I must know," I'm always tempted to reply with "Get used to disappointment." BUT this is no time to be Westley, so I indulge her. "You really wanna know? It means–"

Virion belts at the top of his lungs, cutting me off. "PERHAPS 'TWOULD BE BEST IF YONDER LADY HAD HER DELICATE EARS SPARED?!"

I do believe he was trying to censor me. For this, I pull out a good snarl: "Gods, it would've been better directed at you, shithead." Seriously, Virion? Trying to censor me? Free speech, asshole! A lady can curse if she wants to fuckin' curse!

"Mm?" Robin's interested hum pulls me out of my tirade. "Is that what it means?"

Oh, yeah. Better answer her. "Shithead? Yep." I smile happily at my vices. "I know quite a few good swears." And I'm good at coming up with creative ones. Try calling someone a "bitch-waffle" sometime, that ought to produce a good laugh.

Virion droops in defeat, his eyebrows pushed up in that adorable manner they do whenever he's hurt and looking wimpy. "And alas, a nobleman's attempt to keep pure the ears of women has failed..." Oh, please. Stop making me want to swat you. You look good when you appear to be in pain. This is why I love to tease people, they react _beautifully_.

I hear Sully's low alto tone as her horse trots a little closer to us; apparently she overheard that. "Sweet," she says, impressed. "I wanna hear your repertoire sometime."

Smile and nod. "Can do. Mind if I walk with you?"

"Not at all." She has that wonderful, pleased smirk. "C'mon over here."

Trot, trot, trot. I'd reach my arm over and hug her, except she's on a horse and I'm on the ground, and that's some serious height difference. "Sully, my good dame, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship." Two tomboys in the Shepherds: This is their story. Oh, gods, this is going to be wonderful.

* * *

The city of Ylisstol is bright and sunny on the outside, but dark, shady, and cramped on the inside. The buildings are made of some kind of warm-colored, pale stone– think off-white or an extremely light yellow– and they're clustered close together, probably so the people have less trouble walking everywhere. Despite how claustrophobic it is, I quite like it: I've always loved being able to walk wherever I go. It's annoying to have to get into a car all the time.

The fact that there's a stench, however, isn't a change from home. It's just a different stench. Instead of car exhaust, I have to inhale the sweet smell of excrement. Eww. Well, it smells kind of like Louisiana, at least; it's a warmer, more humid stench as opposed to the somewhat salty smell of home.

To my disappointment, it appears that Robin was able to pick up the fact that Chrom's a prince before Lissa mentioned it. I was looking forward to that gag, too! She had the best reaction, in-game. But she IS right; Frederick is a dead giveaway. It's impossible to miss him calling them "milord" and "milady" all over the place, and complete that with the fact that is he GLARINGLY OBVIOUSLY A KNIGHT, and it's not hard to suss out.

Before Chrom took Robin and I to the palace, Sully grabbed Virion and went to drag him to the barracks. She asked me if I wanted to come along– probably so we could both team up on Virion and tease the crap out of him– but I wanted to meet Emmy, so I asked to stay with Chrom. Besides, he and Lissa are good company. Frederick... I'm on the fence about him. Let's sum up my feelings about him in one sentence: He's annoyingly attractive, despite (and possibly because of) his sternness. I really want to review his confession scene; I remember the ending was somewhat romantic, even though the buildup was nothing but comedy. Wait. What the hell, me, get your mind away from there. On to the next thing that happened. Like... Emmeryn!

The game didn't do her justice. She radiated calmness in it, right? She's practically a beacon of steel and virtue here. To someone unused to it– like me– it's inspiring; I've never felt so confident or peaceful. Gods, I feel so bad that she dies. It's hard to look at someone and know their death toll will ring in a few months' time– especially if they don't know it and you can't tell them. However, I imagine that if she knew, she would change nothing about the way she governs herself and Ylisse. Another part of her which bespeaks steel.

By the time Lissa, Frederick, Robin and I left Ylisstol, my feet were aching like hell. I have foot problems, you see. Flat feet and some badly curved bones. These boots I'm wearing are literally the only ones I'm comfortable hiking in for long periods of time, and even then it gets painful after a while. I can only imagine what kind of hell it would be if I didn't have these inserts.

So when we reach the barracks, I'm not sure what to pay more attention to: My screaming stomach, or my protesting feet. I keep shifting my balance, hoping for comfort, and I finally get to rest my legs but not my feet by standing in place while Lissa springs ahead and shows us into the foyer.

It's a nice-looking place, the game depicted it as being a bit messy and poor, but it's actually nice and well furnished. There's even a metal gate on the way in, and this whole patch of land for a garden and stuff. Of course, the garden isn't really kept up, so it's quite overgrown. It reminds me of my parents' front and back yards; they have a lot of overgrown rosemary.

Back to me and my poor feet, and Lissa clearing the trail ahead of us. She bounds forward– like I said earlier– and chirps at us proudly, "Here we are, the Shepherds' garrison! Make yourselves at home."

Now comes the most important decision of my life: Feet or stomach? ... BOTH! "Where's the pantry? I need food."

Lissa WAS about to introduce Robin and I to the assembled Shepherds– Sumia, Vaike, and Maribelle– but she pauses long enough to say, "Oh, it's down the hall, first door on the right."

Gods, yes, relief at last! "Sweetness!" Rejuvenated by the promise of a calm stomach, I dash down the corridor on my left and swing open the first doorknob to my right. Oh, look, Stahl's in there, with his little mess of a hairdo! "Hello!"

He looks at me, and apparently I've interrupted him snacking on some sourdough. "Mm? Oh, hello. Are you new?" He's so quiet, almost timid. Demure, actually, is a better word. I remember reading someplace that he's the girly guy to Sully's manly girl. I think that's right. He's actually pretty cute!

I nod, cheered up by how fucking _adorable_ he is. "Mm-hm. Name's Shanzira. Any good food in here? Can't do crap on an empty stomach." I glance around; oh gods, there's a ton of food, which should I eat first...?

He gestures to the dining table on my left. "There's some bread right there. You'd better eat it before I get hungry again!" And indeed, there it is, sitting pretty in a basket, dead center. And if I'm not mistaken, there's some apple pie next to it. Mmm.

"Will do," I promise, pulling up a chair, sitting down, and swiping some bread. "What's your name?" I stuff a big mouthful in. Gotta play dumb.

"It's Stahl. So what's your favorite?" He gestures to the whole pantry, not only talking about bread, but all food in general.

Pause. Think. I know what my favorite food is, but I wanna say it in an amusing way. Oh, I got it. I widen up my eyes, lighting them up anime style. Imitating Italy (for anyone who's watched Hetalia, I've only seen a few episodes), I raise a finger and shout, "paaaaaaaastaaaa!"

That gets a good chuckle out of Stahl. "Sorry, we don't have any of that!"

I chuckle as well, laughing off my "misfortune". "'Sok, bread works too." Footsteps, lightweight ones. Who's thi– Ah, Ricken. A fellow shortie. I think he and I will get along beautifully. I keep up my cheerfulness and blurt, "Oh, hello! I'm new."

He was originally casting his eyes about the kitchen, but they settled on me after I chirped that out. "Oh, well, welcome to the Shepherds. I'm Ricken." He smiles, but it's reluctant, like he expects me to talk down to him or something. ... Rough.

I should reassure him. I point to myself. "Shanzira. Or you can call me Shanz. Bread?" I offer some. Hey, shortie, you better each a good amount of wheat so you can grow big and tall! ... Heh heh. I will never out_grow_ height gags. ... Get it?

He seems slightly reassured by my friendly manner, and shakes his head. "No, I'm good. I heard there was pie..." He looks past me, to the dining table. "Oh, there it is! Looks like Sumia's cooking. Oh, she's a trainee," he adds hastily, as an explanation. "Like me." Well, that was a disappointed tone. Gods, kid, how much bullying do you think you endure?

"Well, save some for me, I haven't eaten since last night." This is all too painfully true. Find another subject to talk about. "Judging from your clothes, I'd say you're a mage, right?" That's a good topic! Magic. Yeah. Common interests.

Ricken's forgotten about the pie, and he's focused on just me, since we've just struck a common chord. "Yeah, I use wind magic. I'm pretty good at it, but I'm never allowed to fight..."

Let it never be said that I am not an opportunist. "Would you mind teaching me, then?" I reach for the pie on the table. "I've always had a fascination for magic, and wind is my favorite br–!" My hand finds nothing where the pie is. I look at the table. "What the–? Where's the pie?!" I twist around... to see Stahl digging into it, not having bothered to cut out a portion.

"Stahl!" Ricken groans. "Come on, we're hungry!"

Smirking evilly, Stahl ekes through muffling pie crust, "not as hungry as I am now! Sorry, Ricken!" And he dashes out, pie in hand.

I sigh, slouching a little. "Son of a bun..." I hold out the table's other decoration, the basket of bread. "Bread?"

He reaches for it and grabs a baguette. "I think I'll take it now. And I'd be happy to teach you. It'd be nice to have someone junior to me." My gods, someone has got to help this kid with his self-esteem. And it looks like it's going to be me.

But hey, I have a magic teacher now. "Sweetness." I pause for a bit, eating my bread, and I can't think of much to say. I'm bored of this conversation. "Welp, I'd better go play social butterfly. See ya!" With energy far more calm than before, I stand and exit the room, briskly walking the hall back into the foyer, where I see Lissa, Chrom, Sumia, and Vaike. Thanks to my short respite, my feet feel much better than before.

"What'd I miss?" Yes, that's appropriate for me to say.

Chrom looks over at me. "Ah, there you are. We'll be leaving for Regna Ferox in a week to request reinforcements to deal with the Risen. It's a voluntary mission, but I thought you should know." I'm flattered that he thought so much of me, but then again, that's Chrom for you– he doesn't neglect any of his soldiers (despite the fact that he can support with so few of them). This is why he's the hero.

I nod, as though saying, "yup, that's about right." What I actually say is, "'M coming, then."

The next surprised tone comes from Lissa, who tilts her head at this behavior. "Oh? That's a surprise. It'll be mostly walking, you know." The latter sentence sounds like a warning. I'm reminded of my mother, and of course, I do what I'm always scripted to do and insist on screwing myself over anyways.

"My gut says go with ya, so I'm going. Besides, never hurts to expand my comfort zone." Okay, that's acceptable bullshit. Chrom seems to believe it. They have no need to know that I have every intention of stalking this plot-line. "We leave in a week?" I clarify.

"That's right." That was Chrom. Okay, cool, I heard that right.

I nod in affirmation. "All right, then." I head off to set about settling in. This is going to be a busy week.

* * *

**Next chapter will be posted as soon as I finish it. I've already started the script for it, and it'll probably be done tomorrow, but I'll procrastinate on adding the description and fluff for a while. Gotta put some good distance between chapters (haha, torturing my readers). Next chapter deals with how Shanzira adjusts to her (altered) life.**


	4. The First Normal Day

**Author's notes: Sorry this took so long! I wrote the first part of the script and stopped in the middle of the conversation with Maribelle. She was being too nice. So naturally, I had to rewrite it. A lot of rewriting happened with the script this time, actually. Poor Nin only gets one line, she got at least three before I changed it.**

**Really long chapter. The script for this was long than I'd intended it to be, but there wasn't much I could do about that. OH WELL.**

**In other news, I have my coat at last! It's glorious! I LOVE IT!**

* * *

There's nothing I hate more than being interrupted in the middle of doing something. Really. It's the biggest pet peeve I have, I usually get unreasonably irascible whenever someone makes the grave error of doing this.

Next to that is my pet peeve of being nagged over schoolwork. This one's like an extremely sore wound that's worsened over years of my parents bothering me about it nonstop, and if you so much as go near it and I'll swipe at you with claws.

The only people who won't get harshly attacked when this happens are my close friends, for example, Nin. This is a wonderful example of what I will do to keep my friendships. Or it is hypocrisy, to expect people to thank me for something I do without question? Someone tell me these kindnesses aren't for naught.

I blow out a hell of a sigh to calm myself, and I say: "I'm sorry, Nin. I don't know why my sleep schedule's gone so crazy. The next time my classmates start hounding you, just tell them to see me."

Context: I've been slacking on the animation for a day or two, and since animation is such an intense, time-consuming thing, it's a lot of work I've missed. My classmates are naturally pissed because I just missed a deadline. Oh, and I've already been reminded that I'm in trouble if I miss the band gig at the open house this weekend.

Ninny throws her arms up in a gesture of surrender. "Okay. I don't need to start losing sleep as well. Just try and stay on top of your work, and I'll be fine, okay?" I really hate that ginger quality to her voice– probably because it's so like me. Both of us, when in the presence of someone obviously angry, get all terrified, we back down and do whatever we can to hold off the explosion.

Yeah, there's a lot of self-hate in my personality. When asked to write about "the antagonist in my life", I damn near wrote about myself.

I hold back another sigh, quite glad Ninny hasn't broken down or anything. "Will do." Resigning myself to the fact that I have to work, I cross the (tiny) dorm to my computer, sit at the chair, crack my knuckles, and get to work. As I do so, I quietly groan to myself: "Can't wait 'till Fanime..."

Fanime... Gods– God, what the hell? It took all of two days for the "gods" habit to rub off on me! But as I was saying, Fanime. It's a really big anime convention that happens around here and it is pretty much a wonderful carnival of awesome. It is like Christmas up in there, except it lasts four days. Oh, and did I mention? I have all four days off from school. BOOYEAH. I get excited just thinking about it. Oh, and this year, I have a good amount of money for it! Been doing commission work to get that money, and having a job is also helpful. I'm going to buy so much merch, and hopefully I'll have money left over– last five years, I didn't. (Whoops!) Well, for the fourth year, I burnt like a hundred bucks on a copy of the Knights of Iris artbook. (Wish it hadn't been so expensive, I did my best to haggle...) This year I've been so much more economical. And my cosplay for it is fantastic. Yeah, It's been a waste of money to make it, but it's just so good. I've meant to make a Lucina cosplay for a few years now... And suddenly, it becomes more meaningful. Ha! Now where's my Falchion copy? Wait, wait, what the hell am I doing? I have work to do.

Five solid hours of work later, I throw myself in bed just before seven-o-clock.

* * *

Looks like someone was nice enough to place me in my own room, as I remember I wasn't there when I fell asleep. Where was I again? Umm... Come on, Shanz, think. You only spent the past some-odd hours animating, you should have a much better recollection of what the hell happened yesterday. Oh, yeah, that's right, I fell asleep while Chrom was mopping the floor with me on the training range! Yeah, that's why I'm so damn sore. Please tell me he stopped when he saw me collapse, he has a tendency to go overboard (I nearly broke a leg because of this, wasn't happy). No injuries beyond bruises? Okay, good. I get up and stretch OH GOD THAT HURTS PAIN AND SUFFERING JEBUS PRIEST I'VE NEVER BEEN SO SORE. Okay. Don't stretch again, that was painful. Just throw your coat on– who the hell took off my coat? I'm going to have a talk with whoever put me in bed– and go get breakfast. It should be about seven, so people ought to be up by now, particularly Frederick.

I follow the smell of bacon and eggs to the pantry, and the moment I step in, I bellow happily, "BREAKFAST! Gods, I'm hungry!" That is followed by hurried foot movement to grab a plate and get me some good eats. Stahl– this morning's cook– gets out of the way as I load up my plate. After moving on from the bacon, I hesitate.

Having only heard my shout, Lissa turns around with a chuckle. "I think you spend just as much time being hungry as Stahl..."

Still staring down the eggs and sausages, I reply, "Except my portions are extremely small. Tiny stomach." I cast my eyes about for other food. Pancakes? Waffles? I guess neither of those could exist in medieval days, shit. "So, is there... Eh..." I move to step away, and my odd behavior catches the eye of the chef.

Stahl asks with only the barest note of concern in his voice, "Something wrong?"

I glance up at his godsdamn adorable face and I do believe I just blushed. Oh, I can't argue with that face. "Oh, I'm just a picky eater is all. Y'all should let me make breakfast sometime." If I ever figure out the recipe for from-scratch pancakes.

I hear a sigh, and that particular voice belongs to the guy I have black feelings for. "Eat your food, Shanzira. It wouldn't do to have a new recruit starve." Damn you all the way to hell, Frederick.

I glance at him and bring up a very true point. "More often than not, I do so anyways..." Oh, me, live with it! If you're going to fight alongside the Shepherds, you need to eat more so you can do more. I add the sausages and eggs to my plate and step out of Stahl's way, while doing so, stabbing at the eggs with a fork and jamming them in my mouth as quickly as possible. "... Not bad." Swallow. I can survive on this.

I hear Lissa's contented chirp. Is she ever _not_ happy? "Yeah, Stahl's a good cook. I knew you'd like it!" She comes over and hugs me, surprising me and nearly forcing me to drop my food. Aaaagh! I need to eat that _before_ it meets the ground!

Talk about a back-patting contest, Stahl replies with similar contentedness in his voice. "Thanks, Lissa! But I didn't think myself that good..." Humble, too! And he just goes on cooking.

I inhale the rest of the protein-loaded meal. "Mm. Thanks for the food!" I make for the exit, and I only manage to hear Lissa's voice briefly before I vanish.

"That was fast."

Ninny and I both eat food really quickly. I've wolfed down an entire can of spaghettios within five minutes, due to necessity. I had a thing for Choir– this was in my senior year of high school, the only year I took choir, and that was simultaneously when I learned how to sing– and I was running late, so I heated a can and slurped it down. Guess what I had a craving for after the show? The same junk I'd inhaled just a couple hours previously. In retrospect, it's disgusting.

Find something to do. Where's the parchment kept? Ah, there it is. Ink, quills, okay, I think I have art materials now. Let's go work on my no-sketch skills, I haven't tried no-sketch in a while.

Gods I _suck_ at no-sketch. How do I do _anything_ without planning it out first? In writing terms, I am such an architect it's not even funny. This one time, I tried writing a fanfic without planning it through, and I canceled it after eight chapters or so because it was so shitty. I feel bad for helping to contribute to the bad rep self-inserts have. Uggghhhh. Would that I had a pencil and my copics...

Well, don't falter, Shanz. If at first you don't succeed, practice the ever living shit out of it so you do succeed.

I think it's coming along, now. What time is it? I check my iPhone, again wondering at the working clock yet useless GPS. ... Shit, it's been an hour? Welp. You know what? I think I'll fuck around with my 3DS, since I apparently have it in my pocket. There we are. Wait, shit, no, footsteps, hide it! Back in the pockets. My door creaks open, and I see my fellow redhead, Sully. Good thing I put that away. I avoid a sigh or deep breath of any kind so she doesn't realize that she nearly caught me doing something I shouldn't be.

She's smirking, almost evilly. Oh, gods. I know what she's going to do. The same evil smugness apparent in her face is present in her voice as she says, "Hey, Shanz. I noticed you're a little inexperienced in fighting. Care to spar so I can help fix that?"

My eyes widen. I shouldn't know this woman's reputation, if I'm to stay in character, but my terror is hard to hide. Shivering, I answer in a low tone, "Uh, okay. Just don't kill me." That last part... Do I even need to say how justifiably sincere it was? _Shudder._

Sully's eyes close briefly as she laughs. "Har! Please!" She steps in and grasps my wrist with surprising strength, that is, surprising strength if you only saw her hands. "You shouldn't be that weak."

I gulp. "I think I'm about to walk into hell..."

* * *

And gods, that statement was almost prophetic. I've never experienced such pain in my life; although that's not saying much. I thought I was sore this morning? After I crawled away from Sully, I had trouble moving even that much because of how badly bruised I was.

She had me hopelessly– hilariously– outmatched. When I moved to attack, she'd block me to the side lazily, and when I defended, she easily found the weak points in my defense and attacked them. As wonderful as my reaction time is, her speed easily defeats it. It also doesn't help that, as I'm sure I've mentioned before, I have practically no muscle.

I'm pretty sure life itself is going to become painful really soon. I'm going to have to spar like this every day.

I must not die, I mutter to myself. But I'm in so much pain, I might be and I wouldn't know it.

A high-pitched voice, careful with her diction, snaps into my ear. "Ugh! How uncouth! Remove yourself from the ground immediately!"

Gods, that's Maribelle. Shit. I need to be polite for this one. Okay, Shanz, this shouldn't be too hard. Just pretend you're role-playing again and you'll have this down. Okay. I clear my throat and lift my head to regard her and her curly blonde hair. "My deepest apologies, good dame." For good measure, I throw in a cough here. "I haven't the strength to do so. Might I beg your assistance?"

She pauses in though, eyeing me with obvious disdain, then extends her hand with similar reluctance. "Very well, only for your polite manner." I grasp her wrist and let her pull me up, and it takes a moment of effort not to fall over. I'm really dizzy.

My vision still reeling, I murmur, "you have my sincerest thanks." I awkwardly attempt to curtsy, but I nearly fall over in doing so. It took some quick footwork to avoid that. "Perhaps I had best sit, ere I collapse again..." And with that, I grab the nearest chair and cascade myself into it.

Yonder noblewoman continues to pester me. "You keep an eloquent tongue for one so poorly dressed. What manner of background hail you from?"

Oh, crap. Time for more half-truth based bullshit. Well, family history, Shanz, I always loved this topic. "My family... is a line of knights. We own a little bit of land, nothing worth mentioning." Yeah, my grandparents own a summer home in Florida. Actually, they're pretty well off compared to my parents. The issues with living in California: Everything is expensive as shit.

Maribelle narrows her eyes in suspicion, probably justified suspicion. "Knights? Then how, may I ask, are you so woefully inept in battle?" She has a point. Well, when in doubt...

I lean my head on my hand, with my elbow resting on the arm of this chair. "I was never trained. Literally all the training I have received is from my friends and I sparring with sticks. I always lost. I am the runt of the litter, so to speak." Oh, this has a few funny stories to go with it. The only way I could win was by cheating, which I did a fair amount of. Oh, I'm downed? Sucks for you, because I still have a sword in my hand! Sucker.

She snorts judgementally, turning her head away from me slightly. Must she refused to look me in the eye? One might be regarded a coward for that. "Hmph. Do you ever toss aside this fearful countenance for backbone?" SAYS THE WOMAN WHO– Never mind...

I stop myself from sighing in irritation, and instead reply, "only in a field I am comfortable in, for example, I am quite skilled in both drawing and singing. My writing is not bad either, although my penmanship leaves something to be desired." This all comes out a bit like a ramble. Entirely in character. I could yak about my skills all day, it's the part of me I have hubris over.

Her eyes meet my own then, and I hold her gaze with polite strength. "I should like to see some of your work, and see if you quiver in fear then." Normally, I'd hesitate, but the way she worded it was like a challenge. My reaction changes from dread to a smirk.

Puffing up, I give her a warning meant to irritate with its ambiguity. "You may never know until you see... Ah, I think I can move again." Yep, if I can puff my chest out like that, I have the energy to walk. "Excuse me. It was wonderful, talking with you, although I'm afraid I never caught your name." Bullshit, I've been trying to escape this whole time. This is the first opportunity I got!

"You may call me Maribelle." With the way we're both sitting, I'd say we're about to become rivals of some sort. Well, shit. This is bad.

I nod my head to disguise my thought. "Well met, Maribelle. I am Shanzira." Trying not to worsen my soreness, I stand and give her a less awkward curtsy than before, and I stride away at a quick pace. Back inside I go! Oh, look, there's the foyer again, I think I'll just walk in there, go down a hallway, and find my room.

Gods, I finally got away! I can't really say I like her, even if she does feel bad over it. Gods, if she wants to be amicable, she should just put her mind to it and do so! Ugh. All this culminates into a hell of a sigh. "Phew..." Bump. Shit, shit, who'd I hit SUMIA, NO! CRAP, CRAP, CRAP! "Whoa! Don't fall!" With luck, I grasp her wrist before she falls, and pull her up. Despite the armor she wears, she's surprisingly lightweight. Job requisite for being a pegasus knight.

Her voice quavering, she squeaks, "Th-thank you. I'm sorry, I'm always tripping everywhere..."

I know this is a huge example of Pot-Kettle-Black, but I really do hate that attitude, the I'm-So-Sorry-I-Fuck-Everything-Up thing. Perhaps I can try to amend it. "No need to apologize, I wasn't paying attention. Hey, aren't you at trainee status?" WAY TO FUCKING GO, SHANZ. Well, there's a point to this, I swear.

She regards me shyly, apparently unaccustomed to being addressed so roughly. I bet everyone else tiptoes around her (myriad) insecurities. "U-um, yes."

I nod. "Let's you and I be sparring partners. I need to be trained by someone closer to my skill level. I'm a wimp." At the last sentence, I slump my shoulders in apparent shame. Well, it's true, and I don't need another reminder of it.

Her face brightens up and oh gods that is such an anime face. I've never seen a smile like that, it's so cute. And I'm not even attracted to women. "That sounds good! Although..." She dims again, her damn insecurities flying about everywhere. "I'm not sure I'll be much help..."

Time for a friendly shoulder pat. "Don't sell yourself short, dear. You have potential, likely more than me." If I remember right, she made a damn good unit. Me? I'm probably only good as a mage, or if I'm really lucky, myrmidon. Crap strength, good speed and skill, and hopefully my magic is good. Oh, and my luck is off the charts. The rest of my stats– resistance, defense, HP, they suck. Actually, stat-wise, I'm not far from Olivia, I think.

I hear the clink of metal and oh boy she's reaching for her lance. "Well, would you like to spar now?"

We're in a narrow hallway, love, Chrom would have our heads if we wrecked the barracks. That, and there's the more obvious issue which I bring up: "Gods, not now. Sully just mopped the floor with me. I don't have the energy to spar right now." It'll be a good long while before my soreness fades, three days at the quickest.

Her eyebrows tilt in an arc, her lips move into an O shape, and her hands raise up to her mouth. "Ooh. Well, at least you can move," she says as though pointing out the silver lining. Sumia, I'm already good with optimism. But there's something that bears pointing out.

"I can move NOW. Before, I had to sit still for quite a while." I try not to shudder, remembering that Maribelle decided that was a good time to lay some pain into my ears. "I hope my body can take this abuse." I rub my shoulders, causing bright bursts of pain in my triceps. Yeah, even THOSE got worked. Ouch.

She gestures a hand in the general direction of the pantry. "If you're hungry, I made a pie. It's in the pantry."

This woman deserves a hug. A really tight and sincere hug, I don't care how much it hurts. "You, my friend, are a lifesaver. Excuse me." I run off to snatch some of this pie, and all the while I pray Stahl hasn't gotten to it first.

And he hasn't! Lucky me. In quick succession, I swipe a plate, a fork, and a knife, then cut out a slice– a generous one, at that– and wolf it down. My stomach gurgles happily upon receiving a good filling, and my taste buds aren't protesting, either. This is good pie. Really good pie. Small wonder Chrom can fall for her just for the pies, if a guy I knew baked like this, I'd marry him, too. I wonder who among the Shepherds is the best cook? Perhaps I ought to ask him out.

It's strange. Normally, I don't think about romance a lot, because the guys around me are just unattractive. But here, the Shepherds are all drop-dead gorgeous, I think I'd be happy dating pretty much any of them. At least, I ought to draw them.

A less-than-clean thought occurs to my mind: Draw them all shirtless. Yes. YES! I must do this if I ever get the chance. Oh, gods, this will be fun. I resume digging into my pie with gusto at that thought. I'll probably go in order of recruitment– or perhaps not, that would require I draw Frederick second, and I don't think I could do that without ruining the page with blood straight from my nose. The man is handsome, and I don't like it. Oh, hell, Shanz. Sometimes, you have to do things you don't want to. You can't just ignore a Shepherd. Well, I'd probably better grab my art stuff and start sketching to prepare this. I vanish from the pantry briefly and return, ink, quill, and parchment in my arms.

Wait a minute, what I said– err, _thought_ before means I'd have to be sure to draw Kellam. That's going to be a pain in the ass. Who else don't I want to draw? Maybe–

Ricken walks in. Think of the devil and the devil shalt appear. How old is this kid again? I don't think I want to draw him shirtless, that's creepy. On the other hand, I'd be okay drawing him hatless.

He approaches and peers at my past sketches. His eyes widen a little in delight upon seeing them. "You're really good!"

I pick up a quill, open my inkwell, and nod my head to acknowledge him. "Thank you. Always gratifying to know sixteen years of practice didn't go to waste. 'Scuse me." I grab his hat by the point– took some reaching, I admit– and lift it off his head. I need to see his hair, after all.

He reaches for it with trumpeting protests. "H-hey! What are you doing?!"

"Getting a good look at your hair." I carefully replace his hat, then sketch what I saw. While I'm drawing, it occurs to me that this kid is shorter than I am. Holy. Fucking. Shit. THERE'S A GUY HERE SHORTER THAN ME! I could have teased him, holding up his hat above his reach, like some sort of asshole big sister. Oh my gods, this is going to be wonderful! Wait, draw, Shanz. Okay, I think I have it. I turn the parchment around to show him.

He almost takes a step back, his eyebrows having risen high upon seeing this. "Oh, so you were drawing me." Yep, he's impressed.

I smirk. "'Surprise and delight,' as my mom would say." I turn my gaze back to the parchment. "You're fun to draw since you're so adorable."

Squawking, he raises up and hand to shake a finger at me, like an adult telling off a child. The irony here is _beautiful_. "I-I'm not a kid!"

Chuckle. "Never said you were. I get plenty of people calling me adorable, and I'm twenty years old." Trufax, by the way.

He's taken aback at this. Haha, I bet he never thought I was that old. Everyone thinks I'm eighteen! "Ruh-really? I'm only fourteen." THAT'S his age? Damn! He IS young. At least he's not ten or so. I feel a little less guilty about wanting to draw everyone shirtless, suddenly.

But still, upon hearing his real age, a thousand different way to tease him pop into my head. "Aw, this is tempting. Well, before I tease you, howsabout you make good on that promise to teach me magic?" Yes, Shanzira, distract yourself. Now!

With the conversation having headed back to his area of expertise, he regains his former energy. "Okay, then! Here, I'll lend you my tome..." He slides a Wind across the table to me, taking a seat next to me.

Woo, I'm glad to see I get to learn my favorite branch, but that's par for the course– Ricken's a wind mage as well. We wind up in a looooong discussion over how wind magic works, and I remember it all without even taking notes. This is why I aced my tests in school without studying, actually. Besides, this is something I'm actually interested in, so I'm actively trying to absorb the information.

How magic appears to work here is much the same as it did in Archanea, but since not everyone on Earth did their homework, it's like this: Magic tomes and staves contain the power of a god, but just a tiny fraction of it. Wind, for example, uses the wind god's magic, fire uses that of the fire god, and so on. It would seem that light has been all but forgotten, but I'd say it got its time in the spotlight when Radiant Dawn happened, what with Ashera and all. Man, I need to replay the Tellius series, it was good.

Ricken's surprised to see that I'm not too bad at reading the runes– it IS the language the heron tribe used in Tellius, and I made a point of learning to read and write the damn font. Everyone who didn't know what it was always said it looked like Arabic. And I'd go and scribble it on whiteboards– I'm pretty sure an old doodle of one of my OC's is still on my dad's whiteboard at work, along with the name of said OC written in the heron tongue.

Back on topic, dinner actually happens while we're studying. This doesn't interrupt us, but I do notice I'm starting to get drowsy. I sneak a glance at my iPhone and note that it's almost seven. That in mind, I grab some of the roast pork Frederick made and wolf it down posthaste.

"Oh, gods damn it." I don't even have time to put my plate away. I shove it away from my face as it thuds onto the table.

The last thing I hear is Chrom asking, "who wants to take her to her room?" You assholes had better not make me shed my coat again...

* * *

I awaken in my dorm, as usual, to see Nin trying to tug me out of bed. Right. Work to do.

I'm still sore as all hell, though.

* * *

**I figured I'd change the pace a little and end the chapter with Shanz waking up as opposed to falling asleep. I haven't started on the chapter five script yet, but it'll get done soon. My poor brain, it's going to be strained tomorrow, what with creative writing and all. ALSO! If I don't update by Friday, don't expect an update until Monday or later! That's when Fanime's going to happen. I'll be there in my tactician cosplay, drawing, writing, or burning cash. Or I'll be playing ninja or Super Smash Bros, god knows I'm amazing at SSBB. See ya when I finish chapter five!**


	5. Foolishness

**Author's notes: This one was fun yet torturous to write. Wait, that describes writing in general, NEVER MIND. I revised the script for this multiple times before I was happy with the final product. Please review– I imagine you'll want to after reaching the ending, heh.**

**Fanime is OVER! It was really fun, and I have sixteen– count 'em– new pieces of art adorning my walls. (Arranging them was hell I mean fun.) I'm still wearing my tactician coat everywhere, because it's awesome. Someone remarked that it's "boss" today, actually.**

**We get some action here. Actually, this chapter is loaded with content, despite how skimpy its script was at first. Adding the fluff was the hard part. Enjoy!**

**EDIT: Hey, this has seventeen followers! Thanks, everyone! 3 Fifteen is the milestone I picked here. I'm happy with even this.**

* * *

This is the gig everyone's been telling me not to miss. I was asked to sing a few pretty numbers for my college's open house on the weekend, because, let's face it, I have a damn good singing voice when I actually apply myself. It's a simple matter of opening up my throat and really belting it out. Generally goes best when I have more sound to compete against. I was the second loudest in the choir back in high school, and the loudest actually got into some university for singing opera– props to her!

Besides, singing is fun. I've already had to sing a few songs from various animes– I was so delighted to sing Shinsou from Blazblue– one of the best plotlines I've ever had the joy of savoring, I swear to god. The next ditty I'm doing is the Song of Healing from the Legend of Zelda– yeah, it has words, they were written by some internetter. I actually did a duet of this with a person selling art at the Artist Alley at Fanime one year, it was fun. She had a cello, and I BELTED OUT NOTES like I'd never sung before. (Well, no. If I'd sung that badly, I'd never have tried my hand at singing again.)

Perhaps this evening I ought to ask for some sheet music to work on, that is, provided any of the Shepherds have musical talent. Can't wait 'till we recruit Olivia, I know SHE sings, at least. Shit, that's gonna be a while from now. Actually, half of the Shepherds will be married by then, that's a scary thought. What about me? Am I a marriageable (holy shit, that's a word!) character, or am can only a male Robin marry me? I dunno. I mean, I've toyed with the notion of dating these guys, but let's face it– I met them in my fucking dreams. And I belong in this world, don't I? I should find someone here.

Good, I have a good excuse to not give into Frederick's charms. I think I'll survive the next two years! Provided I EVER STOP YAWNING, ARGH!

I reach for a can of root beer; Barq's, to be specific, and down half the caffeine-loaded drink. Mm. My favorite brand of root beer, and the only caffeinated one, to boot. Gotta pump this stuff into myself to stay away. "Not falling asleep," I mumble determinedly.

Beside me, Nin nods. "Yeah, you don't want to fall asleep during a performance. How did your sleep schedule get so messed up, anyways?"

She's here for moral support, so to speak. I asked her to tag along and keep me awake should I get all yawn–y during this. Gotta stay awake for all the potential freshmooks coming in and viewing the open house. Oh, "Freshmook" is my nickname for freshmen. Sophomores are "Sofamooks," juniors are "Jumpiors," and Seniors are "Senile-ers". I made 'em up back in high school, and oddly enough made up each nickname as I passed each year, for example, I didn't think of "jumpiors" until I was a senior. Came up with "senile–ers" JUST before I graduated.

Back on topic. Nin, moral support, stay awake. Yeah. I ramble when I'm sleepy, shut up. She doesn't have much to do today, and of late her timidness has been improving, so to stretch her comfort zone I dragged her out here.

Poke, poke. What is it– Oh, yeah, she asked me a question. Shit, I really _am_ out of it. "I have no clue, it just happened." This is punctuated by another yawn, gods fucking damn it. Wait, gods? Again with that error, ugh! Are those douchebags _trying_ to wake me up or something? At... I check my iPhone, TWELVE AT NIGHT? If I fall asleep, I'm gonna wallop whoever woke me up, I swear to god. I drink another quarter of my root beer can. Must. Stay. Awake.

Ninny pats me on the back, sad to say, it doesn't wake me up much. " I hope you start getting normal sleep again." You'd think listening to heavy metal for a few hours would keep me awake or something. Wait. What if that's how desperate the Shepherds are to wake me, that it takes this much effort to stay awake? Damn! Why the hell do they need me up, a surprise session of Frederick's Fanatical Fucking Fitness Hour?! Okay, what do I normally do to wake up? Swing around my practice spear. Yeah, it's why I grabbed a lance back in that fight in Southtown, I've actually been trained– briefly– in their use. Chinese water spear, bitches.

With all these thoughts percolating in my head, a lazy "mm" is all I hum in response to Nin. I need to put more gusto into this, gotta stay awake. Need a rousing song to sing. What the hell am I singing next again? Oh. Right. A fucking lullaby. I wanna do Shinsou again.

Phone vibrates. Pull from pocket. A text from Mike. Okay, what is it? She says "I'm really sleepy for some reason. Don't know w" and it cuts off there. Weird. Put away phone. Maybe she accidentally hit the backspace while typing.

A tap briefly bothers my shoulder, opposite to Nin; an old friend of mine from high school (who also attends here) just approached. "Song of healing, you're up." Yeah, sounds about right, this song– Escape from the City, from Sonic Adventure 2 Battle– is about to end.

Taking care not to show my yawn, I respond, "'kay," and approach the stage as the final chord fades. I adopt my usual singing posture in front of the mic– straight-backed, but not too straight, and I drop my jaw, allowing airflow in my respiratory system. Now I just need the right face: Tilt my eyebrows up a little, this is a pretty ditty, and clasp my hands at my chest. The guitar begins softly as I sing a tune I've done well to keep memorized over the years.

"Day to night, dark to light, fall the sands of time."

Like an hourglass, but one can never turn it over. It passes and cannot be undone, the sand cannot rise back up.

"Let the years, like the gears of a clock unwind."

There's a lot of people in the seats. It is getting towards the end of the open house, so everyone who was taking the tour is filing in here.

"In your mind, walk through time, back to better days..."

My childhood was a little dark compared to now. What better days, the days in which I had nothing to do but lose myself in a game?

"Memories, like a dream, chase tears away!"

That verse ends on a high note, it's so pretty. Yeah, when I think on it, I do have some damn good memories. I have three really good friends, like Ninny, and the two buddies I've known since elementary school. Mike, Shio, whatever I call her; and Welsh, as he prefers to be called over Skype.

"Like a star in the sky, darkness can't reach you,"

Pfft. From the earthly view, stars are forever flies caught in the spiderweb of a dark sky. What the hell. Although, a Lord of the Rings quote wouldn't go amiss here. Ëarendil!

"Light the night– joy is light– till the new day..."

That is very true. Even in the darkest of times, optimism can get you through. I'm living proof, it got my through my lowest days. Yeah, that's right, my darkest hours are behind me. I'm not some kind of wimpy, pathetic protagonist who knows nothing, you know! Even IF I always consider my life a story of sorts.

"Cast away that old face, full of gloom and spite,"

Words I needed to take to heart five years ago. Man, I had some bad influences. I kept fawning over the anti–heroes and villains, and taking in some of their personality traits. No more!

"With this mask, I shall ask, give me your light!"

On this note, I fall to the floor, my focus unbroken but my energy spent. All I hear is Nin shouting my name as everything goes black; I close my eyes. Damn it. Okay, fine, Ylisse. What do you want now?

* * *

I sit up and hit my head on something hard. Another skull, from the sound of that dull thud. This means whoever woke me up is about to get an earful. "WHO THE FUCK WOKE ME UP AT MIDNIGHT AND **_WHY?!"_**

Frederick steps back in alarm, cringing with his hands over his ears. Yeah, I'll bet you didn't expect that, jackass! If you got my up for your damn fitness hour, let me tell you, I'm more likely to get exercise from murdering you in a horrible and bloody manner before I'll endure your damn torture at this ungodly hour–

Frederick cuts across me, panic raising the pitch of his voice notably. The comedy of this sound mitigates my temper somewhat. "Milady, this is no time to protest or sleep; we are under attack and I have attempted to rouse you for the past five minutes!"

I stayed awake for five whole minutes while Frederick, of all people, was trying to wake me. I. Am. A. Badass. Root beer and heavy metal helped. (I don't sing the metal songs, I sing the pretty stuff in between, whenever people decide they're tired of bleeding from their ears.) I wonder if I could sleep through Frederick trying to wake me for even longer, just to fuck with him?

Wait, there's shit to do.

With one hand, I grab my coat, weighed a little by the wind tome Ricken gave me; with the other, I reach for my spear. Head bowed forward in anger, I storm past Frederick, out of my room, simultaneously slipping the sleeves of my coat on. "Time to show these fuckers why they don't mess with Shanzira fuckin' Dinrel." This exits my mouth as a low growl.

Oh. "Dinrel" is the last name I coined to go with the username "Shanzira". Oh, all right, I admit it! It's the name I use for my self-insert whenever I role-play. Shush, it might be highly indulgent, but it's fun as all hell. I don't mind using it here; I guess I'm not being myself here, but rather, the character of my self-insert. She and I aren't quite the same, though. She'd always wear a long, green-and-gold coat, whereas I have Robin's coat. She's generally always used magic, and I keep reaching for my spear instead. It's weird.

Back to reality. I've hurtled myself through the hallway and into the foyer, and I get a good view of Robin, Virion, Miriel, and Ricken doing their best to stave off the invaders with their ranged attacks so they don't make contact with us. Behind the walls, unseen by our foes, are those of us who can't attack long-range. I'm with Chrom, Sumia, and Sully. Oh, Lissa's here, too, didn't notice her. Directing my words at Chrom, I ask, "So who's attacking us?"

I almost jump; Frederick ran up behind me to answer. "Unfortunately, they wear no colors or crests by which we might identify them." You just _love_ scaring the shit out of me, don't you, Frederick?! Asshole! But I do have logical commentary for this, so I have to try and keep a lid on it.

"So we're facing black knights. Great." "Black knight" isn't just a name or a title, it's what you call any warrior, knight, or fighter who garbs him/herself in black to hide their identity. You could say (SUNGLASSES) we're facing anon hate.

Ba-dum-tish; YEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!

"We'll figure it out later. What matters is that they're trying to kill us." Thank you for bringing me back to reality, Chrom. Right. Gods, I'm an airhead sometimes.

I'm supposed to be pissed, remember? Frederick DID wake me up in the middle of a gig. At fucking midnight. Yeah, I'm gonna kill him later on. "They sure picked a lousy time to attack. Looks like I've got something to take my ire out on." I raise my spear up, holding it parallel to the ground, finding with my right hand its center of gravity. I grasp the haft with only my thumb, and flex a muscle or two to practice the movement.

"What are you–" I ignore Chrom's and Frederick's concerned squawks, step out from behind the safety wall, and toss my spear javelin-style at the nearest enemy. He falls, blood spurting from his chest. (He'd already been shot by Virion and zapped by Robin, anyways.) I run by his corpse, grasp my spear, yank it out, and keep running.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Robin screams. She actually managed to finish the question Chrom and Frederick tried to ask. Two axemen find me, they swing. Step back, stab nearer one in the leg. Remember, Shanz, you have five feet: Use it! I laugh evilly at these guys as I dodge the next swing, their range is so tiny. That, and it's like they just picked up their axes. How are these guys such a threat? I mean, _I'M_ kicking their butts–

SHIT I'M PRETTY SURE THAT'S AN ARROW IN MY SHOULDER! Fall back, fall back, where the hell is Lissa– OW ANOTHER ONE IN THE BACK DON'T FALL SHANZ DON'T FALL OW OW _OW OW _**_OW!_**

"You're a fool," Robin says as I pass her by. Yeah, well, tell me that had some positive effect. I slump against a wall and vaguely gesture at the arrows in me, having seen the pale yellow blur that is Lissa. OUCH! She pulled out the one in my shouuuuuullllldaaaagggghhh oh man that itched so bad. Next is my ba–AAACCKKK OH GODS I NEVER WANT TO GET SHOT again oh it ITCHES I just wanna scratch like hell– oh it's gone.

"So, Robin, are you going to tell me we gained nothing from my moment of idiocy?" I turn to face her, rubbing my shoulder so as to scratch the remnants of the itch. I'm really glad I have flexible arms; I can scratch my back later, because I think it still itches as well.

"Well," she glances ahead while she pauses, assessing the situation, "Chrom, Frederick, Sully, Stahl, and Vaike rushed ahead to cover you. I stayed behind to give orders. You created an impressive opening, Shanzira. Congratulations on not dying, but don't do it again."

So it appears. We've pushed the vanguard forward quite a ways. All that in so short a time? I guess I was up there longer than I thought, it happened so fast. Ha, see, I actually helped. "Don't underestimate my luck, Robin." I curve my neck around the corner again to watch for an opportunity to join my comrades. I believe I already _have_ mentioned that my luck is bananas– Thousands of them!– and here lies the proof. I just rushed these guys and came back alive. Booyeah.

"I'll be sure not to overestimate it, either." There's a lapse in the conversation; arrows and magic soar by our heads, growing fewer and fewer as time passes, until they stop altogether. Yep, we're winning. The sound of metals clashing and screams echoing becomes farther away from us, though they still fill the silence. "Do you intend to rush out there again?" Robin asks.

HELLO, OPENING! I raise my lance and run past her, briefly responding with an obligatory "yes" before I get too far out. Robin screams my name, but I ignore her; I'm looking for Chrom so I can fight with him. (Here's my logic: He can't die, so I'll be safe next to him.) THERE HE IS! I run up to his left side and "pair up" with him, as the game would call it. Gloatingly: "Did you appreciate that opening I made earlier, Boss?"

He scowls but doesn't look away from the foe in front of him. "I didn't appreciate that you nearly killed yourself doing it. That was stupid." Jeez! Was it that bad? Gods, I'm still alive, quit complaining! Only good came of it, so shut it. WHOOPS THAT'S A WIDE SWING, DUCK! Hot damn, Chrom, you nearly bifurcated me. I'd like to keep the lower half of my body, thanks! I might need that in the future.

"You complain that I nearly killed myself, then you proceed to try and kill me! What the hell, man?!" Does he think I can't handle myself or something? Fine! I'll prove that I can do shit. Twirl spear, run forward, impaling streak, GO! Stab through the chest, stab in the leg, butt-spike in the hand, stab in the crotch! Butt-spike to the face, duck beneath a sword, butt-spike to the knee (where's an archer when you need one), stab in the ankle. Hoo, I'm short on breath. Back behind Chrom I go.

He punches me in the shoulder, nearly knocking me off balance (though it occurs to me that he held back). "Shanzira, have a care that you live to see the sun rise again!" OW! Prick! Fine! Stop treating me like a helpless kid, I'm twenty, for fuck's sake! OLDER THAN YOU! I'll remind you of that in the morning! Or maybe the moment I stop having to lean on my spear while I catch my breath. Aw, fuck it. I'm still pissed. We ought to be close to the leader soon, right? Ah, there he is, he uses a lance, like me– Oh gods, the fucker has a woman in front of him, and he's holding her as a meat shield.

"Chrom, they have a hostage." My tone is low, wary. It's obvious the gravity of the situation has finally hit me.

He sounds just as annoyed as I am when he replies: "Yes, Shanz, I noticed. ROBIN!" He shouts over his shoulder. The tactician is at our side within a minute, Lissa with her, for some reason. "He has a hostage. What do we do?"

"You three!" I look back at the leader of our assailants; he's pointing his lance at us and plainly addressing us. "Give over the redheaded woman there and she–" he gestures to the woman in his arms– "lives!"

Light bulb! "Robin, I have a plan. Here." I give her my lance. "I'll handle this."

"Shanzy!" Lissa cries out, alarmed. "No!"

Robin's eyes bulge in outrage. "Shanzira, you can't– He'll kill you, and he'll kill the woman, too! This is foolishness!" She reaches forward to grasp me, but Chrom holds her back. He sees what I'm doing, clever man.

After all, I can't kill this guy if I don't get close. I still have a weapon on me, anyways. The boss– that's what I'm going to call him– stares at me curiously as I approached, plainly not having expected me to comply. He's got short, blonde hair and a goatee, and he's actually kind of handsome–

Stop looking at his face. He's about to die. I'm about to blast magic into him and hopefully kill him with the one hit, and the woman– Oh, gods. That's Mike. That's my best friend! How'd she get here?!

She recognizes me, as well, her eyes seeming to adjust to the darkness as she peers through her glasses. Panicking, she inhales air to shout to me. "J– ACK!"

The leader silences her with a violent shake. "Quiet, you."

Right. You're on stage, Shanzira. Furrow your brow, puff up your chest, look resolute– which you are. Look as though you'd sacrifice your life to save this girl– which you gladly would if required. You do owe her a lot, after all. Not money, not possessions, but you owe her for being the best friend you could ever have.

And he buys it. Mike buys it. Robin buys it. Lissa buys it. My act fools everyone but myself. I think even Chrom is starting to fall for it.

"Excellent," the boss says, tossing Mike to the side. She lands face-down in the dirt, and her hands and feet seem to be bound. He raises up his lance, cruelty flashing in his teeth, and he takes but one moment, perhaps to revel in the change my face would make if I realized I had really and truly been tricked–

And that is exactly the opening I needed.

"WIND!" I scream, lifting my right hand and flicking my wrist. A gale, punctuated by a lambent green glow, coalesces around my arm and blasts from my fingertips, sending the sucker a good five feet away from me.

Unfortunately, he got me, too. He got me by the collarbone, and his lance clatters to the ground, blood caking the tip. More of my blood joins it on the ground.

"ROBIN!" I shout. "MY SPEAR!" She tosses it to me and I rush the guy again. He's only able to glance up from the blood on his chest he had regarded previously, and then my spearhead meets his jugular. I do believe I hit the spine as well. He falls to the ground, dead as a doornail.

I lean against my spear, digging the butt into the ground. That's right, there's a terrible, stinging agony in my collarbone... There's blood all over my coat, too... On my arms... Hands... It's going down my shirt, too. Red everywhere... blood drops splatter on the ground, then splatter into the air as my torso splashes into the puddle.

I'm bleeding out... It hurts... It hurts...

Mike's voice is the last thing I hear before all goes black.

"No! Not you!"

* * *

I sit up and my abdominal muscles protest from the sudden strain. My lungs heave as my diaphragm works to ensure proper airflow in them. My spluttering for breath is brief, however. I find myself in my dorm, with Nineeyena sitting at her computer. She's turned to face me since my noisy awakening, and now she stands to approach, eyebrows high with concern.

I'm still grappling with what just happened. "H... h... Holy hell. That was..." I think I might vomit. I run my fingers over my collarbone, relieved to find dry, unbroken skin there. I pull out my phone and send Mike a text: "Are you okay?"

Nin apparently had a similar idea. "Are you all right? You fell asleep in front of everyone, they freaked out and nearly called an ambulance." Wow. Did they really? Yaaaawwwwwn.

I lay a hand over my heart. "I had a nightmare... I think I died." But given these insane palpitations, I'd say I'm still alive. My anxiety's going nuts. It hasn't been this bad since... Oh, gods. I might be in for another anxiety attack. Stay calm. Stay calm.

"Everyone's worried about you," Nin says, distracting me. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Anything to keep my mind off my heart. AUGH! THERE I GO AGAIN!

My first response is, _Both here and in Ylisse, I imagine._ But that's the first thing I thought, not the first thing I said. "I'll ease their fears." I stand. But I can't ease the fears of everyone in Ylisse... I... I'm pretty sure I died there. I'm sorry, Chrom. I take a step, fall to one knee, wrap hands around chest. There's that anxiety attack, aaaaahhHHHHHH!

PLEASE, SOMEONE, LET IT STOP! RELEASE ME FROM MY FEAR! I CAN'T HANDLE IT! LET IT STOP! LET EVERYTHING BE OKAY! PLEASE! Tell me everything's going to be okay... Mommy... Mom, where are you? Back home... Gods, I need you... I just died... Mom, please reassure me...

A practical godsend, Ninny grasps one of my hands and pulls me to my feet. Thank the gods I have you here, Nin. I embrace her in a tight hug and sob softly into her shoulder.

"Was it that bad a nightmare?" She asks.

I nod, staining her shirt with tears. "I died. I died to save Mike. And everyone else there told me not to do it, but I did anyways." Sniffle. Oh, Mom. I want to just rest in your arms one more time, and forsake my adulthood for the security of youth...

I wipe my tears gently before I exit to reassure everyone. That's what I always do: I give hope and light to others, keeping none for myself. I'll be sure to visit home later today and talk to mom.

* * *

When I return from that to reluctantly throw myself in bed at ten o clock, I find nothing but darkness awaiting me past the veil of sleep. I awaken the next morning in my dorm as though no time passed whatsoever. Mike has not returned the text I sent her yesterday.

I guess I did die.

Ninny notes my sobriety as I dress myself and sit down to animate.

* * *

**YUMMY CLIFFHANGERS! Oh, I'm not canceling this, don't worry. I'll continue it, I know exactly how, anyways. As for who these mysterious attackers are, THAT will be revealed later. They're not Plegian or Grimleal, I'll say that now. The idea for them popped up with I was typing up the script and I was like "THAT'S GENIUS! OH MY GOD, YES!" so I'm running with it. Please don't ask me how this is going to continue if Shanz is dead, I'm bad at keeping secrets. You'll find out when I finish the next chapter, anyways! Shouldn't be too long, I have a hell of a head start on the script.**


	6. Effing Miracles

**Author's notes: I just want to say, sometimes Shanzira is wrong. She normally doesn't lie, but that doesn't mean she's not an unreliable narrator.**

**I was really bored and I have nothing else to do except dishes, so Chapter Six is done! I haven't started on Chapter Seven, it might be graduation before that happens. Do not expect an update on Thursday, because that's when I graduate.**

**Adding the prose to this one was hard. I also had to revise the script a lot, too. Phew... Hopefully things will get a little clearer after this. Oh, wait, shit, I have to iron out the rest of my plans first. Yeah, it'll be a little while before the next chapter. On that note, enjoy this one!**

* * *

"She's still not awake...?"

Why am I hearing Chrom's voice?

I'm dead. This is a dream. A nightmare. Fuck my subconscious. Even I'm not lucky enough to survive like that. Even if I had, I probably would have awoken last night or whenever the hell I was supposed to be awake, or some shit. I dunno. I'm not going to bother to figure out this whole damn situation _now_. It's in the past. It's just haunting me in my dreams now, fittingly. Damn it to hell!

Despite the ire flinging itself around my skull, I keep a straight face and refuse to open my eyes. I'm good at pretending to be asleep, and I'm not breaking that habit now. Not even in dream hell.

"Her collarbone snapped, Chrom. She probably won't wake up for another few days."

So that's why my chest hurts like all hell! Fuckers. And jeebus, Lissa, couldn't you at least heal THAT?! Unless, of course, that's the fact that this is a NIGHTMARE talking, and convenience on that level is far too kind. Then again, I'm pretty sure that if she hadn't tried to heal me at all, I'd be in far deeper agony as opposed to having to deal with this stinging ache.

Robin's sigh is the next voice I hear. "I suppose this is the price she pays for disobeying orders..."

Stop feeding my temper, Robin, I want to slug someone. You don't want to be on the receiving end of one of my slaps. They. Hurt. Yes, I get the point! I did something stupid and I died. Can I get out of hell now?

"She cared more about saving me than her own health. I actually expected her to do something like that."

Mike?

_Mike?!_

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN MY NIGHTMARES?! Oh, this is a new low for my subconscious, using my best friend in the worlds against me. I think I might need to see the psychiatrist again. Or at least a therapist.

"What I'm talking about is the fact that she rushed out into the field on her own, twice. It's a miracle she's still breathing." Robin sounds matter-of-factly, like this is just another event in her life. Oh, wait, it is. She's not me. Fuck you, Robin. Remember that time you set a tree on fire because you weren't paying attention? Don't make me haunt you.

Lissa moans softly, sounding annoyed and frustrated."Good thing you brought me along, Robin, or she wouldn't be..."

Wait.

Hold the phone and back the truck up.

I'm alive?

I'm _a-fucking-live?!_

I need to make sure. I let out a groan to get their attention, then I breathe in again. When I exhale for the second time, I accompany it with these words, projecting as much as I can without hurting myself: "Somebody slap me."

There's a shuffle of feet; I believe everyone just turned to look at me. This is the signal for me to open my eyes. My, there are a lot of people huddled around my sickbed, aren't there? Oh, and of course, they all feel the need to shout my name at once in surprise. I couldn't even pick out the voices in that, other than Chrom's, the only male voice. His voice is really low. It's a baritone, I swear. This is about the time I finally open my goddamn eyes.

There's a sigh in the back, and another masculine voice speaks. "Of course. How could one expect such a stubborn woman to remain unconscious for very long?"

I jump in alarm. The next thing I say best sums up my thoughts: "Fucking shit. Where'd you come from, Frederick?" I can't even SEE him in– Oh, wait, there he is. He's taller than everyone else here, and he's in the back. And he's still in full armor, of course. Why can't he ever take it off so we can see that silly suit he wears–

What the fuck am I thinking? Shanz, get your head out of your ass.

The handsome guy answers my rudely-asked question and saves me from my gutter hell of a mind. "I have been present this entire time." This guy is like Kellam, I swear. Wait. What if Kellam taught him how to be stealthy? _Fuuuuuucccckkk..._

I let out a sigh. Gods damn this whole mess. I had an anxiety attack a couple of days ago for nothing? Gods. "Still waiting on that slap. Who wants to oblige?" There's no chorus of "Me!"s like one would expect. Actually, I'm not sure I know enough people who would volunteer to make a chorus. I mean, there's my brother and my sister, but that's it. Where are those two knuckleheads when I need 'em?

Lissa's the one who brings up the flaw in my logic, the flaw I'm not really fond of right now. "Um, Shanzira, you're still injured. Nobody in their right mind would slap someone in their sickbed–" Smack! Thank you, Mike! Thank you! "Shio!" Lissa sounds so shocked.

Wait. She's going by that name here? Uh, okay. Shio is it. Besides, I bet the whole Mike-is-a-masculine-name thing was going to confuse people. But that's why it made such a good gag. Well, I always was good with name adjustments.

Remember, Shanz, it's Shio here. Okay.

Mike, uh, I mean, Shio, holds her hands close to her chest, her eyebrows raised in distress. "Was that too hard...?"

I swear she has a Sumia complex. Minus the whole I-have-a-way-of-getting-what-I-want thing. And the tripping. Augh, okay! What I mean is that she's timid and has low self-confidence. There. Simple? But that whole self-confidence thing is why I'm her best friend, some hubris put up for amusement purposes never hurt anybody.

No counterexamples, please.

Lissa continues her indignant squawking: "You don't just–"

Immediate interrupt: Activate "JUSTIFY" skill! Effect: Saves your friend's butt. "So I'm not dreaming, I'm not dead. I'm alive. Thank you." I nod my head at Mike-I-mean-Shio. It's SHIO, gods damn it! I'm not normally this bad, I swear. Urgh.

The next thing Chrom says reflects an often spoken truth: "You two are very strange, that's for sure." Heh. Hehahahahaha! We've been cracking jokes about this since middle school! WE KNOW WE'RE WEIRD! Hahaha! Where are all the sanity jokes we made? I dunno, we stuffed 'em in our marbles, and we've long since lost those!

I shake my head, still smirking from my internal amusement. "After the number of times I've hit Shio over the head with my sketchbook, it's about time she started paying me back." Long story short, we discussed headcanons and funny scenarios in class a _lot_. Sometimes, I would hit her over the head with my sketchbook, because they were so feelsy. (Oh gods, the future past dlc... Poor Morgan.) Back on track, I need to clarify this. "So, just to be sure: I am still alive."

Shio nods and tilts her head with curiosity. "Yeah. Why?"

Thank. The. Gods.

I relax myself and release one hell of a sigh. So this isn't a nightmare. Okay. Okay. This is real. I've never been so relieved in my life. "I legitimately thought I was dead." I sit up, trying to ignore the burst of pain in my chest. "Okay, break time's over." Get up, you lazy piece of shit. There's work to do. I shift my feet so they dangle over the floor.

The lolita princess rushes in and tries to push me back as gently as possible. Sorry, love, but you can't do that, it's either hurt me or let me up. "Shanzira, you still have bandages on you for a reason! Your wounds might reopen!"

I snort and wave Lissa away. "In my experience, the quickest way to make pain go away is to move around. I refuse to sit idly by in a sickbed while I get better." Translation: I'm fucking bored of lying here, I'm getting my ass up. I want to draw, write, and it might be a good idea if I studied magic. Or something. Probably won't get to spar.

"Of course," Shio sighs. Here's her tone of voice: Imagine she's saying "Typical."

Robin sounds like she's wondering about my (already questionable) sanity when she asks Shio, "is this normal for her?"

I smile at my best friend's response: "Yes. Like Frederick said, she's stubborn."

Nod head. "Proud of it, love." Onto my feet! OH WOW THAT HURTS. Now that I've aligned my spine like it should be, it hits me that the frame of my torso was damaged more than I thought it was. Daaaaaaaamn. I can hardly feel the soreness of my feet. "Ooh... That could've felt better." Don't. Touch. Broken. Collarbone. That'll make it worse.

Aarrrgh. Do I need to say this out loud, Lissa? Hands off. Stop trying to push me back into bed. I push her hands away, frowning determinedly. I will turn this into a fucking game of ninja, and I will _kick your ass_, even if I'm still recovering. (Okay, I'm not that good at ninja. My strength lies in dodging, my reflexes are pretty sweet. For anyone who plays Dungeons and Dragons, my dexterity is probably around seventeen at level one. Yeah. It's that ridiculous. Actually, I managed to make a thief whose dexterity was twenty at level one. Luck of the dice rolls, and she was an Eladrin, so plus two dexterity.)

"Lissa," Chrom says with a sigh, "I don't think you're doing any good. She'll be fine." With that, the prince turns on his heel and leaves. I guess he determined that one of his new recruits will be fine, and thus needs to spend no further time worrying about said recruit.

I smile and point a thumb at myself, emboldened by Chrom's vote of confidence. "Takes more than this to put me out of action." Trufax! I once sprained my ankle on my sixteenth birthday, and it didn't stop me from enjoying it. Actually, I believe I've sprained both my ankles, but at different times. Up until now, though, that was the worst injury I'd ever suffered. Nah, my weakness lies in my immune system. ... Oh, shit. I should crash that train of thought ASAP.

Lissa glares at me for a moment. "... Fine." She turns and leaves, and Frederick– who was silent the whole time– follows her, since both the royals have left the room.

Is that ship about to happen? If I remember right, it was adorable.

"The Regna Ferox mission is in two days. Are you still coming?" Oh. Robin's still here. Thank god I didn't totally derp and start yakking with Shio over stuff, that would've been distressing.

I incline my head in her direction. "Of course." How long until it happens? ... Two days, if my math is right. Okay, no problem. I'll be recovered enough to fight by the time that one Risen attack happens.

Shio pipes up. "Can I come too?"

I smile. Of course she wants to stick to me. I wrap one arm around her shoulder, which is a bit of a task; I'm 4'11" and she's 5'9". Yeah, height difference. Funny how tall and short are best buddies, eh? (I've already made a ton of gags over it.)

The good tactician nods. "Sure. I'll talk to Chrom. Excuse me." On her way out, though, she pauses, turns, and looks at Shio and I, a strange look on her face. What? What is it? Okay, fine, then. Leave and don't tell us what looks so funny. I wait for her footsteps to fade from earshot.

"We have a lot to catch up on, buddy." Not to make Shio nervous, but I'm going to grill her so hard. Oh, the questions I have. I remove my arm and sit back on the bed for comfort. Oof, still hurts.

I bounce up slightly as Shio depresses the spot next to me on the mattress with her weight alone. "Yeah..." She seems hesitant.

First question. "What I want to know is how YOU got here." Although, I shouldn't be surprised that I'm the only one here. That would be incredibly self-centered. No, my surprise is directed at the fact that of all the people to join me, it's my best friend.

Not that I'm not grateful, mind. There's no one else I'd rather have by my side than Shio.

Ten bucks says we can support. No bet? Yeah, no one would take that up.

Shio's hands float around in vague gestures as she thinks aloud. "I woke up in Plegia about two months ago. Henry found me." Wait, WHAT?!

"Two MONTHS?!" I splutter. "I've only been here a week, if my math is right..." And she met HENRY?! Oh gods, I will NOT let them marry, I swear! Never! That would be baaaaad! I will cockblock all night if I have to! Thank god we don't recruit him for a while...

Wait a minute, I just shouted. I quickly swivel my head around to make sure no one's within earshot. Okay, I don't hear footsteps. I'm relieved. I relax while Shio keeps talking.

"I know dark magic, so I can help out on the battlefield. Actually," This next part comes out thoughtfully, "I used curses to help you feel better. You would've been unconscious much longer if I hadn't been around."

That would explain a lot.

"Okay, fine." I'll buy it. I've never known her to lie to me, even if she IS acting funny. Next question! "Who were those guys, how did they capture you, and why?" Perhaps that would be three questions. But hey, I rolled it into one. Score for me.

She hesitates, as though it's some personal failing of hers. (She does this a lot.) "I don't know. They're not Plegian, they're not Grimleal, and they're not brigands." Well, she ruled out the obvious. Valm's busy and they wouldn't even THINK about here, so they're definitely not Valmese, so... Damn, I don't know WHO these guys could be. "They were going to kill me until they changed their plans and came here. I only found out at the last second that they were planning to use me as a hostage."

Those. Fucking. Bastards. If we ever encounter their buddies, I swear, I'm going to kill them all. I don't even care who'd miss 'em.

But Shio left a hole in her answer, so I press her. HOLD IT! "You still didn't answer how."

The weight on the mattress shifts as she leans back, getting comfortable while telling a story. "I was practicing hexes with Henry when they pounced on us. He tried his best to save me, but somehow, they got away with me. I think Henry survived, though." She pauses and thinks. "Around the time they changed their minds on what to do with me, I heard one of them say, "there's another one. This one might come in handy to kill the second one." Then they started to head towards Ylisse..."

That gives me pause.

"... That is disturbing news..." So they targeted specifically Shio and I? Why? The world hardly knows of our existence. "Well, I'll bear this in mind. For now, I think we should get you outfitted, weapons-wise." I stand up, trying not to wince as my collarbone screams in protest. And Shio said she was blocking out part of the pain? Hot damn, that... I don't think I could move if she weren't around. Thank you, BFFsie. "I'll see if we have any dark tomes lying around."

"Actually, I got mine back after you killed those guys. Robin went and looted the bodies."

I turn to my now-standing best friend, disturbed a little further. Robin? Looting bodies? "She... Okay." I'll roll with it. We could use the weapons, after all. "So why didn't you return my text the day before yesterday?" You know, the one where I asked if you were all right?!

A lazy shrug is all she responds with. "I was busy with college stuff."

She has this terrible habit of missing my calls and not returning my texts, usually because her phone died or she turned it off for some insane reason. It's not rare that she's unreachable, I hate it to death. Well, try to be unreachable NOW, bitch! We're under the same roof!

"Of course," I sigh. "Well, it's good to see you're all right, I was worried." I turn and hug her and OH GODS THAT HURTS LIKE HELL OH SBHJCSKBHJCKVBHJSKXVCGSHKJVGHXVHJ!

This reminds me of a scene we did back in our senior year of high school for Drama 2... It involved a hug, a cringe, and an "oh my god are you all right" pose at the end. We had a lot of fun mapping out the gestures, although everyone said it was really confusing. Yeah, we probably should've written it better, but we were eighteen. We were high school idiots. Teenagers. You get the point.

"Oh, I should mention," she raises up her shoulders a little in apprehension, "Frederick doesn't really trust me, and if he knew I was in Plegia... Yeah." Naturally.

"So mum's the word? No prob." I nod at this. A secret like this is easy to keep. I mean, I have trouble keeping my OWN secrets, but those of other people are easily hidden. "C'mon, you need some training." I grab her by her sleeve and drag her out of the room, and it's only then that I realize my stomach is growling at me, and I'm feeling a little faint. "And I need some food! Wonder who cooked breakfast?" I don't smell anything, though...

Her response is ginger. "Sully."

"O–oh. Fuck." I hate starving, I hate starving so much. Son of a bitch, I'm gonna starve. Not in this condition, that's bad. "I'll just, uh, I'll just draw, then." Maybe I should draw Shio in her new outfit? Wait, I've hardly looked at it. Time to amend that.

She's wearing this cape over a robe, both are made of a thin material of some kind. The robe covers her arms and legs, and the cape– Oh. Yeah. Dark mage outfit, but more conservative. Makes sense. She's never been confident about her body. And she managed to keep her glasses throughout that whole mess. Good, she needs 'em.

She sighs at the awkward silence. "I'll go train with Ricken and Miriel... Bye," And she walks away, so I don't get a better look at her outfit.

One more awkward change about my situation. At least it's positive. God knows I needed a friend here who I can dump my worries onto. Shio is like a godsend.

Welp, I grab my parchments, quill, and ink and sit down at the table in the pantry. Time to work on Project Shirtless. Let's start with... Uh. I don't want to start with Chrom, and I'd much rather skip Frederick... Oh, to hell with it. Start with Chrom. Draw them in order of recruitment.

That way I don't have to draw Henry for two years! Whoo! Let's start sketching.

* * *

...

...

I fucking hate this piece of shit. Rip rip rip, toss. Gods, I haven't drawn anything so crappy since I was twelve. It's like I completely forgot what the guy looked like, and then decided to top it off by drawing left-handedly. As Inigo Montoya said, "I am not left-handed!"

I rest an arm on the table and sit my head atop it. Yes, I know this is bad for my circulation, but I don't like lying my head on the table without a pillow. Seriously, it hurts my neck. I'm getting tired... At least my collarbone isn't troubling me much.

Footsteps. I look up. I see Robin, messing around with her silvery-blonde hair. I allow myself a smirk for a bit until she tries to pull her hands away and finds they're stuck in her own hair.

What, does she have a bird's nest hidden in there? "Oh, Robin. Looks like you've gotten yourself into quite a tangle." It's like she doesn't even know how to handle her own hair.

She freezes up and looks at me, then gives a nod, as slight as her impromptu _hairness_ allows her. "Yes... I hate to impose, but could you–?"

I know what she's asking, so I go ahead and interrupt. "No prob! I can handle hair like I handle a pen! Where's your comb?" She tilts her head towards her pocket; I reach in and grasp it. "Ah, here it is. Just a second..." With a few deft movements, her fingers are freed, and her hair de-clumped. I stand back, proud.

She lifts a mirror from her pocket and regards her reflection with awe. "Wow. You de-tangled it almost instantly." I watch as Robin tilts the mirror around to get a better view of all the usual tangle-spots.

I nod proudly. Thank you, love. "When you have hair as unruly as mine, you learn how to handle it." I twirl a lock of my bangs around my finger, then I tilt my head sideways in thought. "It's gotten much better over the past decade, though. But you," I point my hair-twirling finger at Robin, "it's like you never learned how to do anything other than tie it."

Her next face is one of distress and embarrassment. "Er, well, yes, I can't say I remember doing anything else with it..."

MENTAL HEADDESK. "Oh, right, amnesiac. Sorry about that." I'm an idiot. Uhm, try suggestions, maybe teach her how to style it? Let's start simple. "Well, while I'm at it, you want me to do anything special with your hair? Tie it in a bun, leave it plain, braid it?"

She shakes her head in decline, still obvious nervous about it. "I'd prefer my usual style, thank you. Those styles seem to be begging for a mess..."

Ungh. I see her point. Well, I might as well do as she asked. "Only if you're bad at this. No problem, I can do this. Here you go!" How does this work again? Oh, that's how. Okay! Double buns. Damn, her hair's longer than I thought. I finish and hold up her mirror so she can examine my handiwork.

A pleased smile stretches across her face. "Thank you, Shanzira." She lowers the mirror. "I'd never have guessed you were so skilled at hairstyling." Is she asking for tips? Eh? I _LOVE_ TEACHING!

Delighted, I smile as I continue conversing. "It requires a little bit of artistic sense to pick out a good style, and that is something I have plenty of. But," here I frown a little in though, "I swear a ponytail would suit you better. Would certainly be easier to draw..." Oh, gods, it would be. Having a hairstyle like that myself, I know how to draw one.

She pauses and glances at me warily. "You draw me?"

Mm-hmm. "I draw all of the Shepherds. You guys are fun to doodle, and all the guys are eye candy." Oh, gods, that makes me think of Gaius. His theme song is Candyman by Christina Aguilera, end of story. Even better for the suggestive theme. I should try dating him.

"Eye candy?" Robin's confused tone brings me back out of la-la land.

I raise up my index fingers to punctuate this. "They. Look. Sexy. I admit, looks aren't the way to my heart, but having hot guys around is never bad." Gaius, Frederick, Stahl, who else...?

One eyebrow raised in serious concern, the amnesiac asks, "may I ask how much time you spend thinking about men?"

Uhm... "... I have no clue. A lot? I'm lonely." Couldn't be more honest there. I just... Hng. Hnnnnnnngggggg. Gaiusssssssss.

"Well," she begins gingerly, "perhaps you wouldn't be if you bothered to comb your hair into a nicer style?"

She really just said that? _Robin,_ rude?

I hold my words for a moment to give her a good perspective on how appalling that was. "That was low, Robin. Any guy worth his salt knows that looks aren't everything." Besides, it would be a pain in the ass to comb my hair like that. I mean, I've done it a few times for special occasions– senior prom, for example, I looked like a goddamn princess– but everyday? No. Not on your life, unless I was in a really good mood or I had a crush on someone.

Robin gingerly pats my shoulder. "I'm sorry, Shanzira. I didn't mean to put it so rudely." Siggghhhhh.

Better reassure her. "Apology accepted. If you'd really offended me," I add with a nasty grin, "you'd know."

She shudders. "Do I want to know?"

I pick up my parchments, a horrible idea popping into my head for revenge. "No, you don't." I exit the pantry, swiping some bread while I'm at it. Oh, this is going to be good. I go to my room, hastily sketch a rather... incriminating sketch of Robin and Chrom, then exit. That was once my OTP. I mean, I still ship it– which is amazing, I'm not much for shipping– but better and more lovable pairings have appeared in my life. For anyone who played the Tellius series, Geoffrey and Elincia are the cutest. Don't ask about Ike, he's not shippable at all. Yawn!

Speaking of knights and princesses, I see Lissa chatting with Frederick. What's she want– training? OH GODS. SHANZ, GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE BEFORE YOU GO PAST THE EVENT HORIZON. Do NOT get sucked into a training session with Frederick, there is no going back!

Okay. Okay. My room. I've skedaddled back to my room. Should be safe.

I should do more on that sketch. Hee hee. Robin, you will rue the day you said something so low... But I probably won't use this as leverage, I'll just hide it and giggle at it.

When I start yawning again, I put away my ink, parchment, and quill. Overall, this was a good day.

When do I ever _not_ have a good day?

* * *

I wake up in my dorm and laze around for a bit. "That was a good sleep." Everything's dark, since I haven't opened my eyes, but the red of light going through my eyelids indicates that Nin's got the lights on.

I hear her voice, too, and fingers clacking against a keyboard. "I had just thought your sleeping schedule had gone back to normal, too. Oh well." That was probably accompanied by a shrug.

I sit up, open my eyes, and stretch. "I'm not complaining, that was a gooooood dream." (I yawned in the middle of "good".) Okay, on your feet, Shanz.

"I take it you're feeling better, then?" Nin turns her chair around to face me, but her eyes stare past me, at the wall, as always. It's funny, talking to Aspies. And this is part of why she's my friend. I wonder if she'd believe me if I told her about my dreams?

"Much better." I pull my clean clothes-pile over towards me, and rifle through it for a good shirt. "And don't we have class today?" I glance at my desk, still covered in pens, knick-knacks, and clay.

Nin swivels her chair back around. "Yes, we do. You might want to make sure all your work is done." At that, she points her thumb towards the mountain of clutter in front of my computer.

I pull on a triforce shirt and grope around for my boots and green skinny jeans. "It is, I already made sure of that last night. Whoo..."

This is going to be a good week, I think. A very good week. I get to march to Regna Ferox– Oh, fuck. I get to march, with my crappy feet, in boots, for hours on end, to a land of _snow,_ with a still-mending collarbone.

Shit.

* * *

**THERE YOU HAVE IT. That is how the fic will continue. Seriously, why would I develop Shanzira's character so much only to kill her off without any warning? I should like to think I'm better at writing than that.**

**Also, yes, that was a support conversation between Shanz and Robin. That's my next project: A FULL SUPPORT LOG FOR DAYDREAMS AND NIGHTMARES! You guys should totally REQUEST SUPPORTS! YEAH! There are some I'll write/post anyways, regardless of whether they're requested or not. I'm going to write out all of them, even the S supports. After you guys read 'em, maybe you can vote on who you think each character should marry. However, it doesn't matter what you guys say– the decisions have already been made. I'm not overhauling my shipping chart again. But it will affect whose supports you get to read first. I hope you had fun reading this chapter!**

**EDIT: This is insanely important, guys– I need a volunteer for a male character who marries Anna, who doesn't mind me fucking around with their personality and side-plots. Need said volunteer before I can write chapter seven. Sorry for the delay!**


	7. Funny Changes

**Author's notes: After a long week of procrastination, I deliver unto thee this chapter. I rewrote the script for it once, and kept revising as I added prose. Needed to make it flow more. Got most of it done today. I'll start on the script for chapter eight once I'm not feeling sleepy.**

**In other news, the lack of volunteers is disheartening. As I said on my profile, I'm not asking for characters, I'm asking for people who want to be inserted in. If worse comes to worst, I'll just grab someone I know and be all "Hey, you wanna be in my self-insert fic? It's not gonna suck. And since I'm in the mood to overhaul my shipping chart, who d'you wanna marry?"  
Or I could scrap this and a few other characters altogether. HEY GUYS COME ON HELP A GIRL OUT. I was planning on throwing both Morgans into this, but to balance out the gender ratio, I might have to scrap poor F!Morgan.**

**Announcements over. You may resume reading the fic normally. Enjoy! :D**

* * *

It's really hard to march when two entirely different parts of your body are in serious pain.

I'm not kidding. My collarbone still hasn't mended and my feet kind of suck for marching. Now, my feet hurting is something normal. The damn collarbone isn't. I am not accustomed to a stinging pain in my chest that worsens with every step.

Suck it up, Shanz, keep fucking walking. Gods, I could use some water right about now. Or chocolate. Or really, candy in general.

I really should try dating Gaius... I could get all the candy I want. I cannot wait until we recruit him. Oh crap, I'm about to start daydreaming I REGRET NOTHING!

Gaius giving me chocolates. Gaius in candy-themed swim trunks. Gaius with a shit-eating grin.

Smack.

Thank you, Shio, for snapping me out of it. I nod my head towards her in gratitude and raise a hand to physically wipe the grin off my face.

"What were you even smiling about?" She asks me, utterly bewildered. She has a point; normally I'd be dying of foot torture and thus frowning.

"A certain candy thief who I should probably date." The hilarious thing is that Shio married him in one or a few of her playthroughs. Me? I stuck with Chrom and messed around with Frederick.

How did that song go again? "You can even marry Harry... But mess around with Ike! And that's good, isn't it grand, isn't it great, isn't it swell, isn't it fun, isn't it... Nowadays..." Chicago was such a good show. I should watch the movie sometime again, it had a great score.

Shio's shocked tone snaps me out of my thoughts again. "You were daydreaming about Gaius?!"

"Yeah, and? He's hot. Not too buff, and he can be really sweet, no pun intended, and his attitude is really charming. Although the thought that he took Chrom to a brothel in the Japanese version of their supports is a little disturbing, I admit." I probably shouldn't say that too loud– Two of Chrom's possible wives are nearby, after all. Actually, the idea of Robin marrying Chrom, and then said supports happening after the marriage is... Oh, damn, that's funny.

Wow. Didn't think I'd be _grateful_ that I can't marry him. I regret nothing, not even hypocrisy!

"I still wish I could've found that Tumblr post," she sighs.

"I could dig around in my likes and show you later," I suggest. (I stalk the Fire Emblem tag, shut up.)

"What are you two talking about?" The sound of Robin totally bewildered is an amusing one. I have to stop myself from snickering, because let's face it, this cliche of self-inserts making references to their reality is _much_ funnier when you live it.

My chuckle shows through my answer. "It's just a popular thing from back home. Shio and I come from a weird place." WHOOPS TRY NOT TO TRIP, SHANZ. Phew. Okay, didn't twist my ankle. Unfortunately, Shio isn't so lucky– she falls over a rock and her face meets the fresh earth. "Shit!" I pick her up and examine her front for injury. "You okay?"

"Can we stop and rest?" She sighs. Well, she doesn't look hurt. I brush a bit of dirt off of her and pull her to her feet. Oh, Shio.

You'd think it would've been Sumia who would've tripped first, but no, it was Shio. The trip-o-holic offer her advice: "No, we have to keep going, Shio. But don't worry about it, you'll be fine."

I nod impatiently. "Tough it out, you guys. I have a broken collarbone and I'm still ahead of you all." Trufax, by the way. I've been leading our little group of four. Bet my parents would once again remark at my resilience. I can do amazing things when I want to. This potential lead my dad to push me as hard as he could, and because of this, my relationship with him got a little strained. I'm still always surprising everyone, though.

Like now, Shio in this example. "Wouldn't you normally be complaining about your feet by this point?" And she brings up an earlier point at the same time.

"These are my hiking boots, love. I can walk in 'em." The smallest boots I own, and the most comfortable as well. Size five. I'm a size four, but size four boots would hurt like hell. (Yeah, I have tiny feet.)

Shio's reply comes flatly. "You complained about them every time you wore them to Fanime." Who are you, my mother?

"Only when I was overburdened!" I squawk. Oh gods, this one Fanime, a few years ago, I had to sling all my stuff over my shoulder using my prop sword to carry it all. Had to head home early because I was in so much pain. The next few days, however, had been surprisingly easy, probably because I didn't bring the copic markers. "Now, I only have my spear and the contents of my pockets. Nothing to load up my arms." Well, except for the spear, and that's easily handled. Gods, I love this thing! I've always loved sp–

"... "Fanime"?" Oh, shit. Better answer Sumia's inquiry.

Shio starts off stumbling, not knowing how to answer. "Oh... Um..."

Now engaging RP mode. "It's a carnival of sorts that comes 'round our hometown every now and then. It's a celebration of the arts. As an artist, it's like candyland to me." Wow! I'm getting really good at this half-truth stuff! What else shall I have to bullshit in the future? Go on, guys, test me.

"Ah, I see," says an understanding Robin. Hah, no you don't. You're probably imagining a traditional carnival. "What manner of things might one do there?"

And there's my next BS test. "Well, there are plenty of games– There's this really fun one called Ninja, I should teach it to you all– and there's a form of chess where people are the pieces." Cosplay chess. "Human chess. I've either been a queen or a pawn in the past, and I'm pretty good with both." Playing the queen in my Robin cosplay was the best thing ever. Getting to shout her quips while slaughtering people is great. 'Here's how it's done!' Goodbye, pawn! 'Checkmate!' Just took the king! But, seriously, I need to resume my exposition. "But what I spend most of my time there doing is buying, selling, and admiring artwork." I've gotten a booth there once or twice. Truthfully, I prefer roaming.

Sumia jumps up excitedly, nearly tripping over herself in the process. "That sounds like fun!"

Robin nods in agreement. "I'd like to see your work sometime."

Chuckle. "Sorry, my sketchbook's in the convoy." I learned my lesson, do not overburden your arms. Wish I had a backpack, though.

I hear Shio's footsteps as she trots up to clarify something. "Wait, when did you get a new sketchbook?"

Oh, yeah, I never explained that. I went into town a couple days back, with Sumia and Robin, to help manage equipment. I owe Robin ten gold for it. "I got it– FUCKING SHIT YOU GUYS, RISEN AHEAD." CRAPPITY CRAP CRAP, YEP, THAT'S A REVENANT ATOP THAT HILL.

"R-Risen?!" Squawks the future pegasus knight.

Robin nearly drops all her stuff in panic. "What? Here?! Everyone, get into formation! Sumia, protect the convoy!" She readjusts everything, taking her time. I can only assume she's thinking, and thinking quickly.

"Y–yes, ma'am!" And miraculously, Sumia does not trip as she runs off to the conv– oh, wait, she tumbled right into it. Damn.

I turn round to face Robin. "And me, O great tactician?"

Her everyday things fall into her pockets and she whips out her thunder tome. "Just wait a minute, I'm working it out!" Her inventory sorted, she lays a hand on the pommel of her sword and draws herself up, almost regally, to give commands. Robin turns around to face the rest of the company, who, having either noticed the Risen or heard the command, have come together. "Shio, with Stahl! He can defend while you strike!"

My best friend trots over to the resident overeater. "Nice to be working with you," I catch her mumbling.

Stahl shrugs in response. "Same here, I guess."

I keep listening, waiting for my orders. "Vaike, fight with Sully, and watch yourself! You'll be at the van!"

Mr. Shirtless Scene nods and raises his axe up proudly. "No problem! Don't slow me down, Sully!" I really should forgive his hubris, but if only he weren't so stupid to go along with it...

Sully snorts. "As if you were better than me!" She readies her lance, nearly smacking Vaike in the face with the butt. Nice butt-spike there, Sully. Heh.

"Lissa, with Frederick, on the left flank!" Please tell me I'm on the right flank.

Lissa jumps up, then chirps as she runs to Frederick. "All right!"

He offers a hand to help her atop his horse. "Working together again, milady." UNF. Shanz, get your mind out of the gutter, NOW! Doesn't make me stop wishing I were Lissa! FUCK!

Robin gives out yet more commands, thankfully snapping me out of it. "Virion, fight with Miriel, and for the love of the gods, restrain your tongue!" When the hell am I getting _my_ orders?!

"Perhaps a strike from behind the front lines might be most advantageous," Miriel suggests to Virion. Oh, wow. Two blabbermouth geniuses stuck together. How are they not shippable again?

With a cheerful, puffy sigh, Virion draws himself up as he always does to flirt. "Ah, sound strategem! I shall be sure to mark with my arrows the strongest of targets to bring down to more quickly assure victory." Despite myself, I keep thinking he might be dateable as well. NO, STOP THINKING THAT WAY, SHANZ! GODS DAMN IT!

"Kellam, protect Shanzira, make sure she doesn't get hurt, and stay at the right flank!" I raise up my head, having heard my name. Right flank, away from Frederick? Got it, phew. With... Kellam? How did I get stuck with the most boring guy in the Shepherds?!

I groan, but I don't voice that particular complaint. "Aw, shit. Okay." This might be a boon, anyways. Didn't I resolve to myself that I'd try not to fall in love with these assholes? Damn, I've got my work cut out for me.

"And Chrom, you'll be with me!" Aww, why can't I be with Chrom? I'm pretty sure I'd be safest next to hi– waaaaaiiit a minute, she paired me with Kellam to better defend me. Fucking genius! I love you, Robin! You really do want to keep me alive!

"Fine by me," I hear Chrom reply, as though he's slightly disappointed. Huh? What, did he want to work with Sumia? Sorry, but she's not joining the battle just yet.

I roll my neck around, cracking the muscles as I trot over to the right flank. "Kellam, where are you? ... Oh, hell, I'll just trust that you're nearby, I can't even see you anyways."

"That would seem to be for the best!" HOLY SHIT HE'S RIGHT FUCKING BEHIND ME OH MY GODS. You know how all the guys, especially Frederick, are really good at sneaking up behind me and surprising me? Kellam could make them all_ shit their pants_. Or pantaloons, as these guys like to say. They have amusing jargon. 'Smallclothes.' Really?

"Well, uh." Groping for words, don't mind me. "I'll just try and stay by the flank." I ready my spear and look to the Risen ahead. They're mostly heading to crash into the vanguard, haha, sucks for them. Chrom, Robin, Sully, and Vaike know what they're doing. Oh, wait, we have a few stragglers. Great. Okay, cool. How do I kill Risen again? Shit, I just remembered, Risen are harder to kill than the living. Fuck! Okay, relax, I have Kellam on my side. He'll be my invisible shield.

Impale a myrmidon. A fighter drops to the ground, I assume because Kellam killed it. Butt-spike a soldier, stab in the foot, then stab in the chest. It's down. Duck beneath a hand axe, charge up a few feet, stab offending fighter in the knee, stab in the neck. Down. Charge a soldier. spears trapped against each other, haft on haft. Now what did my tutors always say? "If you're staring at the ground, charge!" CHAAAARGE! Knocked him off his feet, rush forward, impale! And he dissipates into black fog.

Oh, gods. I ran ahead. Fuck. KELLAM! I run back and stop. I'm penned in, great. Turn around? Shit, I really am stuck. Three risen surrounding me. This is just like that one velociraptor comic on xkcd– HEAD BACK IN THE GAME, YOU NEVER EVEN SOLVED THAT PROBLEM. okay, face the nearest, raise spear, and try to block that really big axe! "Oh crap oh crap OH CRAP–"

Wait, why's everything so bright? REALLY BRIGHT LIGHT AAAH– Oh, it faded. Wait, where'd all the Risen go? Light magic? Wait, I'm in a different place. "What the fuck–?"

"Return to your friends. Make haste." I twist around. Holy shit, who's this robed lady, and why is her voice so ridiculously high pitched? It's not like she's distorting it, but here's a first soprano (Like me, but I'm not nearly this noticeable) if I ever heard one. Lemme describe this lady real quick: I can't actually see her face; she's got a dragon mask and a hood. Actually, the mask looks not unlike one I made back in high school, and it's leather, like that one, and based off an eastern dragon. But the coloration is different– this one's green, the original was teal, and it's got feather whiskers at the snout. As for the robe, it's a brilliant emerald green with gold lining. It's quite fair to my eyes, but eerily familiar. It looks like something I might have designed.

"Who are you?" She's wearing an outfit that suits my fashion styling, this question is more than warranted. Ah, in her hand, she's holding a Rescue staff. So she did save me. Okay.

Her voice doesn't change in tone, and I can't notice anything about her face behind that damn mask. "A guardian." And with that, she raises a hand up and send a blast of wind magic– Arcwind, if I'm not wrong– past my shoulder. A myrmidon is sent flying back, and it turns into wispy dust before it could hit the ground. "Go, now."

I am genuinely impressed. This is the kind of awesome I want to be. "Holy shit... Umm, thanks!" I point my thumb back to where the Shepherds are, just a little west of here. "Mind escorting me back? I can't afford to get scratched!" This comes out with a nervous grin.

She places the Arcwind inside her coat and fumbles in it a little more. "I'm aware of your condition, madam. I can defend you from a distance." Oh, what's she pulling from her pocket– Oh my gods, it's a Blizzard tome. They only had those in the Tellius series!

"Holy moly. Glad you're on our side!" I turn and run, trusting my back to her. If she's got a Blizzard, I'm sure I'm fine. She's probably fast enough to double attack with it. When I rejoin the right flank, Kellam is nowhere to be seen, but Robin storms up to me angrily.

Indignantly, she screeches, "why did you break formation, Shanzira?!"

I glance around, and I see no Risen too close by. So, I can converse. "Wasn't my fault! Got Rescued!" I point my thumb eastward, towards the "guardian."

Robin's eyebrows tilt upwards in confusion. "A rescue staff? But who–"

Shit, more Risen coming. I cut Robin off. "I'll explain later, but she saved my life!"

She glances, sees the Risen, and nods at me. "Very well, then. Stay with me and Chrom!"

I could almost jump up happily. "Got it!" I have GOT to stop favoring Chrom like this. I take position on his left side, so as to avoid his sword range, and give him a cordial greeting. "Glad to be fighting with you again, boss!"

"How is it you always wind up alone on the battlefield?!" I think he's frustrated. Yeah, frustrated. I bet I'm not a very good soldier. But this time wasn't my fault, I swear! I'd have been in better luck if I'd been with someone other than Kellam.

"I wasn't paying much attention, sir! I'll put in better effort from now on, sir, don't worry!" I'm too accustomed to offense. I should just wait for the Risen to come to me instead of rushing out to meet them. Ugh. Hey, now's a good chance! Just got to get him within my rea– and then Chrom kills it before I get a chance. That's why I'm so offensive, I realize, it's because my range is excessively short. "Sir, would you mind giving me a chance?"

"Hm?" He turns round and sees me standing almost frustratedly, bent over with my spear dangling from my fingers. "Oh. My apologies. I didn't realize you couldn't participate."

I snort and resume my battle posture. "'Swhy I keep running ahead, on the offensive. Damn, I need to learn patience." Oh, look, a revenant for me to kill! STABBY MCSTAB STAB! Wow, I didn't know I could stab so fast. Did I just level up? ... Stop it, Shanz. I'm worse than Owain.

"Good kill," Chrom compliments. "Robin, there's just one left. How do you want to finish it?"

Robin hums thoughtfully. "Hmm, it has a hand axe... I think you and Kellam and kill it easily enough. And perhaps I should have Shio and Stahl help..."

Wait, bosses give more experience. "What about me?!" I almost shouted "waterboat me?!" instead. Oh, Meenah... Best troll, I swear. I still say "Adorabubble" instead of "adorable". Gotten flack from my dad for it. Fish puns.

Robin glances at me. "Yes, perhaps you can help, too. I'll have you finish him. All right, attack in this order: Frederick, Chrom, and Shanzira!"

Welp, if Frederick's involved, it's dead in three fights or less. He rushes ahead, deals considerable damage– all the while looking as dashing as he possibly can, damn him– then Chrom has his round, and I run up to have a hack at it.

"You just looove showing off, don't you?!" I shout at Frederick on the way.

"Yes, he does!" Lissa pipes from behind him, riding sidesaddle on his horse.

"Hmph!" I turn my neck around, twirl my spear, raise it, and throw it at the last Risen. I hit; it seems a hit to the gut was sufficient to finish it off. Great. I think I can wield iron weapons now, if weapons levels are a– STOP IT STOP IT! Besides, cast iron is heavy as shit. Ugh.

I'm quite happy with myself. I thought I'd have to be a pure mage, but I'm not bad with a spear. Sweet. I hear footsteps and I turn to see Robin approaching me. She looks... befuddled. This is just a day for everyone to be confused, isn't it? She opens her mouth to ask me a question, and I believe I know what she's going to ask, so I preempt her.

"A woman in a dragon mask saved my ass by pulling me out of there at the last second. I didn't break formation, Robin, not intentionally." Why is it always my first instinct to say "It's not my fault"?

She folds her arms, pensive. "... A dragon mask. Curious, to say the least."

I nod in agreement, and there's a beat. Awkward pause. "... Sadly, I know nothing about her. She was really cryptic. Told me she was "a guardian"." It's like some cliched video game or something, _waaaaaiiit a minute._

Joke's over now, back to reality.

Robin nods and points her thumb backwards. "You've earned a ride in the convoy, Shanzira. Go ahead and rest." MY FUCKING ANGEL! ROBIN, DID I EVER TELL YOU THAT I LOVE YOU?

"Thanks!" I run towards the wagon and hop in. Sweetness! I don't care about the clutter– holy shit, I nearly stabbed myself, who left their sword here in the open? Sigh. Well, I'll just kinda burrow into a spot that's weapons-free and just... curl up? Hm. Hey, I could totally play on my 3DS. I shall do so. I need another refresher, anyways. I pull the thing from my pocket and crack it open.

Aw, damn. Looks like my files were erased. Okay, no prob– what the fuck happened to my support log? I spent... hours... days... getting that support log... and it's... Gone. Mother_fucker!_

I have to stop myself from screaming that.

I'll just... kinda... start a new file. Robin, white hair, mid build, yadda yadda yadda. Premonition, yeah intense fight scene, Chrom dies, Robin wakes up in a field, gets escorted until Lissa sees Southtown burning and freaks out, they run in, and Robin's all like "ILL HLEP DURHURHUR" (stupid accent done for comedic purposes), okay, let's see about killing those two brigands. Lissa, sit outside their attack zone.

Wait a minute, who the fuck is that green unit on the east wide of town? And apparently it's being chased by a brigand. Haha, sucker. Better go save it– Wait. Is that me? Yeah, that's me! Drawn in the same damn art style!

"Welp, there's a first time for everything," comes the voiced quip. The script afterwards is as follows: "First life taken in about a minute..."

This is uncannily accurate. The brigand chases her, initiates a fight. She– I? ... I dodge, and then critical him, and he disappears from the map. After this, the "other phase" goes, and... I... hesitate through some dialogue– "I should probably help out..." and I run towards the fight. Umm, I should have someone talk to her. Chrom can talk to her, okay. Let's see how this script goes!

Chrom: Hm? Are you fighting the brigands?

Shanzira: Um, yes, I am. Are you who I think you are?

Chrom: Yes, I'm Chrom. And your name is?

Shanzira: ... Shanzira. (It's not my real name, but...) Okay, I have a little deal for you– I'll help you clear out these brigands, and you make me feel safe! Sound good?

Chrom: Very well, then. I'll be counting on you.

And then it cuts to just Shanzira, talking to herself.

Shanzira: Wow! This is some dream I'm having... My subconscious is getting this mostly perfect. It's better than being hypnotized.

Wow, okay, this is weird. I'm in the game. And it got my personality exactly right, I think. I need to show this to Shio. Wait, let me check my class... "Dreamer." "A wanderer existing in two realms, who wields whatever first two convenient weapons." Wait, what are my weapon levels? Just E in spears, okay... Um. What's my flavor text say? "A wanderer with a childish streak. Affectionate when not shy." Damn, perfect. Uhh. I should... Probably... Level myself up. Yeah. Don't want to die, after all. Let's go. How's the script get altered?

...

Fuckers. It's exactly as I remember it going in real life, just with different voice acting (Voice clips as opposed to fully voiced everything). This is almost fun to watch.

Oh, wait, wow, it even has me falling asleep! Although, I fall asleep in town, but hey, this is still funny. What about the bear meat scene– Oh, wait, for chapter one, it has Frederick leading his horse, which I'm slumped over. So that's how that happened! Okay. And once the campfire happens, I'm curled up by it, and Robin makes a remark about my odd sleeping habits.

And then I wake up and have a brief dialogue with Chrom, who was already awake and watching the fire. I don't really remember how that conversation went– I was half asleep, cut me some slack!– but this seems to be spot-on.

I play this chapter, and it goes normally as far as gameplay goes, then I save and put away my 3DS.

I'm in a copy of the game.

I wonder how this is going to turn out.

I glance outside the convoy wagon. The sun's setting, which means, at this time of year, I'm not far from falling asleep. I make myself comfortable amidst the weapons, and greet my college dorm.

I sit up with a yawn, grateful for the shadowy dawn darkness of the dormitory. "Gods," I mumble to myself.

"You said "gods" as in plural." I jump. Whoops, I forgot you'd be there, Ninny. Derp derp. Need to excuse myself.

"Did I now? Whoops..." There's a lengthy, awkward pause. I scratch my head, then sit up and start putting some proper clothes on. While I'm pulling a belt through the loops in my jeans, I say conversationally, "got my head stuck back in Awakening."

I take note of her, sitting at the computer, not looking at me, as she customarily does. "So I've noticed."

I briefly ponder upon the aptness of what I just said. Boy, _did_ I...

* * *

**Aaaaand did you enjoy those two plot twists? I thought this was turning out to be a lengthy chapter, so I considered putting off the "I'm in the game holy shit" plot twist until next chapter, until I realized it wouldn't take up much space.  
To clarify: Shanzira is in the copy of the game which exixts in Ylisse. The one she has in California is normal. The purpose for the in-game one is to provide a lens through which one might see the alternate scripts. (Whoo, this is going to be ****_fun_****.)**

**If you want to volunteer to be in the fic, PM me and ask for a form to fill out. Sadly, I'm only accepting guys. ****_OR_****, ladies, you could submit a genderbend of yourself. Hee.**

**EDIT: Since people keep asking me, I'm not taking volunteers anymore. I only accepted one! He's already been introduced anyways, if you keep reading. Sorry!**


	8. I'm Too Self-Aware Sometimes

**Author's notes: This wound up being excessively long, I'm sorry. On the other hand, I did my best to pack it with quality material, so... Yum yum, fun. Lots of references to other works here, and I threw in a recap for Shanz because her memory sucks.**

**Oh, and we have a few running gags introduced here. Remember Rule number One, it's important. (and hilarious. Best rule ever.)**

* * *

"WHY IS IT SO FUCKING COLD?!"

I exaggerate not. It literally IS freezing, there's snow everywhere, it's sticking to my damn boots I DID NOT KNOW SNOW WOULD BE STICKY FUCK IT. My coat, my poor coat, it's going to be sopping wet by the time we reach the longfort, and I don't want to fight in wet clothes. Uggghhhh.

Shio, trudging beside me, takes the time to answer my rhetorical question. Man, we must be bored. "Because we're up north and it's snowing?"

I take a sigh, shivering as the chill air stabs the insides of my lungs. "Yes, but oh my gods, I never knew snow could be so cold..." My thoughts turn back to that adorable pegasus in its remotely warm environment. "Sumia, you lucky bitch, you get to lag behind and take care of a cute animal."

"Would you like me to get you another coat?"

I love my best friend. Sure, she's a little obsequious, but she saves my ass in times like these. You know, those times that never happen where I'm freezing it off. It's with great gratitude that I nod and affirm, "Yes, that might do me some good." PLEASE SHIO, SAVE ME.

"All righty then." Shio jogs a little to the back and the right to where the convoy wagon is and walks alongside it for a minute or so. Afterwards, she returns, a great big bundle of fur in her arms. What a lifesaver. "Robin seems to have quite a few of these in the convoy."

Hastily, I don the coat over my original tactician's coat. (I need a name for it. Fellcoat? That would be badass. Except it's spoilery to everyone else, damn it. Robin's Hood? ... PUNS! I'll have to remember that. Where are my mental notes when I need them?) "Thank you, Shio, you're the best friend ever."

Shio jokingly salutes at me. "Is there anything else you need, my lord?"

TELL ME SHE DID NOT JUST MAKE THAT JOKE IN FRONT OF THE SHEPHERDS. This is an old in-joke of ours, because she's so happy to be my servant, we say that... Oh, hell. I should just cover it up and be done with it. Inhale– damn that's cold– and yell while appearing to laugh, "OH ARE WE GOING WITH THIS GAG AGAIN?!" Although it strikes me that my alarm is a little obvious.

"Of course we are, my lord." She cracks a grin while cracking wise. I resist the urge to hide my face in embarrassment.

Lowering my voice to a panicked hiss, I say, "perhaps not the wisest gag in present company?!"

She smile slides off her face like... Hot water on an icicle. Well, that's not a good one. Um, she sobers up real quick, like a Lalonde who just got killed. "Oh. Right."

Robin trots up to us in a fur coat similar to mine, apparently having handed off her convoy-guarding job to someone. (Upon closer look, it's Stahl. He's got a loaf of bread in one hand, the horses' reins in the other.) "What gag?" Too late.

"Oh, um," this is a hard one to cover up, godsdammit. Thank god I'm good at improvising. "Sometimes we like to joke that Shio's the Frederick to my Chrom." Robin and Sully chuckle at this.

Sully's the one who asks, "so that means you're really obsequious?" Wow, using the same word as me. Sweet. (By the way, Sully's on a horse. The lucky bitch... I want a mount. (Take that any way you like.))

There's a pause, and I think I know why. I explained this word to Shio four years ago when it popped up in Radiant Historia (excellent game, by the way, everyone should get it), and I bet she forgot. "What does "obsequious" mean?" Knew it.

"Servile," I explain. I wish everyone had a memory like mine.

She looks from side to side, redfaced and shuffling her feet more in her gait. "No, I'm not..." She pauses, unable to find words in her awkwardness. "It's a joke, I'm not that much like a servant."

I grin evilly and decide to worsen her situation. "Butler best friend."

Indignant: "HEY!" (So. Worth. It.)

I pat her shoulder, chuckling mischievously. "You asked for it, love. Hey," I look around with a smile, inspired, "since we're in snow, why don't we have a snowball fight?"

"A snowball fight?" That was Robin's voice. I turn to regard her and see her tilting her head curiously.

I can't believe it. "You've never been in a snowball fight?" Nor have I! Snow-less buddies, YES! Whoo! Robin, I love you. I can teach you something and learn it at the same time.

She shakes her head slowly, like I'm stupid or something. "... No. What does it entail?"

I receive a sharp Gibbs-style slap to the back of the head. "She has amnesia, you arse!" That was Sully?! She knows about the Gibbs slap?! But more importantly, how did I forget our tactician is an amnesiac?!

"Oh, shit, right." I slap my forehead hard. Wow, what a derp, that was almost as bad as this morning, when I went to search for the convoy and couldn't find it until Chrom showed it to me in front of my tent. And then, I proceeded to walk away having forgotten my damn wind tome. Well, better teach Robin about snowball fights. "You throw snowballs at each other and make forts to defend yourselves from it. Easy as that."

"That sounds fun, except we're marching." My hand twitches as though to move to my forehead with all possible haste, but I hold it back. I can turn this around.

"Then, when we stop marching, we'll have to have one. Here's hoping we reach a town soon!" I finish this cheerily, hoping I've saved my apparent IQ from another nosedive.

"Actually, our next stop is the longfort." So much for trying to be smart. Whoops! Time for that head slap.

Wait a minute. Fuck. I have a few hours to prepare for our next fight. "Oh. Well then." That came out as a mumble, but it seems Robin heard it anyways.

She looks sideways at me, a weird look on her face. "Something wrong?"

I throw up my facade again, donning a wide grin. "Oh, nothing. It'll be fine. Hey," I droop my smile slightly to appear less carefree, "may I take a rest in the convoy wagon?" I point my thumb backwards to the _very fucking wagon I could not find earlier despite it being right in front of my tent_– oh wow I need to shut up about that.

Robin narrows her eyes, the way she does when she's thinking strategy. Uh-oh, that means I'm in hot water. Robin, we're friends, right? Gimme a rest, I beg you! Please! After a nerve-wracking pause, she breathes in and says, "very well. Go ahead."

I LOVE YOU ROBIN THANK YOU! "Whoohoo!" I run off to the convoy and hop in, trying not to kick Stahl in the face as I do so. "'Scuse me, takin' a rest!" I curl up in the same corner as before and find, to my delight, less pointy things nearby it. Good, less chance of killing myself. I glance out the front of the wagon; Stahl's busy directing the horses, so I pull out my earbuds, thread them through my shirt to hide them, and hit shuffle for my "favorites" playlist on my iPod. "Love So Blue" from Blazblue...? Nah. I know, let's do Condemnation Wings, the vocal version. AWWHHHH YEAH. Must resist urge to headbang! But REALLY GOOD MUSIC!

I take another glance towards the front of the wagon. Stahl's still busy. Okay. I pull out my 3DS. Since this copy of Awakening seems to reflect the reality I'm in, I should play it as much as I can to find out what I can. Okay, firing it up. ... Hey, Shio and I are in the opening, and if I'm not wrong, there are... Four others. Can't see them well AW COME ON SHOW ME THEM AGAIN fuck. Well, I'm pretty sure one of them was Welsh, he said he's here. Welp, better start playing, I only have so much battery.

The shenanigans I remember going down while we were in Ylisstol certainly do happen, but I don't remember the whole swearing-at-Virion-in-French thing happening IN Ylisstol, I'm pretty sure it happened on the way there. And the conversation Robin had with me where she asked about my coat was certainly left in; if I wrote the script for this, I'd leave it in as an important foreshadowing about the dreamers. I like to think I'm a good writer, but I can only believe that for so long before I worry about hubris happening.

Oh, yeah, that's right, I was there for the Emmeryn introduction thingy. I don't remember blurting out like an idiot back then! The game's exaggerating! Augh... This is embarrassing. Knowing me, I probably did do that and promptly forgot about it. Sigh. Embarrassed by my own game. Wow. Okay, let's have a look at the ma– wait, chapter two was supposed to happen at the Northroad, and I don't remember the Shepherds' barracks being on the map at all. Support conversations unlocked, but no supports to read... "Chapter Two: Cumulating Dreams"... Okay, then, we go to the barracks, I run off into gods-knows-where (the pantry, if memory serves), while Lissa introduces Robin to everyone. Yadda yadda yadda... Nightfall... I run into the foyer, judging from my face, I'm sleepy. Wait a second, this fight is in the game? What the fuck? Okay, um, I guess I get to see it from Robin's point of view.

Looks like I picked up tomes in my weapon levels, okay. So I'm equipped with a bronze lance– SPEAR, dumbasses! Lances are for horseback ONLY– and a wind tome. Okay. I'm up by Chrom, awww, I get to fight alongside him. Okay, let's play this shit. Wait, I can see who these guys are– what. Gods damn it, they're an unknown force. Fuckers. Okay, let's get on with this fight. (I hate not having that preparations screen! Ugh.)

...

Damn it, Sully, you were NOT supposed to die. I hate resetting. Okay, soft reset, go. (I kind of suck as a tactician.) Let's try this again, and let's be less offensive.

...

WHOO OKAY BEAT THE BOSS wait what, what's going on with this cut scene? Okay, I guess the Shio-hostage thing was a cut-scene. Damn. And there I go with my little "I'll be your captive if you let her go" dealie, he tries to lance me, I blast him back. Haha! Sucker. And then I collapse, wow, I'm such a wimp.

I feel along my collarbone, careful not to put any pressure on it. That's the fight in which it got injured. Shudder.

Save. Shio talks to me, we're both like "wow okay cool" about the whole thing, and back to the map. THERE'S THAT NORTHROAD FIGHT THINGY. Looks like that got bumped to being chapter three. Well, let's see, any supports? Huh, looks like I have one with Robin. Okay, I rea–

What the everliving fuck, this is that one conversation we had, where I taught her how to play with her hair, she was accidentally rude, and I exited with an evil giggle. Who am I, Tharja? Ugh. Well, I'll be sure to get all my supports once I beat this version of the game. All... That... Support grinding... Gods... My whole support log... Erased... NO GET OUT OF HELL SHANZ. Phew. Okay. Begin Northroad fight. Yadda yadda yadda, tutorial crap, oh look Shio's on the team, she's a Dreamer as well WHAT THE HELL SHE HAS SHADOWGIFT. BITCH! Wait, what's my starting skill? Paragon. Oh, wow, that explains why I'm level five while everyone else is levels one, two, or three. I should hang back a little.

Hm. Wait, Other Phase? So HOLY SHIT THE GUARDIAN'S ON HERE. And she just warped Shanz away from the rear guard that fucking moron. No, I don't want to be an experience hog! Ugh. Okay, let's have a look at my friendly guardian.

Class, Dreamer– wait, I thought she was a sage, what with that cloak. Umm, okay. Description: "An enigmatic mage who conceals herself behind a mask." Huh. And her skill is Shade. Well, I guess that fits WAIT A MINUTE ALL THE BAD GUYS WHO GO IN OUR DIRECTION ARE GONNA KILL ME. Fuck. Well, I'm level five, I can handle it. I'll just retrea–

...

Welp, so much for playing ahead. My 3DS just died. At least I saved after every chapter. I'll just cha– Wait. I have no charger. I... I can't play it unless I find a way to charge it. Find a way to charge it. Okay. I'll put it away. Right, I forgot, all my battery shit has limited life. How'd I forget that? Ugh. I grope around and find my wind tome, then stuff it into my cloak. Okay, I oughta be prepared for the longfort fight. I stop playing music from my iPod while I'm at it, and put it away. Sigh.

And I think Stahl wasn't paying attention to me, so I'm okay, I guess. Cool. I curl up into a comfortable sleeping position. Wait, I can't nap, I'll wake up in the other world. Um, I'll settle for one of those fake-naps I have. Where I curl up and pretend to sleep but I'm actually awake. (I did this a lot back in high school. Nobody believed that I had never fallen asleep in class, but it's true. Still haven't.) This is my version of a power nap...

Robin's curt voice stirs me. "Shanzira, get out of the convoy. We're preparing for battle."

I sit up straight, raise a hand in a salute, and shout, "yes, ma'am!" And then I jump right out of the wagon. Stahl's gone, no clue where he went. "What's wrong?" But I believe I already know the answer.

Robin shuffles through the weapons, not looking at me. "We're at the longfort, but the Feroxi guard are mobilizing."

"Oh boy," I yawn. I bend over, clasp my hands behind my back, and raise them as far up as I can (quite a ways). "Fun times. So what's our formation?"

She pulls out a fistful of vulneraries, stuffs them into her pocket, and raises her hands to point and gesture. "Our forces will be divided in two" she holds up two fingers, like I don't get it– "to storm the fort. Stahl, Vaike, Miriel, Chrom and I will be on the west side." She points to the left, er, my left. I'm facing north. "You, Shio, Frederick, Lissa, Sully, and Virion will storm the east." And her hand floats to my right. Ah, okay. I got it.

"You forgot Kellam," I point out. Everyone forgets Kellam. I would, too, except I'm making a point of remembering him. I'm noting him for his invisibility. I swear, the guy's an Heir of Void. Sigh.

Robin realizes her derp and blinks. "Oh. He'll be on my side, then." She shrugs. Haha, she doesn't like that she made that mistake. I'll try not to laugh at her for it.

"Well, I'll get into formation and spread the word." I start to walk away, smirking at this occurrence. Heh heh. I should spread around that artwork at some point. Maybe after this fight, I'll pin it into everyone's tents. I can't wait to see her reaction.

"Thank you!"

I find a rock to stand on and clear my throat. "ALL RIGHT, GUYS! I HAVE OUR ORDERS FROM ROBIN! YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU, AND YOU ARE ALL ON THE WEST SIDE! YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU, AND I ARE ON THE EAST! GOT IT?!" (I was pointing to everyone as I shouted this. I don't really feel a need to repeat exactly what Robin said, I have a thing against repetition.) Robin trots up as I step down and shout one last thing, for the purpose of raising morale: "AND REMEMBER GUYS, THE MOST IMPORTANT THING: RULE NUMBER ONE!"

Robin taps my shoulder. "What's rule number one?"

I turn to Shio, point at her, beckon, and then we both chirp the answer in unison: "Don't do anything stupid!"

The most important rule is also the most arbitrary rule. HA! It's a joke that's persisted for years. I intend to carry it well into my twilight years.

Hey, Sully got the joke! "Har! Good one! Now let's move!" She rides over by me and WHAT ARE YOU DOING GRABBING ME SULLY ABSHJKDBVSHJKBH PUT ME DOWN okay good that's much better oh gods Virion why.

"O fair lady!" He shouts, waving a hand over towards me when Sully puts me down. "What a beautiful day that sees the pair of us doing battle side by s–"

I interrupt him with a snort: "And a happy casse-toi to you too, Virion!" Beautiful day, my ass! We're in SNOW, you dumbass! Snow mixed with mud! That's not exactly pretty! Oh, I'm so glad I googled French swears.

He stops in place as though my words were a slap in the face. "Ugh..." What a theatrical frown he has on. I don't know whether I want to punch that face or make out with it as a joke. Probably punch. "Why such a cruel tongue..."

It seems I've put Sully is a really good mood; she's laughing at him. "Sucks for you, Ruffles!" With one hand on the reins of her horse, she points her lance at him and says, "_maybe_ you'll learn to keep your distance!"

Oh, hell. I've found me a new snark buddy. Time for a Severa-esque smirk (seriously, she has the best smirk ever, end of story). "These roses have thorns! _Lots_ of 'em!"

And then Frederick comes by on his big-ass horse (which is apparently female if I remember right) and ruins our fun. "As much as I appreciate the high morale, it would better befit the pair of you to keep more civil tongues." He fiddles around with his pockets, hardly appearing to pay attention to us, and I assume this is normal to him because he's just going on with his battle preparations like it's nothing.

I give him one loud PFFF. "Dude, we're hardly swearing at all!"

"Come on, Frederick," Sully chimes. "Sometimes a woman just needs to cuss like all hell!"

I don one of my patented evil grins and continue the joke. "Fuckin' shit, we do!"

The archest of archers turns and walks away from us, and I can imagine an anime-waterfall-tears face on him, oh man I need to draw that. "Excuse me while I attend to mine bleeding ears..."

"Oh, come on, Frederick, don't be an ass. A little bit of battlefield cursing never hurt anyone." What the– That– That was _Lissa?!_ LISSA, of all people SWORE?! LISSA, I LOVE YOU! You're a healer AND you have a sense of humor! This is better than hearing my dad swear!

And just like my dad would be, Frederick is shocked and promptly responds as though he's squawking (excuse me while I laugh my ass off): "You too, milady?!"

"Lissa!" I run over to her and give her a tight hug, actually lifting her off her feet (She's shorter than me! SHE'S SHORTER THAN ME!) "Welcome to the club of my best friends! I'm the chairwoman, and Shio here–" I wave my hand to the side– "is the vice presid– wait, where's Shio?" I look around for her, where's my best friend, I kinda need her–

She pops up where I'd waved my hand before, right on cue (or perhaps late for her cue). "Right here."

"Oh, there you are, I was worried for a moment there." Yeah, for like, one instant. Anyways, we're missing a bit of our orders, so I yell at our tactician. "OY ROBIN, WHO DO WE ALL PAIR UP WITH?!"

She turns to me, holds up her hands to throw her voice (meanwhile, Chrom bends over in an exaggerated cringe). "SHANZIRA PAIRS WITH FREDERICK, SULLY PAIRS WITH LISSA, AND VIRION PAIRS WITH SHIO!"

I'm paired with Frederick? No, please, anything but that. I'd rather be with Virion. "Makes sense..." I take a sigh. "It makes sense, but I still don't like it."

Frederick rides up to me at a slow trot. "Is this of some concern to you, milady?"

"Oh..." Shit, I need to think of an excuse. Um, what else don't I like about this formation? "I'm just really protective of Shio, you know? I don't know that Virion will know to keep a proper distance." Oh, yeah. That's a big worry, too. Crap. Crappity crap crap. Well, at least Shio has a lot of trouble falling for guys.

Something about Frederick's sighs makes me squeal on the inside. This is why I don't like him; I can't help the godsdamn magnetism pulling me towards him. "If you've paid the slightest bit of attention to his mannerisms, he most certainly will not."

I figure I'll just deal with it and move on. "That's what I'm afraid of. Welp," I offer my hand to Frederick, trying not to look at his face, "come on, lemme climb up. I'm slinging spells for this fight." Why am I such a tsundere?

He turns his face to me gods damn it now, I have to look at him or I'll look suspicious, somebody kill me. "Of course, milady." And he helps me ascend his mount.

Oh my gods. Normally I enjoy having a really dirty mind, but this time, it's proving to be the _bane of my existence_. I really did just think "he helps me ascend his mount." Where is the brain bleach? HELP ME! SOMEONE DISTRACT ME– oh hey a distaction, typo intended.

We have the Feroxi guard yelling at Chrom, Chrom yelling back, and then the javelins go flying. Wheee! And Sumia pops out of nowhere and saves Chrom's ass. I still feel like shit because that ship is happening, I really prefer Chrobin more. (Chrobin. I think I'll stick with Chrom/Robin, more fun to say.) Whew... I bet if I were up there, I'd be sweating bullets. At least Chrom can handle the height. Oh, wait, Shio has a worse fear of heights, she'd go _nuts _up there. Haha. Whenever I feel miserable, I just remember how other people would have it worse in the same situation. Sumia lands and helps Chrom off her pegasus.

And now, she's no longer a trainee, but a badass like the rest of us. Back to bottom rung I go. Shit.

"Thank the gods," I hear Frederick sigh. Wow, that was... Quite an exhale. I normally don't sigh that much, then again, I don't sigh very much. Okay, here's a better comparison: That one could give Cordelia a run for her money. "If Sumia had not been there–"

"We know," I wave a hand by his ear to try and calm him, fucking shit I just nearly touched his ear asdfghjkl; pull yourself together, Shanz. "We'd have an inverse porcupine for a boss now. But she was there and she saved him, and he's fine. So let's go! They attacked, and we get to retaliate." Hopefully my impatience covers my anxiety. I need a mirror so I can see if I'm blushing or not, I bet I am.

And then he snaps out of it, nodding his head once. "It is as you say." He turns his horse around slightly, raises his lance, and points it at the poor guardsmen now in front of us. "CHARGE!"

Fucking shit, I think his voice is louder than mine. Well, the band director back in Concert Choir always told us one tenor could easily blow our soprano-heavy choir out of the water. And we have proof: Frederick.

I wonder how his singing voice souNDS SHIT THAT ARROW NEARLY HIT ME. RIGHT. BATTLEFIELD. STOP DAYDREAMING. I want to see how a duet with me and Frederick would sound STOP IT SHANZ STOP IT. FUCK. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK. WHY SUCH AN APT CURSE. SOMEONE KILL ME. I slam my wind tome into my face as hard as I can. Much better. Okay. Think straight, and do so with your head, not your ovaries. Inhale... Focus... And ATTACK! Whoo, that was a good strike; the archer that shot at me just flew into the stone wall of the fort. HA. EAT SHIT. I flip a page in my tome, ignoring that the page I just flipped dissolved into sparkling... sparkles (I don't know how to describe it), and send a blast at a spearman. And I do believe I just KO'd him. I'm just blowing everyone away, myself incl–

...

That was an accidental pun. Damn it, Dad, you trained me so well that I'm doing this subconsciously. Damn. Welp, stay focused, got a lot of dumbasses coming for us. By "us", I mean Frederick and I. Okay, good, I've got my game face on so tightly that I can think about him and stay focused. Kill that fighter with the hammer so Frederick doesn't need to sweat– Actually, if I remember right, hammers and the hawkeye skill are the bane of _his_ existence. Ha. But this isn't Lunatic+, hell, I haven't even beaten hard mode, much less normal Lunatic.

"I got the key!" Shio shouts, holding up something metal and shiny which I presume is the aforementioned key. Excellent, go unlock the door to the inner fort. It's Frederick who directs her to do so. We all clump near it while Shio fumbles with the lock, and Virion raises a leg and kicks the door down in a rather rough way. Wow, that was... Surprisingly dashing ("dashing"? I just used the word "dashing"?! Who am I, Maria of Macedon?!) for Virion. Frederick and I rush through first, since Frederick's the mobile wall. (Virion is the one giving our orders right now, since Robin is busy.)

We get slammed with enemies, and we... No, I'm not using the same pun twice. We utterly destroy them. I don't remember this many guards in Normal or Hard mode, but this is reality; it can differ from the game. By the time the other four head through the door, they have to carefully place their feet between unconscious Feroxi guards.

I'm really impressed with myself. I just... Wow. Impressed is the wrong word, let me redo that. I'm really pleased with myself. After one last guard makes a last-ditch attempt to cut me down, I shout happily, "holy moly, we make quite a team!" And then I blast the guy five feet away. He does not get up.

I can't see his face, but I _think_ Frederick is smiling. (Smiling? On the battlefield? Guy must be as sadistic as me. Or worse... _shudder._) "Your magic skill is impressive, milady."

I laugh nervously. This is unrealistic. What am I, an ascended fangirl? I hope not. "I picked up a wind tome about a week ago! I shouldn't be this good..." Huh. I know I shouldn't have issues with this, but I do. It sucks.

"A testament to your quick improvement." Is that pride in his voice? Is he under the impression his fanatical fucking fitness sessions actually helped me? What? WHAT?! "I say you are a paragon among mages."

Huh? What does that mean? "Paragon...?" AND THEN IT HITS ME. I have the skill Paragon. Oh, I feel so stupid right now. "Oh, wow. I'm a dumbass." Palm, greet my forehead, it deserves it for such a huge derp! Gods, that was so... So... sub-par! Ugh! "Let's just roast the last one, shall we?" I point to the woman in the armor, what was her name, RAIMI! But wait, I see Chrom and Sumia rushing at her... "Or should we let Chrom handle it–"

I don't exactly see what Chrom does, but in less than ten seconds, Raimi's flat on her back, and Chrom's sheathing the Falchion. He didn't even use the rapier– then again, a rapier is a stupid idea against a fucking shellfish knight. Seriously, Fire Emblem kinda takes a poetic license with physics. But I don't need to worry about that now, so...

"Welp, the battle's over." I move one leg over to slide off Frederick's horse. I can go back to blushing and not having any focus. I need to get away from him as quickly as I ca– OH MY GODS THAT HURTS THAT HURTS HOW DID I EVEN DO THAT?! "FUCKING FUCKING FUCK!"

I hear Lissa amidst the sounds of my pain and agony. "Shanzira! Are you okay?!"

I roll onto my back, as I fell flat on my chest, and I wave towards my collarbone. I must've reinjured it somehow and oh my gods I have never endured such pain except when I first received this damn wound. I don't need to say it, but I'm still swearing my mouth off with quite a large variety here.

And then the pain blissfully fades. I stop panting and screaming, and I let out a relieved _siiigggghhh._ "Lissa, you are a goddess among women. Thank you." I stand up and rub my boobs, as they feel kind of uncomfortable after that crash. "Oohh... I did NOT mean to do that."

"Still payin' for that bullheaded rush back at the garrison?" That was Sully, she just dismounted her horse and she's looking at me while straightening our her saddle.

I stop myself from giving her the finger. "Shut up."

After that, Raimi decides to be nice, like she did in the script, and takes us to the east-khan palace where Flavia lives and trains. I follow along, because I know Robin's going to fuck up (by assuming the khan to be a huge, buff guy) and it will be hilarious. I gotta Gibbs-slap her for it.

Unfortunately, I don't get to see it. The sun went and set before we even got there, and Robin got to catch me as I fell over while marching.

I manage to groan one last thing before fading to black, a vent at my frustration for missing all the good moments: "Gods... dammit..."

* * *

**I shall work on the next chapter posthaste, but not now. There'll be a couple of supports coming along after this, at least. After cranking this sucker out, I'm tiiiired. Not a lot of comments right now.  
EDIT: NOW I remember what I wanted to say! This fic has more than 25 followers now! To all 26 of you guys, thank you and I hope you'll continue to enjoy this! I love you all.**


	9. Recaps and Reluctant Crushes

**Author's notes: This wound up being excessively long, I'm sorry. On the other hand, I did my best to pack it with quality material, so... Yum yum, fun. Lots of references to other works here, and I threw in a recap for Shanz because her memory sucks.**

**Oh, and we have a few running gags introduced here. Remember Rule number One, it's important. (and hilarious. Best rule ever.)**

* * *

"WHY IS IT SO FUCKING COLD?!"

I exaggerate not. It literally IS freezing, there's snow everywhere, it's sticking to my damn boots I DID NOT KNOW SNOW WOULD BE STICKY FUCK IT. My coat, my poor coat, it's going to be sopping wet by the time we reach the longfort, and I don't want to fight in wet clothes. Uggghhhh.

Shio, trudging beside me, takes the time to answer my rhetorical question. Man, we must be bored. "Because we're up north and it's snowing?"

I take a sigh, shivering as the chill air stabs the insides of my lungs. "Yes, but oh my gods, I never knew snow could be so cold..." My thoughts turn back to that adorable pegasus in its remotely warm environment. "Sumia, you lucky bitch, you get to lag behind and take care of a cute animal."

"Would you like me to get you another coat?"

I love my best friend. Sure, she's a little obsequious, but she saves my ass in times like these. You know, those times that never happen where I'm freezing it off. It's with great gratitude that I nod and affirm, "Yes, that might do me some good." PLEASE SHIO, SAVE ME.

"All righty then." Shio jogs a little to the back and the right to where the convoy wagon is and walks alongside it for a minute or so. Afterwards, she returns, a great big bundle of fur in her arms. What a lifesaver. "Robin seems to have quite a few of these in the convoy."

Hastily, I don the coat over my original tactician's coat. (I need a name for it. Fellcoat? That would be badass. Except it's spoilery to everyone else, damn it. Robin's Hood? ... PUNS! I'll have to remember that. Where are my mental notes when I need them?) "Thank you, Shio, you're the best friend ever."

Shio jokingly salutes at me. "Is there anything else you need, my lord?"

TELL ME SHE DID NOT JUST MAKE THAT JOKE IN FRONT OF THE SHEPHERDS. This is an old in-joke of ours, because she's so happy to be my servant, we say that... Oh, hell. I should just cover it up and be done with it. Inhale– damn that's cold– and yell while appearing to laugh, "OH ARE WE GOING WITH THIS GAG AGAIN?!" Although it strikes me that my alarm is a little obvious.

"Of course we are, my lord." She cracks a grin while cracking wise. I resist the urge to hide my face in embarrassment.

Lowering my voice to a panicked hiss, I say, "perhaps not the wisest gag in present company?!"

She smile slides off her face like... Hot water on an icicle. Well, that's not a good one. Um, she sobers up real quick, like a Lalonde who just got killed. "Oh. Right."

Robin trots up to us in a fur coat similar to mine, apparently having handed off her convoy-guarding job to someone. (Upon closer look, it's Stahl. He's got a loaf of bread in one hand, the horses' reins in the other.) "What gag?" Too late.

"Oh, um," this is a hard one to cover up, godsdammit. Thank god I'm good at improvising. "Sometimes we like to joke that Shio's the Frederick to my Chrom." Robin and Sully chuckle at this.

Sully's the one who asks, "so that means you're really obsequious?" Wow, using the same word as me. Sweet. (By the way, Sully's on a horse. The lucky bitch... I want a mount. (Take that any way you like.))

There's a pause, and I think I know why. I explained this word to Shio four years ago when it popped up in Radiant Historia (excellent game, by the way, everyone should get it), and I bet she forgot. "What does "obsequious" mean?" Knew it.

"Servile," I explain. I wish everyone had a memory like mine.

She looks from side to side, redfaced and shuffling her feet more in her gait. "No, I'm not..." She pauses, unable to find words in her awkwardness. "It's a joke, I'm not that much like a servant."

I grin evilly and decide to worsen her situation. "Butler best friend."

Indignant: "HEY!" (So. Worth. It.)

I pat her shoulder, chuckling mischievously. "You asked for it, love. Hey," I look around with a smile, inspired, "since we're in snow, why don't we have a snowball fight?"

"A snowball fight?" That was Robin's voice. I turn to regard her and see her tilting her head curiously.

I can't believe it. "You've never been in a snowball fight?" Nor have I! Snow-less buddies, YES! Whoo! Robin, I love you. I can teach you something and learn it at the same time.

She shakes her head slowly, like I'm stupid or something. "... No. What does it entail?"

I receive a sharp Gibbs-style slap to the back of the head. "She has amnesia, you arse!" That was Sully?! She knows about the Gibbs slap?! But more importantly, how did I forget our tactician is an amnesiac?!

"Oh, shit, right." I slap my forehead hard. Wow, what a derp, that was almost as bad as this morning, when I went to search for the convoy and couldn't find it until Chrom showed it to me in front of my tent. And then, I proceeded to walk away having forgotten my damn wind tome. Well, better teach Robin about snowball fights. "You throw snowballs at each other and make forts to defend yourselves from it. Easy as that."

"That sounds fun, except we're marching." My hand twitches as though to move to my forehead with all possible haste, but I hold it back. I can turn this around.

"Then, when we stop marching, we'll have to have one. Here's hoping we reach a town soon!" I finish this cheerily, hoping I've saved my apparent IQ from another nosedive.

"Actually, our next stop is the longfort." So much for trying to be smart. Whoops! Time for that head slap.

Wait a minute. Fuck. I have a few hours to prepare for our next fight. "Oh. Well then." That came out as a mumble, but it seems Robin heard it anyways.

She looks sideways at me, a weird look on her face. "Something wrong?"

I throw up my facade again, donning a wide grin. "Oh, nothing. It'll be fine. Hey," I droop my smile slightly to appear less carefree, "may I take a rest in the convoy wagon?" I point my thumb backwards to the _very fucking wagon I could not find earlier despite it being right in front of my tent_– oh wow I need to shut up about that.

Robin narrows her eyes, the way she does when she's thinking strategy. Uh-oh, that means I'm in hot water. Robin, we're friends, right? Gimme a rest, I beg you! Please! After a nerve-wracking pause, she breathes in and says, "very well. Go ahead."

I LOVE YOU ROBIN THANK YOU! "Whoohoo!" I run off to the convoy and hop in, trying not to kick Stahl in the face as I do so. "'Scuse me, takin' a rest!" I curl up in the same corner as before and find, to my delight, less pointy things nearby it. Good, less chance of killing myself. I glance out the front of the wagon; Stahl's busy directing the horses, so I pull out my earbuds, thread them through my shirt to hide them, and hit shuffle for my "favorites" playlist on my iPod. "Love So Blue" from Blazblue...? Nah. I know, let's do Condemnation Wings, the vocal version. AWWHHHH YEAH. Must resist urge to headbang! But REALLY GOOD MUSIC!

I take another glance towards the front of the wagon. Stahl's still busy. Okay. I pull out my 3DS. Since this copy of Awakening seems to reflect the reality I'm in, I should play it as much as I can to find out what I can. Okay, firing it up. ... Hey, Shio and I are in the opening, and if I'm not wrong, there are... Four others. Can't see them well AW COME ON SHOW ME THEM AGAIN fuck. Well, I'm pretty sure one of them was Welsh, he said he's here. Welp, better start playing, I only have so much battery.

The shenanigans I remember going down while we were in Ylisstol certainly do happen, but I don't remember the whole swearing-at-Virion-in-French thing happening IN Ylisstol, I'm pretty sure it happened on the way there. And the conversation Robin had with me where she asked about my coat was certainly left in; if I wrote the script for this, I'd leave it in as an important foreshadowing about the dreamers. I like to think I'm a good writer, but I can only believe that for so long before I worry about hubris happening.

Oh, yeah, that's right, I was there for the Emmeryn introduction thingy. I don't remember blurting out like an idiot back then! The game's exaggerating! Augh... This is embarrassing. Knowing me, I probably did do that and promptly forgot about it. Sigh. Embarrassed by my own game. Wow. Okay, let's have a look at the ma– wait, chapter two was supposed to happen at the Northroad, and I don't remember the Shepherds' barracks being on the map at all. Support conversations unlocked, but no supports to read... "Chapter Two: Cumulating Dreams"... Okay, then, we go to the barracks, I run off into gods-knows-where (the pantry, if memory serves), while Lissa introduces Robin to everyone. Yadda yadda yadda... Nightfall... I run into the foyer, judging from my face, I'm sleepy. Wait a second, this fight is in the game? What the fuck? Okay, um, I guess I get to see it from Robin's point of view.

Looks like I picked up tomes in my weapon levels, okay. So I'm equipped with a bronze lance– SPEAR, dumbasses! Lances are for horseback ONLY– and a wind tome. Okay. I'm up by Chrom, awww, I get to fight alongside him. Okay, let's play this shit. Wait, I can see who these guys are– what. Gods damn it, they're an unknown force. Fuckers. Okay, let's get on with this fight. (I hate not having that preparations screen! Ugh.)

...

Damn it, Sully, you were NOT supposed to die. I hate resetting. Okay, soft reset, go. (I kind of suck as a tactician.) Let's try this again, and let's be less offensive.

...

WHOO OKAY BEAT THE BOSS wait what, what's going on with this cut scene? Okay, I guess the Shio-hostage thing was a cut-scene. Damn. And there I go with my little "I'll be your captive if you let her go" dealie, he tries to lance me, I blast him back. Haha! Sucker. And then I collapse, wow, I'm such a wimp.

I feel along my collarbone, careful not to put any pressure on it. That's the fight in which it got injured. Shudder.

Save. Shio talks to me, we're both like "wow okay cool" about the whole thing, and back to the map. THERE'S THAT NORTHROAD FIGHT THINGY. Looks like that got bumped to being chapter three. Well, let's see, any supports? Huh, looks like I have one with Robin. Okay, I rea–

What the everliving fuck, this is that one conversation we had, where I taught her how to play with her hair, she was accidentally rude, and I exited with an evil giggle. Who am I, Tharja? Ugh. Well, I'll be sure to get all my supports once I beat this version of the game. All... That... Support grinding... Gods... My whole support log... Erased... NO GET OUT OF HELL SHANZ. Phew. Okay. Begin Northroad fight. Yadda yadda yadda, tutorial crap, oh look Shio's on the team, she's a Dreamer as well WHAT THE HELL SHE HAS SHADOWGIFT. BITCH! Wait, what's my starting skill? Paragon. Oh, wow, that explains why I'm level five while everyone else is levels one, two, or three. I should hang back a little.

Hm. Wait, Other Phase? So HOLY SHIT THE GUARDIAN'S ON HERE. And she just warped Shanz away from the rear guard that fucking moron. No, I don't want to be an experience hog! Ugh. Okay, let's have a look at my friendly guardian.

Class, Dreamer– wait, I thought she was a sage, what with that cloak. Umm, okay. Description: "An enigmatic mage who conceals herself behind a mask." Huh. And her skill is Shade. Well, I guess that fits WAIT A MINUTE ALL THE BAD GUYS WHO GO IN OUR DIRECTION ARE GONNA KILL ME. Fuck. Well, I'm level five, I can handle it. I'll just retrea–

...

Welp, so much for playing ahead. My 3DS just died. At least I saved after every chapter. I'll just cha– Wait. I have no charger. I... I can't play it unless I find a way to charge it. Find a way to charge it. Okay. I'll put it away. Right, I forgot, all my battery shit has limited life. How'd I forget that? Ugh. I grope around and find my wind tome, then stuff it into my cloak. Okay, I oughta be prepared for the longfort fight. I stop playing music from my iPod while I'm at it, and put it away. Sigh.

And I think Stahl wasn't paying attention to me, so I'm okay, I guess. Cool. I curl up into a comfortable sleeping position. Wait, I can't nap, I'll wake up in the other world. Um, I'll settle for one of those fake-naps I have. Where I curl up and pretend to sleep but I'm actually awake. (I did this a lot back in high school. Nobody believed that I had never fallen asleep in class, but it's true. Still haven't.) This is my version of a power nap...

Robin's curt voice stirs me. "Shanzira, get out of the convoy. We're preparing for battle."

I sit up straight, raise a hand in a salute, and shout, "yes, ma'am!" And then I jump right out of the wagon. Stahl's gone, no clue where he went. "What's wrong?" But I believe I already know the answer.

Robin shuffles through the weapons, not looking at me. "We're at the longfort, but the Feroxi guard are mobilizing."

"Oh boy," I yawn. I bend over, clasp my hands behind my back, and raise them as far up as I can (quite a ways). "Fun times. So what's our formation?"

She pulls out a fistful of vulneraries, stuffs them into her pocket, and raises her hands to point and gesture. "Our forces will be divided in two" she holds up two fingers, like I don't get it– "to storm the fort. Stahl, Vaike, Miriel, Chrom and I will be on the west side." She points to the left, er, my left. I'm facing north. "You, Shio, Frederick, Lissa, Sully, and Virion will storm the east." And her hand floats to my right. Ah, okay. I got it.

"You forgot Kellam," I point out. Everyone forgets Kellam. I would, too, except I'm making a point of remembering him. I'm noting him for his invisibility. I swear, the guy's an Heir of Void. Sigh.

Robin realizes her derp and blinks. "Oh. He'll be on my side, then." She shrugs. Haha, she doesn't like that she made that mistake. I'll try not to laugh at her for it.

"Well, I'll get into formation and spread the word." I start to walk away, smirking at this occurrence. Heh heh. I should spread around that artwork at some point. Maybe after this fight, I'll pin it into everyone's tents. I can't wait to see her reaction.

"Thank you!"

I find a rock to stand on and clear my throat. "ALL RIGHT, GUYS! I HAVE OUR ORDERS FROM ROBIN! YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU, AND YOU ARE ALL ON THE WEST SIDE! YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU, AND I ARE ON THE EAST! GOT IT?!" (I was pointing to everyone as I shouted this. I don't really feel a need to repeat exactly what Robin said, I have a thing against repetition.) Robin trots up as I step down and shout one last thing, for the purpose of raising morale: "AND REMEMBER GUYS, THE MOST IMPORTANT THING: RULE NUMBER ONE!"

Robin taps my shoulder. "What's rule number one?"

I turn to Shio, point at her, beckon, and then we both chirp the answer in unison: "Don't do anything stupid!"

The most important rule is also the most arbitrary rule. HA! It's a joke that's persisted for years. I intend to carry it well into my twilight years.

Hey, Sully got the joke! "Har! Good one! Now let's move!" She rides over by me and WHAT ARE YOU DOING GRABBING ME SULLY ABSHJKDBVSHJKBH PUT ME DOWN okay good that's much better oh gods Virion why.

"O fair lady!" He shouts, waving a hand over towards me when Sully puts me down. "What a beautiful day that sees the pair of us doing battle side by s–"

I interrupt him with a snort: "And a happy casse-toi to you too, Virion!" Beautiful day, my ass! We're in SNOW, you dumbass! Snow mixed with mud! That's not exactly pretty! Oh, I'm so glad I googled French swears.

He stops in place as though my words were a slap in the face. "Ugh..." What a theatrical frown he has on. I don't know whether I want to punch that face or make out with it as a joke. Probably punch. "Why such a cruel tongue..."

It seems I've put Sully is a really good mood; she's laughing at him. "Sucks for you, Ruffles!" With one hand on the reins of her horse, she points her lance at him and says, "_maybe_ you'll learn to keep your distance!"

Oh, hell. I've found me a new snark buddy. Time for a Severa-esque smirk (seriously, she has the best smirk ever, end of story). "These roses have thorns! _Lots_ of 'em!"

And then Frederick comes by on his big-ass horse (which is apparently female if I remember right) and ruins our fun. "As much as I appreciate the high morale, it would better befit the pair of you to keep more civil tongues." He fiddles around with his pockets, hardly appearing to pay attention to us, and I assume this is normal to him because he's just going on with his battle preparations like it's nothing.

I give him one loud PFFF. "Dude, we're hardly swearing at all!"

"Come on, Frederick," Sully chimes. "Sometimes a woman just needs to cuss like all hell!"

I don one of my patented evil grins and continue the joke. "Fuckin' shit, we do!"

The archest of archers turns and walks away from us, and I can imagine an anime-waterfall-tears face on him, oh man I need to draw that. "Excuse me while I attend to mine bleeding ears..."

"Oh, come on, Frederick, don't be an ass. A little bit of battlefield cursing never hurt anyone." What the– That– That was _Lissa?!_ LISSA, of all people SWORE?! LISSA, I LOVE YOU! You're a healer AND you have a sense of humor! This is better than hearing my dad swear!

And just like my dad would be, Frederick is shocked and promptly responds as though he's squawking (excuse me while I laugh my ass off): "You too, milady?!"

"Lissa!" I run over to her and give her a tight hug, actually lifting her off her feet (She's shorter than me! SHE'S SHORTER THAN ME!) "Welcome to the club of my best friends! I'm the chairwoman, and Shio here–" I wave my hand to the side– "is the vice presid– wait, where's Shio?" I look around for her, where's my best friend, I kinda need her–

She pops up where I'd waved my hand before, right on cue (or perhaps late for her cue). "Right here."

"Oh, there you are, I was worried for a moment there." Yeah, for like, one instant. Anyways, we're missing a bit of our orders, so I yell at our tactician. "OY ROBIN, WHO DO WE ALL PAIR UP WITH?!"

She turns to me, holds up her hands to throw her voice (meanwhile, Chrom bends over in an exaggerated cringe). "SHANZIRA PAIRS WITH FREDERICK, SULLY PAIRS WITH LISSA, AND VIRION PAIRS WITH SHIO!"

I'm paired with Frederick? No, please, anything but that. I'd rather be with Virion. "Makes sense..." I take a sigh. "It makes sense, but I still don't like it."

Frederick rides up to me at a slow trot. "Is this of some concern to you, milady?"

"Oh..." Shit, I need to think of an excuse. Um, what else don't I like about this formation? "I'm just really protective of Shio, you know? I don't know that Virion will know to keep a proper distance." Oh, yeah. That's a big worry, too. Crap. Crappity crap crap. Well, at least Shio has a lot of trouble falling for guys.

Something about Frederick's sighs makes me squeal on the inside. This is why I don't like him; I can't help the godsdamn magnetism pulling me towards him. "If you've paid the slightest bit of attention to his mannerisms, he most certainly will not."

I figure I'll just deal with it and move on. "That's what I'm afraid of. Welp," I offer my hand to Frederick, trying not to look at his face, "come on, lemme climb up. I'm slinging spells for this fight." Why am I such a tsundere?

He turns his face to me gods damn it now, I have to look at him or I'll look suspicious, somebody kill me. "Of course, milady." And he helps me ascend his mount.

Oh my gods. Normally I enjoy having a really dirty mind, but this time, it's proving to be the _bane of my existence_. I really did just think "he helps me ascend his mount." Where is the brain bleach? HELP ME! SOMEONE DISTRACT ME– oh hey a distaction, typo intended.

We have the Feroxi guard yelling at Chrom, Chrom yelling back, and then the javelins go flying. Wheee! And Sumia pops out of nowhere and saves Chrom's ass. I still feel like shit because that ship is happening, I really prefer Chrobin more. (Chrobin. I think I'll stick with Chrom/Robin, more fun to say.) Whew... I bet if I were up there, I'd be sweating bullets. At least Chrom can handle the height. Oh, wait, Shio has a worse fear of heights, she'd go _nuts _up there. Haha. Whenever I feel miserable, I just remember how other people would have it worse in the same situation. Sumia lands and helps Chrom off her pegasus.

And now, she's no longer a trainee, but a badass like the rest of us. Back to bottom rung I go. Shit.

"Thank the gods," I hear Frederick sigh. Wow, that was... Quite an exhale. I normally don't sigh that much, then again, I don't sigh very much. Okay, here's a better comparison: That one could give Cordelia a run for her money. "If Sumia had not been there–"

"We know," I wave a hand by his ear to try and calm him, fucking shit I just nearly touched his ear asdfghjkl; pull yourself together, Shanz. "We'd have an inverse porcupine for a boss now. But she was there and she saved him, and he's fine. So let's go! They attacked, and we get to retaliate." Hopefully my impatience covers my anxiety. I need a mirror so I can see if I'm blushing or not, I bet I am.

And then he snaps out of it, nodding his head once. "It is as you say." He turns his horse around slightly, raises his lance, and points it at the poor guardsmen now in front of us. "CHARGE!"

Fucking shit, I think his voice is louder than mine. Well, the band director back in Concert Choir always told us one tenor could easily blow our soprano-heavy choir out of the water. And we have proof: Frederick.

I wonder how his singing voice souNDS SHIT THAT ARROW NEARLY HIT ME. RIGHT. BATTLEFIELD. STOP DAYDREAMING. I want to see how a duet with me and Frederick would sound STOP IT SHANZ STOP IT. FUCK. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK. WHY SUCH AN APT CURSE. SOMEONE KILL ME. I slam my wind tome into my face as hard as I can. Much better. Okay. Think straight, and do so with your head, not your ovaries. Inhale... Focus... And ATTACK! Whoo, that was a good strike; the archer that shot at me just flew into the stone wall of the fort. HA. EAT SHIT. I flip a page in my tome, ignoring that the page I just flipped dissolved into sparkling... sparkles (I don't know how to describe it), and send a blast at a spearman. And I do believe I just KO'd him. I'm just blowing everyone away, myself incl–

...

That was an accidental pun. Damn it, Dad, you trained me so well that I'm doing this subconsciously. Damn. Welp, stay focused, got a lot of dumbasses coming for us. By "us", I mean Frederick and I. Okay, good, I've got my game face on so tightly that I can think about him and stay focused. Kill that fighter with the hammer so Frederick doesn't need to sweat– Actually, if I remember right, hammers and the hawkeye skill are the bane of _his_ existence. Ha. But this isn't Lunatic+, hell, I haven't even beaten hard mode, much less normal Lunatic.

"I got the key!" Shio shouts, holding up something metal and shiny which I presume is the aforementioned key. Excellent, go unlock the door to the inner fort. It's Frederick who directs her to do so. We all clump near it while Shio fumbles with the lock, and Virion raises a leg and kicks the door down in a rather rough way. Wow, that was... Surprisingly dashing ("dashing"? I just used the word "dashing"?! Who am I, Maria of Macedon?!) for Virion. Frederick and I rush through first, since Frederick's the mobile wall. (Virion is the one giving our orders right now, since Robin is busy.)

We get slammed with enemies, and we... No, I'm not using the same pun twice. We utterly destroy them. I don't remember this many guards in Normal or Hard mode, but this is reality; it can differ from the game. By the time the other four head through the door, they have to carefully place their feet between unconscious Feroxi guards.

I'm really impressed with myself. I just... Wow. Impressed is the wrong word, let me redo that. I'm really pleased with myself. After one last guard makes a last-ditch attempt to cut me down, I shout happily, "holy moly, we make quite a team!" And then I blast the guy five feet away. He does not get up.

I can't see his face, but I _think_ Frederick is smiling. (Smiling? On the battlefield? Guy must be as sadistic as me. Or worse... _shudder._) "Your magic skill is impressive, milady."

I laugh nervously. This is unrealistic. What am I, an ascended fangirl? I hope not. "I picked up a wind tome about a week ago! I shouldn't be this good..." Huh. I know I shouldn't have issues with this, but I do. It sucks.

"A testament to your quick improvement." Is that pride in his voice? Is he under the impression his fanatical fucking fitness sessions actually helped me? What? WHAT?! "I say you are a paragon among mages."

Huh? What does that mean? "Paragon...?" AND THEN IT HITS ME. I have the skill Paragon. Oh, I feel so stupid right now. "Oh, wow. I'm a dumbass." Palm, greet my forehead, it deserves it for such a huge derp! Gods, that was so... So... sub-par! Ugh! "Let's just roast the last one, shall we?" I point to the woman in the armor, what was her name, RAIMI! But wait, I see Chrom and Sumia rushing at her... "Or should we let Chrom handle it–"

I don't exactly see what Chrom does, but in less than ten seconds, Raimi's flat on her back, and Chrom's sheathing the Falchion. He didn't even use the rapier– then again, a rapier is a stupid idea against a fucking shellfish knight. Seriously, Fire Emblem kinda takes a poetic license with physics. But I don't need to worry about that now, so...

"Welp, the battle's over." I move one leg over to slide off Frederick's horse. I can go back to blushing and not having any focus. I need to get away from him as quickly as I ca– OH MY GODS THAT HURTS THAT HURTS HOW DID I EVEN DO THAT?! "FUCKING FUCKING FUCK!"

I hear Lissa amidst the sounds of my pain and agony. "Shanzira! Are you okay?!"

I roll onto my back, as I fell flat on my chest, and I wave towards my collarbone. I must've reinjured it somehow and oh my gods I have never endured such pain except when I first received this damn wound. I don't need to say it, but I'm still swearing my mouth off with quite a large variety here.

And then the pain blissfully fades. I stop panting and screaming, and I let out a relieved _siiigggghhh._ "Lissa, you are a goddess among women. Thank you." I stand up and rub my boobs, as they feel kind of uncomfortable after that crash. "Oohh... I did NOT mean to do that."

"Still payin' for that bullheaded rush back at the garrison?" That was Sully, she just dismounted her horse and she's looking at me while straightening our her saddle.

I stop myself from giving her the finger. "Shut up."

After that, Raimi decides to be nice, like she did in the script, and takes us to the east-khan palace where Flavia lives and trains. I follow along, because I know Robin's going to fuck up (by assuming the khan to be a huge, buff guy) and it will be hilarious. I gotta Gibbs-slap her for it.

Unfortunately, I don't get to see it. The sun went and set before we even got there, and Robin got to catch me as I fell over while marching.

I manage to groan one last thing before fading to black, a vent at my frustration for missing all the good moments: "Gods... dammit..."

* * *

**I shall work on the next chapter posthaste, but not now. There'll be a couple of supports coming along after this, at least. After cranking this sucker out, I'm tiiiired. Not a lot of comments right now.  
EDIT: NOW I remember what I wanted to say! This fic has more than 25 followers now! To all 26 of you guys, thank you and I hope you'll continue to enjoy this! I love you all.**


	10. Break My Own Rules

**Author's notes: Hopefully this breaks my stupid synchronized schedule with Gone2GroundEX's Asleep.**

**Shanz breaks rule number one and feels shitty for it. Other stuff happens, too.**

**Anyways, THIRTY FOLLOWERS OH MY GODS YOU GUYS STOP FOLLOWING SO FAST I CAN'T GIVE BONUSES THIS QUICKLY. I'm going to wait until a ridiculously high number of follows happens– a hundred, to be exact– before I give you your bonus, because it's REALLY REALLY SWEET but I need more characters to be introduced. As for what it is, I'll leave that to be a surprise.**

**Keep theorizing on what happens next, please! I love it when you guys do that, I get to snicker at how wrong (or right!) you are.**

* * *

Ninny glances at me from her spinny chair. "You do know finals are next week, right?"

"Oh, shit."

That's really the only way to describe my reaction. Finals really crept up on us fast... Well, what with all the crap going on in my dreams, I suppose it's natural that I'd forget how time's been going. I still wish I could get normal sleep, though; I haven't slept properly since I got KO'd while rescuing Shio. I mean, I wake up in each world feeling refreshed and energized, but I just wish I had hours upon hours of dead time. Oh well.

We JUST arrived in the city where the Khans' tournament is going to happen. Turns out it has a name other than "Arena Ferox". Seriously, it'd be kind of sad if their country's founders named everything after the country itself. Anyways, yeah we arrived in... Oh, gods. Oh my fucking gods. I forgot the name of the city. WELL DONE, SHANZ. I'll have to ask later. Haven't found Welsh yet. I'll find him soon, or I'll be pissed at myself for years.

Oh, right. Finals. That means it's mid-May, since finals happen in May's penultimate week. I sit up, look at Nin, and mumble, "I'll just, um, go iron my dog." Epic fail, what the fuck was that?

And then Nin reminded me she's an animal lover by screaming at me. "WHAT?!"

I try not to panic. I grab my lanyard with my keys, stuff my pockets with my phone, iPod, and all those things, and shout, "I got shit to do!" And then I dash out the door, swinging it so hard the hinges can hardly handle it (haha, I wish). Car, car, car THERE IT IS UNLOCK IN I GO! "Fuck fuck fuck fuck," and this is aloud as I scramble to start it, "if finals are coming up, then Fanime's almost here and I gotta finish my cosplay!" And with that, I make a beeline for the fabric store. I need to make the cape! I did all the hard stuff (boots, gloves, etc) already, I just need the cape now. Shouldn't be too hard, I have a sewing machine, or rather, I borrow Mom's sewing machine and it's presently in my dorm.

Okay. Look at all those fabrics... Need blue, and I think red satin ought to work for the inside– ooh, that's good satin. Mine. And blue cotton, I think, that should do. Royal blue cotton and blood red satin. And four yards of each ought to be good. Whew, good thing I have a job... Time to rush this crap back to the dorm and bust out the sewing machine. Unlock car, drive, wow why is "Umbral Ultimatum" playing? (I always plug in my iPod to the car when I drive.) Well, a rush like this deserves a fast-paced tune to do it justice. Park, open trunk, grab fabric, close trunk, run into dorm.

Ninny stares at me while I throw my purchase onto my bed, pull the sewing machine out of its corner, and set it up at my desk. I ignore her "um" while I get to work with this. Screw patterns, I know what a cape looks like. Where's my sharpie THERE IT IS and let's go to work.

And it only takes about an hour to finish. Hoo hoo! Nice work, Shanz! I think that's the last detail! Now to assemble it. Boots, wait no, pants, boots, shirt, gloves, armor, cape, wig! I turn around to face Nineeyena and happily blurt in my excitement, "Ninny! How do I look?!"

She stares, having already turned in her chair, puzzled and amazed. "I thought you weren't done?"

Happy chuckle, fling arms upward. "It's amazing, what I can do under pressure. See?" I grasp my mantle and fling it into the air, watching florescent light glint off the red satin. "Look at this glorious cape."

Nin smiles wide. "Well, have fun wearing it at Fanime."

"I will! Oh, gods, I can't wait." I can't contain my unbridled excitement. Fanime is like... like... A four-day long Christmas. I know Nin can't go this year– lack of money– but I'll be sure to take plenty of pictures for her and look out for cosplayers from her favorites. But let's face it; I'm going to be looking for other Fire Emblem cosplayers. They can't exactly ignore Lucina! She's pretty much the fan favorite.

And then I notice I'm about to fall asleep. Aw, shi–

* * *

I sit up, still elated from my usual shenanigans. "GOOD MORNING, ICHIGO!" I shout.

Robin cringes (We still room together, for some reason), then slowly lowers her hands from her ears. "... 'Ichigo?' And could you be a little more quiet?"

I chuckle ashamedly. "Oh, sorry, Robin. Just an old in-joke from a story I once read." Reference to Bleach. Use to love that show, back when I was a high school freshman. I still love the jokes in it, though. Isshin had the best wake-up calls: KICK TO THE FACE!

"You know, the problem with those," she seems irritated– then again, I did just shout at her at seven AM– "is that _nobody gets them._"

I shrug, still smiling, and get off of my bed. "Yeah, and? That's what I like about them. Selective amusement." Eheheheh. My gods, I can be such a sadistic bitch sometimes. But that's what makes me such a good writer, I don't shy away from torturing my characters... or my fans, for that matter. I bet I'm loved and hated on . Yet where are all the haters? I've been on the internet for seven years, and not _once_ has a hater come up to me. What the hell? Well, don't look a gift horse in the mouth.

"But making one when no one else who understands them is nearby is like talking to yourself," Robin points out. Is she trying to teach me to be socially graceful? I already know that, unlike most people I know. I just never bother for that, I prefer to be _physically_ graceful. I have a lot to show off. Then again, every time someone catches me in a nice outfit... You know what, I'll go down that road some other time. Not now. Gotta turn the tables on Robin.

"You don't do that?" _Everyone_ talks to themselves." It's a given. Both my parents do. I do. Everyone does it, like I said.

Thus, Robin reluctantly concedes that argument. "... Good point." I smirk, then pick up my coat and put it on. Oh, I found out why my coat would always be missing whenever I woke up: Frederick would always haul me back to my room or tent or whatever, and since he seems to think it's improper to sleep fully clothed, he'd take the coat off, but not the rest of my clothes since that's indecent as all hell. Well, this time, I was already in bed, so I was the one who put it up. I roll my neck around after fastening the rope on, and bend over to stretch my arms. I'm not sore at all, I think I'm finally getting used to this bullshit.

"Whew," I sigh happily. "I feel great. Collarbone's not aching."

My back is to Robin, so I don't see what she's doing. From the sounds, I think she's rummaging in her pockets, though. "I remember Lissa saying that it's fully healed now."

I look in her direction, head raised excitedly. Oh, she's messing around in the drawers of that WAIT A MINUTE THERE WAS A DESK IN HERE? Damn. "It is? Sweet!" Robin turns around to look at me while I curl my fingers into a fist and slug myself in the chest. It only hurts as much as one of my punches normally would (which is to say, it barely hurts at all). "Whoo!"

"Um," she hesitates, clearly not knowing how to word her caution against my apparent insanity, "that still doesn't strike me as being smart."

I slap my hands against my sides, where I know my pockets are; iPhone, iPod, chapstick, ID, and 3DS all present. "Sorry, gonna go have fun!" I swing open the door and rush out. BOOYEAH!

I'm warm enough from friction that the snow outside doesn't bother me too much, and it's actually thicker up here. As in, there's a good couple of inches on the ground. Excellent for snowball fights. We had one yesterday, with all the girls– Sully, hilariously, _sucked_ at it. We all kept shouting that it was her fiery aura, melting the snowballs! I wasn't too bad– I used wind magic to make mine stay on target, yeah, I'm a cheater. Robin proved herself a badass; I swear, the only reason she didn't win is because it was her first fight. Nah, the overwhelming winner in that frost-fest was Lissa. She's just really, really good with this kind of mischievous, have-fun-at-your-friends'-expense thing.

Who else was in it...? Miriel crapped out early, because the cold was interfering with her reflexes and she wanted to go study. Sumia did okay, she just couldn't run from fort to fort without tripping and being the biggest target we ever did see. Shio wasn't _that_ good, but she had me backing her up (we ALWAYS team up in these games), so she didn't die, at least. We made pathetic attempts at strategy; I had her build the fort while I threw the snowballs. I am not a tactician, I'm so glad that job is Robin's. If only Emmeryn could have joined us! That would have been cool (PUN ENTIRELY UNINTENDED, IGNORE IT). But no, she's in Ylisstol. Sigh.

Well, I'm starting to shiver, need something to fire me up OOH JEWELRY! I just found a market street, and there's this stall selling fantastic jewelry, mainly crystals and wires, not unlike a certain quartz bracelet I wear. Hm, those earrings look niiice. Sweet, they're not that expensive! Yeah, I'll take a pair. I immediately swap my old steel studs out for the awesome dangly crystals. Studs, meet pockets; pockets, studs. Ooooh, there's a little silver tiara I could get, what's the pric– um, no, that's really expensive, do I look like a noblewoman to you? Don't answer that. Robin would kill me if I blew through my paycheck that quickly. But... I may not get another chance... Lemme look at my wallet again. Okay, I think I'd still have enough for lunch after this. I'LL TAKE IT! And save it for special occasions.

But seriously, I gotta get into money-saving mode. Okay, no problem. So, how do I get lunch without wasting mon– hello, opportunity!

I know this face, he's one of the children characters, what was his name, he's the philanderer, and he has dark hair, so I guess his father's not Libra or anyone blonde. I dance up to him, swaying my hips as though I were on heels. I stop right behind him, throw out my hips and chest, rest my left hand on my hip and tap his shoulder delicately with my right. "Well, _hello_, handsome!" He spins around, almost dumbfounded, then brightens up when he sees me, grinning like a dumbass. "What say you and I–" I point at him and myself with respect to the words, then rest my hand right about my chest area– "have a little bit of fun together?" I finish this with a wink.

He's still smiling, but obviously unaccustomed to this treatment. "Wh-what? Well, um... Ahem!" He clears his throat and pulls himself together. Composed, he finally answers me: "By all means, madam, I would love to. My treat!"

YES! FREE FOOD!

I rest my pointer finger on my chin, pretending to think. "... Why don't we have lunch, and then a little–" Another wink– "mouth-to-mouth?"

He's so redfaced, I mark it an achievement that he keeps his eyes on me. "That sounds delightful!" The man offers a hand to me. "Shall we, then?" I take it, and he kisses mine gently. Well, at least he knows how to be polite.

Oh my gods, I'm on a date. My first date. With... INIGO! THAT'S HIS NAME! I'm on a date with a walking Princess Bride reference! Ahh, he's so cute, even if he is a bit shallow. As for how I chatted him up so well when I've never done this before, that is one of the many perks of role-playing; you learn how to improvise. Besides, the guy is amazingly easy to ask out, he's so happy to get approval of any kind. I trot along him, giggling the whole way, as he leads me to a restaurant that looks not unlike a steakhouse. "By the way, handsome," I ask him as we reach the front door, "what's your name?"

"Inigo, fair lady. And yours?" Oh gods, that smile, it's so cute. I shouldn't tell him my real name. Hm, let's go with... Yes, this one.

"Call me Lamby, dearie." I stick close to him, going for a romantic sort of cling, like "you're so hot I don't want to part from you". Well, he is attractive, and he is buying me lunch. If only I could get pasta... Alas. We both enter, now that we know what to call the other.

The place is surprisingly empty. Well, it's not crowded, at least, so getting a table is no problem. Then again, who eats out in winter? Well– wait a minute, what the fuck, it's MAY! AND IT'S _SNOWING?!_ What is with the _weather_ in this region?! I guess we're pretty far up north! What is this, Soviet Russia? Then again, I did just ask a guy out, instead of being asked out myself. In Soviet Russia, girls ask men out! Ha. So Regna Ferox equals Soviet Russia? I'm going to have so much fun with this.

Oh, hello, looks like they _do_ have pasta here. My life is complete. They call it a Valmese delicacy, and Inigo goes a little pale when he sees me ordering it. It's kind of expensive. Good thing I'm not paying, I'm damn near broke! Well, I suppose, to make up for my expense, I should at least give him a good time. Gods pray I know how, I have no clue how dates are supposed to go.

So, we fill an hour or so with conversation.

And more conversation.

Our plates are almost sparkling by the time we ask for the bill. Inigo's almost cracked the table; he's been slamming his hand on it from laughing so hard. I have a sense of humor, what can I say? And I bet my diaphragm's going to hurt tomorrow; I've not been unamused, either. I've been telling jokes from home, and he seems to understand a lot of them. Good thing he doesn't realize I'm a geek, though. Heh. Well, a few of my jokes have been related to Dungeons and Dragons, and I swear, Owain would play it in a heartbeat if only he knew. (Ask Shio about the "fishy fishy" thing, the DM gave her extra experience because it was so funny.)

"So," I say once the waiter leaves to get the check. "We've done one of two things on the list. I hope you didn't forget the second while you were stuffing your face." Inigo smiles at this; by now he knows my rudeness is in jest only. "You know, the mouth-to-mouth."

He leans back comfortably, eyes closed from such a wide grin. "How could I forget, my dear Lamby? I daresay _that_ is sweeter even than the food itself. And these–" he taps the table with notable gentleness compared to how hard he slapped it earlier– "are fine chefs." He belches, but covers it and adds "I beg your pardon" after doing so. He had a steak, and it looked pretty good. Sadly, I'm not too fond of steak. (Shio eats that stuff like mad, though.)

The waiter returns with the bill, and Inigo pays him. We exit the restaurant, hand in hand, and decide to make out in the snow.

This spells out just how much of a weakness I have for men: I can't keep my fucking hands off of him. It's like... Blissful heaven. Yes, this is my first kiss, shut up, it's so much fun. I do believe he's turning me on, but I know better than to fall for that kind of charm. But damn, this is just... Mmph. No words. Fuck words, just throw them in the trash bin. Screw words, keep your hands wrapped around his back, and keep kissing. How many calories does each minute of kissing burn? A lot? Heh. I'm just such a hopeless romantic.

"Oy, woman! Why don'tcha come over here and I can show ya a fun time?"

And then my wonderful funland was destroyed. Inigo and I break apart– but we're still holding each other– and stare at this big, shaggy-haired guy who I assume is Feroxi. And if I'm not wrong, there's a bottle of ale in his hand. Ew. "I don't think so," I respond, trying to smile as I do so. It's hard, though; I'm genuinely disgusted.

He frowns, showing a few missing teeth, and turns his head, looking frustrated. "Why not? Ya went and made out with that guy!" He points at Inigo.

I look back at Inigo, whose face is still in mine. I turn my head back and scoff at the drunkard. "He's handsome. You're not. Now scram." Looking back to Inigo, I make a dainty shooing motion, careful to take only one hand away from Inigo.

My date blushes even more than he already was (I think he was redfaced the entire time we made out. Speaking of, I have no idea how long we did so. Two hours? It makes you lose your sense of time). "Th... Thank you," he stammers.

"Well," shouts the jerkass, "I'll just take you by force then!" Out of the corner of my eye, I see him via peripheral vision rush at me and Inigo with a sword. I let go and take a step away.

I raise up a hand, plunging the other into my coat to grab my wind tome. "Wrong move, fuckass!" I flip the book open and flick my wrist but SHIT SHANZ DEFLECT IT THERE'S A GUY IN THE WAY okay nobody got hurt except the asshole. "Eh?!"

His blood tints the snow beneath him red, and he groans as he collapses to let frostbite settle in. "Aw... come on... Fucking..." And he lies still.

His killer wipes blood off his sword, and I recognize that long, greasy black hair (think Severus Snape as a kid), even if the clothes are totally different. WELSH! I smile brightly, I finally found him! Although, this is a pretty awkward time... He turns round to face me and comments with raised eyebrows, "wow, I finally find you and you're on a date with another guy," he points at Inigo, "and then there's yet _another_ guy–" he lightly kicks the freshly made corpse– "trying to steal you."

I shrug and lower my smile to merely being sly, not elated. "Not a typical day, love."

Inigo stutters like I just broke his heart OH SHIT I SHOULDN'T HAVE SAID LOVE. "W-wait, Lamby... You two are..." Well, Welsh does look good. But not that good.

I turn my head back to Inigo quickly, touching two fingers to his face and caressing it. "He and I are just friends, sweetie. But I'm sad to say," and here I arch my eyebrows, "I have to go now." Step back; hands clasp behind my back timidly. "My friends are waiting for me."

Inigo reaches a hand out to me slowly, and I take another step back to avoid it. I... Oh, gods, I feel so shitty. I've never seen such heartbreak before. Before I know it, I've got tears slipping out of my eyes. I'm so sorry, Inigo...

And then Welsh reminds me that he's there, damn it, I hate crying in front of him. For some reason, I feel as though he won't take it seriously. Then again, I've never cried before him. "Wait, what about me?"

I let out a sigh to calm myself, and I grasp his hand firmly. "You're coming with," I growl, and then I finally begin my sojourn back to the inn. I twist my spine around one last time to see Inigo, and my wince is plain on my face as I behold his expression again. "Bye-ya, Inigo..."

His voice is almost a squeak, which is why I hear it above the hubbub of passersby: "That... She... How cruel..." Oh, wow, I just... That was so fucking cruel, Shanz. Don't do it again. Ever.

Stomp, stomp, stomp. My feet sink into the snow, and I'm so glad I'm wearing boots. Yes, focus on the boots. Focus on the road back to the inn. Focus on Welsh. "Lucky, I guess," I mumble to him. "I didn't expect to find you so quickly."

"Well, _apparently,_" he shrugs at me while being dragged, "you're just a really lucky person."

Light burp. Ooh, there's that spaghetti I ate when I was– FOCUS, SHANZ. "Myeah. But I didn't need your help back there, I had it."

Welsh gives a light "hmph." "You don't even have a weapon on you." There's a weird thing about the way he speaks; his pitch goes up when he emphasizes a word, almost like he's screaming like a girl. (He does an excellent Nappa imitation, though; we should totally do a fandub of DBZ abridged.)

Defiantly, I reach into my pocket. Was the guy paying no attention at all? "What's this, then, a sketchbook?" I pull the wind tome out and flash it in his face. "_Yeah,_ I'm armed!"

He raises an eyebrow and brings up the opposite end of his mouth. "Well, it didn't _look_ like you had a weapon!" That's the whole POINT, dumbass! There's that jewelry shop I blew my paycheck on, passing it by.

Scoff. "And you decided I was a defenseless little girl and pulled a sword out to save your damsel in distress." Turn the corner.

"You are not my damsel in distress! You're more like that annoying little sister who always gets into trouble."

The inn's finally in sight! Almost there! "Annoying is one of the words I list under compliments. Anyways, I gotta show you to Chrom. From what I saw, you can fight pretty well!" I swing open the door and yank Welsh inside.

"Augh, why?" He whines while I glance about the foyer.

"Bo~oss," I sing. I walk forward and THERE HE IS, exiting the hallway! "Hey, Boss!" I trot up to him, and Welsh bobs along behind me.

Chrom pauses in his way to regard me, his eyebrows raising a little when he sees Welsh. "Oh, Shanz, hello. Who is this?"

I hear Welsh murmur behind me, "so you're Shanz over here." Hopefully Chrom didn't hear that.

I pull him up to my side and point at him. "This is Welsh!" I hold up a hand and tick off fingers, counting his good points. "He's a good friend of mine and he just saved my ass, even though I didn't need it." I drop my voice for the latter part of that sentence. "Point is, he can fight, we should totally haul him along!" Back to my cheerful facade, do not think about Inigo do not think about GODS DAMN IT. KEEP. SMILING.

Welsh turns to face me and whispers audibly, "this is the most awkward job interview ever." And he's right, it's weird, but it works pretty damn well; Chrom doesn't seem averse to the idea.

"Well," he shrugs, "if Shanz is vouching for you, I'll let you join the Shepherds." Oh, wow, that hopeful smile is kind of cute WHY CAN'T I STOP THINKING ABOUT GUYS, OH MY GODS.

"Cool!" Welsh fistpumps with his one free hand. "Now if only she would stop dragging me around like this!" Wow, that's a pretty pointed glare he just gave me.

Chuckle. I let go at last, whew my hand's sweaty. "Okay, sure. Just remember to be here before sundown. You're free of that sleazy inn you were complaining about!"

"Finally!" Yet another over-exaggerated fistpump; this one involved bending the knees. He quiets down and asks, "now where's my room?

Chrom went and left while I was giving Welsh the good news about his rooming situation, so I get to tell him. "Where you bunk is Robin's decision. 'Scuse me!" I slip past him, enter my room, grab my sketchbook, sit down in the foyer (Welsh has left by the point), and draw. While I'm at it, I hum. Let's go with the Fire Emblem theme, yeah, that'll be funny. Heh.

"Excuse me, milady," I jump up in the air upon hearing this voice, "but I have a request."

"AUGH!" GODS _DAMN_ IT, FREDERICK! "STOP DOING THAT!" I think I might have another anxiety attack. Please, no. Phew.

Frederick's clearly confuzzled. "Doing..." He quirks an eyebrow and tilts his head sideways. "What, may I ask?"

Exasperated sigh. "Coming up behind me and scaring the tar out of me!" Pant, pant. "I think I might just piss myself if you do that again." Wipe forehead. Yep, that's sweat. Crap. Why do the guys _always_ do this?

He bows politely. Unnnghghh. Stop doing that, this is the worst time for me to be thinking about all the attractive men here. "My apologies." He rises back up. "To frighten you was not my intent."

"Then how are you so _good_ at it? Ugh," I sigh. "Don't answer that, it was rhetorical."

He closes his mouth, because yes, I really did have to tell him not to. After that comes a small pause; I've got a particularly strange font of humor, methinks that's what threw him off. "If you say so." He nods. "Not to repeat myself, but there is a service I would have you render me. You are an artisan, are you not?"

I narrow my eyes; this rings a bell. There was only one instance in which Frederick used the word "artisan," and something tells me there were consequences. "Yes. Why?"

He inhales air, oh boy, this is going to be a long one. "I would like to commission a poster, for the purpose of raising morale." Hang on, wait a min– "I would ask that this poster depict our lord Chrom, naked, with–"

"Not," I interrupt immediately, "on your life. Shirtless, no problem; nude, no drawing." Hell no, I am NOT being responsible for that. I should warn Chrom about this. Besides, I have, um, problems drawing the male genitalia. By problems, I mean I don't– I haven't– I've never drawn 'em before. I mean, I don't draw porn or anything, just... fanservice. Abs, pecs, that stuff. And sometimes I might draw nude women, because I know what we look like. Male parts? Please, no.

Frederick seems discouraged, and if he's only discouraged, I'd better try hard to dissuade him. "Ngh... I will simply have to find another artisan, then." Uh-oh.

"_Or_ you could abandon the idea altogether," I point out. "Chrom's not going to be happy when he finds out." Oh, boy, he won't. I remember how that support conversation goes now, Chrom freaks out and tears down every poster he can find, and he's red in the face for the rest of the week. I might have exaggerated just now. I should go read those ones again, they were hilarious. But I have no desire to have anything to do with them.

From his tone of voice, he's still not dissuaded. "We shall see, then." Okay. Fine. Don't say I didn't warn you. I close my sketchbook and get up to leave, but he stops me. "If I may, that tune you hummed earlier, are you aware that it is the Ylissean national anthem?"

What? The Fire Emblem theme is the Ylissean national anthem? Wow, didn't know that. Cool, I guess. I turn to face him. "Mm-hmm." That hum wasn't too convincing. Shit. "Catchy tune."

He seems to buy it. That, or he's a damn good actor. (UNF.) "It brings me joy to see such a hearty patriot amongst the Shepherds." Oh, wow, that's a low bow. "Very well, if decline is still your answer, please excuse me..."

I avert my eyes to distract myself, ten gold says I'm blushing. No bet? "You're excused. Please don't ask me to draw people naked again." Hastily, I tread a path back to my room. I can hear him talking to himself as I leave, though, and my hearing is surprisingly sharp when I don't want it to be.

"Farewell, milady. Hm," he hums. "Her behavior is odd, quite suspicious..." Aw, crap. Yep, I bet he didn't buy it. "Methinks she merits investigation. But how..." He muses for a bit, and right as I turn to enter my room, I hear his eureka: "Ah! I have it!"

This is a bad herald.

I sigh and flop onto the bed. Robin, sitting at the desk which I didn't even know was _there_ until this morning, turns her chair around (with a terrible scraping noise, this is why I like spinny chairs). "Hey, Robin." This comes out as a yawn.

"Yes?" She's already turned to regard me, so she didn't move much there. This is starting to remind me of my dorm setting, with Nineeyena and I.

Sit up, Shanz. Whew. "Who are we hauling along for the tournament?"

She pins her eyes to the wall, trying to remember her strategy. "We're bringing Chrom, plus our five best. Frederick, me, Sully, Lissa, and you."

_What?_

I lean forward, not daring to believe this. "Wait, I'm one of the best?" Moreover, I'm fighting in the tournament? SHIT!

Robin nods at me, trying to boost my confidence, from what it looks like. "Not to preen your feathers, but your growth is astounding. I've heard Frederick call you a paragon among us." Not that pun again. I hate that pun. And it came from Frederick, the guy who SOMEHOW resembles my dad (who is the king of puns) AND is attractive _at the same time._

Welp, if I have Paragon, then I guess I ought to be as good, if not better than Robin by now, gameplay-wise. "That makes sense, then. Can't wait. I'll put in no less effort than a hundred percent."

She smiles, stands, approaches me, and pats my head. HEY, MY HAIR IS MINE TO MESS WITH, AND MINE ALONE. HANDS OFF. "I've never known you to slack on the battlefield, despite your habits off of it." Aww...

Well, "thanks, Robin." I pull her hand away from my hair quite forcibly, then hop off the bed. (Goosefeathers are surprisingly bouncy.) "Well," I grunt, "I gotta get ready, then!"

And I went and burned all my personal funds on baubles. WELP. I tell Robin to add a thunder tome to the shopping list, and then I leave to go find Sully. Yes, that's right, Sully. I'm going to have her train the everliving shit out of me. Then, I'll get Miriel and Robin to help me master the finer points of magic. Besides, I'll need to know how to use thunder magic if I want to know what happens ahead. And perhaps a Hammerne wouldn't go astray, either.

* * *

**AND THAT IS HOW SHANZIRA/INIGO WOULD GO DOWN. IT WOULD GO DOWN IN FLAMES. But the reason Inigo managed to get a date with her is because she prefers his looks well over Virion's. Also, yes, that was a support conversation between Shanz and Frederick; I'll put it in the support log now.  
Match my update pace _now,_ Gone2GroundEX. Heh. (Yes, this is a challenge.)**

**Yes, Shanz has a problem with people playing with her hair. So did you all enjoy the seriousness in the middle there? Leave a review and tell me what you think, please!**


	11. Beatings

**Okay, I admit it: G2G beat me on this one. I have a higher wordcount to keep up with, shut up, and I actually think about my writing. The reason he hasn't posted the next chapter of Asleep yet is just to piss me off. (Sucker. I'm grateful for it, I can slow down and stop panicking.)**

**Anyways, wow 35 followers and almost 40 reviews. It is wonderful to wake up in the morning and find 14 new emails in my yahoo inbox, especially since this is the only place that feeds it. (I am really tired because a certain asshole decided to agree to my little competition.)**

**This is a more serious chapter, though humor pops up in it as it goes on. Shanz doesn't try to be funny when she's tired.**

* * *

I stagger in the dorm, trying not to rub my bruises. I love you, Nin; I'm not sure I had the strength to open the door myself. What I need right now is a meal and rest. I'll have to sit still for some time...

As for why I'm in such a state, there's a renaissance guild I've been studying fighting techniques with for two years now. Really came in handy when I started dreaming. Normally, training doesn't suck as much as it did today, but hot damn, we were just practicing like mad. Everyone said I was fighting more fiercely than normal, but I don't believe them, given how exhausted I am. Or it could be that they had to compensate for my apparent improvement...

"How was training?" Oh, come on. You already know the answer, especially judging from your raised eyebrows in reaction to my hunched posture.

I limp over and flop onto my bed and give a Cordelia-esque sigh. "Hard." I rub my forehead; it's dripping in sweat. Oh, and there's quite a bit of sunscreen on it, too– if we come out of practice red as a lobster, we owe push-ups. That, and being sunburned sucks. "We're really cracking down in preparation for Fanime. I'm going to have a full schedule, between sleeping, working the dojo, and having fun." Thank gods this was the last practice before it happens... I'm not sure I could handle another beating like this.

I notice Nin's eyes glance to my cosplay, neatly folded and placed in a box (well, except for the sword; that's lying against the wall). "Are you allowed to work the dojo in cosplay?"

I blow out another sigh. "I asked, I am. Thank gods." I would roll over, but I don't have the energy. I'm going to be so sore tomorrow... I don't think I'll be able to laugh without hurting myself. Well, that sucks... I normally laugh a lot.

Ninny sits down in her computer chair, turns to the monitor for a moment, takes a thoughtful pause, then spins back to face me. "So why is your sleeping schedule so out of whack?"

She picks now to interrogate me on that. Damn it, that's clever. Right when I can't think of a good half-lie. That, and... how does one even explain this? I just groan at her.

She pushes me for details. She wouldn't do so unless she was afraid for my health, which she is, I figure. "I know you've tried not to talk about it, but..." At least she's pushing gently... "Twelve hours of sleep per day is downright unhealthy."

"Normally," I yawn, "it is. But I need the extra sleep." Ok, I'm getting uncomfortable on my back, can I flop onto my side...? ... Nope. Don't have the energy. Damn. Okay, I give up. I'll just lie here in discomfort.

She gets out of her chair to approach me, apparently noticing my feeble attempts to move. "Why? What's going on?" Now I _know_ she's worried.

If I just flat-out tell her I've been in Ylisse, gods know how she would take that. I gotta set this up. "Have you ever had one of those dreams where it's so realistic, you feel and sense everything, that you think it's real?" I doubt she has; I hadn't before I began to dream of... That place. And I worded it really vaguely just now.

"No," she confirms. So I guess she's not a dreamer like me... I dunno. I don't have the energy to think. I need food. I need a foot-long meatball sub from Subway... Or sweet-and-sour pork would do, too. Mm... I'm having a Stahl moment. Training really works up an appetite; small wonder he's got such a good strength growth rate if he has to eat so much.

"Well," I flop one arm up, pointer finger out to draw attention or whatever effect it achieves; it's a motion that doesn't require much effort: "the dreams I've had of late don't just feel that way, they ARE real. Did you notice I've been much more in shape than ever before?"

Oh, yeah, of course she'd notice that. I just got the crap kicked out of me, of course I look in shape. Well, I did fight pretty aggressively, and of course everyone else I fought responded in kind. They said they had to step up their games to keep up with me. The backlash from my training in Ylisse hurts _a lot..._

_"What?"_ How can she muster the energy for such gusto? "You're not making any sense."

Time for another sigh. "Okay. When I go to sleep here, I wake up at exactly the opposite time elsewhere, in another body, which appears to be a carbon copy of this one." How stupid does _that_ sound? Ugh... I'm getting a headache...

But she seems to understand it, and more unbelievably, she's taking me seriously. "That's why you need the extra sleep... But where's the other body?"

I grope around for a pillow to wrap my limbs around; I've recovered enough energy to do so. "That's even more unbelievable... I'm surprised you're going with this." I wonder if she'll buy it.

"You can sleep for twelve hours with no bad side effects," she points out. "I'm suspending disbelief." Well, no noticeable bad side effects. Who knows what'll happen in the future... Damn, I need a nap. NO. STAY AWAKE.

"True." Focus on Nin, that'll keep you awake. "The other body is in, um," I hesitate for one last time, totally unsure, "Ylisse, of all places."

She blinks, taken aback. "Wait, as in Fire Emblem?"

There's that disbelief I expected. "Yup. That Ylisse. With Chrom," oh gods I don't even want to think about the shenanigans that went down two years ago; I was, and I think I still am, _such_ a fangirl; "and the game I kept bothering you over..." She never beat it, anyways.

She lies back in her chair, arms folded, and I think she's smiling. "So... Anything..." Oh my gods, that was an eyebrow waggle. She's teasing me, while I'm too dead to respond comically. Damn it, Nin. "... Happen yet?"

I rack my brains and remember Inigo. Painful memory, there. The one time I go and do something crazy, I regret it like hell. This is why I hate the acronym 'yolo'. "Well, I did go on a date with one of them." If nothing else, the kissing was enjoyment itself... And... if we're talking about things happening, then I guess it wouldn't be _so_ bad if I married one of them... But picking is going to be awkward as hell. I should ask Robin. She's the on-deck shipper.

Nin sits up, interested, and please wipe that smirk off your face. "Who?"

I wave a hand at her, intending to wave her inquiry away. "You don't know him, if I gave him away, I'd spoil it."

She snorts, wow, normally she's not this determined. I think I'm finally rubbing off on her. I'm so proud of you, Ninny, you learned how to be a stubborn jackass like me. "Then I'll just play the game!"

Oh, is she finally digging herself out of her depressive hole? About damn time she turned her way of thinking around. "Well, I'll tell you for when you meet him, it's Inigo." That should give her a good laugh. "Had to ditch him, though." That should be even more hilarious. Well, guess what, it wasn't funny to live it.

I hear her start to dig around in her stuff for her 3DS. "Okay." She pulls it out and starts looking for her copy of Awakening.

I toss my pillow to the side; I think I can move now. Sit up OH GODS THAT HURTS. Okay, go around, twist that spine. Whew... "I should probably get to work, then... I gotta work on my fanfics, can't let the readers down." I am such a stubborn bitch.

She glances up from her rummaging. "I thought you didn't have time?"

"For MY readers," I stubbornly poke my chest with my thumb, "I MAKE time. I love my readers, I will sacrifice myself for them." I plop down in my chair and fire up my mac. "Rogue of Life."

She finally reveals the little white and silver card and clicks it in, not looking at me. "I never read Homestuck, remember?"

Oh gods, how do I explain the classes again? Um... "Rogue is the friend-buff to Thief's self-buff." That's actually a little awkward to say; here's hoping I got the point across. "I take from my foes to aid my friends but not myself. If there are no foes, I give of myself."

I hear the sounds and music from her game; she's skipping the opening and going straight to a save file. "So you're giving up your life for your readers."

I pull up Pages and glance over my script. "That's a funny way to put it." Last I remembered, though, I wasn't suicidal. Not in this age, anyways.

* * *

There are six of us, counting me, and we're standing, armed to the teeth, behind a huge door thingy that leads into the arena. It's like the Roman colosseum, in a way. I dunno, I don't know much about it. What an embarrassment... As a writer, I try to find out all I can about this sort of thing, and yet here's a blatant area I'm blank about.

Robin glances at me, the newbie. "Are you ready?"

What, does she think me an irresponsible idiot? "Got my tomes, got my spear, got my vulneraries. Yeah, I'm loaded." Two tomes (wind and thunder, that almost sounds like Noire's catchphrase: WIND AND THUNDER! Ha) and two vulneraries. I'm totally set; I can get disarmed twice. Good luck catching me off guard, Marth!

I hear cracking as Chrom rolls his shoulders around. ... Cracking. What the hell, man. "Us six against Khan Basilio's champions..." He draws Falchion; that steely rasp is impossible to mistake, even though I'm not looking at him. "It'll be rough."

I stop myself from groaning. "I don't even know how I wound up in this group." All I know is that Robin roped me into this and, being the idiot who always screws herself over, I agreed to it. Well, just remember what the knights say: Pull out that bloodthirsty attitude. I think these guys will be wondering for my sanity by the end of this.

I get three answers in quick succession; Lissa's first. "Because you got really awesome, really fast?" Aw, thank you, little o–

I hear the rough alto of Sully's voice next. "Because you put in the effort and improved?" Well, I did certainly do th–

"Because you attended every one of my fitness hours, without fail?" FUCK YOU, FREDERICK._ FUCK YOU._

I vent that outrage at him, twisting around and pointing at him with my spear. "I nearly DIED because of those! Remember, I vomited the first time! And I'm not that out of shape!" And I thought the Twilight Knights pushed me hard! Nope, Frederick will put all fitness regimes to SHAME with how he tortures people. He's a fucking sadist or something!

Chrom takes a hand and gently lowers my spear. "It takes serious dedication to attend those fitness hours." Oh, he must have figured some ass-kissing would disarm me? Well, guess what–

"Agreed," and this sounded sheepish, and what's more, that came out of Robin. "I collapsed my first time." Fucking wimp.

I snort. "This sounds like the first time I went to a weapons workshop, they told me the same thing after surviving the warm up exercises." STORY TIME! The Twilight Knights are the renaissance guild I train with, I started with 'em two years ago and MAN THAT WAS HELL. I survived because I kept screaming at myself not to wimp out. I sort of had a Sully-esque attitude the whole way, it was a great way to fend off my "oh my gods I'm going to die" thoughts. I can't do push-ups, and the sit-ups nearly killed me. Everything else– except the damn leg lifts and the running– was easy.

I notice Lissa suddenly got quiet. She doesn't attend those torture sessions, right... And she doesn't want to start now.

"Pshaw," Sully snorts, distracting me, "those were easy."

She gets a snort back from me. "Sully, I swear to the gods, you're a maso–"

Frederick cuts across me with a nervous laugh: "No need to speak that way here, milady!"

Wow. Really? Seriously? "Aaaaand censored. Wow, Virion isn't even HERE, he's normally the one to censor me." I suddenly see why those two can support. As I was saying, I swear that Sully's a masochist. Now I just need to find a sadist and we have a good pairing there. Wait a minute, didn't I say Frederick was one of those? I really need to discuss shipping with Robin.

Oops, there's my wake-up call from Robin: "Everyone, back into formation! We're entering the arena!" The doors begin to open, and candle light floods through the gap. I twist around and hold my spear military-style, blinking as the light hits my eyes. This is going to be an epic fight; I need good music. I should sing. Something by Luca Turilli. ... Legend of Steel, let's go with that.

I use a sigh to calm my nerves as we step out into the light. "Hoo boy... Time to kick the crap out of these guys." After about a bazillion "ahems", I inhale air and sing under my breath, then we file into our formation. I'm between Chrom and Robin, and I try not to think symbolism there. Let's try not to let those two hear, shall I?

_"The sky became darker when the news there came..."_

And the six other champions we face come at us. Marth, of course, is among them, in the very back. Coward. Come at me, bro! I'll roast you, because spears beat swords any day!

_"His cruel father was coming too fast,"_

Robin directs us to move to the right, and we do so, staying in a line the whole time. The idea is to thin them out a little and give the guys on the left more distance to cover before they reach us, buying us time.

_"Leaving behind him cancer and sorrow,"_

Weapons out, ready positions. Here's what the line looks like: Sully on the right/front, then Robin, myself, Chrom, and Frederick at the end. Lissa's behind us; Robin brought her because we'd be pretty fucked if we didn't have a healer. Frederick gets the job of protecting her.

_"So satisfying his thirst for vengeance..."_

Oh my fucking god, that's the Guardian, over on the left. Fucker. At least she's a good distance away. I roll my neck around, hearing it crack.

_"It's time to call the wisdom of the wind,"_

I jab my spear forward as a practice shot, and as a threat to the nearest champion. Yeah, don't mess with me, asshole. I'll impale you! COME AT ME, BRO!

_"The whisper of the shadows,"_

We rush at them to wipe them out. LET'S GO! A battle cry, fresh from the pit of my belly, rips across the air, resulting in a huge crescendo for this song. Yeah, I can sing and fight at the _same fucking time!_

_"The sword and the shield, the power of the steel,"_

And we meet with a deafening crash. Robin bifurcates one while I take a wound to the knee; Sully rides in front of me to protect me while I step back to down a vulnerary. Down the hatch! And I resume singing.

_"To win the mask of hell!"_

With the exception of the one champion who I was lucky enough to kill, the others are pretty tough. I have a job waiting for this vulnerary to do its work while Robin and Sully avoid fatal blows. Frederick... I'm not even worried about him. And as for Chrom, well, he's just being a badass out there. Now, the refrain:

_"Face the king, ride the wind, for the legend of steel,"_

Lissa heals me. FINALLY! I can run out there and do shit! Thank you, Lissa!

_"Leave dark hell behind you forever..."_

BACK INTO THE FRAY FOR ME; EAT STEEL, BITCHES! I briefly interrupt my singing to scream out what I would call a critical quote: "AND THEN YOU DIED!" and a myrmidon drops to the ground as I pull my spearhead out of him, dead as a doornail.

_"Face the king, ride the wind, for the legend of steel,"_

"Nice shot, Shanz!" Sully shouts at me, deflecting an axe. "I like your attitude!"

"Thanks!" I shout before continuing to sing.

_"Break the chains of the past forever– Face the king!"_

With a great CLANG, Chrom crashes into Marth. They have a moment of dialogue while I'm taking a few beats of rest and blocking weapons.

"Tell me, who taught you to fight like that?!" Wow, he sounds so frustrated. Wait, this is straight out of the game, if memory serves.

Marth growls and feints to the side, then comes in for a swing to the leg, which Chrom promptly deflects. "My father!"

_"And so the day came, son against father,"_

Oh, wow, that is such a fitting lyric, and Marth probably heard it, I sure as hell hope not. I hear a groan of pain and glance to the side to see Frederick retreating a little, with Lissa running forward to heal him. And... Looks like it was the Guardian who did that to him. Okay, I might just forgive her for fighting against us.

_"Clash of their weapons at the crash of thunder!"_

Chrom and Marth lock blades once more and have another snippet of strangled dialogue, which I unfortunately miss for my singing. I won't let plot points get in the way of me belting my songs out; besides, I already know what they say.

_"Hard was the fight, in that unholy night: so red the ice was never..."_

I do believe I see blood on the ground. How hard are those two fighting?! Wait, no, it's from wounds they already have. Okay, yeah, sure. I think Chrom needs some help; I motion for Sully to handle this douchebag.

_"The sword and the shield, the power of the steel, to win the mask of hell!"_

I jump into the fight and let out some dialogue in between verses. Let's scare Marth a little. "Hey, I know where you're from, and I know aaaaalll your little secrets..." _All_ of the secrets!

Marth lazily blocks the stab I jumped in with. "I thought you might."

OH HELLO THAT'S A YUMMY PIECE OF INFO. I dig the butt of my spear into the ground and point a finger at Marth, teasingly. "So I guess I was there, then. In that setting you come from." Dumbass just revealed precious intel to me.

He... She, yes, he, he raises the parallel Falchion and points it at me. "... Raise your spear, woman."

_"Face the king, ride the wind, for the legend of steel,"_

How rude! Snort. "Hey, I'm older than you! Respect your elders, kiddo!"

_"Leave dark hell behind you forever..."_

I pull out my spear and swing it around for a butt-spike. He blocks, but Chrom sees this opportunity to gang up on him.

_"Face the king, ride the wind, for the legend of steel!"_

It's a few really quick blows before the parallel Falchion goes spinning in the air and I knock Marth to the ground with a little more gusto than I should have.

_"Break the chains of the past forever– Face the king!"_

He crumples down, grunting in obvious pain and shame. "N-no... Too strong... I must... Retreat..." He begins to drag himself away, and I glance at Chrom. He nods at me, and we let him be. He already lost, and he's an honorable sort.

"No!" I turn my head to see my Guardian; she shouted that. "Of all people to lose, it's you?" Oh, she's screaming that at Marth. Okay, yeah, let's face it, that's got to be a child character. I'll eat my hat, or I'll eat one of them (I have a full hat rack in my dorm), if she's not.

_"Oh beholder, what did you do? May the Lord forgive your action..."_

I point my spear at her one-handedly. "Why are you here? I thought you said you were here to protect me!"

Her response is strikingly squeak-like. "So I am! This is what I must do."

The fuck?! "You'd kill me in this arena?!" WHAT A LYING LITTLE HYPOCRITE!

_"The black raven is now flying, while the brave one's slowly dying..."_

She steps back and I see her fumbling with what I think is an Arcwind. "I will not kill you," she squeaks. "I will only defeat you."

_"But he swears with his last breath, 'I'll be back,"_

I give her a defiant snort. "Sorry, not taking that crap for an answer!" And I rush at her. My sudden aggression surprises her, and she doesn't really have much in the way of blocking. Against a flurry of stabs, she's outmatched, but I just have to make sure she doesn't hit me with her magic.

_"To take you to the dark altar, the kingdom of pain!'"_

HOLY SHIT THAT ARCWIND HURTS! I crumple to one knee, then roll over and shout behind me: "ROBIN! Help me!"

The good tactician stands over the spearman she just slew, and nods at me. "Of course!" She rushes to me, sword in hand, while I drink more of my vulnerary.

The Guardian steps back in dismay. "Those two... Together... No, I am outmatched... But I will fall before I give up." Hmph! Fine, be that way! I'll roast you and I'll toast you! Robin takes the right; I take the left, and we work together to bring her down.

_"Face the king, ride the wind, for the legend of steel!"_

She's notably difficult to take down. I guess Chrom had an advantage over Marth; the Guardian's not as good as him, but still a formidable foe, and sadly, Robin's not on par with Chrom in terms of fighting prowess.

_"Leave dark hell behind you forever..."_

That bitch is using a balmwood staff on herself! AND SHE'S USING IT TO BLOCK, TOO! WHAT THE HELL?! "Robin, cut it in half!"

_"Face the king, ride the wind, for the legend of steel!"_

SNAP. The staff shatters. I spin the spear around and stab the Guardian in the face with the butt-spike, being sure to hammer her multiple times. There's a crack; blood streams down from her nose.

_"Break the chains of the past forever– Face the king!"_

I knock her down hard with the butt-spike, then spin the spear back around to point the blade at her. "Done," Robin says.

_"Face the king, face the king, face the king!"_

Leaning against the spear to regain my balance, I bend over backwards to stretch. Aaaahhhh, that was a hard fight. Didn't help that I was singing throughout it, either. Damn. And the Guardian, of all people, fought against us. That was a game-changer, I guess... Welp.

The first thing Chrom says is the best way to sum up the situation, vagueness and all. "That's the end of that."

I bend over, clasp my hands behind my back, and bring them up. "Not a face I expected to fight..."

Our fearless leader looks at me, puzzled, knowing who I'm talking about. "I thought she said she was protecting you?"

I straighten out again. "I interrogated her on that, she said this was necessary to do so." Shrug. "She still lost." But damn, she... She looked so much more awesome on the Northroad. Oh, well. "By the way, Robin, well done directing us. I would've failed that." I was the idiot who'd rush into the middle of the arena in-game. YEAH, GREAT WAY TO GET FLANKED, DUMBASS. It was hard mode before I realized how stupid that was.

There's a bit of irony to Robin's response, as she panting in exhaustion. "It was no trouble." Yeah, right. No trouble, my ass.

I glance around and see all the spectators filing out. "So why am I still here?" I'm the least important person here. Sully and Frederick have the luxury of being knights, at least.

SMACK. Ouch, right on a wound, Sully! Watch it! "We're the champions, you arse. We kinda have to stick around and talk to the Khans."

"Damn it, Robin." Now that my heart's slowed down, I'm starting to yawn again. "I still wish you hadn't picked me."

You do know there's a bruise on my shoulder, right? SO WHY DID YOU PAT IT?! "You helped us win. You were necessary for my strategy. Your spear expertise was extremely helpful."

Hm, yeah, sure... "Marth knew how to counter it in advance." If Chrom hadn't been there, Marth would have kicked my ass without breaking a sweat.

OUCH LET GO OF MY SHOULDERS THOSE ARE BRUISED! YES I KNOW YOUR EYES ARE WIDE IN ALARM ROBIN BUT CALM YOUR SHIT! "What?!" She squawks at me. "But how?"

"Hell if I know," I grunt in pain. A revelation dawns on me: I might've been in the original timeline. So... Oh, gods. My mind turns to Inigo. This is going to be really, REALLY awkward in a couple of years...

* * *

**I'm worried that this is sub-par for my standards; I really rushed to keep up with him. Seriously, one day is REALLY FAST for me. And I'm used to speed. It also doesn't help that I'm sleep deprived; I was up past midnight on the computer, and that is waaaaaaay too late for me. Unlike in D&N, I actually try to regulate my sleep schedule irl.**

**Yes, the renaissance guild thing is real, I didn't make it up, they're awesome. Also, "Legend of Steel" belongs to Luca Turilli, it's not mine, I'm just using it because it's awesome and made of win.**

**So, leave me a review and tell me if you think I should slow the hell down. I probably will, anyways; I need to procrastinate...**


	12. Elle Vent

**Author's notes: Someone go kill G2G and revive him in a couple of days so I can catch the heck up. Seriously. He has a thousand word head start on me right now.**

**This chapter starts off serious, as a vent to shenanigans happening in my life. I hope you don't mind me rambling about them, I sort of used it as a stepping stone for a plot point. After that seriousness, however, you get comedy again. I think. I don't even know if I'm being funny; I'm just being me and you guys tell me you can't stop laughing.**

**The title is French for "she gusts." It's how you say "It's really windy out!"**

* * *

Oh, that's my phone. It's playing Vriska's theme (Homestuck, anyone?) which means that it's my mom calling. I'm fond of Vriska, she has an awesome theme, and my mom deserves such an awesome theme. I pick it up and answer. "Hey, mom. What's up?" Hang on, her tone is really serious, and if I'm not wrong, she's crying. Why's her voice shak– "Oh no."

"Uh-oh," Nin says from her computer, and judging from the sounds she just paused her game to listen. I continue conversing with my mother.

"Tell me everything now so I can cool off by the time I get there." I try to say this calmly, but I think some of my temper leaked out. I have a somewhat odd way of being angry; I don't explode, but if you come near me I'll snap at you every time you speak. Mom continues with the deal, and I have to stop myself from snorting derisively. "Oh, wow. Well," I take a deeeeeeeep breath here, "it's about time he learned to fear his little sister's ire."

Nin picks NOW to speak up, so I miss Mom's reply. "Your brother did something again?"

I look at her, eyebrows dipped into my eyes, and hiss a quick "shh!", then I turn my back to her to hopefully block her out, and tell Mom, "I'll be over as soon as I collect myself." _That might be a while,_ I think as I hit the button to end the call. It's been two years, but I'm not any less angry for the previous incident. I slowly put my phone away and pick up my lanyard. "Dumbass got into another accident," I mumble as I prepare.

Nin sinks back into her chair; I hadn't even noticed she was standing. "Oh god."

"He just..." I stammer briefly, searching for my chapstick, then I go on as I mentally pave the path for my rant. "He never learns, does he? He's incurable. I can try to fix his depression all I like, but he doesn't seem to want it fixed! So he's stuck in this damn pitfall until he realizes it's him who has to pull himself out! Rr, I'm gonna beat the shit out of him!" I ended up crescendoing that, that probably wasn't a good idea. Pull yourself together, Shanz... And for fuck's sake, don't fucking cry. "... Not literally."

"Well, good," Nin says nervously, not moving. "I don't think that would help much."

I stagger out a sigh, my pockets stuffed. "I don't even want anything to do with him anymore." My butt meets my bed in a tired fashion, and I reflect upon a nerve-wracking truth: "It's scary, how I was so like that a few years back... Thank gods my capacity to hurt myself was much smaller then." I don't want to talk about it. Not any further.

My roommate points out a helpful fact: "You don't have to see him if you don't want to."

But, alas... "What sort of little sis would I be, not being there for my family when they do stupid things? Nah," I sit up, trying not to wince as I'm still sore from that training session a couple days back, "I may not like it, but I got shit to do." Keys in hand, I stride to the door and swing it open.

I'm really grateful for the sleep later.

* * *

"Is something wrong, Shanzira?" Sumia's leading her pegasus along the ground to rest her wings, and it's a good thing; she's my Robin-assigned marching buddy for today. I do not enjoy keeping up with a flying pegasus. I am not that good of a runner.

It's _weird_ how being in Ylisse makes my physical deficiencies seem unimportant. I suppose it's how marching band members are expected to know how to handle all their instruments, and there's no reward for mastering loads of them. I don't know how to describe it.

"Nothing," I lie with a sigh, "I just... I'm very angry." I look at the ground I'm marching on; I have no desire to attack Sumia right now, though I might be tempted to lash out at everyone around me.

She stammers timidly, but it's brave of her to push me. Quite brave... The tongue-lashings I've dealt in the past twenty-four hours aren't anything to sneeze at. I _rehearsed_ that shit. "W-well, you seem more depressed..." More depressed than angry, she means.

"Sumia," I call her name to bring her attention to me, to wake her to a painful truth. "When I'm angry, I have to sacrifice all other emotions just to hold it in. Perhaps Robin should have had you march with someone else." I wave a hand in the direction of where Robin's marching, just a little to our left. Left is east when you're going south. Okay.

Brave girl. She's still talking to me, trying to calm me down. Perhaps this is how she calmed her pegasus (which, by the way, she named Caeda. Urf). "If I can help a friend out, then I will. I'll be fine," she adds almost cheerfully. Again, that has the air of the girl who gets left behind and attacked by zombies.

Nosy, but brave. Reminds me of someone I know. After a moment's thought, I release another sigh. I swear I'm turning into Cordelia. "You're so like me in that respect. Thank you." I finally crane my head around to regard her. "Will you listen?"

Sumia hesitates, but still volunteers. "I'll listen, but I don't know what help I can be..." Why is it I find myself admiring her? I normally despise her timidness; I write her off as being pathetic and annoying. Yet now... Now's different.

I give her a look that has some positive emotion in it, which took some effort to stir up. "All I need is a good pair of ears and a reminder that you're there."

My brother. That's what I talk about. My stupid older brother, who doesn't realize how much he's screwing up every time he drinks. Never does he mind his little sister, who despises shedding tears, yet cries every time he gets himself into some inebriated shenanigan. I imagine it's only fleetingly, if at all, that he thinks of his parents who have to mind his idiocy even though he's moved out. He's depressed– I can easily tell this from the symptoms; I've suffered it myself, and it's all too similar to what I was like at that time. If he doesn't recover soon, I fear, he might try... No, I don't want to even think about that. (Sumia prods me on about here.) He might try to kill himself, is what I'm worried about. Yes, it bothers me, it bothers me a lot. I... No, I don't want to talk about it.

Okay, fine, I'll tell you! I once thought I'd do it myself! I was decided on it, for that brief amount of time, and had I the means, I would not draw breath here and now! But I'll never fall to that low ever again, I swear! And if anything, I'll do what I can to keep everyone I can out of it... Because no one deserves to suffer like that. Not even my stupid, idiotic brother...

Gods, this is so overdramatic. Why am I crying? For the love of the gods, Shanzira... This is a sorry display, and it ill befits you.

"He sounds like he needs help," Sumia murmurs. I nod my head in tearful agreement, not wanting to irritate my eyelids more by wiping them again.

"Yes and no. We've tried getting him help, but unless he decides that he actively wants to change, that help won't do any good. He has to turn his way of thinking around, like I did." And gods know that's a hell of a job. I was ready to turn it around, I was willing, and it was easy... But Brian, he's a stubborn jackass. He's earth, unshakable, immovable. I'm water; I can flow any direction I need to suit my needs.

"Like you did..." Her voice quavers slightly more than usual. "You've... Oh, I'm so sorry..."

I pat her shoulder (quite a job; she's up atop her pegasus and I'm on the ground) and sigh. "I need to make my peace with this anyways, calm yourself. But I won't say any more on the matter."

I detect a hint of admiration in her voice, and it's very similar to what I felt earlier towards her. "You're really strong, Shanzira."

Normally, the spotlight of high praise gives me stage fright... But here, it's needed. "Thanks." That came out as a mumble; I can do better. "Thanks, Sumia," I repeat. I jump up and wrap my arms around her torso in a tight hug, almost pulling her off of Caeda, but she just pulls me onto the saddle with surprising strength (Or it could be that I'm _really_ lightweight).

"You wanna take a ride on Caeda?" She offers, almost excited. Ah, she's trying to cheer me up by presenting a cheerful facade... I appreciate the gesture. I nod and flip my left leg over the saddle. Away we go!

It's REALLY FUCKING WINDY up there! Like, holy crap! And riding a pegasus isn't exactly a smooth ride, but that makes it all the more fun. This is so much better than a swingset, it's ridiculous! OH SHIT SUMIA DUCK BENEATH THE CLOUD THANK YOU. We're flying high enough up that we're encountering clouds? Fucking shit, you need to take us lower, buddy. Whew... Let's land, I've had enough of this hour long heart attack. And the sun's almost set, so come on.

Whoa... I swear, the ground's wobbling beneath us. I drop off the pegasus and promptly crumple to the ground. Ouch! Despite the roughness of my fall, I find myself laughing hard at it. Okay, stand up. Crap, I need to get my land legs back; it's like I'm on a ship at sea, what with how dizzy I am. I do so love being dizzy... Now where the hell is Robin? I wave Sumia away and run off to chat with Robin, but I fall flat on my face on the way. Good gods, she's contagious. Dammit. Still laughing, I rise back up and stumble up to the good tactician.

I shout at her while I'm still a good distance away: "Robin! I love you!"

"Hm?" She turns around, having been in an animated conversation with Chrom (Eeee, OTP!) when I interrupted her.

I come to a sloppy, dizzy salute and try not to fall over. "Best marching buddy ever! Thank you!"

She eyes me with more confusion than she usually does, and stumbles out a hesitating "you're... welcome?"

FWUMP. Sumia and Caeda land beside me. I really like that sound effect, do it again! No? Okay, you're gonna giggle? Okay, sure. Sumia clears up the point I just mentioned. "She means to say that she's grateful you paired us up together."

Robin's eyebrows shoot up in understanding as she says, "oh, thanks for clarifying. Well, as I said, you're welcome." She just shrugged that at me! The hell.

Welp, I have a more business-like question for her. "We setting up tents?"

She nods. "Yeah, we've stopped marching for the day." Whoo!

"Okay, then! I have work to do!" I throw my hands up in the air and run off. Oh, this is gonna be _great._

"I don't like the sound of this," I hear Robin say to Chrom.

_Heheheheheheh._

Hurry up and set up the tents, guys, I have a prank I need 'em for! Ah, there's flat canvas! I pin a poster to the canvas wall, then dart off to find more of them. I run out of posters quickly, then I go to my tent, set it up, and wait inside it.

OH BOY I HEAR ROBIN RIGHT NOW! I wipe the stupid grin off my face ninja-fast.

Robin's silhouette is plain against my tent wall for a moment, and I palpably hear her call out for me. "Shanzira! Where are you, you little–"

I interrupt with an obligatory cross between height gag and reference. "Who're you calling so short she doesn't even reach half the height of her spear?!" I had that REHEARSED. I was so ready for this.

"Wha–" Robin pauses for a moment, dumbfounded, then storms into my tent. She snarls anew: "I never said such a thing! And you! Why did you–"

"Calm your shit," I wave her away, "I was just joking. Old in-joke from home." I actually got the nickname "Edward" from one of my friends, and she was talking about Edward ELRIC. Said friend is the same one who named me Merida, she's a nicknamer. What else did she name me? Strider, if I remember right, since I cosplayed as Dave Strider from Homestuck that Halloween.

I'm drawn back to reality (a beautiful reality) with a snort from the tactician. "That's not what I'm angry about! Where did THIS come from?!" And she holds up my precious artwork of her kissing Chrom. Yes, that's what I was pinning up earlier today. SHIPPING.

"Oh my," and I can't hide a Severa-smirk, "I'd say someone thinks you two look good together." I'm trying to imply that I had no hand in it, but it's hard, I'm actually really bad at this (but trying to figure out how to improve). "Actually, I have to admire the quality of this art, it's–"

She cuts me off. "It's yours, isn't it?"

"Well fuck," I laugh. Oh well, I know whose ire I face, it's that of Grima herself, and _I REGRET NOTHING!_

She crumples it in her fist and leans over to yell at me; if she and I were sparring, I'd say she just presented me with a wonderful opening to her head (poke poke poke!). "Why would you draw this and then _distribute copies_ of it around camp?!"

I'm still laughing when I reply, "ehhh, two reasons: Revenge, and I thought it would make an excellent prank." And boy, it did. Hoo, I'm gonna have a job drying these tears, they're tears of laughter. Aw damn, I'm still sore from the aggrieved tears earlier, fuck.

Her reply is almost prefaced with an "uh?!" sound. "Revenge for what, that comment that one time?! That hardly warrants such a–"

"Far more prank than revenge, though," I reflect happily.

Oh my, I do love that shade of red her face is turning. I really do, it's just... Wow. I have to use that red in a drawing sometime. "You do know I can hardly stand to go near Chrom because of this, right?!" She flashes the crumpled and ruined artwork in my face again.

I lean back calmly. "Really? Huh," I chuckle. "Well, that means the prank worked and got the desired effect." I close her eyes and brace myself, still smiling.

_"YOU WANTED THIS?!" _I do believe I just heard Lon'qu jump and nearly scream (think Ragna the Bloodedge reacting to ghosts, if you've ever played Blazblue) outside the tent. Yeah, we recruited him, I just never see much of him despite how cool and fucking hilarious he is. I need to run up and glomp him sometime and see how he reacts.

I hold up my pointer finger to draw her attention. "Not to sound like a broken record, but calm down, Robin." Clam down, I thought. Damn, I have got to stop rereading Homestuck. "It's just a prank. I'll explain that to the boss, okay? And that explanation will be accompanied by a sincere apology." I wave that same hand I used the pointer finger of to wave her worries away. Then, screwing myself over with no regrets, I add: "In the mean, I still plan on laughing my ass off."

There's plenty of air in Robin's mouth; she's trying not to literally explode at me. I'm so glad she's not Grima right now. "You, you... You witch!"

Aw, she didn't outright call me a bitch? Robin, I am _disappoint _(sic). "Ahh, some advice for you, my dear Robin," I sit up again to properly deliver these morals. "Live life to the fullest. A day without laughter is a day wasted." After that, I stand and approach the exit to my tent. "Think on that, love, and maybe you'll be a little more fond of winging it." I step out, and linger just long enough to catch what she says.

"Why would I... Argh! She's gone! That little minx!" Whatever happened to that attention span, eh?! _HAHAH!_

* * *

"Shio!" I call out, spotting my tall, blonde, and morbid best friend. I wave over at her, and her dark mage cape flutters a little as she turns to face me.

"Hm?" Oh, look, Welsh is there too. I never mentioned, but he's in black thief attire, with this hilarious little cape and all. I guess I was right; once upon a time, I nicknamed him "Gaius". (He'd refuse to talk to me for the rest of the day whenever I invoked said name.)

I throw my arms up and cheer: "PRANK SUCCESSFUL!"

"Oh, yeah, that was great." Welsh isn't smiling, so I give him an overexaggerated flat stare. Wait for it... "I still prefer my idea better."

I fold my arms. The dumbass suggested switching out all of Robin's tactical books for books on useless things. "Of course you do! But this one's more me." So much more me. I'm more wont to tease people with art than I am to waste money on useless books.

"Well," Shio says with eyebrows up and eyes slightly downcast (but not sad!), "I don't want to be near Robin for the next day."

Chuckle. "Yeah, sound advice." Still worth it, though. I wonder how long it'll be before I can sleep in my tent again.

* * *

As it turns out, she'd left the tent to find me, and that failed epically, so I got to sleep in my bed. And when I woke the next morning, she hadn't retaliated, either, which surprised me. I suppose that's waiting until the A support... Yippee. Our arrival back "home" in Ylisstol is surprisingly uneventful; if I remember right, we're supposed to receive some baaaaad news soon. But when we briefly step into the barracks to catch up with the poor saps who got left behind, we find out they went and recruited Donnel. Sweet, he's adorable. Not hot, mind, but just huggable. So naturally, I welcomed him with a glomp, then ran off to eat something, right behind Stahl.

After that, we took a trip back into the city, which isn't far from here for Chrom's standards (even though my feet hurt again by the time we get there). Most of the Shepherds who came with decided to patrol and wander the town; I grabbed Shio and Welsh to show them the palace, because it's just so pretty.

"I still can't get over the crapload of art in here!" That's my general comment about it. Sure, the palace itself isn't built to impress, but when your kingdom's been at peace for a little over a decade, you spend more money stimulating the economy than waging war. Thus, the artisans certainly are happy with this. As an artist myself, I'm quite happy.

Welsh folds his arms, his eyes nearly closed and his head tilted down. "Well, you would spend all your time admiring it. It's like you're an art-o-phile." He reminds me a little of Lon'qu, appearance-wise. Except with longer hair.

I face him with a stupid smile. "That's not even a real word. But I am pretty close to being a schediophile, or I was back in high school." Hoo boy... Don't get me started on that.

"Schediophile"? Dammit, Shio. What did I just say? ... Never mind.

I picked up the word off of Tumblr, by the way, and did my best to remember it. "One who is attracted to animated characters." It took me several tries to get it down, believe it or not.

There's a bunch of nodding in our little trio as we hit a common consensus. "Yup, that's you."

"No doubt about it," Welsh agrees.

They think me shy about it? "I'm not going to argue there. I'm comfortable with my flaws, at least," hesitation crops up here, "all but one."

Sometimes, my friends can be stupid and socially clumsy. This time, it's Shio. "Which flaw is that?"

I try to hold back a pointed glare, but it's a hard job. She cringes when I sigh at her. "Gods, Shio."

She looks confused at first, "wh–" and then realizes what I mean. "Oh."

Nod nod nod. "Yeah." Awkward pause. I spin around on my ankles to take in my surroundings again, marveling at the art and the wonderful distraction it provides. Hey, look! A better distraction. "Oh, look, it's Emmy." This came out with less enthusiasm than I meant it to.

"... Emmeryn?" Shio tilts her head, confused at why I'd note that. Unless, of course, I'm just that bored.

Let's try my hand at social skills again. Show up these two. "I'll see if I can hold a friendly chat with her." On light toe-tips, I dance off to her.

Welsh reached out his hand to grab me, but I escaped his reach too quickly. "Shanz, n– too late." The exalt has seen me approaching her.

No matter how much it hurts, I give her a bright, sincere smile. "Hello, Emmy!"

Her brow furrows, but only briefly. "Who– Ah, Shanzira." Wow, she's good! "How fared you?"

I mind my posture and limbs carefully as I speak to her. It's like being onstage, and I like to think I'm a good actress. "Quite well, actually. And you remembered my name! I'm impressed! And you only heard it once. I have to hear a name twice at the least before I remember it." Oh my god. Watching Bleach was a pain in the ass because of this. What was Ichigo's sword named? I didn't pick it up until the end of the soul society arc. Sad, right?

She tilts her head, obviously curious about this quirk. "Is that so? I hope that hasn't caused problems..." Well, I can see why she'd worry about that. She worries about everyone... She's so sweet. I really wanna hug her; it's the least she deserves before the shenanigans in Plegia go down.

I ease her concerns. "Nah, I've survived so far."

Her face returns to a smile. "And impressively so. Chrom told me you were chosen to be one of Flavia's champions." Did he now? Aww, thanks, Chrom.

I chuckle and hand her my standard humble response. "I have no clue how that happened." This comes with a shrug. "Robin says I improve really quickly, but I don't believe her."

Emmeryn is just a ray of fucking sunshine; she's still smiling, and finding new ways to make her smile so interesting to look at. Granted, a sideways tilt isn't much, but it achieves dramatic effect. "You give yourself far too little credit, Shanzira. I have heard mostly good things about you." They exaggerate, I swear to gods!

Hello, what a chance to hear what my critics say. As an artist, I live off of criticism. "Mostly? If I may ask, what's the bad that they say?"

Her smile fades; she hesitates, wondering if it will dampen my mood, but in the end, she tells me. "... Some Shepherds claim you to be overly obnoxious." I bet Lon'qu certainly will by the end of the week.

Time to blow away her fears with a good chuckle. "Yup, they're quite right. But I'm too fond of my playful attitude to let it go. It's gotten me through serious troubles." ... Troubles I need not repeat.

Back to that demure grin. "Then by all means retain it. You should not have to change yourself to please anyone else."

I nod my head almost as if I'm rocking out to heavy metal. "I hear ya there. I've been following that advice for years." Since what, middle school (aka hell)? What a hard way to learn lessons... But it's better than the path my sister picked.

I hear footsteps, and a winded and disheveled pegasus knight sprints up to Emmeryn. "Your grace! Urgent news!"

Immediately all business, she gives the knight her full attention. "Yes?"

She bends over to pant a little, then stands up straight and declares, "soldiers from Plegia disguising as brigands attacked a village in Themis and kidnapped the duke's daughter!"

Aaaaaand there's that bad news. "Welp," is all I have to say on the matter.

* * *

**The theme of prankster!Shanzira is "Catus Carnival" (Taokaka's theme! Tao is the best idiot) from Blazblue. red lilies asked for music that fits to this, so I'll add that "Stardust Memory" (also from Blazblue) fits the mood Shanzira was in while chatting with Sumia.**

**To the reviewers who ship me with G2G: Keep dreaming of this world; you're not in Ylisse! Heh heh. He's freaking out and doesn't know how to react; I'm LAUGHING MY ASS OFF. Keep me amused, beloved reviewers. I'm not going to strike this down, I'll allow this gag to persist. I might even make a nod to it later. "So this one time, some reviewers on FFN decided to ship me with another fanfic writer..."  
I'm actually flattered, believe it or not. Never thought I'd have people shipping ME, except in my weirdest daydreams.**

**Edit: LOOK LOOK GUYS THIS IS FUNNY: **"[6/18/13 8:22:41 PM] Cam: WHY ARE YOU ENCOURAGING THE SHIPPING?!" **AHAHAHAHA IT'S FUNNY**

**Edit#2: I MEANT TO ASK! What pairings do you guys think will happen? SHIPPINGSPECULATIONGOGOGO**


	13. Insubordination Again

**Author's notes: Two more dreamers revealed, one being my volunteer. (Oh, this is gonna be funny later on.) ARE YOU EXCITED, GUYS? Okay.**

**I don't have music for this one, I was listening to some unfitting stuff the whole time. I'm also damn tired. Please let this chapter not be shit.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Aw, shit. Really?

As fucked up as Nin's sleeping schedule it, she just got seven hours of straight sleep. She should not be down like this. Her face is on her keyboard, for fuck's sake. Okay, I'll just kinda haul her to her bed. Fucking shit! People are heavy. I manage to flop her off her chair; her slumber is undisturbed.

I bend over her desk just a little and delete all of the keyboard mashings she just entered into her Word document. My eyes glance to the clock: 6:50. I have ten minutes before I fall asleep myself. This is not good. I shut off her computer and see about dragging Nin to bed.

I might be good at spearing people, but definitely not carrying them. And Nin's... Well, she's not exactly a stick like I am, so she's a job to haul. Ngghhhh... Okay. What's the time? Made it by three minutes. Three minutes to change into my pajamas, I can do this. Hurry!

I literally just crawled onto my bed and now I'm down. Fuck.

* * *

I'm running from tent to tent just for the sake of expending this nervous energy. My feet hit the dirt with serious gusto and kick up dust like a horse. Duck besides Sully, don't punch Robin. "Shit shit shit!"

Shio sees me and grabs my arm, stopping me. I stomp in place to keep burning energy. "Is something wrong?" THE CLUELESS LITTLE–

Panting and screaming: "Nin's a dreamer! She just fell asleep, I had to haul her into bed before falling asleep myself!" Everything's blurry, I have to find Nin, wherever she is, I have to make sure she's okay. Oh, gods, please, let her be okay. Please–

"Welp." Shio cuts across my thoughts.

Snap. "'WELP?!'" I scream and protest Shio's apparent lack of care. NIN IS IN DANGER WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU. "What the shit, Shio, I thought you–"

Welsh puts both hands on my shoulders to hold me in place and calm me down. He only achieves the former. "Hey, calm down, Shanz."

I take a quick, deep breath and blast him in the face with words: "ONE OF MY BEST FRIENDS IS POSSIBLY IN MORTAL DANGER, HOW CAN I–"

He lightly slaps me. "Stop having a panic attack."

I raise up a fist and punch him in the jaw; he tries to move to block but fails, not having seen that coming. I've knocked him onto the ground, and a shout follows him: "That's anxiety attack to you, fuckass!"

It finally hits Shio, the fucking slowpoke. "Oh gods." She approaches me and wraps her arms around me, forcing me to stay still so I can note the palpitations of my heart which are _not helping me relax!_ "She'll be fine, don't worry. Everything's going to be fine." Sure sure just keep your arms there and keep holding me and maybe I'll believe you. Oh, gods, Nin.

The baritone of Chrom's voice intersects my thoughts. "Is the whole camp in a panic?" He sounds worried WELL GUESS WHAT IF THEY WERE ALL ME THEN THEY WOULD BE!

"FOR THE LOVE OF THE GODS, IT'S A FUCKING ANXIETY ATTACK!" I scream at him. Okay, deep breaths... Calm your shit. Calm down. Okay. The palpitations are within normal range. Phew. Okay. Okay. I cover my face in shame.

I hear him sigh in relief, probably because it's just me, and I'm calming down. "You frightened me for a moment... I thought word had gotten out that our messenger hadn't returned." I look up at him, and... Wow, he's genuinely concerned. I just... Oh, crap, there went my words. Let me sum it up: It really touches me that he cares.

But this is still news to me, the messenger bit. "Well, thanks to you," I sigh tiredly, "it just did." I could just lose myself in those eyes... What a bright blue.

His eyes widen briefly, then he groans and slaps his forehead. "One of Emm's pegasus knights is missing... Don't tell anyone." I suppose he figured that in exchange for our secrecy, we ought to know the full details. Well, okay.

This bodes ill, but that's dead obvious. "It looks like Gangrel broke the rule of 'don't shoot the messenger...'" So... Free pegasus? Can I have it?

In palpable consternation, Chrom shushes me. "Can I ask you three not to spread it around? That could hurt morale." Welsh and Shio nod, and I just know Welsh was going to say some smart-ass remark like "I dunno, how much are ya gonna pay me" if Shio hadn't elbowed him.

I draw myself up, possessing now the composure to do so without a friend's comforting embrace. "No problem, boss... Just don't tell anyone I just had an anxiety attack." Nobody needs to know I'm a wimp. I did NOT use to have these.

Chrom nods, relieved. "Fair trade." He turns and walks away, his tattered cape swishing along the way. If I didn't have this badass fucking coat, I'd want a cape, myself.

A staggered sigh escapes my lungs. "Ohh," I groan, eager to sooth my nerves, "I can't wait until the battle..."

* * *

Why the hell did Robin decide to put me on the front line?

I appreciate the proximity to Chrom– it has a hell of a calming effect on my nerves– but I just know I'm going to get killed or seriously injured. I mean, come on. Really, Robin? You're just begging me to do something stupid.

I try not to show my doubts on my face. I'm trying to stand at attention stoically, you know, heels together, spear slightly off the ground. I mean, I'm standing with the other Shepherds, and we're right behind Chrom and trying to stare down the Plegians. So, impressive military stance? Must-have. Show no fear, doubts, that kind of crap. Be offensive, not defensive.

Chrom is just quietly observing the parley, having nothing to say. He's already said he sucks with negotiations, so he probably figures he'd just botch this if he opened his mouth. As for why my eyes are on him, he's our fearless leader; the general rule is to do as he does. His head turns around a little, his attention drifting to the scenery. Good idea... If there were archers or something hidden in the rocks and bushes, it'd be a dumb idea to not look for them. Wait, he looks surprised, no, slightly astonished... (you know I'm bored when I'm nitpicking over diction.) "Is that our messenger?" I hear him mumble. I follow his gaze, trying to find what he's staring at. "That's her pegasus... No, the rider's not in the uniform..." Finally, he sighs and resigns himself to it. "Safe to say our messenger's dead, then."

Where is this pegasu– Ah, found it. Yep, that's not the PK uniform, that's... "Wait..." Good god. That's a printed blue T-shirt and green fluffy pants, little white spots. Brown hair that barely meets the shoulder, flat nose, the glare of glasses... "Holy fuck."

Chrom glances behind him, having heard me swear. "Hm?" I imagine my tone of voice boded ill, like I'd seen a hidden ambush or something. Nope...

That's gotta be... There's no way... This is going to suck. This is going to suck immensely. "HOLY FUCK."

Next to me, Shio tries to see what I'm looking at. "Shanz, what is it–"

"HOLY MOTHERFUCK, IT'S NINEEYENA!" I briefly hesitate, wondering what to do. Inform Robin? No, no, be furtive, generally a bad idea. Make excuse later, when you have all the details.

"Who?" Chrom asks, waving a hand to try and quiet me. After all, there are negotiations going on!

Robin notices me getting twitchy, and calls out a moment too late: "Shanzira, don't– SHANZIRA!"

I've already bolted. "NINNY!" I have to reach her before anyone else, or she's dead! I can't let the Plegians near her! Oh my fuck oh my gods Nin, please live, please be okay, I don't see any red, please don't die!

I hear the sound of Gangrel's surprisingly smooth voice, delight evident: "Well, hello, is that one of your soldiers trespassing in Plegian territory? My my, Your Shininess... Such dogs need to be PUNISHED! GAHAHA! Soldiers, the Emblem, if you please!" Good gods, why is his voice sexy?!

No, don't stop, keep running! Get to Nin, NOW! I hear a thud and Chrom's voice: "Stay back, or you'll share his fate!"

"What a perfect declaration of war!" Gangrel guffaws. "Control your dogs better, Your Sparkliness; these ladies of yours will be responsible for the fall of House Ylisse if you're not careful! ... What am I saying?" This comes with a brief bark of laughter: "They already are!"

I slide to a stop in front of the pegasus, notably winded. I look up at my roommate, ignoring the overpowering urge to bend over and heave. "Nin, are you–"

OUCH! WHO JUST SLAPPED ME?! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU! Or I would, if I weren't short of breath and on the ground right now! I look up and regard a tall asshole with a messed up nose and brownish-red hair. Oh, and he wields a sword and shield, I see. "Do you even REALIZE what the fuck you just did?!" He screams at me in... Why does that accent ring bells?

I painstakingly stand, screaming at my stomach to stay unknotted. "You, shut up! I'm getting my friend to safe territory and YOU CAN'T STOP ME! Nin!" I regard my friend again. "You need help flying?"

She gets my idea, that she ought to fly to Chrom's army for safety. "Well... Riding a pegasus can't be that different from riding a horse..." Yeah, but there are still two new directions you have to deal with: Up and down. Better teach her. I begin to climb aboard the saddle behind Nin.

"Excuse me," yells a panicking Mr. Tall (I don't have anything better to call him! Besides, he really is tall!), "but what about me?!" What the hell is WITH his accent? What is it? Arrrgghhh! It's on the tip of my tongue, but I can't identify it!

I start to strap Nin in, because she was only sitting atop the pegasus (if it flew upside down, she'd have fallen off). "You can't exactly ride a pegasus," and this comes out while I'm busy with my fingerwork, "girls only."

In a more peaceful situation, his panicked squawk would be humorous: "You'd just leave me to fucking die here?!"

"You'll burn out your vocal cords if you're not careful." Coolly and cruelly. Aw, shit, this is going to bite me in the ass _so hard._

The unnaturally high pitch of his response both amuses and unnerves me. "You bitch!"

I hesitate. Shit, I... Damn it, why do I have to be moral?! "Oh, the hell with it. Nin," I say as I hope off, "you pull the reins up or down to go in those directions, otherwise it's just like riding a horse." My feet meet the ground; I don't crumple to it, unlike the last time I rode one of these suckers. "Get going!"

Startled: "Eh?! Okay!" I slap the winged horse's butt; she flies off before the tall guy can protest. He proceeds to do so anyways.

"What did you just do, you idiot?!"

I turn to face him, chest out and heels together, at attention. I take his appearance in, or rather, his clothes: Chainmail over a black tunic, with blue pants, white gloves, and brown boots. Guy has no color sense whatsoever. I scoff at him. "I can't protect two people at once. Nin can reach Chrom's army faster than either of us on our own can, so she'll be safest."

His eye twitches. "... You're a fucking idiot."

I turn around, assuming a ready position with my spear. "I have paragon, I level like a ninja."

"Wait," he stumbles in shock, "you're–"

"A dreamer, yes." Straighten out; no enemies too close by, so no point in exhausting myself. "Figured you were as well from your accent. What is that, Scottish?" Finally, I can get a clue as to what the fuck it is!

"Yes, actually." SCORE FOR ME! I'M _NOT_ A TOTAL DUMBASS! "What's your name?"

Still watching for Plegian soldiers, I answer, "call me Shanzira. Or Shanz, Shanzy... Nobody uses the full name except Robin. And you? Nobody goes by their real names here, so you might as well pick a nickname."

He sounds slightly surprised at this. "Really? Well, I can work with this. Uh, Eldrad."

Well met, Eldrad. "Okay." Ah, there are a few mooks coming down the cliff at us. But they're not too close, so I don't bother with my stance just yet.

"It's a 40K reference, don't worry about it." Whatever the hell 40K is. Wait, I remember this one guy saying he was into it.

"Only heard about it from an internet friend. A tabletop rpg of some sort?" Didn't he say it was Warhammer or something?

Eager to explain, he takes in a breath. "It's–" But then he sees the Plegians come within twenty paces of us, so he stops himself. "Sod that, we have work to do."

A tactical question crosses my mind: "Tomes or spears, tomes or spears... Tomes!" I dig the blade of my spear into the dirt and whip out my thunder tome. Kill as many as I can from a distance, then pull out the spear. Okay. Chant, lightning crackles along my arm, then shoots out at them (so different from the game! It's so much cooler, too. I could squee). ZZZAP. I fire as many of these bolts as I can before the ones still alive reach me. They're almost here, crap, I can't put away my tome fast enough, okay why is my spear stuck, I didn't jam it in that hard, shit, shit, shit–

And then the two going after me reel, having been slammed in the face with a shield. That was Eldrad? Welp, looks like– oh, damn, there's a spike on that sucker. And one of those Plegians got stabbed with it. Nice... Ew, blood. Okay, just, um, grab your damn spear, Shanz, and get to work shanking these guys. Yoink. Stabby Mcstab... Haven't I made that joke already? Yeah, be pretty lame to make it twice. Butt-spike the face, back to my impaling spree. Now that my spear's free of the ground, I can move, and I attempt to turn the skirmish so we can make our way to Chrom's army for assistance (and protection). I've felled six soldiers, Eldrad two, and I'm in much better shape than him: I've got a nick to the knee, he's bleeding from the shoulder– the shoulder opposite his shield, mind.

I offer him a vulnerary in a moment of respite. "That shield of yours reminds me of a story I once read. How's it so ridiculously OP?" The damn thing is unbreakable, and it's a cross between a buckler and a heater, but round, like a kite shield. (Take a trip to Wikipedia if you're confused.)

He shrugs then winces due to his wound, gladly taking the salve and applying it. "It just is. I found it in some ruins in Plegia."

Sigh. "Robin's going to have a field day. Come on, we're almost there!" I straighten myself out, noting that the Ylissean front line is closer, and I grab Eldrad's hand and pull him forward. Arrows bounce– yes, _bounce–_ off his shield as we approach, but one lodges itself in my leg. "FUCK!" With a great deal of effort, I keep running, ignoring the pain lancing up and the sticky blood spreading through the fabric of my jeans. (Yeah, I'm wearing jeans. Hush. No one needs to know.)

Frederick, Stahl, and Sully all ride forward to escort us back, presumably on Robin's orders. Frederick picks me up; Sully, Eldrad. We're plopped down a short ways behind the line, and the cavaliers ride off to rejoin the fray. Robin storms over to me, fuming.

I preempt her defensively. "Sorry about that!"

She picks me up by the front of my shirt, damn she's strong. And tall. "You should be! Do you have no regard for your own life?!" Ah, it's the arrow in my leg she's pointing at. Well, at least it didn't hit my torso, that could've done damage to my organs.

"Look," aw, crap, every time I preface something with that word it means I've been cornered, and I generally try to avoid that appearance, "she's–" I point to where Nin is, still sitting on her pegasus behind all the soldiers– "a friend of mine, and I want to keep her safe!"

Chrom booms above either of us; damn, guys can be loud when they want to. With one gloved hand, he directs our attention to the nearby slaughter. "We can argue about this later, right now, we have a battle to win!"

"And I somehow get ignored," Eldrad sighs.

I stop myself from slapping him for that. "Don't complain, just fight!" I toss him towards the fray, unable to move much for the dAMN ARROW IN MY LEG GODS DAMN IT LISSA! Why does that have to HURTEFGTDNDFNJKLC IT _ITCHES!_ Didn't I resolve never to get shot again?! Ugh! I'm so stupid, I let this happen! This is _exactly_ like the night we found Shio!

Regardless, I can stand now and the bleeding's stopped. I rise to my feet, ignoring the heat and tightness in my quadriceps. My hand meets Lissa's pigtails, then I raise my spear and dive into the fray. Pretty sure I see Ricken and Maribelle on a ledge up there, and we need to save their asses. I rope Shio, Welsh, and Eldrad into helping me with this. Four out of five dreamers, fighting together... And we'll have to be sure to teach Nin to fight. I'd like the five dreamers to be epically awesome and worthy of song. I can see it now, though I'll probably be the one to pen it. Or Nin will, she's an epic writer.

Eldrad, being the one with the indestructible shield, is at the fore; I stand to the right, Welsh to the left, and Shio's behind us, casting magic. We push our rhombus up the cliff, past the soldiers, come on, we're nearly there!

Once they're close enough to shout to, I yell: "RICKEN, MARIBELLE, GET OVER HERE! WE'LL ESCORT YOU TO SAFETY!"

Maribelle's practically fuming at the thought of taking my orders, but she pulls Ricken onto her horse– where the hell did that thing come from, does she keep it stuffed in hammerspace?– and rides to us, and we reform our rhombus around her and begin a hasty sojourn back. Although Eldrad, Welsh, and I have picked up a few wounds, they're nothing serious, and we're still able to fight when we get back.

Or maybe not. My legs just buckled underneath me. "Fuck!" I guess I was more tired than I thought! Damn it. Okay, fine! I'll just CRAWL back to find Lissa, and she'll heal me. Okay, healed. I sit on the ground, and I hear footsteps and hoofsteps approach. Hello, Nin.

"Shouldn't you be fighting?" Damn, how scared are you, buddy? I've never heard you speak with such a high pitch.

I pant by way of answering, "Exhausted." A few seconds pass as I catch my breath before I ask, "how're you holding up?" Tilt head to see her.

Her arms are wrapped around her torso, and her knees and toes are meeting. "I got shot at once or twice, but they all missed." Okay, wow. She's... terrified. I need to help her. I keep forgetting she has anxiety, too... I'm an idiot.

If nothing else, though, she's unwounded. "Good." I stand up, satisfied with my respite. Looks like my legs recovered, too. "I need to rejoin the battle."

When she calls after me, she's almost weeping: "Don't die, Shanzira!"

I swear to you, Nin, I won't. I swear to you, Shio, and Welsh that I will survive this fight.

I run up to find Sumia, and she lets me clamber onto Caeda. "Sorry about that shenanigan." That was me.

"I w–was really scared, Shanzira... YAH!" She pulls the reins back, then rushes forward and impales a shellfish knight. She's so timid, yet so fierce. What an oxymoron.

I don't really have anything to say, so I stow my spear and sling spells for a while. The chants keep my mouth busy and do a good job of forestalling awkward conversations I'd rather not have.

We receive the command to lay down arms just as my wind tome breaks. Looks like we've won. Thank the gods... I can't believe I'm still awake. Sumia is kind enough to provide me with a lift back to our camp.

* * *

I've collapsed in my tent and I lay sprawled on my bedroll as Robin enters. Ah, this is it. She's about to give me a tongue-lashing for repeating the same damn insubordination. "You did it again."

With some effort, I nod my head. "I know. My deepest apologies... But I couldn't live with myself if anything happened to her. She's my friend... I owe her a lot." It's no excuse, though. But I still had to do it.

Robin's quiet ire is actually far more frightening than her blustery screaming. "I'd confine you to your room in the barracks if we hadn't just started a war." If _I_ hadn't just started a war. Gods... I'm in for it this time.

Let's make Cordelia jealous with this sigh. "I'll accept any punishment you see fit to dispense, but understand, Robin," I pause here, roll over, and stuff a pillow beneath my head so I can look at Robin, "I'll have a hell of a time holding myself back if I see a friend in danger like that again."

She draws in a breath to calm herself. It was slight, but I noticed it. "I'm tempted to ask Chrom to let you go."

"Kick me out?" Please. She wouldn't do that. "You need every able fighter you can get, Robin, and Chrom knows that." But I shouldn't push my luck.

"I'll defer with him. In the meantime, you're not fighting for a while." Yup. Figures.

"Unless you need me," I amend.

Reluctantly: "Unless we need you."

I nod. "Understood." With a few brisk steps, Robin exits our tent, likely to go find Chrom. "Well, fuck." I'm acting like my godsdamn brother, aren't I?

* * *

**When I asked you guys what pairings you thought were a thing, I was asking what you think I'm going with, not the pairings you picked in your games. You guys have been hilariously wrong.**

**ALSO YES MY VOLUNTEER IS G2G. I like to write people who I know well– I don't even know how long we've been chatting but it sums up quite a few hours– and natch, I picked him. Besides, GRAVITY GAGS.**

**Review, as always! Thank you!**

**EDIT: Turns out Nin knows how to ride a horse. Edited for accuracy.**


	14. Matters of the Heart

**Author's notes: After planning stuff out for a bit, I've finished the next chapter. The support density is going to rise a lot, I've been really lazy because there are A TON OF CONVERSATIONS WHICH NEED TO HAPPEN. I regret promising everyone else's conversations, since fanfiction looks down on script-type chapters with no description, and I do not look forward to adding fluff to the other dreamers. Well, it'll be an exercise in viewing the world from someone else's eyes. Sigh.**

**Three supports happen in here, one not being mine. The support log is about to get some serious bumpage.**

**G2G and I have stopped the stupid update war, it kinda killed both of us. Updates will happen at their regular schedule again. Enjoy the read!**

* * *

I know I've been pretty much benched from the team for a while, but I'm still smiling like a dumbass.

I'm lying on my bed in my dorm, noting that Nin is not in her computer chair like she normally would be. I always associate her with that thing. Now, however, she's finally been parted from it by one thing.

"So Nin," I try to hide my glee as I speak, "how was your first day?"

She groans. Loudly. More controlled giggles from me. Sucker. "Don't remind me," are the first words she ekes out past the pained groans.

I take a deep breath to steady myself. "Still sore?" I'm still grinning, but not so much. I should probably be a bit nicer to her when she's down, instead of kicking her like a dog.

"You don't even know." Oh, love, please. I've been in your situation before. _I know._

I get out of my bed to properly comfort her and I get to see her curled on her bed, and she's so cute, awwww. "It gets better after a week. Trust me! And you'll probably lose a few pounds, then gain 'em back once you develop muscle." I lightly tap her arms. They're so flabby, so cute. All she does is groan back.

I'd better remember this sight, I'm probably never going to see her out of shape after this. She's like me, very good at improving herself when she wants to be. I suppose I ought to turn that willpower of mine towards not disobeying orders on the battlefield, or at least, not acting outside orders. Otherwise, I'm going to become really wimpy from being benched.

...

I wonder if the night of Emmeryn's assassination counts as "we need you, Shanz, come help us." It probably does, since it's the Exalt's life in the balance. Good. I get to pull my prank on Validar. Oh, I can't wait...

* * *

I was calmly, leisurely whistling as I was drawing, and as the end of the song I whistled came up (Garden where the Celestite Lies, from Radiant Historia) it occurred to me to whistle a song I have had a great deal of trouble with before, as anyone who has attempted it would know VERY WELL.

That song is from Homestuck, and it is named "Minihoof's Adventure". It. Is. Hell.

I'm going to hate myself, I think as I prepare to start. I lay down the quill, inhale air, and go.

HOLY SHIT THESE NOTES THEY BOUNCE ALL OVER THE PLACE HIGH LOW LOW HIGH MEDIUM HIGH LOW OH MY GOD AND IT'S SO FAST–PACED WHY DID I COMMIT TO THIS?!

Lissa, no, please! "Ooh, I like that tune. What is it?" NO CRAP I CAN'T STOP NOW, I HAVE A LISTENER.

A pause comes up for a few beats, and I use it to take a deeeeeeep breath, really quickly. I also answer her question: "Really fuckin' hard to whistle!" And then it resumes and FUCK IT'S WORSE THAN DANCING TO A FAST SONG AND YOUR PARTNER IS GOING AT TWICE YOUR SPEED! IT SUCKS!

And Lissa is just fucking dancing to it! Look at her, she's playing with her hoops skirt, waving it around, and oh my gods she's keeping up with this ridiculous tempo. How is she doing this? This is bananas.

Chrom, who was just walking by, pauses, seeming to agree. He watches intently, utterly baffled by this scene. "... Lissa?" The sound of his voice is like he's inquiring for her sanity, it's a tone I like to hear. "What are you..." He turns to me. "Shanz, are you whistling that?"

I nod by way of answer, fuck if I'm interrupting myself. I don't have any music to keep pace with, so I daren't stop.

Chrom's brow furrows and his eyes widen, minimizing the distance between them. That is the best face. "This is..." Awesome? "This is ridiculous." He shakes his head. "I'm going to sit and watch." And he plants his butt on the ground. Well! This is absolutely stupid, yet you're amused by it? HA! I'll call you out on that later! I guess I really am an American, I can entertain people with the dumbest of shit.

Chrom is only the first to show up. Vaike pauses to see the show, Virion decides to marvel, Sumia altogether stops what she's doing just to see this, Miriel pushes up her glasses with a "fascinating," Donnel appears in the crowd as well, Sully pops up, and Ricken is the last to arrive before I finish.

Upon stopping the final note, I bend over and gasp for air. Minihoof's Adventure is hell... "Oh my gods finally... That song... That fucking song." I straighten out and lean back against my tent wall (which isn't really solid?)

"Over already?" Lissa sounds disappointed, I don't think she's even tired. What the everliving hell, Chrom, she has more energy than the rest of us put together. How did your sister even get this way?

"Already?" I repeat weakly. "Lissa, that song is fucking impossible and painful as all hell to whistle. This was far from my first attempt." Stop me now. You're about to descend into hell. It's worse than listening to Miriel ramble about SCIENCE! or something such.

I hear a small chuckle from the crowd, from the hard-to-miss alto that is Sully. "Fine whistler, then, if it's so hard."

"So... many... key changes... It couldn't be a scale, it couldn't be an arpeggio, no, the notes are so far apart on the staff it hurts to switch..." I could just flop myself onto the ground right now. My jaw muscles hurt sooooo much...

"Do it again!"

Oh my gods Lissa. Why. Why must you request my torture? WHY?

You know what, fine, let's fuck myself over. "Against my better judgement..." I pant reluctantly. I take a deeeep breath, straighten my spine, and pick the song up from the top. This is going to hurt immensely. Lissa cheers and goes to resume her dance. She gets all of ten seconds– ten painful, agonizing seconds– before Maribelle comes in a saves me, bless her soul.

"Lissa!" She cries, panicked for her best friend's honor (just look at the way she's embarrassing herself!) "No need for such humiliating buffoonery! Come with me this instant!" She grasps the princess's wrist and begins to haul her away.

There's just one little protest Lissa gets out without seeming rude. "Awww..."

I stop whistling and lie back, happy it's over. You have no idea. I'm going to be rubbing my cheeks for five minutes straight before they stop hurting. Ugh... "Thank the gods..."

And the disappointed crowd scatters. I imagine the sight of me lying there wasn't very entertaining, except perhaps to a few of the men with dirty minds. Perhaps I ought to carry my spear at all times so I can whack them. Wait, that's a great way to break my spear. Okay, butt-spike them. It doubles as combat practice! Wow.

I hear the applause of one person, judging from the low pitch of it, a dude or someone else with big hands. "I didn't realize you knew so much about music." Oh, Chrom. I sit, stand, and look at him, because it's just rude to lie there when the prince himself is addressing you.

He's genuinely interested, I didn't realize I was that good. Thanks! But heap praise on everyone else or I'll feel like the only competent person around here, please. So, I justify my musical knowledge– which seriously isn't all that much– with "I used to sing in a choir once upon a time. I have pipes." I did not actually learn much about music in that class, just enough to get by. I can only sight-sing a scale or arpeggio, but stuff that jumps, like Minihoof's Adventure, would be murdered. Sadly.

"Pipes, hm?" Chrom smiles. "I'd like to hear you sing sometime."

Now there's an idea. "I'd be singin' for the whole camp, boss, you'd have a job missing it." I should sing every night or so to raise morale! That would be genius, and I could put myself to use while Robin has me benched. "Since I'm not allowed to fight for a while, I'm gonna be stuck doing that for a while, to raise morale."

"Not allowed to fight?" Chrom tilts his head, confused. Huh? "Because you ran out into the battlefield on your own and..."

I look away when I finish for him. "Started a war? Yeah. I thought Robin was going to talk with you over it." So did she? Judging from his face, I'd say not.

He scratches his head. "Actually, I haven't seen her for a while... Every time I try to approach her, she blushes and runs away." Nice shrug, boss. Haven't seen anyone who can move their shoulders like that.

At any rate, I just figured out why this is all so. "OH. That's because I," I hesitate here; Chrom's a victim of this as much as Robin is, "played a prank on her a few days ago. Here." I duck inside my tent hastily and run out with a copy of the shipping I drew and posted. I hold it out for him to take and examine.

He looks at it for a full minute, his face becoming progressively more red. At last, he opens his mouth and squawks in protest: "You drew this?! Why?!" Whoa, I haven't seen rage in those eyes ever. That... that makes me pause for a moment.

"Uh," I stumble. "A prank. You weren't the intended target, I promise." Shanzira, you need to improve your recovery there. You might piss him off. "The joke is that you two look really close, and not to mention, good with each other." Thankfully, he looks more embarrassed than pissed.

He resumes his bluster, and I have to keep a straight face; it's actually pretty funny to see. "For– Shanz, Robin and I are only friends! I don't have any romantic intentions towards her!" Sure, sure you don't. Just you wait, boss. Juuuust yoouuu waaaiiit.

I shake my head, a slight grin prevailing against my poker face. "That doesn't matter to me. The whole purpose of this prank is to suggest something ridiculous and watch you guys react." I pause and think about how it all went. "I scored an A with this one." Aaaand then I don a full-on smirk. Dammit.

Chrom's dumbfounded. All he can really say is, "I think I know why Robin's so angry with you..."

Aaaand that wonderful reminder that I'm still in hot water changes my smile to that of the nervous type. "Yeah, I haven't been nice lately." I puff up to justify my behavior with some delicious philosophy: "I generally try to live life to the fullest. A day without laughter is a day wasted."

He shakes his head at me. "Don't take it to an extreme." With that, he walks away, presumably to vent his embarrassment on the sparring fields.

I'm really surprised. He just let me off with a warning. That was... Surprisingly gentle. Well, I'll take his advice. I don't want to legitimately piss off the boss. No more pranks on him! I'll take care to be more accurate with them, so I actually hit my damn marks.

Well, I'll just liiightly tease him... I pick up my practice spear and make for the training grounds, myself. Besides, if I'm going to be protecting Emm on the night of her assassination, I'm going to need a shitload of practice, particularly if I'm not allowed to fight until then. Chrom's not around, I guess he was headed somewhere else. Oh well, I can get something productive out of this. What's the best way to get in serious business practice? ... Train with Sully and Frederick. Yep, I'm signing up to be murdered, but I'll be grateful for it later on.

First, Frederick. Need to wear myself out. He's about to start one of his fitness hours (lucky me) so I get to seriously ditch all my energy on this crap. Okay! Time for crunches, push-up, jumping jacks, and... Oh gods, the list goes on. Somebody kill me now. Why did I join in? WHY?!

I suffer through a solid hour– A solid fucking hour!– of torture before I crawl away, roll over, and curl into a sitting position. Can I even spar with Sully in such a state? Well, she seems to still be alive, so... Welp. Don't crap out now, Shanz. Get your fucking ass off the ground and do it. You can't get stronger if you don't push yourself.

Turns out Sully's still just as fast as she normally is when she's exhausted. Makes sense; she's been doing this for far longer, she's had serious opportunity to build up her stamina. If I weren't screaming at myself to not be a fucking wimp, I would have just given up after the first hit.

So instead, I wave the white flag after the tenth hit. I crawl away from her, trying to preserve my precious energy, while she smirks, picks up her gear, and tromps off.

How does anyone survive that? I am so hopelessly outclassed against these guys... I lie down, sprawling on my back.

"Shanzira?" Oh, it's Sumia standing over me. Hard to see, the sun's in my eyes.

"Myeah, what is it...?" I mumble. Do I really need to reiterate that I'm fucking dead? More dead than I thought I was after we saved Shio?

"I– I was..." She sits down, cross-legged, beside me. "I was wondering if you might help me with something." Jeebus priest, girl. You don't have to be so timid about a request. I should knock some confidence into you.

I close my eyes so as to shut out the sun. "What do you need?"

"Well," she starts, not eased by my apparent shutting her out (closing my eyes), "I'm sure you know that I need to get better at fighting..."

Are you shitting me? She's a godsdamn badass on that pegasus. Then again, she can't see that she's actually pretty awesome. "We all do. But Sumia," I pause for breath here, "you're one of our best. You're fine at this pace."

"Wait, I was..." Another moment of hesitation, gods these are frustrating. Spit it out! "I wanted to know if you would help me train, since you're really good at this, and you haven't been here very long." What, does she expect me to share the secret of Paragon? I have no damn clue how I even got that skill.

"'Really good'?" I quote. "My dear Sumia, you exaggerate." I sit up slightly. "If we didn't have Sully and Frederick around to beat the crap out of everyone, I'd be just as pathetic as the next villager." Oh, gods, how I would be... At any rate, it's not as if Paragon is a share-able thing. Pretty sure only my kid(s) will get it, and that's if I can even HAVE kids. I don't even know. The whole Dreamer deal is confusing and badly thought-out. Who even made this crap up?

"But I've noticed," she sounds like she's picking up energy and confidence AT LAST, "when you train, you don't give up until you can't stand anymore. You train until you hit your limit. Can you teach me how to do that?" You mean like I just did? Oh, gods, Shanz, remember that 150 squats you tried after your first week of the Twilight Knights? 150 squats, and I was out of shape. I could barely stand after finishing that. The friend I was Skyping with remarked on my lack of sanity for attempting such idiocy. But it got results.

"Sumia," I start with a sigh and a heave for air, "it's as simple as refusing to accept weakness. I simply scream at myself not to give up whenever I start getting tired. Look at the results." I weakly wave an arm in the air. Yeah, what results? I can't even move. I need to train more... Once I recover, of course. I'm going to be _so_ sore.

"Well... Okay, if you say so, I'll try it." Maybe this will work. Should I go drill-sergeant on her? It might help. Then again, Chrom would kill me, I'm pretty sure they have a support by now. Nah, I'll defer that role to someone who can get away with it.

"And Frederick's stupid fitness hours help, too." Oh gods, what horrifying fate did I just doom her to?

Her (quite justifiable) fear and hesitation is palpable in her stammering response: "O–oh... Well... Okay..."

Eager to save her, I add hastily, "not mandatory unless he sucks you into them, though."

She melts in relief, almost toppling over me. "Oh, thank goodness!" She picks herself up. "I'll see you later, Shanzira!" And with a trip, she dashes off to go do her own thing.

"Well," I reflect to myself, "that was odd. Well, I guess I'm becoming her teach– _fuuuuccckkk,_" I interrupt, disturbed by a new revelation, "I'm a senpai now... Okay, I think I can stand. Up!" And with a colossal effort, I pull one last sit-up, stand from this, and get walking. Better not let my muscles lock up, after all. Ugh... Okay, just... Just make it to your tent, Shanz. Oh look, Shio and Stahl talking about... Art. Sounds like Stahl's asking Shio to draw him. I dunno. I'm too tired to listen. I plop myself down in my tent and lie still for about an hour, then I try to draw. Hard work, though; my hands won't stop shaking.

I hear footsteps approaching my tent, and someone disturbs the flap. "Milady?"

I look up, recognizing that voice. "Hm? Oh, wow, Frederick, you didn't accidentally sneak up on me for once. What is it?" Am I in trouble? From the look on your face, I'd guess not. Okay. Looks like you just want to know something.

He steps inside and straightens out. It hits me right then that he's _in my damn tent._ DAMN IT, SHANZIRA, STOP DOING THIS TO YOURSELF. "I thought perhaps you might desire my assistance."

"W– with what? I have nothing to do right now but kill time." Kill time and hide that stupid lousy godsdamn blush on my face. Oh gods. Someone get him out. ROBIN! SAVE ME! Oh, wait, she wouldn't, she... Yeah, I pissed her off. SHIT.

Frederick averts his eyes from me, looking to the wall, but still facing me. "Then you might enjoy "killing time" with me?"

In a very painful (though involuntary) motion for my diaphragm, I mock a spit-take. I would've wrecked my sketchbook if I'd had water in my mouth. "Wh... Please clarify?"

"I had the notion of going into town with you and requisitioning supplies... At a relaxed pace, of course, so we might stop for lunch, perhaps?" His face, his face... It's like it bothers him to have to ditch the whole badass stern lieutenant shtick for even a moment. Either he is a DAMN good actor, or...

Stumbling, I try to test my hypothesis. "I– wha– Are you..." Okay, just start with his damn name. People like being called by their names. "Frederick, are you asking me on a date?"

Still avoiding my gaze, he nods his head. "Yes, milady. But if you are averse to the idea, we could instead–"

I interrupt him with a very important question. "So what will we get to eat?"

"I beg your pardon?" What, he's startled that I seem agreeable to this? Stop mirroring me.

I repeat myself at a slower pace, more clearly. "What kind of food will we eat for lunch?"

He stumbles, but recovers well. "I... I have heard of a restaurant skilled in the ways of pasta-making, if that interests you."

Ooh... I'm normally the type to shy away from love. Really. It really disturbs me that someone can effortlessly worm their way into my heart and then, if they choose to, wreak havoc on me. "You are... So tempting. Really. Not kidding. How'd you know pasta's my favorite? Don't answer that." Yes, he was about to answer. "This is just... I need a moment." I close my eyes, so as to shut him out.

I hear the clink of armor which suggest a bow. "Of course, milady. Would you have me leave, that you might think alone?"

My eyes bolt open. "No, gods, no! Just... Aw, wow." Let's face it, Shanz, you know your answer. "I'm not good at saying yes, am I? But umm, yeah, sure, I'll go." Okay, another important question to ask. "Should I wear anything special? I hate looking nice." Oh gods, do I. I know this is a tangent, but being caught in a nice outfit is extremely embarrassing to me. My therapist can speculate all she likes on the matter. (She's not the sort to speculate though.) ANYWAYS BACK ON TOPIC.

"No... If I might be bold, I daresay you are fair enough as is." Is that a blush? Holy shit, it is. I can't believe this.

I try to pull myself out of this, but I can't help it. The gravitational pull is too great. "Ngh... You can be... really charming when you want to be... Shall we leave right away?" I stand up, reenergized by this whole stupid embarrassing conversation.

He finally returns his gaze to me, apparently comforted some. "If that suits you."

I nod hesitantly. "All right, then, just let me grab my sketchbook." I bend over, pick it up, and collect my quill and inkwell. But there's one thing disturbing my mind– this feels waaaaay too good to be true.

I still feel like a kid being escorted someplace by an adult. Not kidding, not exaggerating. I'm so used to being treated like a kid (even though I'm twenty) that it's hard to stop thinking that way. I guess I really have trouble growing the hell up. Sigh.

We enter the closest town and first make for the armory. Frederick was thoughtful enough as to bring a pair of mules, so we don't have to do all the heavy lifting. (Not sure I could even handle a spear right now.) I point out which weapons look like crap, which ones appear to be in good condition, because let's face it, the Twilight Knights have trained me to have a good eye for this crap.

"This isn't a real killing edge. If it was, there would be bolts in the hilt to hold it together, but there aren't, you can see here. This thing will fall apart the moment it sees pressure of any kind." Because killing edges are pretty much katanas. I've only worked with them once or twice, they're the only steel weapons the Twilight Knights worked with at all. I thought they were heavy... And then I met real longswords.

Once the mules are loaded up, Frederick leads me to the pasta place he was referring to. Fettucine alfredo! Hell yes! I order this, a side of garlic bread, and devour heartily. All the while, Frederick eats his own food (meat lasagna) with a gentlemanly smile.

This is a million times better than that "date" with Inigo, even though I feel really nervous. This is actually sincere, back in Ferox I was just, um... Screw it, let's derail that train of thought now. Pasta! Mm! Yum! Eat up, Shanz!

* * *

A few hours later (when the sun is about to set), I happily plop myself into my bed, actually full for a change. Robin eyes me from her bedroll, having been disturbed from her tactical reading by my happiness.

"You look cheerful." I can tell the purpose of this statement is to begin a conversation in which I might spill the beans on why I'm so cheerful. So, I feed her vague statements.

"Yeah? Don't I always?" I roll over onto my back, a stupid smile gracing my features.

"More so than usual."

Okay, fine, Robin. I'll tell you a little bit. "I went on a date today. It was fun..."

Her eyebrows go up in surprise. I bet she didn't expect me to ever find a date, especially one who'd leave me in such a euphoria. "Well, congrats. With who?"

Haha! I'm not telling! "That's my secret, hee hee!" I let out a sigh, a contented one, unlike Cordelia's. "I could die happy..." Frederick, one of the most attractive guys here, asked me out...

"Well, don't die." Robin's warning of the obvious wakes me from my daydream. "We might need you sometime, because of this war." Well, nice to know she still cares.

"I'll do my best, madam." I roll over, grab my pillow, and curl around it, snuggling. A contented sleep finds me within minutes.

* * *

**By the way, I'm looking for good headcanons to use for this. I have a few, they're going to be so fun to play with. But yeah, the supports that happened are Shanzira/Sumia (C), Shio/Stahl (C), and Shanzira/Frederick (B), in that order. Anyways... Off I go to languish in my soreness! Katanas are surprisingly heavy, it hurts to swing them after for 2-3 hours. I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter!**

**EDIT: I screwed up! The song Shanz whistles is MINIhoof's adventure, not Maplehoof's. Oh my god, that's embarrassing. I'm sorry for the confusion!**


	15. Business of a Secretive Sort

**I feel like I'm updating with the speed of a slug, but at least I'm faster than G2G right now. Chapter 28 of Asleep is going to be a beast, apparently. -shrug-**

**Lots of yummy stuff here, and one thing that'll come as a surprise that's just casually dropped in one of Shanz's thoughts, not given "proper attention". She'll worry about it later, she has bigger and better things to not get killed over (like her "prank").**

**Next chapter we have an actual fight scene. So much yummy stuff will happen. I wonder if I can time its release with that of Asleep's Ch. 28?**

* * *

Remember when I said I was too gleeful to regret being benched? Well, now that I'm bored as hell and missing out on good exp, I'm eating my words. I know "empty camp" translates to "prank opportunities," but I got nothing. Well, okay, the camp isn't empty, there are a few soldiers left behind to guard the place (Like me. Aren't I lucky), but largely, it's a ghost camp.

Funny how I should mention that while everyone else is out slaughtering Risen. Yeah, we haven't arrived at the palace yet, so it's not like we're about to face Validar or anything. I'm going to join in that fight, damn the rules. Pretty sure it qualifies as being "they need me enough that it doesn't matter if I'm supposed to be benched".

At least I'm not alone– Nin's here. Ah, that's right, I meant to take this time to teach her how to fight so that she's actually useful when we save Emmeryn. Ok. I make a beeline for her tent.

I poke my head in and there she is, sitting inside and reading, looks like a story of some kind. "So, Nin, while everyone else is out slaughtering Risen, you're stuck with me. Fun?"

She closes the book so as to focus on my voice. "I guess."

What a lack of enthusiasm, though I've never known Ninny to be enthusiastic. "I guess?" I tilt my head. "Hm. Well, it's time I taught you to fight! Pick a weapon, any weapon." She understands the choices she has, at any rate.

Without missing a beat: "Tomes."

Figured she picked that. "Tomes it is! Here ya go." I hand her the thunder tome I had Robin buy back in Ferox... And now I'm unarmed but for my spear. "Want a crash course in how they work?"

She nods. "I'd appreciate that."

I stand to a silly salute, go "yes'm!" and plop myself down next to her and open the book up. I explain the basics, because I know I'm the only one of my friends who ever did the research on how tomes work. This reminds me of when I had Ricken teach me magic, huh. Well, useful that those teachings can be passed on. After a few minutes of theory, I drag Nin out to shoot some lightning bolts. It goes well, she's a friggin' natural.

I have awesome friends, I think as she obliterates a target. Look at all that potential. I might want to pick up some holy water or something for that fight... Holy crap, I should do that. If only I still had mental notes to stick everywhere (A bunch of stickies I use to remember things. Really useful for writing). We probably have some in the convoy or something.

After another target bursts into flames from high voltage, I say to my esteemed pupil, "Well done, Ninny. I think you'll survive the next fight."

Stretching, she inquires, "Which fight is it again?" She still hasn't picked her game up again, has she? I'll nag her about it in the morning.

I consider using this as a chance to nag her, but instead I just provide helpful exposition. "The one where Marth turns out to be a chick and you save Emmeryn's butt." ... Why did I have to answer in slang?

Her eyes light up as she remembers. "Oh, that one. Okay." She nods to signify her understanding.

"Now," I plan out loud, "I think I'll go find the convoy and see if I can't pilfer some better weaponry."

She stares at me, questioning my sanity (with good reason!). "Why?"

I smirk evilly and pull her along. "I have a plan in mind. If I told you, you'd call me crazy." As if she didn't think it already.

She accepts the fact that I'm dragging her without protesting. "Well, Shanz, everyone already knows you're crazy. Even Chrom does, and he's a little... Well."

A little what? Go on, what are you about to say about the boss? "Really? He doesn't treat me any different." Yeah, for the sake of diplomacy... Better not have said what I thought.

I feel her hand tug upwards, signifying a shrug. "That's just how he treats crazy people, like everyone else."

Hello, callback. "Why am I reminded of Ike? Laguz and Beorc, he treated them all the same." Although, everyone says he's much more like Eliwood. I understand, but Eliwood didn't have the dark side of getting pissed every now and then and trying to forget the damn rules just to satisfy his want for revenge. Eliwood was all mope, no bite. Chrom? He's half and half. Ike, all bite and no mope.

I think Lyndis is closer, personally.

"Here's the convoy," Nin says, pulling me out of my fan theories. Let's just say that Chrom is Chrom and he's unlike the rest of the lords.

But anyways... The convoy. Right. Sweetness. "Excellent!" I lunge in headfirst, whoa I just narrowly dodged a haphazardly placed axe. Hello, that's a good tome! "Ooh, here, have an Elthunder!" I throw it out behind me; sounds like Nin caught it. "Because I just found an–" I dig myself out of the pool of arms, luckily without cutting myself, "ARCthunder!" I hold it up to the sky, Zelda-style.

Ninny glances from side to side, probably to check for returning Shepherds. "Are you sure Robin won't mind?"

With one dainty hand, I wave her fears away. "I'll talk it over with her, it'll be fine. I room with her, remember?" Famous last words... Heh.

Aaaand she goes on a bit of a tangent (not that I never do so myself). "I room with Shio..."

On the other hand, this is very good info to know. "Well, good. You're with another dreamer."

"She draws the weirdest things." Why does she sound somewhat creeped out?

"Yeah, I know. She's my best friend, I know her like the back of my hand." I don't get what would make Ninny react this way–

She shudders, what the hell? "There's fridge horror in that stuff..." OH. Yeah. Shio DOES have a morbid sense of humor.

I shrug at Nin. "You get used to it." The conversation lulls for a few minutes, I can't really think of anything to say, nor does Nin really care to talk much (she's quite laconic, unlike me). So, we wander away together, to the edge of camp. Over some time, we see figures against the horizon, and I know that this means: Either everyone got wiped out by Risen and we're next, or: "Hey, everyone's coming back!" Sure enough, the Shepherds begin marching past us. I stop Shio. "How'd it go?"

She shrugs. "Welsh and Lon'qu are now buddies. Welsh saved him from an axe."

You're kidding. What? "Welsh saved Lon'qu? You sure it's not the other way around?" How did Lon'qu require someone else's help when he's a fucking badass? Oh, man, I should try and support with hi– Wait, I already have a boyfriend.

Shio shakes her head. "Nope. Lon'qu's not happy with himself." And we're both smirking. I love my best friend, have I said that? I make the best buddies. I have Shio to crack me up, and a total hottie as my boyfriend. As much as I'd love to dote on him, though, he literally just asked me out days ago, I think it's too early in the relationship to try that.

Mm, Frederick.

I return my thoughts to the two cute, dark-haired guys who are not my boyfriends. "Aw, poor sucker. Anyways, I have to get before Robin catches me with the most powerful tome in the convoy." (I just saw her come over the hill with Chrom.) "BYE-YA!" I dash off, stuffing the tome into my pockets, trying to get it into a position where it doesn't give itself away.

Okay, I've proven I can stealth. I can also butcher the English language. It seems like nobody in California these days can English properly. Oh well. I'm in Ylisse right now, not California. I know I've said this a thousand times before, but it really does feel like something out of a dream, or more accurately, something out of a daydream. My dreams, before I started dreaming here, were normally really... Boring. I literally once dreamed that my mom gave me my allowance for once. It's really easy to mix them up with reality.

My daydreams, on the other hand, are always far more outlandish, and usually have a quality of, um, wish fulfillment involved. Yeah, I know, fucking selfish of me. But hey... They're my private daydreams, and I actually get good ideas from them. Good ideas for fluff, at least. ... Shut up, don't you dare remark on that. Why do I have to be such a selfish little girl with such a weakness for guys and romance? I pride myself on breaking the stereotype of a girl, yet I fit it all too well.

Right... For these stupid reasons, I can't marry anyone here, or it'll look like fucking wish fulfillment. What if someone in the other world found out? I'd never hear the end of it. I guess I'll just enjoy Frederick while I can, but if we get to an S support, I'll have to turn him down.

Gods that's depressing.

SPEAKING OF THE OTHER WORLD. I've been meaning to gather the dreamers for a little meeting, so we can agree on stuffs we ought to do. Okay. We should meet in Ninny/Shio's tent, for obvious reasons, and I need to grab my four fellow idiots.

Shio, Welsh, Ninny, and Eldrad. Five dreamers. Nice, round number. I should try and make a pairings list to make life easier. Wait, didn't I just agree that I'm not marrying anyone? Wait. I'M not marrying anyone. Everyone else is fair game. Okay. This is gonna be weird. I get to watch my best friends get hitched while I remain alone.

This is going to be depressing STOP IT SHANZIRA.

I push these thoughts out of my head, round up the idiots, and drag them all into the designated tent. Shio, Ninny, and I settle down, Eldrad and Welsh are standing around awkwardly.

The former first speaks. "So why are we in a girls' tent?"

I raise an eyebrow, having been about to lie back and I _do not appreciate it when people interfere with my time to relax._ "Because it's the sole property of the dreamers. Last I checked, the rest of us all roomed with original Shepherds."

"It's still awkward," murmurs Welsh. I'd like to think he whimpered that, but that would be an exaggeration.

Shio brings up her wonderful sense of humor, bless her soul. "Well, what, do you want me to throw all my "smallclothes" out?"

The boys both protest while I LAUGH MY ASS OFF. "GODS NO." A scot squawking is the funniest thing I've ever heard, no joke.

"WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, WOMAN?" Welsh bellows.

Oh, man, that was... That was great. I have the best BFF, hand down, Shio is just awesome. It's why we can't have nice things, but it makes her my favorite person ever. Whew.

"Can we all settle down?" Ah, right. I guess Nin is our voice of reason. The boys finally seat themselves. Okay...

I catch my breath and stretch a little. "Yeah, yeah... Got shit to discuss." I recline on Shio's bedroll.

"We already know we're all in a world depicted in a two-year old game." Way to go, Captain Eldrad the Obvious. We're so proud of you. I want to throw a pillow at you right now, that wasn't even funny.

I bring up my add-on. "Yes, but we need to decide on what to agree on. For example, backstories." We all gotta get our stories straight before someone asks about 'em.

Shio brings up a beautiful piece of nostalgia. "This sounds like one of our phone conversations." (We did a lot of roleplaying over the phone, gods it was fun.)

Welsh folds his arms and decides to burst our bubbles with a snark. "No, it _sounds_ like a bad fanfic."

I fold my arms as well, puffing up proudly. "Well, if I wrote it, it wouldn't be bad. It'd be fucking epic and it'd get on TV Tropes and Idioms' fanfic recommendations page." I know I'm good enough of a writer to get that, anyways. I just have to work at it. Two years and I still haven't managed it, though... I'm lazy.

Eldrad rolls his eyes. "Suuuure."

The other boy also takes a pin to my dream bubble. "I dunno, Shanz. Your writing is pretty cheesy. I don't think I could stand to read a self-insert."

Pointedly and indignant: "You're in it, just for that."

Welsh realizes the horror of this very quickly, good boy (I've trained him well). "Aw, come on!"

"BACK ON TOPIC, EVERYONE," Eldrad yells. He reminds me of someone I know, but who? "As you were saying, Shanzira, backstories?"

I resume my previous posture, the one I take for exposition. "Erm, yes. The one I generally use when I role-play is that I'm lesser nobility, thus my multiple talents. However, the problem with that is that someone could just do their research and point out the lie." I know how to act like nobility, anyways. I just don't do it a lot. Then again, would one expect a peasant to act so silly? Most of them would be a little too worried about survival for that, since they know it's their lot in life to get the worst deal.

... Serra, I'm looking at you.

Shio shrugs. "I'm just going to say I'm a dark mage from Valm." Yeah, better Valm than Plegia.

"I think I can pass for a guy from Ferox. Like a rogue or something." I can see Welsh doing that, yeah.

Next is Eldrad, and he says this thoughtfully: "Mercenary would work well for me." Um. Seriously?

... This all feels the same. I lie back and critique this bag of yawns: "You guys are boring, I'm bothering with the worldbuilding aspect–"

Welsh cuts across me: "It doesn't really require worldbuilding." He seems to feel that I'm going overboard.

"Jesus, woman, you write too much." Was that necessary? (Eldrad said this.)

I snort and sit up. "I'm a fanfic writer, of course I write a lot." And why should I not have fun fabricating my own bullshit backstory? Eh?

"Um..." We look over to Nin, who I just remembered hasn't shared her idea. "I can just say I'm a troubadour or something."

HER, TOO? Okay, fine, I give. "Well, you have the writing style for it. And me, uh... I have a lot of skills to justify, um... A lost line of knights? Like," I sit up, rather interested in this topic, and continue: "we used to serve some lord or another, but we became disgraced, kicked off our lands, but continued to operate as honorable knights, due to love of the country?" This is based off of actual family history, we were knights in England some centuries back, with our own family crest and everything. I need to copy it off a website sometime, it's a cool lookin' crest. Draw it, post it up on my dorm wall. That would be cool. And I could paint it on a shirt or something the next time I show up to the Twilight Knights...

Aaaaand Welsh brings me out of my fantasies of what could be. "You can just say you're an artist and you picked up weapons to defend yourself." Killjoy.

"That's boring. I want something with more imagination. I should do some research on this." I reach into my pocket for my iPhone. To Google! Holy fuck, the internet works, sweet. I have no fucking clue how– oh, it says I have a connection through its twin in the other world, sweetness. This is awesome. The iPhones are synchronized, epicsauce. So I can charge it– wait, why aren't the 3DSes synched? Hm... I shall have to experiment–

"Oh my gods, Shanzira, stop it." Damn it, Eldrad. He must've seen that I was floating off on a serious mental tangent. My eyes tend to float to weird places when that happens.

I frown and fold my arms. "Well, I have my story, and I'm sticking to it." Or rather, I have a thousand ideas for my backstory, and I should try merging them all together like a badass. Used to be a line of knights, got disgraced somehow, continued to serve for a little while before fading into obscurity, and now we just try to survive? I don't know which Gibbs rule it is, but it goes like this: "Be specific when you lie." THAT is why I love convoluted backstories. Note to self, streamline this later.

Eldrad rolls his eyes. "Anything else?"

I bring up point number two! "Um, what should we do if our tech is discovered? I know it goes without saying that we ought to hide it, but what if it's found?" This is a legitimate point; if someone went through my coat pockets, they'd find it. I need to get a little chest or something to lock it in.

The suggested solution is brought up by Shio. "We can just say we got it from an Anna. Didn't she have a megaphone in the Summer Scramble?" Well, she did, yes.

"Good thinking." Okay, Eldrad seems to like this. I don't, but I won't say anything. It feels cheap.

Sigh. Point number three. "Okay, then. What if someone asks us about our sleeping schedules? Five narcoleptics in one camp is kind of suspicious."

I see Welsh's shoulders ride and fall in a shrug. "They'll just have to learn that coincidences exist." In other words, we're fucked. Okay, fine.

Now for the most important question. "And if the Dreamer shtick is discovered?"

There's a dead silence as everyone considers this.

Eldrad responds first. "Then we tell them everything."

Welsh and Shio nod in agreement with their own versions of "okay." Ugh. I have a bad feeling about this.

Thankfully, Nin brings up the cause of my bad feeling without me having to explain it. "What if something bad happens?"

I'm totally screwing us over with this response, but it's the only solution I have. "Then something bad happens. I, for one, feel bad about lying to Chrom's face about it." In other words, we'll just have to deal with it.

Eldrad nods. "I can relate." Yeah, I remember this one time... Nah, too long of a tangent. And that's pretty personal.

Our words haven't seemed to calm Nin much, but they did SOMETHING, at least. "Okay," she heaves.

I lean back and roll my head around to relax my neck. Cra-crack. "Anyone else have anything she or he would like to add?"

"Like the fact that we're fucked up the ass?" What a delicate way to put it, Welsh. Very diplomatic.

_Sigh._ "We know, Welsh. We know. So, that's it?" I glance around, checking everyone's faces; they don't seem to have anything on their minds. "Meeting adjourned, then."

Welsh hops to his feet, almost energetically. (Energy is my thing! The little thief!) "Good, I have to go lord over Lon'qu." Oh my gods this is going to be funny. Nobody else speaks as they stand and haphazardly exit, and I'm really hoping Frederick wasn't nearby to see the five apparent narcoleptics disperse from a meeting of some sort. Anyone with a brain in their skulls could notice the link between us five if they paid attention.

Thank god nobody cares, I think as I dump myself onto my bedroll. Ouch, the ground is stiff. Judging by the position of the sun, I have a couple of hours before my next sleep comes.

So, I spend it studying thunder magic. At present, that's more important than bullshitting a backstory. I really need to improve really quickly, or I'm fucked.

Unless I pull this off well enough, in which case, I'm made of awesome. Hehe.

I close the book as my friendly tactician enters the tent. "Whew. Hey, Robin," I greet. She takes a seat on her bedroll and cracks open a volume on tactics. "When are we getting back?"

"Tomorrow," she answers, eyes on her text. She flips a few pages, trying ti find where she left off. "The Exalt is quite eager to return, something about her husband."

What.

Back up.

"... Husband?"

Robin nods and finally tears her gaze away from her precious book. "Yes, she's married. You didn't know?"

"I..." Stop stammering, Shanz, you look like an idiot. But I'm really just... stunned. "I thought she was 'married to her country'. I guess I thought wrong." I flop myself over the Arcthunder, partially for the purpose of hiding it. "Welp."

Robin shrugs, a movement I notice out of the corner of my eye. "I thought the same at first, I didn't think her the type for romance. It was a slight surprise, to say the least." She gets the luxury of being all conversational. Me, I'm... just shocked.

Also, 'slight surprise,' she said? What the hell, no! "No kidding. Whew..." I sit up, using this movement to pick up my tome and try to stuff it under my pillow.

"Also, why did you take our only Arcthunder out of the convoy?" Fuck. Caught. BULLSHIT TIME!

Smoothly: "Oh, I need it for an experiment." Whew, last time I was caught doing something I shouldn't, I froze up like a deer in the headlights. My dad was not happy. This was back in, what, junior year of high school? Man, I've been a stickler for rules up until the whole Dreamer thing, huh?

"Experiment?" Oh, right, better address that cold, skeptical tone.

I wave a hand, jedi-style. "Look, I want to try something with it, okay?" DAMN IT SHANZ STOP PREFACING THINGS WITH 'LOOK'. "You'll get it back once I'm done with it, no worries." Smile.

Robin narrows her eyes at me. "I hope so. Does this experiment involve ignoring orders?" Maybe? Let's see how well I can dodge this question.

I twist my mouth sideways and contemplate. "It involves an elaborate prank, and no, I'm not pulling it on anyone in the camp. Or Emmeryn. But you'll understand when it happens." Wide, close-eyed smile. Oh, I'm in such deep shit. Just keep grinning.

Alarmed: "What do you mean by that? What are you going to do?"

I open my mouth to show teeth in an evil joker grin (but slightly more innocent, I imagine. I don't think I can pull off the fucking Joker). "You'll see!"

Oh gods, I'm fucked. I can't keep a damn secret. She's going to wonder how I was able to prepare for these shenanigans...

* * *

**Yes, Emm is married in this. I said I was messing with headcanons. This doesn't necessarily have to perfectly imitate the original Ylisse, which I love. Oh, yeah, still taking plot idea suggestions, if you guys want some input.**

**I've put up a poll on who you guys think Shanzira is going to marry so I don't have to constantly ask you this in a review. So many options to put, oh boy. GO VOTE GUYS.**

**Again, to my readers, I love you all. Special shout-out to Hollownerox, who put this fic on the TV Tropes recommendation page. That was a serious confidence booster, thank you. Next goal: Get a TV Tropes page. Hoo boy...**

**I already have ideas for a fic after this. "OH GODS HOW CAN YOU BE THINKING ABOUT SOMETHING SO FAR AWAY?" Well, today's been a good day to daydream, and it just kind of happened. I'm going to go into deeeeep detail about the dreamer thing at some point, but for now, I'll just leave you with a warning: Shit is gonna go down.**

**Lamby out.**


	16. Id(iot)

**What a mammoth of a chapter, over 6,000 words. They'll PROBABLY be shorter than this.** **This one's gonna be good, I felt really happy with my writing style as I worked it. Brace yourselves, dear readers.**

**I wanted it to release on the same day as Asleep's Chapter 28 (which I haven't read yet, I made a point of not reading until i finish this) but noooooo G2G couldn't sit on it that long. TWO FRIGGIN' DAYS, WOULD THAT HAVE KILLED YOU? I RUSHED THIS.**

**Enjoy while I laugh evilly in the corner.**

* * *

I really, really like it here in the palace. It's nice and cool, and it's almost the end of May. Hey, Fanime's in a few days! Squee! Oh, I can't wait, it's going to be so cool.

... I get to work the dojo in full cosplay, crap. I'm gonna cooooook.

I've spent my time wandering around, bouncing happily. I've overheard some lords and servants ask each other if I really am one of the Shepherds, because I sure as hell don't act like it. When it's the servants, I pop up RIGHT behind them and ask who they were talking about, but doing so in the cheeriest possible manner. Scares the _shit_ out of them. Gods, it is so much fun. The lords, well, I can't really do that to, or I'll embarrass the boss. So I make an exit that takes more effort than it appears; I practically ballet-danced out of that while twirling my spear. (I did take ballet once, but I quit it. I was a kid.) I just wish I had a katana, show off my flow... Ah well. The grumblings of one of the Twilight Knights.

I've never had to deal with REAL nobles before, but I have role-played a bit at ren fairs and such. It's fun, but then, I'm the sort who really fucking loves to role-play. Acting, one of my many passions.

Oh! I easily decided my favorite noble out of the lot, he's Emmy's husband. Yeah, he was born the son of some earl or another, and by some bloody miracle, he and Emm legitimately fell in love. Having to dance around all these stupid, conniving nobles is depressing, it reminds me that shit's not always sweet, but this guy? He's a fucking ray of sunshine. We get along like peas in a pod. He actually told off a duke who tried to chew me out for my immaturity.

Oh, yeah, I should mention his name and title, I made a point of remembering it. He was the Earl of Eastgale before he married Emm, and his name's Hubert. Now he's _technically_ a prince, and it's still Emmy's rule, not his. Oh, and since he wasn't born into the royal family, everyone still refers to Chrom as being "the" prince of Ylisse. Heh. He told me that he used to get a lot of flak from the other nobles until Emmeryn put her foot down. Pretty face, pacifist, with fucking iron politics.

Emmeryn is far more metal than she looks. And it's a good thing she is, some of the looks I've gotten from a few of the lords were, um, less than comforting. Some of them, when they spoke of how childish I act, they mentioned how they'd like to "put me in my place"... And there were never ladies around when this was brought up.

Yeah, I never go anywhere without my spear and Arcthunder now. The spear ought to put them off, at least. This is just what I was told to worry about as a kid, and because of my fucking anxiety, I actually took it seriously, unlike so many others. I've been stuffing my queue into my coat more often since then.

Thankfully, one place the nobles rarely go would be the gardens. It's hot out, or at least it is to them. It feels like a regular California summer to me, so I'm remotely comfortable. And it's pretty as all hell. I've been climbing up trees and playing tag with Lissa and a few others. It's all good as long as we don't piss off the gardeners, but even then, we're remotely safe: We've got the fucking princess on our side.

This whole palace is like a rosebush: Beautiful, but if you're not careful in it, you're gonna get stuck like a pig. And I can only imagine Plegia must be worse. Shudder.

I think the safest place is the stables. The stable hands are actually friendly, unlike the gardeners. Well, they'd have to have a good temperament to work with these animals. Horses are awesome, I've always had an affinity for them. Oh, unicorns especially. Love the unicorns. Shame none of the pegasi have horns... Well, except for Phila's, the lucky bitch.

Ninny's been letting me ride her pegasus every now and then, so I can get more accustomed to riding one. Robin keeps pairing me up with Sumia, so the height is something I had better familiarize myself with. According to Robin, the advantages are that I get a safe place to sling spells from, while Sumia gets a wonderful boost in confidence. Win-win.

So, the second afternoon since we got here, Shio sees me skipping about happily and decides to chat with me. Always glad to entertain my best friend. "You really like it here, don't you?"

She said almost accusingly. I laugh it off a little, flat-out too cheerful to give a fig. "It's almost like candyland. More gardens to hide and explore in than I ever dreamed of. I'm never bored, there's always something fun to do." Oh, man, I oughta round up a few people for a game of hide-and-seek in there. Lissa, Shio, Ninny, Eldrad, Chrom, Frederick (if I can manage it!), who else? Sumia might be fun... Oh, I could invite–

"Sheesh, if you like it so much, why don't you just marry Chrom?" WHY ARE YOU SMILING LIKE THAT?!

I let out a bitter sigh at this. Way to fuck my mood over, Shio. "Three good reasons. Want me to list 'em?"

My sudden aggression causes her to take a step back in alarm. "Wow, you have three? Sure, go ahead. You won't be satisfied until you say them anyways." My best friend, ladies and gentlemen. We know each other really well.

The first one– which is the one which weighs on me most heavily– is the hardest to explain. Here's my attempt: "One, if I married ANYONE here in Ylisse, I'd never feel I deserved it or anything, I'd feel like a wish-fulfillment mary-sue out of some shitty fanfic. And yes, that's a legit worry for me, since I think like my life's a story." It's... It's so meta, that's the hard thing. And I know, it makes NO SENSE, but that's just the fucking way I think. I'm bloody perfect! I look pretty and I'm good at most things I attempt! ... And I hate it because I'm the sort of person that crops up every now and then in reality, but never in writing because people like me are just impossible to write without the phrase "mary–sue" getting flung around.

This would make the _weirdest_ fanfic.

Shio accepts this bit of Dinrel logic and moves on. "Okay. Next?"

This one is actually straightforward, but a continuation, I suppose, of number one. "Number two: He's the fucking prince of Ylisse. Kinda strikes me as being off-limits."

The response I get is a slow head-shaking. "Not necessarily." She's probably thinking of Olivia or Sumia. But they had justified... You know what, that has nothing to do with my last reason.

"Number three: Would screw with my one-time OTP, Chrom and Robin."

She raises her eyebrows and nods her head. "Okay, that's a good reason. But you're not really much of a shipper, why does it matter to you so much?" I don't care if people say being a Fire Emblem geek makes me a shipper. I literally have three things on my list of pairings. That. Is. It.

I sigh. "There's a reason that was my OTP. It's just a _really good pairing._ At least, in my opinion." I know, a lot of people complain about the Chrom/Robin shippers. I've met a few of them, however, who are really thoughtful about it– there are fanfics I've banned myself from reading during class hours because they are so fucking fluffy. It is a pairing I will cry over.

"But remember, you used to–"

Immediate interrupt: "PLEASE don't remind me." Gods, that piece of nostalgia is more than a little embarrassing in this setting. "Or if you do, remind me in the other world, so nobody can overhear. Funny questions, you know?"

Shio puts her hands up in a gesture of surrender. "Okay, okay."

I sigh, partly in relief, partly because that even happened in the first place. The conversation lapses into awkward silence, until a thought wanders across my mind: Frederick. "... Wonder what my boyfriend's doing?"

Shio stares at me as though I regained my sanity or something. "You have a _boyfriend?"_

Big, slow nods are my response. "Yeeeaaaahhh, Frederick." How did she not know?

"WHAT?!" She takes a step back, completely surprised. Let's face it, I've shown interest in him before, but he's so radically different that I normally put him in spades rather than hearts. "Why didn't you add that with your reasons not to marry Chrom?"

I shrug, tilting my head. "Well, I don't know if it'll work out. You never know with these things. He might die or something." Please tell me I didn't just jinx it. He's quite sweet when he wants to be. Can he please live? Please?

Shio turns around to face forward again. "Okay, then." She's still in shock, obviously.

An evil grin splits my face from ear to ear. "'Scuse me, then, I'm gonna go find him." I slink away from Shio, through the corridor, past a pair of servants scrubbing the floors, ignoring a nobleman throwing me a weird look, and find my knight in shining armor standing guard outside Emmeryn's council room.

I glue myself to his arm at once. The different reds on his face are delights to my eyes. He doesn't try to shake me off, but he grumbles at me, trying to persuade me to adopt decorum for a change (his words). In return, I nuzzle his shoulder and snuggle up to his side. His face goes even redder, and I swear the way his eyebrows are screwed up in such consternation is the funniest and cutest thing.

He probably finds my giggles more mortifying than my clinginess. Mission. Fucking. Success. Every girlfriend should playfully embarrass her boyfriend at some point. At least, girls capable of cuteness should try it. Me, I apparently have adorability in abundance.

This is probably what's humiliating Frederick so much; this really cute, hardly-threatening girl is sticking to him like glue and doting on him while he's trying to look intimidating and professional. ... And then my next thought formed as, "if he wants to look professional, he should shed the armor and just wear his bloody suit." Gods, why must Lust be my sin? I suppose SOMETHING needed to replace Sloth...

Mm, Sloth... Sleep... Oh, shit, I'm dozing off aga–

* * *

"What the hell? It was like, noon, and I fell asleep?"

That was me, whispering to myself in the quiet darkness of my dorm. I just pulled out my phone and checked the time; it's just a little past midnight. The only reason I can think of for having fallen asleep was to catch up so I could wake again at a later time.

Which means, since my schedule is fucking psychic or some bullshit, Emm's assassination is tonight. Well, fuck. At least I'll be awake for it!

"You, too?" Ah, that was Nin. Looks like she's awake as well.

"Hm," I briefly run over my thoughts again as though proofreading them. "I think Emm's assassination is tonight."

Nin yawns. "You think?" ... Normally, she doesn't sass. She must really dislike being awoken like this.

"Aw, shush. Just grab your damn DS and play." I reach for my 3DS, trying to silence the jingles of the charms on it (one a laminated print of Ike, the other a metal thingy of Pokemon's fifth generation starters). I fire it up and hastily move the volume bar down.

I hear Nin shuffle for hers with another yawn. "Fine."

I never did beat Apotheosis... It's a fucking pain, I can't get past that third fight. I suppose it'd be beatable if I just started a new playthrough, married everyone off for more power to the kids, and then used the kids for it, but that would be too much work. Just grinding this file's kids is enough of a pain.

I die at the third bout several times (FUCKING MARIBELLE!) before I switch it off. I'm starting to get drowsy... I suppose it's showtime. I check the time... Almost morning. It does seem to be getting lighter out...

"Nin?"

"Yes, I know." She closes her 3DS.

I try not to yawn, but my attempt to stifle it fails. "Ngh. Showtime."

* * *

I awake to Robin shuffling through her things. I streeeeetch... and sit at the edge of my bed. She hears me moving and looks over to confirm her ears' report, and her surprise is palpable when she finds they were right. It doesn't take her long to recover, though. She resumes digging through her things.

"You fall asleep at the strangest times, Shanzira." I believe that's a steel sword she's stuffing into a sheath at her belt. I could be wrong, though.

This is literally the first thing I thought after she spoke: "Yeah, I know."

"Actually," she lifts an Elfire out of her things and examines it as she speaks. When did she get that? Hm. "At the very same time you collapsed, Shio, Welsh, Nineeyena, and Eldrad all did as well."

Oh shit. "Mm." We need to think of an excuse for this, pronto. Ah, if only I had the internet to outsource from...

Robin looks over at me with a flat stare, that's disbelief on it. "That's your response? A hum?"

I busy myself with a stretch. "Mmhmm." Ooohhh, that stretch feels gooooooood. I did just wake up, after all.

I hear Robin sigh disappointedly. "You're good at clamming up what you want to." ... Clamming. Fish puns. DAMN IT I AM NOT MEENAH. "Besides, I've been meaning to talk to Chrom, despite your... Prank."

Talk to Chrom? Yep, sound about right. And good to see I didn't get in the way of my one-time OTP, heh. But I hope she bears that in mind. Oh, yeah! I need to do the coatswap so my trick works! "That reminds me."

She pauses and gives me her full attention. "Yes?"

Oh, wait, I need to make sure she doesn't discover my tech. "Give me a second." I hastily and carefully– I know that seems like an oxymoron, but haste and I are old friends– stuff the contents of my pockets under my bed, then turn to my friendly tactician. "I need to swap coats with you, just for tonight."

She looks at me like I'm crazy. After all, don't our coats look alike enough? ... Not for this purpose, no. Why settle for my imitation when I can have the real thing? "Why?"

And now to bullshit her. I give her an infuriatingly vague answer: "You'll see! And you'll be grateful you did." If I can pull this off, I shall forever be a badass.

Robin considers it for a moment, then nods her head. "Very well." She must figure it doesn't hurt to try the swap, and it's such a tiny detail anyways. It matters to me, love, but I shan't say why. She sheds her cloak and hands it to me while I'm fumbling around with the rope and the ribbon and the crap that keeps it on me. When I finish with that, we try on the other's cloaks. "It's small," she complains. Well, it was made specifically for me, but she's not that much bigger than I am. At least she's not a big buff guy.

"But you have a small frame like I do." I'm a bloody shrimp, I swear.

She adjusts the cuffs a little and looks over it. "Yes, but..." She lowers her arms. "I suppose I'm just accustomed to–"

"Swimming in _this_ bloody thing." I'm not kidding, this fucking cloak is HUGE. Didn't I just say that Robin's not much bigger than me? How does she _wear_ this thing?! ... Well, on the other hand... it's the actual Robin's Hood.

Robin dusts a few curly red hairs off the coat. "Yes. I expect a full explanation about this in the morning." Cool, I have a little while to think of some bullshit. Or I could tell the truth... If my prank works. Ahh, this is gonna be so much fun...

I make a promise I hope I'll be able to keep. "You'll get one! Don't worry." Robin nods at me, then steps outside, rolling her shoulders. I grab some paints really quickly and put the mark of Grima on the back of my right hand (It turns out I can only use my left hand to draw if I'm using my right hand as a canvas). After that, I stuff a few vials of holy water into my– er, Robin's– pockets, then I dash out to follow my duplicate.

Thankfully, she didn't get too far ahead of me. "Why are you following me?"

I give her a shrug. Wow, I've gotten a lot of practice with infuriating vagueness. "One, I hardly know my way around here. Two, I have a good feeling about following you." Some way to say 'I know what's going to happen and I want to witness it.' Heh. We exit into the gardens.

That's a nicely confounded sigh. "Well, your luck is... Unbelievable, to say the least." Not the only part of me which is unbelievable, I imagine. "You're a mysterious person, Shanzira."

I give her this really affronted look. "And you're not?"

Her eyebrows go up. "Point taken. Ah, there's Chrom." Yup, the blob of white-and-blue up ahead is him. He sure stands out against the crap-ton of green. "He's been avoiding me for a while, and I don't think it has to do with your prank."

Yeah, those posters feel like ancient history by now. "Talk it over with him, then. I'll just stand and watch."

I love that puzzled look of hers. "You won't jump in?" 'Jump in' she says, how appropriate. I do tend to abide by Issun's motto of 'leap before you think', don't I? Heh. (Okami was a great game, everyone with a Wii, WiiU, or a PS2 ought to grab themselves a copy if they can.)

I shake my head. "Unless something happens, no. I'll just watch and wave." Yeaahh, _right._ I know what I'm going to do.

Robin looks quite grateful that I've promised not to fuck things up for once. "Very well." She turns round, takes a deep breath to steel herself, and approaches the boss. "Chrom?"

Chrom turns to regard her. "Robin." Hesitation's written all over his face and it's really audible in his voice. He plainly doesn't want to talk to her... Why am I still paying attention to this conversation? I know how it goes. I fucking studied it because it was good character development.

I tiptoe around the scene to find the bushes which look the best to hide in. Ah, there we are, there's Marth, just sitting there, watching... and I don't think he's noticed me. "Evening!" Now THAT'S a stage-whisper.

He jumps. "Huh?" Looks at me. "You! Why... How did..." And then it sinks in. Yep, from what he said in Ferox, it seems he knows that I have a knowledge of the future as useful as his. "Of course..."

I shrug and tilt my head, to tell him not to sweat it. "So I guess I fuck up somehow and everyone finds out I know stuff?"

Marth knows he's on thin ice, so he's got a job trying to figure out what to say. He inhales air after a minute, then...

"I wouldn't say you fucked up."

"WHUH!" Okay, please tell me no one heard that! I did NOT expect to hear that voice here, that high, honest-to-god first soprano. "Holy– You're here, too?"

My "guardian" takes a seat by Marth. "Good evening. This is a crowded garden, is it not?" ... Her laugh sounds nervous. Poor dear... Methinks she could use some levity.

I give her a shrug and a smile. "I bet it wasn't crowded in the original timeline..." Wait, what the fuck am I saying? "Ah, no, that's a tangent. May I AT LEAST know your name?"

Her voice goes back to stoicism, and again I hate that damn mask-hood combo of hers for hiding her expression so well. "I told you. I am a guardian."

Fold arms. "I'm a good sight sharper than that, love." I see Marth stiffen at this for some reason. "You're from the same place as Marth, yes? Who's your mother?"

"Don't–" Marth begins warningly.

'Guardian' lets out a pained sigh. "Damn it, I can't hide anything from you. You are."

Wait, _what?_

"Whoa. I... I have a kid?" More shockingly, I get MARRIED?! And... This is that kid? She... If only I could see her face. I just want to hug her tight like my favorite unicorn...

She nods. "Yes... You do. My name is–"

Marth interrupts, apparently really worried that this'll screw things up. "Ahem!"

Hastily, she finishes: "It's Noel!"

Noel... Like the Blazblue character. Remember that, Shanz, Noel. I say it to myself to get it down. "Noel... Well met!"

Marth groans, having failed his mission to keep that from me. "Of course... Come," he tilts his head towards the scene, "we have business."

"'Course," I whisper, and I slink off to watch from another angle. I do a full one-eighty around them so I have a good place to jump out from.

What? I want to interfere. Who wouldn't?

"Good evening to you." Well, kudos for being able to stabilize your voice so quickly, Marth. Chrom and Robin both look surprised as hell to see him, then Noel comes and joins them.

"You've kept well, I see." From her voice, I can tell she's smiling.

... My daughter, Noel... She... Oh, she's so... She's the cutest. I only have her voice to go by, but I can already tell she takes after me. She's got a strain of levity in her, and I'd like to stoke it. She seems to know Lucina well... I can only imagine they're good friends. Then again, Lucina's really friendly with all the kids in general...

... She's such a sweetling. Noel, I mean. From here, I can tell, she's just below my height, and I can't see her hair (it's really well hidden, she's seen to that), but I bet it's just as curly and shiny as mine... And hopefully red. Red's the best hair color.

This is the best reason I've ever had to cry in my life. Unbridled joy and pride... she's just a badass on the battlefield, with that Arcwind and Blizzard! ... And look, my tears are on the ground now. She actually saved my life with her Rescue staff... She... Oh, I just...

I don't really care who her father is right now, I don't think I will care for a while. I'm just so ridiculously happy, she's the cutest kid. Probably cuter than I was... And I missed getting to see her grow up, damn. Well, I guess I'll see it in a few years? I don't know... I just... I want my daughter in my arms, just so I can hug her and tell her how much of a sweetling she is...

Oh, wait, there's a glint of gold and silver in the air, oh my crap, that's Marth, jumping up to kill the first assassin, shit, I need to move! Okay, he's down, and Marth's being all badass, swiping the blood off the sword. Now, I need to get the fuck UP, and get the second guy before–

Before he jumps out and perfectly bifurcates her mask. Gods damn it, he already did. Chrom runs forward while I see Noel work some quick handiwork, and it looks like a well-focused breeze pushed the second assassin right into the Falchion when Chrom swung it.

My daughter is a fucking badass. Dry your damn tears, Shanz, an assassination is now time to be crying. I stop myself; I notice my feet seem to have moved of their own accord.

"So much for that image, huh," Noel says to Marth. Oh, sweet, I can use female pronouns again.

There's an awkward silence; Marth seems to be quite embarrassed for this.

"You're a woman?" Oh, Chrom, you clueless idiot. I shouldn't be grinning right now, but I am. This is one of those times a Gibbs slap would do you some good.

Marth turns around coolly. "And quite an actress, too. Honestly, I'm surprised you didn't figure it out until just now." Nice one, Mar-mar. Niiiice.

Noel and I are both snickering at this. Like mother, like daughter. Best kid ever.

I clear my throat. "Ahum, we have things to worry about," right here is when my grin FINALLY slides off my face, "like AN ASSASSINATION TO PREVENT?!"

And the other four just nod, like "oh shit right I forgot" and we run inside the palace, leaving the corpses in the gardens. Sure enough, there are shadowy figures (so cliche! Ugh) in the hallways. I fling a bolt of Arcthunder at one and watch him collapse, quite satisfied. Several of the Shepherds run in, some of them with mounts (The fuck? How did they get them so quickly?).

Robin scoffs, hating to break her word. "Very well, Shanzira, you get to join in this one. Don't you dare disobey orders, you hear me?"

I give her a silly salute, my effective 'yes, ma'am!' "Just a request, may I fight with Sumia sometime during this battle? She needs someone to look out for her." Or rather, I could use someone around to calm my shit. I mean, hell. This is an assassination.

Robin nods at me and calls down the hall, "SUMIA!" My partner for the battle elegantly floats over on her pegasus. Fuck, she's good at this.

"AND EVERYONE," I shout for the purpose of raising morale, "DON'T FORGET: RULE NUMBER ONE!"

_Fwump._ Caeda and Sumia land by me, the latter giggling. "The most important rule!" Ah, good, she's not nervous. Excellent.

"HOW CAN WE FORGET THAT RULE," oh, hey, Welsh is in here, "YOU'VE BEEN SHOUTING IT FOR YEARS!" Heh heh! Sorry, but you'll never get a break from my insanity, old buddy!

Marth salutes at me from her makeshift post at Emmeryn's door. "Of course, madam!"

Next to her, Noel giggles happily. "Oh, rule number one... I can't believe I missed her so much. A ray of sunshine amidst the dreary future of this world..." She puffs up, and I think, from the sound of her voice, she's weeping happily.

"Noel." Marth elbows her. "Focus."

She sniffs and snaps to attention. "Yes, ma'am!"

Well, that was odd. Okay. Um. Sumia's right next to me, I should mount her pegasus. "All right, let's do this." Wow, really grateful for my leg flexibility, riding a pegasus would otherwise hurt. I wonder how men ride horses without suffering the whole time, heh. "Fun time."

Sumia readies her lance while I stow my spear. "I wouldn't call it fun, Shanzira." Yeah, she's probably right to worry for my mental health there. I did sound a bit like a psychopath for a moment.

"Gotta keep morale up somehow." Yoink, now I can use this baby properly. Arcthunder, you sexy bitch. "Whoo..."

I see Sumia's shoulders rise up and sink down in a shrug. "Well, you have a point there, but..." She turns to look at my face, but gets distracted by the epicsauce weaponry I'm sporting. "Oh, is that an Arcthunder?"

I puff up proudly. "Persuaded Robin to let me borrow it." Gesture to dark hallways. "Good thing, eh?" ... Holy shit, I just realized– The lights have been doused, this really rings a bell of Zephiel's assassination back in Blazing Sword. I suppose Validar serves as the combination Jaffar/Ursula for this, but mostly Ursula. Ugh.

"You're always prepared for this sort of thing." Tone of admiration. Yeah, well, here's my response to that.

"Always be prepared! Rule number thirty-nine." There are two sub-rules for it; never leave home without keys, and never go anywhere without art materials. I never break that rule of my own will.

Astounded: "How many rules are there?"

How many did I have on my list? Umm. "Forty-five, at last count." They're like Gibbs rules, I swear, except mostly different. My second favorite is rule four: Never read fanfiction in class.

Sumia shifts her lance to her other hand. "How do you remember them all?"

I shrug in response. "I only remember the important ones." Hello, what's that? "HEY LOOK A MAGE!" I point. "GO KILL IT!" At least, I'm pretty sure that's a mage... Yep, mage.

She jumps and digs her heels into Caeda's sides. "O–of course!" FWOOM. What a burst of speed. WHEEEEEEE! And BAM! We stop suddenly as lance meets flesh, and the poor mage has been impaled all the way through. Nice shot! The corpse slides off the lance, and the pegasus takes a few flaps back. I glance around.

"Might wanna return back to close by Emm's room. I know that Marth and the Guardian have it under tight watch, but I'd go for a defensive tactic in this fight." That, and I want to confirm orders from Robin. Surely she's got a plan for this.

"It's rather straightforward," she answers when I ask. "Frederick watches this hallway, while the rest of the Shepherds take the two corridors on either side, rush down them, and flank the assassins in the middle, since they meet in that courtyard there. You're on the west flank."

Isn't Gaius on that side? Welp, never mind. Just get to it. FWOOM. "Heya, boss!" Hooves clatter against stone as Sumia pulls Caeda to a quick stop beside him. "Good luck and don't do anything stupid!" And Caeda lifts herself off the ground again. I figured Chrom needed a morale boost. I figure we ALL could use a morale boost... Eh, well. Knife-work to do. I zap a few guys, Sumia chucks a few javelins, and I have to stop her from flinging one at Gaius. "Chrom, talk to that guy!" I kind of want the candy thief to be recruited, not killed.

Chrom gives me a funny look and then proceeds to threaten poor Gaius. Sumia and I push the line forward juuuust a bit, and we keep flinging projectiles. We're pretty fuckin' OP at this point. Whooohooo!

Fling a thunder there, bolt that guy here, and as long as we keep doing our work, the battle goes fine. What is this, normal mode? Yawn! I'm fucking bored! I suppose this is what happens when Paragon is your skill, huh? We've mostly cleaned out these guys.

"Shanzira, Sumia!" I twist around, cracking my back a little, hearing Robin's voice. "Go ahead and clear out the west side! Chrom and I will join you in a few minutes!"

Aw, hell yes. We're so ridiculously awesome, Robin's deemed us a match for any of the poor saps who might be over here. Suckers. I quickly pull my hood up, prank in mind, and we rush the corridor, lance flashing and tome sparking, and three different assassins drop dead. We. Are. On. A. Roll.

"Whoops!" Caeda seems to stumble over something, fucking up all balance in the world. Sumia, since she's fucking strapped to the saddle, is fine; I fall off and land on my ass. Hood's still on my face, good.

Then everything goes yellow for a split second.

Blood flecks land everywhere, some even on my face.

What the fuck just happened?

I stand up. Caeda is on the floor, Sumia is half underneath her, thanks to her saddle strap, and... Oh, oh gods, I... My stomach nearly knotted just there. There's a pool of blood spreading on the floor, staining Caeda's white fur, and it's all over Sumia's breastplate. It's pouring out of it, actually. I can see a bit of white and a whole lot of red. I shut my eyes, this is too gruesome for me.

I can hear her speak, just barely choking out words. "No... I just... wanted..."

Don't vomit, don't cry. Just hold it all in. You can do this, it's been three years since someone dear to you last died, surely you're better at this now. I take a few deep breaths to steady myself, and with every exhalation comes a word. "No... No... Shit..." Okay, stand. Don't just lie on the ground like a dumbass, you'll get killed.

All the world has been inverted in just that time. All that was good has gone bad. My cheerful disposition? It's disappeared. I'm raging angry and hurt at the same time, but for the love of all that might be good, I stuff it into the back of my head and focus.

I can't be bothered with this stupid fucking prank. All I can do is focus on the other trick I have up my sleeve, a reward from studying thunder so much. I step forward, approaching Validar.

His face lights up. The guy has paler skin than his artwork hinted; he actually somewhat resembles Robin, but he's still ridiculously tall and has dark hair. "Oho... Could you be...?" Then a sinister grin splits it. "Come with me, my dear..." Well. I did trick him into thinking I was Robin, at least, but I can't be bothered for step two (letting him think I was Grima). Fuck step two, it probably wouldn't have worked anyways.

I whisper the chants for Arcthunder underneath my breath. Sparks begin to flare up and fly everywhere, dancing off my coat and twitching in the air. I'll make this bastard regret ever being born.

He snorts at me. "Hmph. Very well, then." Yes, that's right, Validar. I've decided to fight you. What now, huh?

There are three things that make a Twilight Knight win: basics, movement, and the first strike.

The last is the one I employ first. All the sparks floating about condense around the region of my hand and shoot out– think ballista shooting a bolt– at Validar. It misses– naturally– and downs a wall. Dust scatters everywhere as stone bricks settle.

Validar glances back at this with a smile. "Impressive, but no match for me." He raises a hand, gathers energy, and shoots a Thoron at me. I duck beneath it easily; he misshot and it caves in part of the ceiling. Dumbass.

"I'll kill you." I fling a few sparks into the air to regather later. "I swear I'll kill you." Don't think about Sumia. Just scatter energy for you to use.

He snorts, and I can practically smell his derision mixed with the salty stench of blood. "You cannot kill me." Oh yeah? Well, time to put those sparks to use. "I am–" And my Arcthunder cuts him off. He might have a Thoron, but I'm far fucking smarter than this dumbass. "Fine. If that is how you wish to play..." He charges Thoron again at me. I dodge the first two blasts; I've learned how to fucking duck. The third one looks like it'll hit me no matter what, so I put my trick to use: I point one finger straight at it and channel it through my arm, between my shoulders, and out the other hand– right back at him.

That's right, I can redirect lightning.

The strike doesn't impale him; his resistance is enough to spread the force of it over an area of several feet. However, it does send him crashing against a stone wall, which I imagine left a pretty nasty bruise. He looks up at me, shocked. "What?!"

I allow myself a toothy smirk, I don't care how fucking creepy it looks. "I know thunder inside and out. That tome is useless."

And then he switches tomes to something darker. My eyes widen; he casts it quicker than I can follow and hits me with it in a split second. "Thunder is no match for darkness. Silly girl..."

I didn't realize... Dark tomes could be so fast... Shit... I'm on the ground. I'm bleeding. I'm in a lot of pain. I'm about to die. I close my eyes.

... Footsteps. Please, please, whoever you are, save me...

I hear them skid to a stop. "Wha..." That's Chrom's voice. He'll do it. He can kill Validar. "SUMIA! SHANZIRA! Robin, see to them, I'll fight him!" Yeah, he... He probably didn't expect this to happen to two of his best.

I hear another snort from Validar. "You think yourself strong enough to overcome–" and then a groan of pain interrupts him. Looks like... looks like I did enough damage to slow him down. Good.

"You attacked my friends," Chrom yells. "You're not leaving this place alive!" Good. Kill the bastard. Make him suffer.

I hear a whisper from Robin a few yards away. "Dead..." She was probably examining Sumia. I know I saw it happen, but it strikes me as a blow nonetheless; I groan in agony. After that, there's hurried shuffling towards me, and I feel a hand push me over onto my back. "You're alive!" Yup... That's Robin... I open my eyes. She's covered in blood...

"M'pologies," I mumble. "I fucked up..." Sob. "I fucked up. Shit." I wail at this, my composure having finally crumbled.

"Hang on, I can save you! Here!" She pulls out a vial and uncorks it, then hastily pours its contents into my mouth. Ew... But I think it's a concoction... Ngh. I swallow it gratefully, then lift a hand towards the clash.

"Kill him... Finish what I started..." I push Robin away, weakly. "Go! Go..."

She nods with a teary gasp, then stands and runs to follow my damn orders. I close my eyes and listen to the sounds of magic and metal for a few minutes while I languish. That concoction isn't fully healing me...

I'm not going to die, I swear. I will not fucking die this time. I might have a backup life, but I will NOT waste this one! .. I will not... I... Damn it, stop crying... Noel, where are you? My little sweetling... I just wanted to hold you...

Get me out of this pain, please... "Why... am I not... Awake yet... Shit... I..." I hear footsteps approaching me. Looks like they did it. "I'm so sorry..."

"Shanz, can you move?" Chrom's squatting right by me, from how close his voice is.

"I... I have to... Crap. Okay, just... Just help me up." I open my eyes again, damn, there's a lot of blood everywhere... So much red...

I see a bit of gray and blue. "Can you give me your hand?" Must be the boss's hand. I take it with my left, remembering that my right is painted right now. He yoinks me to my feet, and I stumble briefly, then start limping away, hoping to find my room. The other end of the corridor is literally a bloody, dusty mess.

I hear a slight gasp. "You're badly wounded, you shouldn't be moving!" I think that was Chrom's voice. My hearing's starting to go from all the noise...

"Worrywart," I snort. "I'm almost as hard to kill... As she is..." I mean Robin by this. "And... I'm so sorry..." Sumia...

I hear him turn briefly. "Robin, what about Sumia?"

Robin's obvious grieved to tell him this. "She's dead..."

Chrom lets out a grunt as though he took a blow to the stomach. "No... We saved my sister, but..." I hear a staggered breath from him. "I won't lose another Shepherd!" And less than a second later, I feel him holding me up on my left side, bracing me as I walk. It's so much easier now...

I let out a chuckling sigh. "Thanks, boss. Now you're... A leader I'd follow..." I can't say my employment history is too extensive, but he's the best boss I've ever had. I'm reminded of something I once had to sing back in choir. "How did that song go again...?"

_"I vow to thee, my country, all earthly thing above,_

_Entire and whole and perfect, the service of my love..."_

I sing the next few part on "na" because I don't remember the words, but it finishes like this:

_"The love that pays the price,_

_The love that makes undaunted the final sacrifice..."_

I couldn't stop thinking about Ylisse when I first read that song... It was so... rousing... it was a true delight to sing, shame we only... performed it once... Things are getting hazy.

Chrom's voice fights its way to my eardrums. "Don't go talking like that... We need you, remember? Shanz?" He shakes me as I don't respond to him. "Shanz!"

I eke out one final thing. "Tell Frederick I'm sorry..." And the few remaining lights flicker out.

Tell me I didn't just die...

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**To everyone who G2G recommended to go and come read this because it's lighter: HAHAHAHAHAHA. yesheknewsomeonewasgoingtodie. Now I get to go read his chapter, after I finish dishes. Ahaha... We writers are sadistic creatures; we feed off the pain of our readers.**

**Still asking people to GO AND VOTE IN THAT POLL ON MY PROFILE, IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY. Seriously, only ten votes? Do I have to threaten to postpone the next chapter to motivate you guys? It certainly worked well when I wanted volunteers.**

**Thanks for reading, next chapter when I finally stop laughing sadistically. Leave a review so I know how how you guys react.**

**EDIT: So I screwed up and cut my left hand; I have two stitches on it. I can still type, but not as fast. Be a while before the next chapter. Sorry, guys!**


	17. Storms in the Chest

**Sorry for the week-long delay, I procrastinated a lot. My fourth of July wasn't as fun as it normally is; not a lot of opportunity to watch fireworks.**

**I HAVE OVER 60 READERS I'M REALLY HAPPY THANK YOU GUYS 333**

**But anyways yeah I'm not going to kill Shanz off. Unfortunately, she's going to assume she died every time she gets knocked out. She tends to catastrophize everything.**

**Two support conversations here, ooh, fun. And I'm tired. Yawwwn. Oh, yeah, I didn't really proofread this chapter... I'll do it later...**

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Okay, I'm in my dorm now. I just got knocked out, and I'm either dead or just unconscious. Please tell me I'm just unconscious. Ugghhhh.

There's that soreness. Okay, I'm proooobably just knocked out, but I need Nin to wake so I can confirm it.

I spend half an hour in silent dark solitude, and then she finally stirs.

An impatient whimper: "Am I dead?"

Nin yawns and groans for a solid minute before responding. She gets up, combs her hair, dons her fluffy green pants– by the way, the little white dots are doggies– before she answers me. "No," I let out a sigh of relief at this, "but you're hurt badly. I saw Robin and Chrom carrying you to the palace's hospital wing, and they were definitely panicked." She pauses, switching her nightshirt for something slightly more acceptable. I notice a slight hesitation in her movements, like she's skittish about this next bit. "I heard Chrom say something like "not two in one night". Do you know what he meant?"

Oh.

Yeah.

That.

My breathing immediately shakes up when I bring the image to mind, and I try to collect it, a vain attempt. "Sumia's dead." I sniff at this. I'd normally follow it up with a reiteration for dramatic purposes, but fuck drama right now, even if... I'm always... naturally inclined toward it... Shit. And there I go. There I fucking go.

"What?" Although Nin pauses, it seems she's not entirely surprised. Well, then. "No..."

She must have figured that someone had died, but not known who.

"She's dead," I sob. "Dead." I was starting to train her in the ways of self-improvement, too. She had a lot of promise. She was a really good unit, and a damn good friend! And... she's gone. She didn't deserve that... She didn't deserve a Thoron through the chest. Gods damn it, why?! Why... "WHY?!" I finally wail.

Ninny wraps one arm around me. "It'll be okay."

... Please let her be right.

"And Fanime starts today, doesn't it?" I hiccup. "Shit. I... I have shit to do... I'm really late... the Twilight Knights are gonna kill me... I gotta get my cosplay on... and... soldier on..." I take a step forward to get Nin off me. She's now behind me.

"I can help you with your wig, if you need it." Thanks, Nin. I'll... I'll need that. I pick up the pieces of my cosplay and don them. Shirt... Tunic... Pants... Socks... Boots... Those boots took a lot of work to make. Gloves... Armor... Cape... I stop only when I reach the wig. I hesitate.

Nin helps me put my hair into a bun, then tightly puts the net over it. Okay. That should work. I add the tiara to it.

"You look just like her. Er... You got to see her, right?"

I examine my reflection in a small mirror. Yeah, she's right. But then, that particular nose shape... the mouth... The shape of my chin... That's just... just lucky, I guess. I just need to dye my eyebrows somehow. No doing that, I suppose... Unless I get colored hair spray and some stencils. Nah. Maybe tomorrow... After I deal with everyone... Everyone who Sumia was close to... Chrom, Robin, Sully... And when we recruit Cordelia, how do I explain that her best friend's dead? Damn it, Sumia, you could've outlived the damn war...

I bet Eldrad and Welsh hardly give a damn...

Shio. She's going to be the only one to sympathize with me. But I don't think she'll be at any of the Twilight Knights' weapons workshops... And her phone's always off, or she won't hear it go off. Fanime's loud.

And I can't tell anyone else here.

Fuck.

I sit on my bed and weep. Nineeyena takes a seat next to me and holds me as I wail. Every now and then, I hear the door creak open as someone else in the dorm peeks open to see if this room's resident is all right, and Nin shoos them away with one hand.

And every time that happens, I think: _I dare you to make fun of me. Go on. Try. See what I'll do to you._

... I'm still hung up about middle school, I guess. Those days were hell... Back when I was right to worry about the worst happening... Would that I had never suffered them. Then these lingering fears would not still rankle me...

When in darkness and doubt, make good art.

But... How do I make art of losing my friend? How do I make beauty from so grievous a wound as grief? How can I translate tears into fairness?

_"... such beauty marred by tears..."_ Where was that line from? I can't remember. I don't want to think... It's a fragment of a line, from... The seventh Fire Emblem. Louise says it. Says it to the queen of Bern. My wails decrease into sniffles and sobs.

Family struggles are nothing next to this... Though they wound children, which is a heinous crime in its own right, it's still nothing... _nothing_ next to this kind of grief.

I stand up.

I have work to do.

Like a few workshops to help with.

Weapons to swing around.

Noobs to educate.

With these thoughts held close to my chest, as though I'm clinging to my few fragments of sanity, I stride out the door. My appearance and tears draw attention, exactly the opposite of what I wish would happen.

I just wish they'd ignore me. I don't want to make a damn scene. I don't want to draw attention like this.

I open my car and sit in the driver's seat, carefully wiping my face and eyes. Okay. Let's go. Find your parking spot near the hotel Shio picked out. We'll all be staying in it... And Shio should have gotten our badges yesterday, Thursday...

Traffic's horrible. It always is this time of year.

The room smells good though. Sweet. Freshly perfumed. Good. A good use of our money. I unload a few bags and things, and I take my sketchbook, eraser, and pencil along. I also leave a note on the bed, saying I've arrived and gone to the dojo.

I assume my face is still red, because the Twilight Knights don't mention my tardiness, except the director asks me to let him know next time. I just tell him that a good friend of mine died, and I'm not sure if I can handle much right now. He assigns me the door guarding duty. Good... I can sit and draw.

Nothing comes to mind. My wonderful creative spring can come up with anything it would like to see splayed across the white page.

An hour of this stagnant stare later, I'm relieved and told to go enjoy the con. I bow and thank the woman taking my spot.

They're playing cosplay chess in the gaming hall. Sweet... Let's see if I can stand to shout critical lines.

"Hey, it's Lucina!"

"Nice cosplay!"

"Whoa! That's a really good sword!"

Of course it's the gamers who note my cosplay. Fire Emblem hardly gets any love... but it's only a few who compliment me. I still get stopped for pictures, of course. I gave this cosplay my all... and it's still taking my all to look halfway composed, or at least composed enough to be in character.

Suffering of grief like this, I suppose, gives me just the ounce... gallon... ocean of sobriety I needed to be closer in likeness to Lucina.

I'm exhausted when I return to the dojo to check in. Exhausted enough to just plop down by a wall and nod off.

* * *

White.

That's all I see right now, varying tints of white and beige.

The ceiling is of course stone brick, painted to be pale. All the sheets are white. The only color in this room comes from its inhabitants.

There's a lot of red in here...

"Ooogh," I groan. Yup, there are those wounds I suffered. I couldn't even see what Validar did to me... I hate dark magic. I guess I owe my life to Shio two times now, instead of one.

"Hey!" Says a drunkenly cheerful voice. "Welcome to purgatory."

"Go to hell, Eldrad." I rest my head on my pillow. Owch. That's a scab, I bet. Lots of them. ... Dark magic needles?

"But I'm already here! I can't go to hell now." I've closed my eyes so I can't see anything, but I can just _smell_ a nyoro~n on Eldrad's face. I want to wipe it off with a good hard thwack of my Arcthunder.

I hear a grunt, the sound of a deep-voiced guy clearing out his throat. "This is no time for jokes, Eldrad," Chrom chastises. Then, more gently: "How are you feeling, Shanz?"

My reply is a long-held groan.

That's the best way to put it.

Oh, it ends with a slight sob.

Sumia went and died.

I'm in serious pain.

That's all I can think about.

Once, I would have... No, don't muse about that, you've already thought of it a million times. Fine. I'll be redundant. Here we go. Monologue.

Once, I would have regarded my situation as a fanciful daydream. I'd be a total badass. I wouldn't be the best, but I'd be good enough to impress people. I'd cut a dashing figure– cape flowing in the wind, hair tossed by momentum and inertia. Every step on the battlefield would be a part of a deadly dance, bringing about doom with every sweep of my wind magic. I'd get to marry the guy I liked. And I'd be content for the rest of my life.

I once craved this sort of escape.

Now I find myself wanting desperately for my normal life again. I want to have a regular sleep schedule. I want to have time to study, animate, draw, and write... I want to have time to waste. I want to leave Ylisse, I want to leave these poor saps who have to fight their war...

Except that would be cowardice, and I'm not the sort to crap out on life, now, am I? No, never. Perhaps once, in an hour of despair, but that's long past.

Even if I'm still resolved to stay here... It's like promising to sleep through a nightmare until morning. Just because you want your miserable friends to have company...

Because... They're your friends. Because you'd never abandon them. It's in your blood, right? You love family history... and Dad said... you were descended from knights.

Knight in a past life, perhaps. That would be cool, I guess. And then in this life I get to be a knight again.

It's what I always wanted, isn't it?

To suffer this nightmare.

"Hey, isn't this the second time she's nearly died? I heard about the first." Eldrad, stop making me want to strangle you. You're not helping at all.

I hear Frederick's voice. There's some relief. "At last count, yes, unless one marks each instance of direct disobedience." Well, thanks, love. I finally hear the comfort of your voice to find you kicking me.

I groan while Chrom defends me. "Frederick, I'm sure she wasn't ignoring orders this time." Thanks, boss, but... I need to stick up for myself.

"Yeah," I groan, sitting up and opening my eyes. I look Frederick right in the face. "I was following them. Robin gave me the OK to go and mop the floors along with Sumia..." Oh, we mopped them, all right, and then stained them afresh... Gods, why?

I note a bitter silence while I keep down a painful lump in my throat. I lie back. "And then that fight happened. OGH!" My wounds throb for a moment, then I recover. "That hurts."

"About that," Chrom says hesitantly. Did his voice just shake? I think it did. "She... Sumia's..."

I make this easier for him. "Dead, I saw." I sniffle loudly. DAMN it, stop making a fucking scene! "That's why I was in such a rage..." It's an easy emotion to recall. I felt like a raging dragon, ready to tear Validar apart with my bare hands, if I could but reach him. And then I fell, something my body hadn't expected, my heart had not realized was possible, while my mind knew that could be the only outcome.

Rage is much easier to recall than joy right now.

"You should have fled. You nearly died there, too." Chrom, shut up. If you'd been in that situation, I know exactly what you would have done. You would have torn the palace apart.

How do I explain the thoughts which just passed my mind by? "Only my mind knew I would lose. The other parts of me thought it impossible, unimaginable, while I was so angry..." i just want to stop thinking, to lay in a stagnant state of blankness. Surely that would be better than the grief I suffer of now.

"No discipline," Frederick sighs.

No discipline, he says. I've been told to hold my fucking stance for half an hour, and he says I have no discipline? I'd like to hear that again. I sit up. "Say that again?" A snarl is present on my face. "Go on, tell me I have no discipline. I can beat you in any test of patience or discipline, I can hold a fighting stance until I fucking drop. If I possessed no discipline, I would be dead by now."

"You do a really good job of showing it," Eldrad yawns. Oh, not punching him for this is taking all my discipline. All of it.

I need to put this angry energy to SOME use. I get the fuck out of bed, it's time I stopped laying about. Oogh. It hurts, but I don't care. I can ignore it until it stops hurting.

"This I mark under stubbornness, Shanzira, not discipline." Frederick, shut up. Just shut the hell up. I do NOT need to be bothered in this state. You know what I need? Solitude. Good old solitude. I'll be back to my old self in no time with some of that.

I march out the door, desperately hiding the pain from my face. "Leave me alone. If you're worried for me, solitude is what I need. Go away." Just keep putting one foot in front of the other, and fuck the way you're feeling. It takes more than a little boo-boo like this to put you out of action.

I hear Frederick speaking to Chrom. "It seems your concerns are unfounded, milord. We only lost... one Shepherd last night." Hesitation's skittered about his voice, probably because I'm not the only one grieving for Sumia. "It would appear Shanzira is entirely capable of functioning in this state, albeit... Not entirely herself."

I hear a low sniff. "Sumia... Didn't deserve to die..."

We both feel that way, boss. Both of us. I wish I could have done _something_... But no, I was busy recoiling in the corner, without a fucking _clue_ of what was going on.

Gods damn it.

These guys don't deserve me letting them down like this. I'm an idiot. I failed them... Not only did I get Sumia killed, but I nearly died myself. Damn it... damn it... damn it...

"Shanzira." I look up. Robin. Okay. "I have your coat."

You mean my cheap fake imitation? Yeah, thanks. Sorry I wrecked the original. I shed Robin's coat and hand it to her, blood and all. "Sorry about the state of yours," I say as I take mine back and don it again.

She waves a hand at me, as though waving away my protest. "Don't worry about it." ... Is it me, or is her voice choked? ... Oh, right. She blames herself. Silly Robin... You couldn't have known... But I did, and I didn't tell you... "Are you sure you're well enough to walk?"

I snort. "What do you take me for, some kind of wimp? A broken collarbone didn't stop me." And I'll be damned if a bit of dark magic downs me.

Robin nods at me. "All the same, don't... Don't push yourself. Please." I kick myself hard enough to look into her eyes, and note they're glossy with tears. Thaaaat's riiight... Not only does she blame herself, but she also takes it really personally... She's fond of just about everyone here... and doesn't want me to die. Right. So she's worried about me. Okay.

I raise my chin up. "I swear to you, Robin, I will not die. I will outlive this war. No Plegian general will kill me. It would take worse wounds than this for me to succumb. My family's always been sturdy, and we can take shit. You don't need to worry about me."

This is less about personal pride and more about comforting the tactician. Both do play a role in this, though.

Robin nods and closes her eyes. A tear falls to the floor. "Thank you... For surviving... I shouldn't have ordered you to... to..."

I cut her off. "You couldn't have seen it coming. Don't do this to yourself." I'll be damned if I let the tactician beat herself up over this.

Robin sniffs. Realizing she's too worked up to function at a hundred percent (or so I assume), she walks away. "Excuse me," she croaks in doing so.

You're excused. Go get some rest, love. I wave a hand to her and turn around. Oh. Hello, bunny-rabbit.

"Man-spawn," Panne addresses me, stoic and cold. Why's she always have to glare like that? It's so mean...

I nod my head and then tilt it sideways. "Hiya. Anything you need?" Just appear put-together, Shanz, you can do it. It's not that hard, there, your tears are drying. Or they're draining into your nose yes they're doing that fuuucccckkkkk.

Panne squints slightly, focusing in on my eyes. "Why do you refuse to weep for your lost friend?"

Oh, shut the hell up. Ask the most wounding question you can, why don't you? AUGH!

My lips raise ever-so-slightly in a snarl. "Look. I hate crying, okay? It's a sign of weakness, it draws attention, and I hate both of those things. So just... Ugh." I take a huge breath in through my nose to clear it. Yegh.

The way Panne's looking down at me, she seems to be sneering at me. Bitch. "Was she truly worth so little to you that her passing is not worthy of your tears?"

Fuck you, Panne. Why? Just, why? Why can't you leave me the fuck alone? I don't want to grieve surrounded by people. "Please leave me alone." That's all I manage to choke out before I slip away to the side. I hear a small "hmph" out of Panne before she's out of earshot. At least, out of my earshot. Friggin' bunny ears.

I bet she's really soft. I could use a plush right now. Ah, where's my unicorn? In my dorm... and I'm at Fanime. Gods damn it.

Okay, what did I do last time I lost someone dear? That was when my dog died... I wailed and went to the swingset. Okay. We don't have swings, but we have something better.

I straighten my back and summon the willpower for a brisk walk to the stables, trying desperately to ignore the ogles and whispers of various servants and nobles. Sadly, the more I try to ignore sounds, the clearer they become:

"Didn't one of the Shepherds die last night?"

Shut up.

"That girl, isn't she a soldier? What's she doing walking about with such wounds?"

I'm not a little girl. Shut up.

"Some tactician the Prince has, if she let one of his men die. What a great job the Shepherds are doing, eh?"

You did _not_ just insult Robin. Oh, I'd kick your ass... if I were but strong enough for it. Just shut the fuck up.

The stables might normally stink to high heaven (horse dung, ok?), but my nose is a little too clogged for me to notice. My sense of smell is flat-out pathetic sometimes. I make my way to Caeda's stable... and droop myself over the little gate. "Hello, there," I squeak, reaching a hand forward to pet her neck.

She gives me a snort and a whinny. I give a humorless chuckle in return. "Yeah, you probably don't give two figs about me." I don't feel incensed to swear around animals. They're just as cute as kids. "You been fed today?" I glance around for an empty oat bucket.

Caeda nods just as I notice it. Yep. Okay. "Good. I don't... I don't want you to starve just 'cause Sumia... just 'cause she's gone." I can't even bring myself to say it. Ugh. I look straight down at the ground and absent-mindedly pat the pegasus. She's so soft... Like my plush unicorn... "I'm sorry... I'm sorry..." I draw in a ragged breath, a sign that I'm about to wail. "I'm so sorry she's gone," I sob. I wrap both arms around her neck, but loosely. I don't want her to think I'm strangling her or anything. She's a sweetie. I just want to be her friend.

_"Neeeiiiiigggghhhh."_ That was a loud one. I look up, straight into her eyes, and I see her shake her head.

Oh, that's what she means. "Lookie, love, I'm not blaming myself... I just... I just wish I _could_ have helped..." Sniff. "I'm sorry I'm dumping this all over you... You shouldn't have to... have to... deal with me. I'm sorry..."

Those two words, so commonly said, yet they're so perfect for this. _I'm sorry._ It's one of the only phrases that doesn't lose its power with usage.

I feel soft fur against my cheek. Aw, Caeda, you sweetie... I rub her neck again. "You're a good listener. Better than all the humans. Thanks." I hug her a little more tightly, then I let her go. She flicks her tail and paws at the ground impatiently.

I think I know what she wants. "You wanna go out flying?"

That was a rather eager nod.

"Okay, then." I open the gate and put a harness on her, and grasp the reins gently. "Do you mind if I look after you now?"

She steps out and nuzzles me again. Okay, I'm really fond of that gesture. It's like her meaning of a hug. I guess that means she's okay with it. Okay.

"So may I rename you then? It's an old tradition from back home." Caeda looks to me with intelligent eyes, curious. "Okay, then. How about, um..." What's a good one... Fiora? No, too depressing. "Elincia?" That's a good one.

She whinnies happily, tossing her head up. Well then, I'll call her Elincia now. Sweet little pegasus. "Let's go out and fly," I say with a smile. Yeah, that was my plan all along. Hush. It does me some good to have wind in my face.

And this way, no one can hear me cry.

* * *

Elincia's a really nice pegasus. Really nice. It was fun, flying on her. I've put her away in the stables, I gave her an apple, and brushed her down. Head to toe. She let me know whenever I did it wrong, too. Heh.

I'm in a better mood now. That always lifts my spirits.

I keep getting stares from everyone. THESE are stares of incredulity, they can't believe I have half a smile on my face at a time like this. These are the stares I don't mind. Let them gawk at my strength. I've healed, I'm just waiting for everyone else to do so.

I go and find a comfortable place to sit. Ah, this is a comfy-looking chair. Plop. Ooh, I could fall asleep in this. Reminds me of this one time, at grad night, I fell asleep in a chair with arms just this height–

"Mother?"

WHSUHXSUYCGHSU!

I look to see the pillar of green which is Noel. Good gods, why was that necessary? I settle back into my prone position and rub my eyes. "Holy sh... Holy moly, Noel, don't scare me like that."

I see her shoulders rise a little in apprehension. "Sorry," she says sheepishly. "It's just, I heard one of the Shepherds died and I was worried it might be you."

I shake my head, the movement lagged by exhaustion. "Nope. Was Sumia."

She raises her hands to cover her mouth; they crash into her mask. "Oh my gods... I'm so sorry... You two were really good friends in my future..."

I sigh and recline a bit more. "I'll be fine, Noel. You don't need to worry about Mommy. I can understand you doing that, though; when I was a kid, every time my mother left the house for more than an hour, I started to worry that something might have happened to her."

Noel steps back and regards me curiously. "... Yeah, I think I can see you as a kid."

Scowl.

"Did you have to say that?"

Noel cringes slightly. "Sorry."

I sigh again. Good god, she's like me around my dad, but worse. I clamber out of the chair and give her a tiiiigggghhhht hug. "Stop worrying, love, you're just fine. You're a real sweetling." I let her go. "Now skedaddle before someone sees and your cover's blown. Oh, wait."

"Hm?" She was just about to skedaddle, too.

"May I trade you my Elwind for that Arcwind you have? I need to upgrade." I give her this silly, sheepish smile.

She smiles bright at me. "Nah, I'll just give it to you! I can always buy a new one. Here!" She stuffs the surprisingly heavy tome into my hands.

I could kill a cat with this thing. It's a daunting text of magical frivolity and practical japery.

Oh, gods, yes. Ladies and gentlemen, we have a new Colonel Sassacre.

Noel notes my evil grin, as she chuckles behind her mask. "Have fun with it, Mother. And I'll do as you requested and, um, skedaddle. Bye-ya!" She turns and dashes off, with me waving behind her.

She really does take after me, gods, she's so CUTE. I can't wait until we recruit her.

Now I should go spread my cheer around. Who could use it... Shio! Yeah, let's see if I can't cheer her up. I dash off to find my tall blonde buddy.

"Shio! Let's have a doodleparty!"

She turns around, confused at first, then she realizes what the hell just happened and puts on a smile. "Sure! Just lemme grab my sketchbook. Whaddaya wanna draw?"

I tilt my head sideways as an "eh" gesture. "Just some shenanigans with the Shepherds. I'd like to be able to show them this crap." Oh boy, this is gonna be good. See, normally, Shio's doodles are straight-up too weird to show people, particularly the Shepherds, but if we make them more cutesy, then we can show 'em off. Her doodles are the best. This one time, she made a gag out of why Chrom's cape always flowed in the wind in the game (which it doesn't here, sadly), and the headcanon Nin and I have come up with it was I made it flow like that via wind magic. She drew that, it's so cute.

She looks a little bit uncertain. "Uh, okay." She must not be used to drawing normal people things. "What kind of shenanigans?"

Now what fits under "cutesy"? "Hm... Why not romantic stuff? That way we get to discuss shipping for the first time in practically forever." OH GODS Thanks to FE13, we had shipping discussions where before they hadn't existed (I'm not much of a shipper, as I've established). Now we get to have those once again. Oh sweet.

"Okay." She seems to brighten up here. Romance is something she can do without being too creepy. "What pairings do you think will happen?"

Let's ninja in the obvious. "I'm calling Chrom–Robin right here and now." If that ship doesn't happen, I need to learn to make edible hats.

Ok, the explanation behind that joke is long. I'll tell it later.

"Of course," This was almost a sigh. Let's face it, that's a given. "Who else? Hm... What about Frederick?"

I give her an affronted snort, which is contrasted by a smirk. "Obvious!" We know I'm marrying Frederick, I just need to reach the S support. "Now, your turn. How about Sully?"

She puts a finger to her chin, covering an old scar (she once had a mole there and got it removed, that's where it came from). "Vaike. Or Virion. Your turn again."

I pause. Hm. Then an evil thoughts hits me, but I can't just throw out a guess on it. "You?"

She blinks. "Huh?"

I show her my smirk. "You heard me! Who are YOU going to marry?" Shio and... Shio and who? Come on, love, who're you gonna marry?

Stammering, she backs away as though to escape the conversation. "I– I don't– I don't think I'll marry anyone..." That last part came out ashamedly.

Aw, please. She's not me, she can marry people. She's not the hero. I renew my shit-eating grin. "Gotta marry _someone!_ Pick one, as long as it isn't Henry." I will die before she marries Henry.

"Okay, um..." She lies back to think. "How about Gaius?"

I give her a shrug. "Works for me. Didn't you marry him in the game?" Knowing her, though, she might marry just about anyone. Hm...

She sits back up to reel off short list. "Well, him, Stahl, and Henry..." Her eyes focus on me. "What about you, huh? You married Chrom."

Ugh!

In a rush: "Everyone marries Chrom. Nin did. I didn't even MEAN to marry him, at least, I just went, "okay yeah fine let's make the hero my husbando–""

Shio's smiling at me. "And then you couldn't stop fangirling for several months."

"SHUT UP!" OH MY GODS SHIO WHY. "Oh, gods, that's so embarrassing... Besides, I also married Frederick..." Yeah, in like, a spare playthrough. Somemoby krill me. Actually, Chrom and Frederick are the only dudes I married ingame. Chrom's off-limits for obvious reasons, that just leaves Frederick.

Sweet, hot, Frederick.

I should go cheer him up.

Shio sees my smile and chuckles, knowing my mind just had a wiki walk. "Heh. It's been a while since we last had a conversation like this."

I look back up at her. "You mean the kind where we embarrass each other to hell and back?" Like we just did? Oh, gods.

"Yep! Aw, it's so much fun."

She's just begging for it.

I take but one second to put together my approach. "Put yourself in my shoes." Hand on chest, pointing to self. "I swear you–" point at her– "had a thing for Stahl. That was when I finally managed to infect you with the fangirl syndrome." Seriously, I tried for years before that happened. And then it did. I won the damn war.

She immediately squirms. Aw, she even has her fingers over her lips to try and shush me! That's so cute. "Ugghhh, stop it! Shanz! What if someone overhears?!"

MISSION. FUCKING. ACCOMPLISHED.

My eyebrows raised in a Severa-esque smirk, "I still say you're too easily embarrassed–"

She lurches forward and puts her hands on my mouth to silence me. "SHANZIRA! Seriously!" She then sits back, very briefly wondering what to do (she just silenced her bff), then with a "gah!" she stands and runs off.

I sit there stunned. Did _not_ see that coming. "Whoa... Whoops... Didn't mean for that to happen. I'll just, um, apologize later." I get up. "In the meantime... There's drawing to be done. I still have project shirtless to work on, among other things..." I hold out my fingers and tick them off in a list. "Oh, yeah, and there was one other thing I wanted to draw."

But when I think about it, it's an embarrassing project. I mean... I actually need a reference for it this time. Urgh. Why does the real thing have to be different from the ingame version?

No, I'm not about to go draw Frederick. That wouldn't be awkward in the slightest.

Fuck it. I'm not going to squirm like a little wimp. I'm going to go out and do it. I don't care how awkward I feel. I need to get this right. I call along the hallways. "Um, Chrom? Chrooooom? I need your help with something!"

"What are you shouting about?" He's right behind me. At this point, I'm used to it, so I stop jumping. Instead, I smoothly about-face.

I brighten my face into a smile with which to greet him. Always greet people with smiles. "Oh, there you are. Can you stand still for a moment?"

He sees the treasure I hold in my fingers. "Is that your sketchbook? It dawns on him at last. "Ah, I see. You want to draw me."

I give him a big, energetic, childish nod. I always try to make myself appear smaller and lesser in front of authority, it disarms people. "Mm-hmm! Wanna make sure I get your face right."

He smiles and pulls up a nearby chair to have a seat. "Well, draw away. May I see it when you finish?"

PFFDSMKSHDJK! "Don't move! And uh," I should answer his question, "that might be a while." Let me explain. "I'm just sketching to get the general idea down so I'll have something to copy later at my convenience. It'll be some time before I finish the final product, I'm afraid!" I put one hand behind my back in slight embarrassment.

He's quiet, looking at me but not moving. Oh, great.

I try to break the awkwardness. "Wow, I feel like I'm talking to a brick wall– Not that it's your fault, I mean, I did tell you to shut up. Sorry." I just told a prince to shut up, oh gods. That's excessively rude. "Umm... I should probably try to fill the silence anyways, to dull the edge off your boredom." That is, provided the sound of my voice doesn't totally annoy him.

It's not like I can tell, he won't say anything.

"So, uh..." Find a conversation topic, Shanz. THERE IT IS! Honest compliments! Yeah! And throw in commentary! It's as easy as writing an essay! "Did anyone ever tell you you look really nice? Even when your outfit's a total mess." There's a strange sort of savage fairness in a mess, i love it. "It's the reason I've been meaning to draw you properly at some point– actually, you're not the only one, everyone around here is drop-dead handsome." Especially Frederick. Oh, gods, Frederick. Hnnnnggggg. I can't wait 'till we hit S rank.

And Chrom might have thoughts on this, but I can't fucking tell, I asked him not to talk.

So I just blabber on with my thoughts. "Especially Frederick, oh gods. I don't know what it is with me and the loyal knight archetype, but for some reason I keep daydreaming about–" The fuck am I saying? "Shit, what am I rambling about? Never mind any of that!" I hit myself in the face with my sketchbook.

A smile and a slight chuckle crack through Chrom's silence. "Haha. I think any man around here would be lucky to have you. You don't need to shut yourself away like that."

"Hush, hush, hush!" I'm still hiding my face, it must look like a cherry right now. "I'm drawing you, remember? Oh gods, this is embarrassing. I rambled about that topic in front of you, of all people." My fucking boss. "Pretty sure you don't need to know all the extraneous details." There IS a thing called TMI, after all. "Anyways, I'm done."

He stands and stretches, then pushes the chair away. I could swear I heard something crack, maybe the wood. "Conversations like these build bonds, and these bonds are what keep this army together. I don't mind listening to you, Shanz."

Huh...? "Wait, you just... Okay, fine." Quick recovery. I whisper to myself to properly organize my thoughts. "So this is a support conversation? Wait, does that mean...?"

"Did you say something?"

Oh, right, don't whisper when there are people nearby, especially your boss. I brighten up again with a cutesy salute. "Oh, nothing," I sing at him. "Anyways, I'd better go work on that artwork! Bye!" I turn and skip off, though each skip covers little distance. I want to eavesdrop, he's talking to himself.

"She acts timid, yet she had few issues with approaching me and talking about herself." From the tone of his voice, he could be scratching his head. "I don't even know what to make of her..."

Okay, I speed up now. I confused the boss, great. I round the corner, then droop, almost anime-style. "That was so embarrassing!" I rub my face to try and send back the redness. "I suppose I'd better add an artwork of Frederick to the tally as well, if I can stop nosebleeding long enough to draw him. Or," I come up with a creepy idea that Shio might have thought of, "I could draw him using the blood from my nose... But that would be kind of creepy." Thus why I called it Shio-esque.

I shrug all this off and glance at my sketchbook, satisfied with the sketch I got. At least I'm not moping around now.

* * *

**AND THAT IS CHAPTER 17. ANGST. RELIEF. STUFF.**

**I get my stitches removed in a couple of days. These things hurt more than the actual cut. Oh, I added a drawing to my deviantART, it's Shanz's ref for this. Unfortunately, with my scanner nonfunctional, I had to take a photo of it. OH WELL. Enjoy~**


	18. Midnightmare

**Author's notes: I AM SORRY FOR THE LAG. Really. I have been heavily distracted by G2G; honestly, the guy is really fun to talk to. I will try to get back on a faster update schedule. Oh, speaking of G2G: ASLEEP GOT A TROPES PAGE. GOD DAMN IT I LOST. (We had a bet on who would get a tropes page first, although we both knew he'd get it first. Sigh. You can't win 'em all... And sadly this little fic isn't as crazily popular as Asleep.**

**Oh yeah, I went and edited all the chapters, because I remembered a few tidbits about peoples' personalities. For example, Chrom frequently shortens people's names: Emmeryn to Emm, Donnel to Donny. And since EVERYONE calls Nineeyena and Shanzira Nin and Shanz, respectively, it would be in character for him to use the shortened version.  
Makes me wonder why he didn't shorten "Maribelle" to "Mari". She'd probably be irate if he did so, heh.**

**Chapters are at normal length again, oh yeah.**

* * *

This is a much better day than yesterday. Yesterday I felt like crap, moping around helplessly like... Some depressed delinquent. Now, I've got my energy back. I can actually YELL OUT MY BATTLE CRIES in the workshops (yes, we do that. Sometimes) and kick serious ass. Yesterday I was back to being bottom rung on the ladder; today, no more.

Woop. Got a workshop to do. Spears, my favorite. Spears are the best, always. Shio does a great Chinese water spear, she's fucking hard to predict. The whole point of water spear is to fake out your enemy, keep them guessing as to what you're about to do. She keeps waggling her spine about so it's impossible to tell what she's about to do.

Me, I just dive right in and kick her butt, fuck those tricks. She takes forever with 'em. If I can beat her before she fakes me out, then I'm gold.

My personal favorite spear technique is the English standard. Easy to figure out, it's not wimpy like water spear nor it does it require damn heavy spears like the Celtic style. I mean, just... God damn Celtics and their logs.

The director's yakking about how it works, that this is an interactive workshop, and... Yawn.

Oh no.

Not yawning.

Gods damn it, Robin. What's going on NOW?!

I shift in my seat just a little bit to make sure I won't fall off, and right after that, my eyes close and I find myself being shaken awake by Robin.

* * *

"WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON **_NOW?!_**" Seriously, HOW many times have I been woken up this way? First by Frederick, now by Robin?! WHAT THE SHIT?! AND RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF A WORKSHOP? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!

Robin jumps back, startled by my outburst. "It's another attack in the night. I didn't think we'd face more assassins, but the good and bad part is that they don't seem interested in Emmeryn." Hey, she's still in her nightclothes. The humor of this mitigates my temper somewhat. Look at that nightgown. Seriously, pink?

Well, shit. I know who these guys are, then, even if just a little. The douchebags chasing after Shio and I, yes? Okay, fine. I get to try out this new tome Noel gave me. I crack it open. The thing's a little old, eh? The leather binding's all scuffed and scratched, and there's writing on the inside.

... What the...

These aren't chants. These are drawings. This is a sketchbook! This is a used-up tome turned into an impromptu sketchbook! WHAT THE FUCK, NOEL?!

Well, the good news is that I'm pretty sure she didn't mean to give me this. I hastily stuff it under my pillow, and answer Robin's confused look with "wrong book". I pick up the arcthunder I wielded before, and stuff it into my coat pocket. Oh, yeah, I don't want to forget my spear. I keep forgetting how fun it is to stab people. Seriously, the others should try it.

"Let's get, Robin." I'm full prepared– boots, coat, everything. Robin is still throwing her coat on.

"You don't need to tell me." Her voice is slightly muffled by fabric. "I'll be much more careful this time."

She's referring to Sumia's death. Riiight... She still blames herself. Gods damn it, Robin, I told you, it's not your fault. I slam the door open and we rush out. There's an unfamiliar dude not garbed in the Ylissean uniform, so I fry him real quick. He drops, cooked like bacon and dead as a doornail.

"Good eye," Robin says, briefly checking the corpse. "One less assassin." I smile; looks like I'm not totally useless.

Yes, I always think that when I get a complement. Shush. I have insecurities.

Another pair of assassins come our way. They pause, glancing at each other (probably because their quarry wears the same cloak at this white-haired chick), then rush at me. Good, they have enough brains to understand that the redhead's their target.

Wait, that's not good, it's bad. What the fuUUCKKK SHOOT I GOTTA FRY HIM OR SOMETHING OKAY STAB STAB STAB okay good they're dead. I'm not sure what happened, I just freaked out. I stabbed the nearer one three times in the chest, and I think Robin roasted the other one. Okay. Phew. I'm not dead. I ought to mention this to Robin, it's important. "Is it just me, or do they only seem interested in me?"

She shrugs, then interrupts it with a yell and a hand. "Heads up, arrows!"

I grope for my tome, then I realize it's a fucking arcthunder. "SHIT WRONG TOME!" I managed to take a few steps, but one misaimed arrow manages to lodge itself in my shoulder. Ow. Okay, seeing that I'm not screaming, it must be pretty sharp. (What I meant to do was use a wind tome to create a wind barrier to misdirect the arrows.)

I am not looking forward to having that pulled out.

Wait. I belatedly wonder something: Where the fuck did these archers come from? Aw, shit. I must have failed to spot someone, and that someone ran back to let his buddies know of my whereabouts... Welp. Wonderful.

"Well, fuck," I comment on this whole scene. "I'll live." I shrug it off, trying not to wince at the sharp pain in my shoulder.

Robin readies her tome to use, then glances at me. "You sure?"

I roll my neck around. "Yeah, I can take shit." Besides, I don't have much choice. "Looks like we're the only ones in this hall–"

"Robin! What's going on?!"

That was Chrom. "I stand corrected," I sing happily. Chrom's here, we're safe. Whoo. The guy with plot armor is here to save our skins. He stops right next to Robin, and I duck behind him. I see him as being a brick wall or something I can hide behind. The guy's been nearly impossible to kill in my experience.

Robin answers the question, since I'd just open up "is your name Robin"-type snarks if I did. "More assassins. They don't seem interested in Emmeryn, but I've noticed they seem to target Shanzira."

Chrom glances at me, as though wondering what about me makes me so targetable. Truthfully, I'm not sure myself. I should try capturing their leader or something.

But something more pressing hits me. "Can I trust you two to watch this hallway? I gotta make sure Shio's safe." And Welsh, and Nin, and Eldrad... Hopefully they're safe. But I need to make su–

Robin yanks me back by the hood. "Excuse me, Shanzira, but last time I checked, I'm the tactician." Oh, for the love of... Okay, fine, I get it: I shouldn't be giving orders.

Then I'll hand her an excuse and hope it sticks. "Mages don't make good frontline units."

Robin points to the ground near her and looks at me with an iron face. "Shanzira, stay here."

Oh. I get it, this is to see if I have enough discipline to obey orders. In that case, I snap to attention, heels together, feet forty-five degrees away from each other, both hands holding my spear several inches off the ground. "Yes, sir!" I shout in as much of a military manner as I can manage.

Chrom looks reasonably impressed by this. "So you do know how to follow orders." He turns his head back to the fray.

"Permission to speak, sir!"

There's a pause as Robin hits an assassin with Elthunder, then speaks. "Permission granted."

I let out a sigh and explain myself. "Took me all of two seconds to realize this was a test. Besides, I also realized that I'm more useful here than scurrying about like a mouse."

Robin nods while Chrom pulls a double take, having slain a few assassins. "Do you realize there's an arrow in your shoulder?"

I nearly forgot about that. "Yes?"

Chrom immediately swears. "Damn. LISSA!"

Oh fuck, that arrow's about to get pulled, isn't it. Shit. I hear Lissa's voice as her delicate footsteps echo (but only slightly) through the hall. "Oh my gods is that a shoulder wound?! Shanz! Why didn't you call for a healer?!"

Uggghhhh. "Figured there were none nearby." I spot a few assassins coming in; three, one for each of us. "HELLO!" I dash forward and impale the nearest, letting his corpse slide off the blade afterwards. I duck back quickly when his two buddies swipe at me, then let Chrom and Robin take advantage of the wonderful opening I just made for them.

All the warning I get is a brief sigh before pain explodes in my shoulder. "OW OW OW OW OH GODS WHY?!" I scream.

Just as the itch takes over, I hear Lissa say sadly, "because arrows are meant to hurt when they're removed." She sounds honestly tired of this, but I know she's not about to stop. Soldiers will fight wars, and healers like her will heal.

"Okay, yeah," I scratch where my wound was, "I get that. Oohh." Being healed sucks almost as much as carrying around a wound for a while, but at least it ends faster. "Ugh. Can I join those two," I point my thumb at the fray, "so I can actually help out?"

She brightens up immediately. "Rule number one!" That's all she squeaks before breaking down into giggles.

She managed to put a smile on my face. Aww. "You got it, Lissa." I twist around, spear flashing, and leap in to stab a guy who was about to cut into Robin. "Whee!"

Now, if only I had music. Some Blazblue would go really well with this. Perhaps White Requiem would be the best? Hm. Perhaps Nightmare Fiction would be better. Seems I keep picking Ragna's themes, heh.

... The hell with it. Condemnation wings it is. Let's see how well I've learned the lyrics over the time I've had this song on my iPod. Well enough to sing a capella, I hope.

I proceed to hog experience like a noob-wielded Jeigan. That is to say, I kill ALL the bad guys! Mainly because they keep going after me. I'm really glad I learned how to block well. (A year or so ago, when I was still new to the Twilight Knights, I always lost three-point bouts because I couldn't block right.) Welp, I kicked ass!

"Shanzira, stay back!" Robin shunts me away. "They're going after YOU!"

Well, jesus, lady. I'm the one mopping the floor here, you think I'm incompetent? "There's hardly any need to worry, Robin. Takes more than these guys to roast me." I step forward to jump back in, but Robin pushes me yet again. "Ugh!" Well, fine, if she's going to be stubborn and insist I'm no longer helpful... "Permission to check on my friends, sir!"

"Permission granted!" She bolts a swordsman, not looking at me at all. "We'll hold this hallway!"

Chrom and Robin, with Lissa healing them.

... OTP.

Yeah, I can leave this area happily. I turn and bolt. A few empty hallways down, I find Shio and Eldrad. "Hey, you two okay?!" I skid to a stop next to them.

"I think so?" Shio's unsure, but she doesn't look scratched. Her robe has NO stains in it, which tells me she's been firing from a distance, or Eldrad's kept her away from the fight– oh, wait, her tome's got quite a few blank pages. Yep, she's been helping, just from afar. "Eldrad's hurt..."

I look over to our tallest buddy. "Yeah, I got my arm singed," he says conversationally, "and I still haven't recovered from the last cliff encounter." The fuck? The way he's saying it, he could be stretching. Guy's been working out since he woke up in this world, I remember him being wimpy.

"Beg pardon?" That's all I can really bring myself to say. Were this Skype or something, I'd say it more simply: "?"

He grunts this next bit more painfully. "Wyverns can breathe fire. I had to jump out a window and into a pond."

"Oh gods." I step forward, assuming my stance. "Let me take over." He's not in much condition to fight if he's burned.

He rolls his shoulders and locks a sword. "Your defense isn't that good. What if they land a hit?"

Oh, yeah, as if I hadn't already taken an arrow to the knee I mean shoulder. "I can take a fucking hit," I impatiently grumble, sticking an axeman like a pig (seriously, he was a little chubby). "I might not have a ridicu-OP shield on my side, but I'm a better lancer than you by miles." I butt-spike a cavalier off his horse and impale him on the ground. "Muscle memory, fuckass."

Eldrad, I think, figures he wants to be a smartass. "Ye wud be a better lancer, considerin' I dinnae use a lance." I swear I'm this close to introducing my butt-spike to his face and telling him to eat shit. "...Accent slipped, didn't it?"

Yes, it did. I know what bothers him, so I break out the southern: "Ah'm steel beddar ad fighdin' nan ya." (Donnel could probably understand me well. Actually, that's a support I want to read.)

He snorts and smirks, greeting a myrmidon in the face with his makeshift buckler which is actually a little to big to be a buckler. "Care tae prove tha' afterwards, lassie?" You askin' for a fight? I can turn this into a game much like the one Legolas and Gimli played at Helm's Deep. "Spekkin' of, why're we arguin' in th'middle o' a battle?"

I hand him a simple answer. "'Coss I fell like id." Note to self, kick Eldrad's ass.

"Welp," Shio interrupts, reminding us of her existance, "thank god I'm good at dark magic!"

... Yeah, she's been staving off the brunt of the foes coming at us. I owe her my life THREE times now. Gods damn it.

"Look, solution." Looks like Eldrad's attempting a compromise and he's stopped with his accent, which means I can stop with mine. "I'll jump in if you need covered, you deal with offense. That way I only need to use the shield arm. We good?"

I resist the urge to correct his grammar and once more earn myself the nickname of spellcheck. "Works for me, slowpoke." I take the lead once more, windshield-wiping away another lance and following it up with a stab.

"There's a difference between slow and pegasus, woman," he scoffs from behind me.

I hear a squelching noise as I shove the point of my spear through a downed assassin as a double-tap. "Oh, shut up." Ewwww. I do NOT like that noise. It's almost as bad as a loud CRACK as someone falls on their back.

I hear a lighter pitch voice from behind us. "Oh, hi guys." That is Welsh.

I don't glance behind me, that would be suicide. So I keep focused on the next bad guy as I shout, "A little tardy, aren't you?"

I can just _imagine_ a pose with this next part: "The hero is _always_ late!" He has a funny way of shouting. He picks ONE word in each sentence to stress when he shouts. For anyone who's played the second Pokemon Mystery Dungeon games, he's like Loudred. I'm dead serious.

FWUMP. "This is a battle. Being late is bad." And we have Ninny with her pegasus and reality checks. Ahh, Nin, how I love thee. I turn around at this, because I love pegasi.

If I love her so much, why do I say this next part? "Says the other late student."

I always nag people who are late. It's a habit I developed in elementary school that I was never able to shake. I'm rarely late, see, and there's always SOMEONE who's late. Normally more than one person. Nobody seems to care for their education.

"I was helping Lon'qu, Vaike, Panne, and Gaius hold a corridor." Ahhh. That's her explanation. Okay, I can accept that.

Welsh add: "I was there, too." He doesn't say it as though trying to save his skin, he says it more like he's throwing in an important edit. Like he doesn't want to miss out on his glory.

I chuckle. "Lon'qu must have been in hell with you around." With the BOTH of them around, I'd say. Pegasus knights are the most feminine warriors in the land, and then Welsh... Well, he's Welsh.

He's a little smug about this: "Well, _considering_ I saved his life..." Yeah, I have no bloody clue how that happened, but it did. Cheap ass.

Confused, Nin asks, "when was this?" Oh, yeah, she wasn't there for it, and I guess Shio never told her.

I roll my head around. "That one risen mission where I was teaching you magic." Nin nods in understanding.

The conversation lapses briefly, that silence brought to an end by Shio. "Um, guys? Can we stop talking and actually fight?"

Oh. Well. Shit. Um.

I smack my forehead, embarrassed. "Gods, we're like high school students."

Eldrad lightly smacks my shoulder. "Yes, you are. Now get to work!"

It occurs to me that he and Shio held this corridor by themselves while we three shot the breeze. Ugh. What a fail. Okay. Welsh, Eldrad, and I form out vanguard while Nin and Shio strike from the rear using their tomes. Meanwhile, I am the convenient red mage who can switch between them at any time.

If Eldrad wasn't injured, I'd be in the rear. But someone has to make up for his lack of offense, and Welsh can't do it alone.

We hear a shout behind us, it's Sully's voice: "Rally in the main hall! Come on, guys!"

And we twist about and sprint after her. Eldrad and I assume the rearguard, while Nin takes Welsh, and Shio sprints (having really long legs). We hold the assassins off juuust long enough for Miriel and Virion to range-attack them when we run into the hall.

The assassins seem to sense that the flow of battle has changed, and they need to adapt to the tide. The lot of them coalesce at the far end of the hall, at the front entrance. While they do that, Robin sorts out our ranks. Kellam, Stahl, Sully, Frederick, Eldrad, Chrom, Vaike and I form our frontline. Donnel, Gaius, Lon'qu, Welsh, and Panne are ready to switch out with any of us if need be, while Miriel, Virion, Shio, Nineeyena, and Ricken ready themselves for ranged attacks. Oh, yeah, we have Lissa and Maribelle standing by with heal staves.

They are so dead.

And thus we have Wah. We inch forward, together, and then clash; us Shepherds attempting to encircle the assassins without cutting themselves off. What happens is we sort of half-circle them.

Unfortunately, it seems their healers are actually around, and they have quite a few. These guys are annoyingly prepared. And the healers actually do their jobs. We're having serious trouble breaking their lines–

And then they sort of fall apart from the inside?

What?

"I brought help!" That voice! I recognize that high pitch– Noel?! What the shit?!

Sure enough, there she is! There are five others with her– It's hard to make out their figures, but one's definitely on a horse and another is... Whatever that sucker is, he or she is big. Wait, there's a seventh– which is an Anna. Oh boy.

At this point I have no fucking clue what's going on.

Whatever the case, the remaining assassins are being routed by these guys. I count Noel, a cavalier with some sweet lance skills, a Taguel– Yarne, maybe, or some other Taguel?– a thief, a soldier (as in he wields a spear and a skimpy-lookin' shield), and a tactician. By tactician I mean he has the fucking coat. He wields tomes and swords. Who am I forgetting? Oh, yeah, the Anna.

Now that the assassins are utterly collapsing, five of our helpers take their opportunity to amscray. Of course. Fuckers don't want to reveal themselves.

It's a rout. Unfortunately their commander killed himself before we could interrogate him. Shame. I guess they're real sticklers about revealing their secrets.

I approach Noel, who seems to be hurt, as there's a pool of red beneath her and she's hunched over. Poor girl. She... Oh Naga, she's hurt bad, her shoulder, she could bleed out like this.

"No... No... I can't..." That's what she's sobbing. "I came too far... to die now..."

And I quite agree with that sentiment. "Lissa needs to have a look at this. Or Maribelle."

I was just about to twist around and call for both of them when I hear someone interrupt: "Or me!" I twist around. Who's this doucheba– I mean bit– oh. Anna. Yeah, I should quit it with the insults. She squats down by Noel and pulls out a Mend staff. One lambent healing session later, Noel's shoulder practically sews itself back together. "You okay there, honey?" Anna asks cheerily. If the Shepherds had a cheer squad, Anna could lead it. She'd probably charge an arm and a leg to do so, though.

Noel nods, raising her mask just a bit to wipe tears. "I think so."

"Mmkay. If you need help, you can just ask me, okay, kiddo?"

Anna, indebted to Noel? Huh? I look up. "Am I missing something here?"

Anna shrugs. "Story for another time. I'm sworn to secrecy! But, sweetie, these are the people you wanted me to help, right?"

Noel stands and we all mirror this. "Yes. Thank you."

The merchant waves it off. "It's no big deal, sweetie, after what you did. Not everyone can make cuts that deep. And you weren't too stingy with your wallet afterward, either."

Knew it. Noel hired Anna as a makeshift mercenary or something. Of course it'd be that.

"Soooo, where can I talk to the captain?"

Oh, right, fellow redhead wants directions. I point my thumb at Chrom. "The prince of Ylisse, right there. You're going to join us?"

Anna flips a coin over in her fingers– which I believe Noel gave her– and answers me just before striding off: "And you'll never make a loss with me in tow!"

And then we recruited Anna.

I would assume Noel went and did those paralogue missions for us. Convenient. Now where is– aw, shit. My kid went and disappeared. Welp, nothing for it. I turn around to find my way back to bed.

"Shanzira, I need to talk to you?"

I briefly turn around to face that voice. Robin. Okay. My mind's already drifting off. "What about?" I mumble.

Her eyes narrow in concentration. "These assassins went straight for you and your friends. I need to know why."

"Honestly, Robin," I figured I'd open simply because I have no clue how else to say this, "I'm not sure myself. All I know is that..." Is that the ground is rushing up to meet me. Wait, this means– "Oh, fucking shit."

I wake up and rub my face. Stone floor hurts.

* * *

**THAT IS CHAPTER EIGHTEEN. WHEE. I figured these baddies needed more screentime, so screentime they got. Why not strike just when everyone's morale is down, eh?**

**ALSO PEOPLE PLEASE REQUEST SUPPORTS REQUESTS ARE GOOD FOR MY HEALTH AND YOURS. WHILE YOU'RE AT IT, GO VOTE IN THAT POLL ON MY PROFILE IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY! I might just lag if y'all don't. Seriously, I like knowing y'all's opinions.**

**G2G's going to update Asleep soon, he's almost done with 31.**

**Lamby out.**


	19. Wakened Legacy

**Author's notes: Okay, remember when I said I'd never do an update war again? Well, I'm really sick of my slow as heck update schedule right now, so to fix that, I started another one with GTG. I always do this, when I do something that exhausts me, I say "I'm never gonna do that again," then a few weeks later BAM I eat my own words.**

**ALSO! Daydreams and Nightmares now has a tropes page! WHOO! GO ADD STUFF TO IT, MY READERS! GO NOW, AND BE MY AWESOME FANDOM! I always wanted a fandom 8D**

**Oh, yeah, this chapter. Stuff happens in it. Like that really tiny support I threw into the support log earlier. Yeah. Here you go~**

* * *

Wow. Just wow.

I don't really have much to say about what just happened.

It's morning, I just woke up, my face friggin hurts, and all we know is that we just got attacked.

I have my iPhone on speaker, because I called Shio so she, Ninny and I can have a powwow. We're presently sharing information and figuring stuff out. Hard work, though. Let's open with the most fitting statement–

"What HAPPENED last night?" That is Shio's slightly distorted voice. This whole situation makes me think of a nasty hangover. We weren't even partying, for the love of Naga, we were defending our own skins.

Wait, I said for the love of Naga. Lordy, this is getting out of hand.

My response: "I have no bloody clue. Everything just went to shit, and I think it hit the fan." I conceal a grin, because let's face it–

"You are way too fond of "shit" phrases," Nin says. Yup, I am. They will never stop being funny to me. Shit jokes are great too, I'll crack up at these. It's just a funny word, like "butler". Shame it's a swear.

I hastily defend myself. "They're funny." Back to business. "Shio, did you catch anything that happened after the battle?" Heh. Shit jokes.

Disappointment is Shio's next tone. "No, I fell asleep right away, unfortunately..." And it's directed at herself. Poor girl needs to improve her self-esteem. Actually, she and Nin BOTH need to do that.

"Robin ran off to the library, Chrom shouted after her, Miriel said "interesting", and that's all I registered before I fell asleep," Nin recounts. Okay, cool, we have SOME idea of what we're going to suffer through tonight.

I yawn. "Well, we're fucked." Gotta communicate with everyone else, though. "Lemme see if Welsh is on Skype." I get up, trying to ignore my sore legs, and plop myself down in my spinny chair (sweet relief! My hamstrings burn). I wake the computer, which automatically logs me into Skype. "Ah, he is." There's that green "available" icon. I click it and type away, intending to grab his attention.

Lamby: ! Hey!

A few minutes pass. He's not too attentive about his computer.

Welsh: What.

Lamby: Did you catch anything before you fell asleep an hour ago?

Yet another pause. God damn it, Welsh.

Welsh: Um, no.

Lamby: As in, hear anything about how the Shepherds reacted to all that bullshit?

Welsh: Oh yeah I heard Frederick say something about how it's like an old fairy tale.

THANK YOU!

Lamby: Huh. Sleeping Beauty?

Welsh: I dunno I didn't hear him finish!

Lamby: Ooooookay. Welp, that's all.

Welsh: Ok

Lamby: See you tomorrow?

Welsh: I guess

I log off. Welp, that was somewhat helpful. If only getting it from him had't taken forever. I turn around to Nin and my iPhone. "Apparently Frederick said something interesting."

Nin shrugs while I hear something like a "huh?" from Shio. "Well, we'll just have to wait until tonight." That's all she has to say on the matter.

"Um, guys?" Oh, crap, yeah, Shio probably couldn't hear that. Stupid phone.

I jump up from my chair and inhale. Time to project! "FREDERICK SAID IT SOUNDED LIKE A FAIRY TALE."

I have absolutely no problem getting my voice loud. I have been _trained_ for this. I could be Robin's personal megaphone if she wanted one. I hear an "ohhh!" of understand, then we say our see-yous and hang up. I put my coat on and pick my stuff up to prepare for class.

I exit my dorm, stifling a yawn, and make my way to my classes. I groan to myself when I'm sure no one's in earshot: "I do _not_ look forward to falling asleep..."

* * *

Okay, maybe this isn't so bad. It's quiet, I don't hear Robin shuffling around or anything. I'm going to laze for a bit, I want to see if I can figure stuff out before I get up.

I might've mentioned this before, but back in high school, I could fool anyone into thinking I was asleep. I'd put my head down and close my eyes to rest them, and in a few minutes I'd hear people complaining that I was asleep. I could do this, the teacher would call on me to answer a question, and I'd raise my head up real quick for the sole purpose of blurting the right answer, then return it straight to its resting position.

I'd always get up with my neck hurting slightly, but I got used to it. Four years will do that to you.

Still quiet in here. Wait, there's a slight shuffling noise, it's very faint. As in my breathing almost covers it up. So someone really stealthy's in here. Gaius or Panne.

Let's see if I can properly mimic a sleepy toss. HUP!

Okay, the problem with this is that my arms got tossed places, but I look suitably asleep, I imagine. Let's see if I can crack open my eyelids without being noticed.

Oh, hi, Gaius. You look bored.

No, really, he does. He's just sitting on Robin's bed, sucking on a lollipop and glancing around slowly. Probably entertaining himself with the power of his miiiind. Or he's just really enjoying that sucker. I can't tell.

Okay, I'm getting seriously uncomfortable. Time to get up. I pull a sharp sit-up, then shift my legs to the edge of the bed, and spring up on them.

What? Sleepy? No, I'm not sleepy, gods. I just slept for twelve hours straight then feigned further sleep, you think I'm sleepy? Gods, no. I'm pretty full of nervous energy.

I hear Gaius's sexily low voice GID AMSBDNSJKDSBJNK

god DAMN it I just

_why_

_why does he sound so sexy?!_

"Morning, Sunflower."

WHY AM I SQUEEING?!

OKAY UM AWKWARDNESS YES AWKWARD I haven't officially met him sooooo I guess I should play dumb! Okay! Play dumb! That sounds good! Slow down, you can't look confused if you're jumpier than a cartload of 'roos.

That's from Dragon Quest Nine, okay?

In any case, I got assigned my nickname, cool. Sunflower, eh? Sure. Okay. Just keep looking sleepy. "I... Have I seen you around?" I let out a yawn. Shut up, I'm not sleepy, that was for theatrical purposes.

He shrugs and adjusts his lollipop. "I've seen you, but not vice-versa."

What.

There are _so_ many things wrong with that statement. "Okay, that sounds like you were spying on me." That would explain a lot, like why he's in here, and I can see someone asking him to watch me. Maybe Frederick or Robin. (Jealous boyfriend, not really, more of Frederick's Frederick.)

He throws up his hands in a surrender gesture. "Whoa, hold up, I wasn't." _Suuuuure._ He lowers his hands and returns to playing with his lollipop stick. "It's just that Bubbles asked me to check up on you every now and then."

Okay, if I'm to stay in character, I ought to be confused. Really confused. Okay. Let's go with this. "Um... What?"

He facepalms. "Aw, crap. Let's just start over." He gets up and approaches me, offering a hand. "Hi, I'm Gaius, Robin asked me to let her know when you woke up."

I shake his haaaanndndndndnsandn and I'm squeeing again CAN I JUST DATE HIM SERIOUSLY SCREW FREDERICK. Why is everyone here so attractive?! I just want to make out with this guy.

But that would be weird as all hell, so I keep acting and drop my hand back to my side. "I'm going to presume you already know my name, then. Question, why's you call me sunflower?" I'm pretty sure I already know, but I want to make sure.

Smile, shrug. "'Cause you seem sunny, but you're too short. It's a joke."

His smile is cuter than Stahl's. Seriously. And he's a friggin' candy thief. He'd get me loads and loads of candy...

And man do I have a sweet tooth...

Okay, seriously.

"Nice to know the height gags are alive and well. Now, shoo." I make a shooing motion at him, and I hope he can tell I'm just joking. "Go report to Robin."

Looking pressured, he squawks in response: "She's out shopping! Crap, but this situation sucks." You're telling me, the person you were spying on?

I fold my arms, having stopped flapping my hands at him. "I don't see how that's a problem."

He groans. "She's with Princess and Twinkles, and I'd like to avoid Twinkles if I can." Who was Twinkles again? I forget his nicknames. At least it's in character to ask for clarification.

Princess is easier than pie to suss out, so I go with the obvious guess. "Lissa and... who?" Hopefully the furrowed brow helps.

"Ugh." Gaius groans yet again, covering his face with both hands. "Maribelle."

Oh yeah, he and Maribelle had backstory. "Right. Okay. Seriously, shoo." I want my privacy back, while I'd love to make out with Gaius– gods, just _imagine_ how sweet he'd taste– I don't feel quite comfortable showing him exactly how much sexy is in my body. "I have crap to do." Like clothes to put on, weapons to practice with, art to do.

He allows himself to be gently pushed out the door. "Aw, fine. I'll just sit outside." He moves to sit, and I allow one last snark before the conversation ends.

Have I mentioned I am quite attracted to him? Hng, he has orange haaaaiiiir...

"And not share that delicious-smelling candy I know you have." Look crestfallen, Shanz, maybe he'll give you some. If hell freezes over, that is.

He instantly moves to protect his cloak. "The candy's mine, hands off." Yeah, I probably could never beat him in ninja anyways.

So, I deliver one last strike. "It's fine, I know of sweeter stuff from back home." Twizzlers. Hugs. Chocolate rocks. Laffy Taffy. Lifesavers. And those are just a few favorites...

Gaius scrambles to his feet, drool already flying from his mouth. "Huh?! Gods, Sunflower, tell me!"

I move away from him– seriously, he was at my feet– and pick up that Arcwind. "Nah, I got reading to do." I plop onto my bed and crack the tome open.

I miss Gaius's agonized groan as he steps back outside, because damn this is interesting. Inside the front cover has her name written, in calligraphy: _Noel Dinrel._ Beneath that is a note: _This book is the property of Noel Dinrel. Should it be found in any state less than pristine, woe betide the befouler._

Awww. She's got a threat to kill anyone who messes with it. Just like her mom. I look to the first drawing.

It's herself. In pen. No color. Damn, I still can't get her hair color. But she's got a face like mine, adorable, round eyes, and curly hair. She's got this hilariously oversized mage hat, too. She's grinning and playing with her cape– she's in a classic mage outfit– and in her other hand is a tome.

Lordy, this is the cutest thing I ever did see. And if I didn't make that tone silly, I'd be tearing up. I... I don't think I could be prouder.

Her art style is quite like mine, but more shoujo and chibi. As in, her eyes are slightly more exaggerated. She throws in highlights everywhere and goes quite light on the shading.

I turn the page. Here we see Lucina, in that style. Gods, it's a bit silly. At least Lucina looks more elegant... and I see Noel hasn't quite figured out poses. The anatomy is a little off, and I'm pretty sure legs can't bend like that unless they're broken, but it's a close call.

Cynthia. Huh. She... Yeah, that makes sense. Sumia died here, in this timeline, because of interference from the future, so it makes sense that she would've survived in the original. The shoujo style fits Cynthia pretty well, though.

This is quite sketchy, looks like she got frustrated like hell over this one... Morgan. He looks cute! But apparently she's not satisfied with it. Ah, I see a note: _Ask Mom how to draw boys. _Awwwww. That's so cute.

Page turn. Hey, this isn't art, it's entirely writing.

_Dad's off to Plegia to fight, Mom's with him, as always. Mom never leaves Dad's side... And she knows I want to spend more time with her. Mom promised that she'd come back okay, but we both know this is where Grima gets revived._

_'Cause this is the bad timeline, 'cause we don't have time travelers messing around._

_It's a lot like Homestuck, at least, the first half, where... Um... Okay, it's like, the alpha kids are my parents and their buddies, and the beta kids are us– Me, Lucy, Cynthia, Morgan, Owain, everyone. The "guardians" die here, we mess with time, then we and the guardians' younger selves fix everything._

_Complete with the immortal time traveling demon._

_We're gonna go back in time, I guess, but I don't know if it goes right because of our influence or due to other stuff. I don't know how much of an impact we have. I mean, we save a few people, but... I dunno._

_The whole dreamer thing really screwed stuff up. We might mess up because of too much interference. I know Mom tried to change things, and... She messed up. Mom's not as good at strategy as Robin is._

_I wish I coulda been there. But hey, I'll get that chance. We're gonna go back and fix everything. Everyone'll survive, even the old exalt, Emm._

_I guess I'd better train for that day._

And there's a doodle of her face, a smile, at the bottom of the page.

... Gods. I could cry. I'm so proud. Though it's a childish tone she writes in, not once does she wish that this had happened to someone else; she takes up the torch herself to do it. That is selflessness, that is strength.

That is my daughter.

I close the tome so as to not stain it with tears. This is my _daughter._ She may be soft and gentle, but she's a friggin' badass. She can wield arcwind and she's so young, and she came her with her mission in mind, determined to do it.

What mother would not be touched by this?

I hide the arcwind in my pockets and gently dry my tears before I head outside. I find Gaius chatting with Robin, who's carrying a crapton of stuff on her back. Dear Naga, did Maribelle and Lissa make her carry all their purchases?

The two pause their rather animated conversation upon seeing me. "Ah, Shanzira. You might want to pack up, we're leaving the palace soon."

I nod. That sounds about right. We recruit Cordelia next, yes? ... Aw, shit, she's gonna wonder where Sumia is. Um. Fuck. Stay in character, Shanz. "Where are we headed?"

Robin offloads a little bit of her stuff onto Gaius. "We're escorting the Exalt to her husband's castle in the east. It should be safer for her." Now Gaius is weighed down, too. Awww. He's so cute. I really ought to date him. I think he's better than Frederick. On the other hand, Frederick DID come up to me and ask me out, so I oughta give him another chance.

I stretch. "Whee. Back to marching." I generally make a sound of some kind to clear my mind, and it so happened to be "whee". If you see me yawn out of nowhere, there's a chance I was saying weird things to myself. As if I was narrating my life.

Robin nods. "You're going to be with the pegasus knights, since I've heard you've started taking care of Sumia's pegasus. You don't mind, do you? We need a contact with them."

Oho. Strategy. Sweet. AND I get to ride Elincia s'more. I think she's just going to be my mount from now on. Hm, perhaps I ought to get a new outfit? No, no, the coat, I love the coat too much. But maybe I could wear it over something else... Hm.

Hm? Oh, right, I owe an answer. I nod happily– Aw, wait, no, that means I'm stuck with a bunch of other women. No hot guys! Grr. At least I won't be distracted. Welp, I'm still okay with it, it makes sense. Sigh.

"Good. I'll be in the library if you need anything, I have some reading to do before we leave."

"Sure," I murmur. With that, I leave her and Gaius to suffer under their loads.

I am really bored. I ought to pack, but the thing is, I'm already pretty well packed. I don't carry a load of stuff. So I wander the palace for a bit. Makes a nice hike. Got idiot nobles chatting here and there, some of the other Shepherds wandering– hey, is that Sully dragging Welsh outside? Holy crap, it is. That looks hilar... Not going there, nope, bad idea. I am NOT suffering through one of Sully's training sessions.

Just keep walking, just keep walking. I see Eldrad and Lon'qu talking about something, then Lon'qu notices me and freezes up. I just smirk at him and keep walking. Be very afraid, heh heh.

Whoop, who'd I just bump into? Oh, boss. "Heya, bos–"

Now I see why we bumped, he's not looking where he's going either. He can't see because he's wiping his eyes. ... Really? I can't believe what I'm seeing.

... "Boss?"

He immediately cleans himself up. "Yes? Oh, Shanz. Is there anything you need?"

I have to admire that brave face he's put on. Even when something's bothering him this badly (which must be saying something, as only Emmeryn's death could make him cry before), he's still capable of controlling himself. I wish I had that toughness... Although I will admit that making me cry is damn hard.

I thought the same was true for Chrom, so what gives? "Is something wrong, Chrom?"

He lets out a ragged sigh. Wow, that one would summon Cordelia. "It's Sumia. I... I asked her to lunch before she died. She said yes, and we were supposed to have it today... Right now, actually."

Oh dear gods, what did I just stumble on? "I... don't know what to say, other than 'I'm sorry'. Do you need to be alone?"

He holds a deep breath for a moment to calm himself, then lets it out. It's notably calmer. "Being alone is... No, I could use company right now. I don't want to burden you, but..."

I quickly straighten myself and salute him. "Chrom, Boss, whichever you prefer, as a Shepherd, it's partly my job to make sure our leader's strong enough to lead. If you couldn't rely on us, that would be bad. I'd be glad to help you, if only you let me."

It is really nerve-wracking when your boss, who is a friggin' prince, is asking for such personal help, especially when he always seems too tough to shake this badly. I mean, I get that I'm the first person he happened upon while in this state, and that I was a friend of Sumia's, but it's still nervous. There are a million other things I'd rather do, but...

Well, he's my damn boss, I kinda have to comfort him, even if he shouldn't really be crying in the first place.

WOOP. AW CRAP STUCK. As in I'm glued in place because I just got a bear hug. I really want to slip out of here, I'm uncomfortable as all hell. I hear a choked and teary "thank you" after a few seconds, but I barely register it over my anxiety flipping out.

I guess it just makes me reeeaaaally nervous to see the prince in so vulnerable a state. It really affects my morale. And I guess that's what his relationship with Sumia was built on, her hiding his weaknesses to keep morale up. At least, it was like that in the Japanese version.

That's why he's feeling so much weaker! It's because his shield who managed to wrap him around her finger is dead, gone, broken. There was more to it than just love, strong as love is.

Suddenly, I don't mind that pairing so much...

I gingerly lift a hand and pat Chrom's back. I force through a smile and make it look genuine, to try and cheer him up. I'm the QUEEN of morale, I ought to be able to cheer people up. I clear out my throat quietly and begin to sing at a pianissimo (which is pp on a staff and it's really quiet):

_In vento cogitatio, spirat in vento,_

Thought blows in the wind, in the wind,

_E vacuo lux elucet, lux e vacuo,_

Light shines from the void, light from the void,

_E somno somnia cre'ta, somnia e somno,_

Dreams awaken out of sleep, dreams out of sleep,

_In clara umbra creatum versat..._

Creation twirls in a bright shadow...

Shut up, I know it's cheesy as hell, but it is amazing what the power of a good sound can do. Besides, I have pipes, I may as well put 'em to use. That's only one verse, I don't feel like singing the rest (and the third and fourth verses I'm not so confident on). If only I had something outright cheerful to sing... Well, pretty is the best I can do. Better than something depressing like the Song of Healing...

I change my mind, that would actually be very appropriate to sing. But I'm not gonna, this is enough. If I don't stop now, I'm gonna get into a warm-up and then start belting out music across the palace, then we get people annoyed at me.

I stand awkwardly like this for a while, then I poke Boss lightly. I gotta pack.

He stands up and wipes his face– awww, crap, I got tears on my coat. "Thank you, Shanz. I owe you."

Um, sure. "No, you don't. I'd be happy to do this for pretty much anyone else." Everyone but Chrom, pretty much. Gods, this is so awkward, can I just vanish?!

He nods at me and waves a hand. "You should go and pack. Robin says we're leaving tonight."

I nod in return, twist around, and get walking. Once I'm sufficiently out of sight, I sprint.

Note to self: Avoid Chrom after Emmy dies. If it's this bad at just Su...

Aw, shit. I had just stopped grieving, too. I wanna slug Chrom for dragging it back up. Know what? I'm gonna pack, and I'm gonna find something fun to do. I slow to a walk, passing by the library. I see Nin and Miriel in there, having a discussion over something, and I return my eyes to my path.

"Shanzira?"

Aw, crap. I turn around and see Robin again. "Mmhmm?" She does not need to see the tear stains on my coat.

She pants, apparently having jogged to catch up with me. "I meant to ask... Why is it you sleep so much?"

Lordy. I knew it was gonna happen, I didn't want it to. "I have no friggin' clue." Honesty wins! Right?

Robin narrows her eyes, and I swear I see a vicious glint in them. "Don't lie to me, Shanzira. You know _something_. Not everyone can sleep twelve hours a day and survive on that, it's unhealthy."

Wow, medieval people were aware that too much sleep is bad? I'm impressed!

Okay, more half-truths. "When there's something weird going on with my body, I accept and adapt to it, not ask the world all sorts of questions. I'm not Miriel." This actually was a double-edged sword back when I had depression. I hadn't had a clue that was why my digestive system was so out of whack, I just knew I had to be careful with what I ate.

Robin takes this setback and continues to press me. "I've done some reading, and–"

"Shanzira!" Frederick! Yes! Save me, Frederick! "Might I have a word?"

SAVED BY THE BOYFRIEND! I trot over to him and conceal a smile on my face. "Sure, what is it?" Must not blow raspberries at Robin. Urge conquered, great.

Frederick smiles at me, snjkfldhasjvdfsnhfdj that smile still makes me squee. Okay, fuck Gaius, sticking to Frederick, Frederick is sexy. "How are you this afternoon?" He asks. It's afternoon already?

He interrupted an interrogation just to ask that. He is so sweet. Did I mention I have the best boyfriend? Because I do. "I'm pretty good, thanks. Might I inquire of your personal well-being at this time as well?" Yeah, I figured some complicated speech would be cute.

He bows his head briefly abchsdjfhs I want to play with his hair. It's a really nice color. "I am fine, thank you." He raises out of the aforementioned nod. "I would ask, do you know of the tales of the sleepwalkers?"

Oh dear. I should've seen this coming, but I didn't because of my damned hormones. I'm about to be interrogated by him. Well, um, let's see how it goes. "No, I can't say I do." He seems to be less aggressive about it, at least, and I'd rather have that than Robin.

He straightens up for exposition mode: "Let me explain it thus: The sleepwalkers were, or are, individuals who live two separate, yet intertwined lives. You see, they possess two bodies across two difference realms. When one body slumbers, the other stirs. These individuals have appeared frequently in ancient legends, and always have they offered some sort of hidden knowledge."

"Huh. Wow." Um, excuse me while I'm stunned. There are others like us?

With those brown eyes, Frederick locks my own eyes in place. "Tell me truly: Does this not describe you, Shanzira?"

There is only a brief pause before my answer– not too quick, not too slow. "I dunno. I don't really remember my dreams when I wake up." Have I mentioned I'm good at bullshitting? Especially when said bullshitting allows me to use past truths. I am so grateful being a good storyteller also means being a good liar.

A few seconds pass as Frederick scans me for hints of falsehood, then he takes a slight sigh and appears to relax. "Very well. Shall we lunch, then?"

Yay! Back to the fluffy sweet boyfriend thing! I was waiting for that! "What are you offering?" I AM getting hungry about now.

Frederick glances up, musing of possible places, until his eyebrows lift and he answers, "I know of a chef who cooks the most divine bread and soup combination."

I can feel the drool now. "That'll hit the spot. Let's go!" Bread and soup! Hopefully meat soup! Mm! I glue myself to Frederick's arm– and he offers it for me to wrap around, of course– and we walk leisurely at first, then hasten as our mutual hunger grows.

I didn't think I'd like him this much. He's really just a big sweetie. It's a pretty day out, summer's starting, and we have butterflies flitting about, and the flowers are just at the edge of their prime. I bend over and sniff a rose, intoxicated into further elation by its sweet scent. Yet my touch is so gentle that I leave nary a scratch upon the flower itself.

Shut up, I break out the purpose prose when I'm this happy. I would ace a creative writing class while in this mood.

I love how busy it always is in this city. Everyone's happily going about their business, selling their merchandise, or baking their bread and whatnot. The smell of fresh bread and cooked chicken is what leads Frederick and I to this restaurant, and he pays for a meal for two.

I'm just gonna shut down my thoughts and enjoy the bliss...

* * *

Dismal reality. Well, anything's dismal next to the joy of that little date. It's the simple things. Ah well. I've got my stuff packed, some of it's in the convoy, some I've got stuffed into Elincia's saddlebags. Sketchbooks– both mine and Noel's– a pair of tomes, and a spear. Oh, yeah, and food. I won't be hungry for a while after that lunch, though, it was so good. I could taste the calories... Kidding.

I trot over to Emmeryn– that's where I am, silly, with the pegasus knights. It's almost sunset, we're about to leave. Anyways, I trot to Emm, leading Elincia, figuring I could chat with her. I smile and walk up. Ooh... Hey, that's odd. "Hey, Emmy. Is that a new robe?"

Emmeryn turns and sees me, then smiles. "Why, yes, it is. It is said to be better protection from misfortune, and upon letting my guards examine it, they claim that to be true."

There are a load of talismans sewn into that robe. It also looks pretty damn thick. Well, I guess it beats normal armor.

"Where'd you get it?" I could use a robe like that. I mean, yeah, I love this coat and all, but something that would better protect me in battle would help. Besides, it won't help Emm much, she doesn't even fight after this.

"A young woman in a green robe and mask offered it to me." What. "I did not feel inclined to trust her until she shed her mask and claimed to know the future, as Marth does."

Nodnodnod. "She does. She was with Marth on the evening you were supposed to be assassinated. She helped save Chrom's life, and certain helped with saving you." But why? I seriously doubt a crapton of talismans is going to save Emmeryn from that fall. Unless she has something else in mind? Argh. I can't predict that girl, she's crazier than I am.

Emm smiles and lays a hand on her new robe. "Then I am all the more glad I accepted her offer. Truly, I am honored to have her support."

Wait.

It just hit me– Noel shed her mask for Emm? Then Emm knows her hair color. "Say, Emmeryn, you saw her face under the mask, right? You said so."

Her eyebrows quirk in curiosity and she tilts her head. "Why, yes, I did, but I am sworn to keep secret her identity."

"That's not what I'm asking for. I just want to know what color hair she has."

"Red."

... Of course. My hair color. Wonderful.

* * *

**Why red? 1. To screw with fan theories. 2. Red is an awesome hair color. 3. If this was official, Noel appears before her father is decided, so her hair color would be likewise undecided. What's the go-to in that situation? Mother's color.**

**Mostly 2 and 3, though.**

**Oh yeah, here's your speculation topic of the update: Who do you guys think the other dreamers will marry and why?**


	20. Ease and Anxiety

**Author's notes: This update war would go much faster if G2G would get his goddamn muse together. Seriously, he's having PoV issues with the next chapter, so he's like "eh I'll just work on someone else's PoV for now." EVERYONE GO TELL HIM TO GET HIS SHIT TOGETHER. GO NOW, MY MINIONS I MEAN FANS, AND LET FURTHER AWESOME BE SPREAD BY MY FELLOW FANFIC AUTHOR.**

**At any rate, victory number two is to me, effortlessly. I'm disappointed with this.**

**Stuff happens in this chapter, with music suggested as it goes along. Shanz pulls out her iPod at one point, that's how.**

* * *

So, in order to not leave the Shepherds behind in a hell of a dust wake, Emm's PK's are walking. We are sitting on our pegasi and walkin' 'em. The Shepherds are leading the way, which is smart, considering that they'll be a good vanguard for when those Plegians come after on. On the other hand, we'll be fucked when those reinforcements turn up. That is, there ARE wyvern rider reinforcements, right? I dunno.

Me? I've been laughing my ass off. You'd think the PK's would be boring and strict, but apart from Phila, they're hardly as virtuous as I am. I mean, I've been giggling with a few of them who've been cracking innuendos. It's almost like hanging out with Nin. We have the _best_ innuendo sprees, it's why we call her _Nin_nuendo.

Aw, man, I meant to have one of those with her, and she's with the Shepherds, even though she rides a pegasus as well. God damn it. I guess it'll wait until a support conversation? I dunno. I just want to jump into battle and get it over with so I can stop having itchy trigger arms.

I'm not kidding, I keep twisting around as if to throw a javelin. Some of the knights call me Twitchy for it. Some of them even crack shipping jokes– Frederick the Wary and Shanzira the Twitchy. Heh, I guess we are a good match, after all.

And there's yet another reason I wanna go back to the Shepherds, I kinda have a boyfriend there to hang out with. Frederick and Elincia (the pegasus) are the same– really sweet once you get to know 'em. Well, yeah, Frederick is notably bad at social things, but I'm remotely good at them if I'm not distracted with, say, a 3DS.

Director, sir, I'm looking at you; stop swiping the thing. Tactics are handy to know.

"So Twitchy!" Ah, that's one of the PK's talking to me. Short, pink hair, I don't know what her name is, but I'm calling her Marcia. "Aren'tcha one of those kiddie types? Like, you really like to have fun and all that?"

I tilt my head and consider this briefly. "Yeah, you can say that. I try to stay sunny."

She leans forward on her pegasus, resting her chin on interlaced fingers and frowning. "So howzit that a widdle girlie like you managed to attract the hottest of hotties, Frederick the Wary? He always refused me."

Nickname revoked, she doesn't act like Marcia at all. More like those idiots who were actually shorter than me in high school and did nothing but gossip all class.

I draw myself up, sitting with the best damn posture I can manage. "Because, unlike some, I am capable of not merely class, but such a radiant beauty that I shine joy upon most I encounter." Yes, I was going for "condescension" there. I would make a _great_ Condesce. How am I gonna get a 2x3dent?

She sits up as well, a snarl evident on her face. "Fine, be a bitch." She trots off to some other part of the line.

Aaaaand I just fucked my reputation. Where are all the fucks I give? Oh yeah, I lost 'em all back in middle school, when I learned not to care. Argh, I need a morale boost. Maybe I can combine my frizzmess of a hairstyle with my hood to hide earbuds? Glance, glance, everyone seems busy. OKAY! Music it is. I untie the ribbon in my hair– the tie broke a while back, sadly– and comb it out with my fingers, sweeping it to the front. I then pull my hood over my head.

It might be June now, but it's actually chilly. Must be a cold front. That, or I'm waaaaay to accustomed to California's heat. (It's not like I leave the state much.) Could also be both. Okay, where's my iPod... Got a good amount of juice, sweet. What should I play? Something calm. Something that reminds me of my sweet, sweet boyfriend. I keep thinking Homestuck, but what else can I do? Hm, Blazblue has "Pinky Promise" and "Stardust Memory"... Ooh, "Affectionate Moment" from Radiant Historia's not bad. Yeah, I've been overdosing on Homestuck and Blazblue lately, time for some RH. I can even whistle to it...

"Soldier! No need for the noise." God damn it, Phila, I'm not one of your mooks. Argh. With great reluctance, I cease whistling, and instead enjoy my "favorites" playlist in peace.

Woman's annoyingly strict. The gossiping PKs have to do so in whispers, because otherwise Phila would descend upon them like Grima in the bad timeline. (That was a bad one, don't ever make it again.) But it is still damn tempting to start belting stuff out. I could just ignore my iPod altogether and sing something I learned back in Choir (the stuff I've picked up at my college isn't too fitting).

You know what? I'm going to go up by the only shield from Phila's strictness, and that is Emmeryn. The two make a perfect Tanith/Sigrun pair. Or would Emm be Sanaki? I should stop drawing parallels where there are none.

"Yello, Your Grace," I greet calmly. When did I learn this titles and address crap? Oh, yeah, back when I first joined the Twilight Knights. That was great warm-up training for this.

Emmeryn nods her head to me, having drawn her gaze to me when I trotted up. "A pleasure to see you well, Lady Shanzira. How fare the pegasus knights?"

Hang on a sec, I gotta find the words.

"Scared of Phila, as always." Yep, that's perfect.

The Exalt chuckles. "I have told her to let them relax every now and then, but now I fear it is a disservice to let them relax when she is liable to swoop in at any minute."

And then Phila screeches–

"WHAT WAS THAT, SOLD– Oh, Y-Your Grace! M-my apologies! I... I thought you were–"

... Perfect. Gods, that was great.

Emmeryn waves a hand at me, letting me know it's okay to laugh. GOOD. I'm laughing so hard after this that I miss Emm's reaction, but that was just SO WONDERFUL. Phila yelled at her own boss, haaahahaha...

I quiet down to hear Phila soldiering on with her apology and digging herself further into a hole– "–sounded as though one of my own women was whispering behind my back, and I must admit that of late they have been difficult to wrangle–"

"Phila, stop digging," I giggle. "If they don't respect you, they'll learn it after a few hundred exercise runs." When you do ten push-ups every time you fuck up, you tend to respect your boss. Works in the Twilight Knights. Admittedly, I've never actually seen the guy fight, but he has a pretty tight grip on command. It did not take me long to start calling him "Sir".

I do believe a shudder just ran through the PK's. SUCKERS! I'm not one of them! I'm a Shepherd! HA!

FWOOM!

Okay, a white and red blur just rushed past me, and gods it was going fast. "FUCK!" is the first thing I blurt (pure reaction, okay?) and I lock my knees into Elincia and grip the reins so as to not fall off. Of course, Elincia starts to charge forward, so I'm careful to loosen my grip on her sides and pull the reins back. "What the hell was that?!"

Phila squints. "Cordelia! But she was assigned to the border..." Oh boy, the fight's started AND I'M LATE FOR IT?! "Oh, gods, could it be–?!"

I roll my neck around really quickly and dig my heels in. Elincia rears, and while she's doing so– gods this is epic– "I gotta go ahead! Sorry, but my gut's–" Elincia lands here– "telling me something's up!"

FWOOP, FWOOP, FWOOP...

Yep, that's the Shepherds engaged with a squad of wyvern riders and their ensemble. The guys on land look like they're damn pathetic, perhaps stable hands for the...

... For the apparently fire-breathing lizards. Oh, right, didn't Eldrad mention that? FUCK. Wait, wait, I can handle this, I can do shit, what am I shitting myself for? I'm starting to take a leaf from his book. I'm Shanzira fuckin' Dinrel, and I'm not some sort of wimp who loses it every time something goes wrong.

Nah, instead I pull out the Arcthunder and bolt a guy. Damn it, I need a wind tome. NOEL! Argh, I'm going to give her a Gibb slap the next time I see her. Wait, wait, feathers, that's Cordy, she may or MAY NOT BE ABOUT TO GET IMPALED OH YEAH EAT LEAD I MEAN LIGHTNING!

And the wyvern plummets, his rider with him. YES! These guys are actually pretty easy to kill– hit a wyvern in the wing and it sinks, and if its rider is still somehow alive, one of the Shepherds below will finish him off.

This is The Beginning of Something Really Excellent, here.

Okay, let's scatter a few sparks here and there, and I'm going to shoot a few weaker bolts so that the wyverns underestimate me. I... I don't know how to transcribe the sound, perhaps I ought to try "bzzt" and go from there.

Fuck it, let's just go with the music.

Zap!

"ARE YOU OKAY?!" Oh, Cordelia's yelling at me. I glance to her– oh gods, she was trying to get my attention and my span farted because I had the earbuds in. GODS DAMN IT. I hate it when that happens. I rein Elincia in and inhale to answer.

"YEP! ARE YOU HURT?" Doesn't look like it, I see no blood.

She shakes her head, a gesture practically impossible to miss with that hair of hers. I swear to Naga, if I were bisexual or lesbian, I would've fallen for Cordelia on the spot. Or if I was a straight guy, that too. I mean, that fucking hair, it's just... hng. I once dreamed of having hair just like that.

"I NEED TO GET A MESSAGE TO CAPTAIN CHROM, BUT–"

I interrupt her with my awes– I mean, my promptness– "I'LL KEEP THE SKIES CLEAR FOR YA!"

She waves at me and flies off. "THANK YOU!"

"Right." I twist my torso around and switch from tome to javelin. Two riders coming at me, I know how to handle this. I throw the javelin at the nearer one, then crack open the tome as fast as I can and bolt the far one.

Now one's sinking, and the other's wounded. Woo! If only I can get a javelin through that wyvern's wing. ... Not worth the waste. I raise my lance– yes, I graduated to lances, I _am_ cavalry now– and dash forth to joust with the sucker.

What's my score again? It just increased by one. Gimme a sec to count, umm... Yeah, Shanz 6, Plegians 0. Woo! So a running attack wasn't suicidal this one time, let's not push my luck again. Okay, where are the other wyvern riders– Oh, hey, Phila's jumped in. About time, she's late.

I'm in a battle for my life and that of the exalt, and I'm making a damn game of how many kills I'm getting. Good lord, my sanity really is going. At least I'm not pulling an Eldrad and losing bets with the tactician over it.

I should tease him about that later.

... There goes the rest of the flying cavalry, taking control of the skies. I'm going to get orders from Robin. "HEY, SQUISHY!"

She twists around upon hearing my voice, then stares at my glory– okay, no, she's probably wondering why the fuck I'm here. "SHANZIRA?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!" Yup, I was right.

I sharply nod my head in Cordelia's direction, descend closer so she can friggin' hear me, and answer more quietly. "She and I are your reinforcements!" Of course I'm still yelling, did you think the word "quietly" implied a whisper or something? Nah.

Robin looks around hastily, her silvery hair flying places (By the way, it's actually a really really light blonde! I've had a good look at it. I've also see blonde hair that light, too. Oh, yeah back on topic) until she sees Cordelia. "Oh." Aaaand Cordelia's just hovering by Chrom, too red in the face to say anything because holy shit she's so close to him.

I was there, once, love; I know how you feel. But now I'm actually dating the guy I like, maybe you'll have a shot, too. ... Or not, as this seems to follow the game's damn skeleton. Agh, if only my 3DS still had power, I could check if that ship is plausible. Oh yeah, I just remembered, my iPhone works. I ought play with it after this battle.

"ROBIN! WE HAVE ENEMY REINFORCEMENTS COMING FROM THE REAR!"

That was Chrom, gods his voice is loud. Yep, tenors are stronger than sopranos, loathe though I am to admit it. Argh. I glance back to Robin, as Chrom's already dived back into the fray. "Shanzira, did you catch that?"

Oh? The ninja just got ninja'd. Welp. "Sure did, want me to handle 'em?"

She tossed her head in Cordelia's direction. "Work with her to take them down! Go!"

I salute her, posture straight as ever. "Yes, ma'am!" Aaaaand I turn Elincia around. Turning a pegasus around is much easier than turning a horse around, it's great. Wings are _so_ much better than legs. "I never did catch your name!" At least, I shouldn't have. Staying in character!

"It's C–Cordelia." She's still red from her Chrom encounter, whoops. "And yours, milady?"

I give her a salute, but a sunnier one than the one I just gave our tactician. "Shanzira! Robin gave us orders to go and roast some reinforcements, let's get going and clear 'em out!" Heels, meet Elincia! Let's GO GO GO!

Nobody will even get that reference, it's pretty old and rather minor. Well, some SSB junkies might get it, to which I say, I AM ONE OF YOU!

Hello, Phila! We're reinforcing _you_ now! Coolio! I send a few bolts, gathering the sparks I set about here earlier.

Magic is so OP in this world, it's wonderful. And I have a damn good grasp of how it works. At any rate, the lot of us take out the wyvern riders in minutes, then 'Delia and I return to the Shepherds, who... have wiped out the rest of the Plegians. Damn. I land to let Elincia rest her wings, and the moment I drop from her back, she plops onto her belly.

Aw crap, how tired IS she? I vaguely hear Cordelia warning Chrom rather tearfully about reinforcements while I squat by Elincia. While I'm at it, I stop the music coming from my iPod (right in the middle of one of the orchestral pieces from the release of Skyward Sword! Awww...) and hide the earbuds. Pegasus, okay.

"You tired, girl? Or didja get hurt? You plopped down so quick ya might've been hurt..." I run my fingers through her mane– holy Naga pegasus hair is soft– to try and relax her. She's panting heavily, but it isn't labored... I glance around. Well, she didn't take any arrows, axes, or javelins... I see no blood rolling down her flanks. I gingerly touch each of her legs, and I'm relieved to find she doesn't cringe or try to bite at me.

"Phew. So you're just tired, sweetie?" She snorts and nods. I give her this affronted look. "Hey, you're the one being a drama queen, and not all injuries draw blood. How would I know that you were just tired?"

"Oh, gods, Cordelia, please tell me the border hasn't fallen!"

THIS IS TOO PERFECT, 'SCUSE ME, ELINCIA. "No, she just happened to notice Plegian soldiers being warped her via magic aaaaalll the way from the border, and managed to make it here in time." Heeeeere's your sign. Good god, Phila, did someone pass you the idiot ball?

See, Elincia whinnied in amusement, she agrees. I pat her neck. "Good girl."

Emmeryn facepalms, but it's not her voice I hear. "Shanzira, control yourself." Ouch, that tone was almost biting. And it came from Chrom. Eep, at least let me justify myself.

"Stupid questions deserve stupid answers," I shrug. "Gotta keep my wit sharp somehow. Phila, how'd the pegasus knights do?"

She maintains an even tone, though it quavers slightly. "We have taken a few casualties, but we can still fly and fight." Oh... Yeah, she just lost quite a few of her mooks, didn't she? Okay, putting distance between myself and Phila for a while. Wait a minute, shouldn't Robin be here to give this report? Huh.

My eyes greet the ground, as I've interlaced my fingers behind my back and raised my arms as far up as I can (Yeah, I'm flexible). "Welp, I'm off to have a break and see if everyone's alive," since Robin is apparently too distracted with something to give such a report. Actually, if she's distracted, then perhaps someone did die. Oh, gods, please, don't let it have been a dreamer... Better, please have let everyone survive this fight...

Oh, dear gods. _That's_ what's distracting Robin. I run to her. What got my attention was the fact that her normally silvery-blonde hair is _red with blood._

Red with _her_ blood.

"Oh, gods, Robin?!" I immediately support her so as to forestall her collapse. Just in the nick of time. I wrap one of her arms around my torso– Okay, maybe not! There's an arrow in her ribs. Just how badly did she get the crap beat out of her?! "You look like you've been turned into a pincushion!"

Her eyes are half–closed with exhaustion. "Shanz...ira... I nearly did... Augh. Help..."

Inhale. Secure open pathway through windpipes. Belt: "SOMEONE GET A HEALER!" I narrow my windpipes a little and address Robin again. "I think I know someone who can fix you up, if I can just reach her. Just stay awake, because if you die, so help me I will piss on your grave." I wouldn't teabag, if that's what you're asking.

She ekes out a weak chuckle, which is a good sign. She has enough life to laugh. "Thank you..."

My frizzmess flies everywhere as I shake my head. "You're my damn friend; if I didn't care about your life, you'd have the right to boot me from the Shepherds." We have, like, a B support by now. Robin's my godsdamn friend, not a handy plot device.

She continues trying to talk to me instead of saving her breath. "We probably wouldn't... do that anyways... Your knowledge is useful..."

"Yeah, sure," I murmur. There, she's still there, talking to Chrom! "EMMERYN!"

Her Grace immediately runs to me, then looks back at Chrom. "Oh dear Naga! Chrom, is this not your tactician?"

At the sight of this, the boss nearly throws up the soles of his boots. "ROBIN?!" I don't want to look at his face, having never been that terrified in my life. I always have full confidence that people will live, since I believe in real-life plot armor.

What? My mom has it. (That's another story, and it's damn long, so another time.)

I look to Emmeryn. "To answer your question, your Grace, yes, this is his tactician."

I feel Robin try to shift herself on my back; at the same time, I feel something warm and wet touch the skin on my back. Aaaand now my shirt's ruined. Robin chokes out one word: "Help..."

I look back to Emm. "I have no clue what happened to her, but she needs help NOW." Judging from the nerve endings on my back, Robin's about to die of exsanguination.

There's a gleam of bright light, and Robin takes a rasping breath and then the weight on my back increases. Or rather, Robin fainted, so she couldn't support herself. "Ugh!" I snap my knees straight again to hold her up. Muscles hurt too much to squat. And I remember when my strength wasn't enough to carry someone... "Am I to assume my orders are to find the nearest healing tent?"

"No," I hear Chrom say, then the weight vanishes from my back and shoulders, letting me straighten out and breath deeply again. I take a gasp in. "I'll take care of her. And Shanzira?" He carefully shifts Robin in his arms– oh my god this is so squeeworthy– "I'd like to talk to you later."

Oh gods, that was a foreboding tone. That's the sort of tone a parent uses when they're calling their kid over to chew him or her out. Great way to kill my squee.

Nonetheless, I bow at the waist. "Yes, sir." I straighten out. "I'll take my leave." About-face; ready, march. One, two, one, two...

It's easier if I just imagine it's COD. It's so much easier... I'm going to be roasted later. Where did I leave Elincia? Ah, there she is. Thank god pegasi are so big, otherwise I'd have a job finding her. I pet her and lead her along so I can give her some serious care; she's damn right to be exhausted.

... I didn't notice until now, thanks to my pathetic nose, but horses really do stink. That applies to pegasi. "You're gonna need a bath, love." She nickers at me impatiently. "Yeah, yeah, as soon as I find a body of water for it." We continue walking in a dreading silence.

"Hey, Shanz," I turn to see the usual sable-garbed Welsh, "did you see Robin?"

I carefully measure out a sigh, though it still staggers on its way out. "I just hauled her to Emm to get her healed. Why?"

He folds his arms and looks down, thinking. "Do you think she's gonna die?" And his eyes– but not his head– look up to see my face.

"Nope."

I did mean to say it so humorously, but if I don't crack friggin' jokes at this, I'll break down crying out of fear that she will die. I might have an anxiety attack if I'm not careful– shit.

"But wouldn't that be kinda cool–" what– "to see what would happen if–"

"Shut the fuck up or I'm gonna bolt you." I look Welsh dead in the eyes, working hard to conceal the sobbing shake to my breaths. I give him the most serious stare I can muster... It isn't hard, all I have to do is keep calm.

Hey, I said it wasn't hard, and I'm not about to become a liar.

Welsh raises his hands in a gesture of surrender. "Well, okay, I get that it would suck if she died. But still."

I pull another Cordelia-esque sigh. "What is it with my friends and their love of morbid humor?" The best way I can describe my face is that cold, soulless look Mu-12 has in her Continuum Shift character art. ... I think I just found out why my future daughter is named Noel.

Welsh shrugs and forces a smile (Yeah, I can tell the difference between real and forced). "I dunno, there's just something about it that kills us."

I feel my temper rise another notch. "Remind me why you criticize my puns?" A little bit of anger colors my previous soulless expression.

He folds his arms. "Mine are _better!_ Besides, that one was literal _and_ figurabive!"

Alter stare slightly. Let's turn it into the kind of stare where I ask what the fuck is wrong with him. "Figurabive."

He stumbles around an "uhh" for a moment while I hold my face. "Figuraliviltil... Whatever the word is."

There are no words for my disappointment. "Figurative, Welsh." Of course I'm the resident autocorrect. Why would the universe allow for any different? "Now if you're done being stupid, I have to wash fell blood off my coat. Excuse me." I walk past him, still leading Elincia, and I'm careful to rub a bit of blood onto him.

"Fine, be like that!"

God damn it, Welsh. You're pathetic at this. At least I understood that you were trying to cheer me up, but gods, your methods are awful.

Oh, excuse me for being a bitch. It's just I get mad sometimes, you know? As a human, I do that. I'm not fucking perfect, you know.

"Shanzira?"

Oh, oh. That wonderful, commanding tone. That wasn't sarcasm, by the way. I'm legitimately relieved to hear his voice. "That's not your blood on your coat, is it?" Frederick steps closer and looks me over. "You don't appear wounded."

Finally. I can relax and vent. "I'm fine, it's someone else's... Love," I need to satisfy my concerns quickly, before I have an anxiety attack, "other than Robin– and she should be fine– did we take any casualties?"

Frederick lets out a calm sigh, likely relieved as I am. "We did not. There are no injuries to severe to heal."

I collapse against him in relief; he catches me effortlessly. "Thank the gods... I nearly had a heart attack when I saw Robin like that." Can my heart stop pounding now? Please?

I feel a warm glove rest on my back. "I didn't realize you cared for her so much."

If I were in a fouler mood, I'd smack you for being so dense. "We share a tent. Hard not to get close to a tent-mate. At any rate, she makes a damn good friend and she's just as loyal as I am, which (if I may say so myself) is saying something." There's a story that goes with it, but it's not mine to tell. Not telling it unless the owner of it gives permission; it's a little embarrassing, but not to me. That's all I'm saying.

This gives Frederick pause for a moment. "I find her loyalty to be dubious, at best. There are certain qualities I find myself questioning."

"Such as...?"

"Total and complete lack of background," he begins, and I start to glare at him, "and she did become very close to milord very quickly, almost suspiciously so. There are also other, subtler signs, but I needn't worry you with the list."

Good god, Frederick can be annoying. I face up to his stoic face– as though he thinks he can cast doubt on a comrade and not be stared at for such a serious accusation!– and say, "she's damn loyal, and if you ask me a random passing kitten is more likely to stab Chrom in the back than her. She's also the most cunning tactician I've encountered or even heard of, which is quite amazing, as I bend my ears closely to legends. If she dies, you'll be the more grieved because we won't have her guidance." Gods know we need Grima's own hand to architect his fall.

... Perhaps that was a bit more sinister than I'd intended. Scraping thought from mind. Thought scraped. Okay.

There's a silence; neither of us has anything to say.

I hear a voice which nearly makes me jump. "Shanzira, I need to talk to you." It's Chrom, it's just Chrom, but I'm not looking forward to being chewed out for whatever he's chewing me out for.

I sigh and pat Frederick's shoulder, then stop leaning on him. "Seeya, love." I give him one last look as Chrom drags me away... Let's face it, I've grown fond of seeing his face. His eyes seem a little wide, though, as though he's... scared?

I look back at Chrom; shit may be about to hit the fan. "What did I do now?"

He stops walking and releases my wrist. "Why did you take Sumia's pegasus?" He turns to face me now, as though trying to read my face. I briefly mirror his confusion before responding.

It's not that complicated, really. "Someone needs to look after her, someone she's used to. Otherwise it's kicks to the face every other minute." I'm not kidding, if she's not used to you and you try to go near her... Well, Eldrad learned his lesson after walking away with a horseshoe mark.

"You renamed it like it belongs to you." Ooh, this is rather telling. For one, he said "it" instead of "she", so he doesn't place much value on the pegasus itself. It's something else he means to get at. Also, he stressed "belongs", to mean that she's not mine. To which I respond thus:

"Sumia's not around to own much, sadly, so her pegasus might as well belong to someone else, preferably someone who has a bloody clue of how to care for her." I read nonfiction on horses when I was a kid, okay? I know _some_ of this. "As for the naming bit, I thought it was more than a little pretentious for me to ride a pegasus called "Caeda"." Because the name of Crimea's most badass ruler isn't pretentious at all, nope. Look, it's the meaning I'm paying attention to here. Sumia's the love interest, I'm just a badass. Who's the most badass pegasus knight I know? Crimea's queen Elincia. Makes Est, Catria, and Farina shit themselves. (Farina's a great brick wall with the Delphi shield.)

"But," I force myself to look Chrom straight in the eye, and I can't believe what I'm hearing out of him, "why?! Do you think you can just replace Sumia like that, by taking her pegasus?!"

The quivering tone forces a cringe on me. "Is that what this is about?" oh shit nononono I am NOT having that anxiety attack!

Chrom takes a deep breath before soldiering on: "I loved her, she died, but you seem to think that she can just be replaced. I know you like to take up the slack where you can, but this goes too far!"

Okay, Shanz, I don't care what kind of shit you feel like; you need to hold fast. "Replacing her is not my intent, nor did that thought ever cross my mind. You're letting your grief blind you."

Oops.

Pushing the blame onto him probably wasn't the best idea, and I did it anyways. I really need to think before I speak...

"I am not!" ... Was that... Yeah, that was. That was a sob, just barely concealed with his voice, which has been raised a few pitches due to grief. "Go, leave me." He looks to the side, and it occurs to me that such remarks sting more when they ring of truth. "I don't want to see you again."

I'm about to take a serious risk, but it needs to be done.

"A few words of wisdom, since I figure some insolence couldn't possibly dig me any deeper," I begin. Okay, one deep breath to compose your thoughts, and go. "Sticking to this is only going to hurt you and everyone around you. Get over it." Why does that always have to come out so baldly? Then again, if it didn't, it would hardly have a meaning. "Sumia won't be the only loss you suffer in your life, and if this is how you react every time, it'll twist you." He's going to kill me when Emm dies, because I just foreshadowed it. "You've got two good legs." Here I take a pause to properly emphasize that. "Stand on them and walk forward. Seems more in keeping with your personality to me."

"Shanzira, leave before I do something I'll regret."

My dad's snarling rage has been topped. I scrunch into a little tiny blob of Shanzira, shake out "Y-yes, sir," and gingerly step away.

I round a corner and Frederick catches me just as my long-stalled anxiety attack kicks in. His presence is no comfort to the extremity of my fright.

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**I had comments back when I did the pre-fic author's notes, then they went kapoofle during proofreading. Um, it's late? I'm doodling? I'm so friggin' scared of characters being out of character that I had G2G read through a bit of script? Yeah. Um. In this chapter I point out subtleties, and um other little surprises! Yeah. Slowly teaching people to be more active readers and how to read between the lines. Woo! Homestuck managed it, why not me? :3?**

**Oh, yeah, I should tell you guys: From August 10th to the 24th, I'm on vacation in the southern US. As in Florida and Louisiana. I get to go to Disneyworld for two days! YES! As for writing, there will be no updates in that time, but on the other hand, I get a whole friggin' fortnight to plan! MAYBE I'LL ACTUALLY DO STUFF FOR THAT SEQUEL TO FBS.**

**As always, thanks for stickin' with me (TV TROPES PAGE YES) and reading! Stay tuned, hopefully the next chapter won't be far off (if G2G gets his shit together).**


	21. Deadening Silence

**Author's notes: I had difficulties doing the script for this one, so I just said "screw it" and wrote it without a script. If it sucks, please let me know...**

**Anyways, almost 80 followers, and at this point it's hard to describe how much I love you guys. Admittedly, the initial shock's worn off, but I still love seeing that people love my stuff. I've even seen an allusion to this fic in someone else's SI, which made me squee.**

**In this chapter I introduce some people, I throw in light gags, then the real fun begins.**

* * *

Oh gods, I hate mornings. Well, I'm grateful to be away from my boss for the moment, but damn it I just want to sleep, screw job hunting.

I'm still trying to work out the logic behind what all he said. I'm afraid I only remember the gist– he's grieving over Sumia and he thinks I'm trying to replace her? Um... Well, I am a pegasus knight now (NOT one of Phila's mooks! SUCKERS) but that doesn't mean I'm Sumia 2.0.

I thought he was normally more fond of his friends. I mean, what the hell? He never exploded at anyone else, I actually don't remember a scene in which that happens. Closest to that is right after Emmeryn dies, and he's screaming at Plegians, not his own buddies.

Wait. At the end, didn't he say something like "leave before I do something I'll regret?" THAT would be his consideration for his friends kicking in. Huh. And he didn't actually explode at me, he just growled... which is honestly scarier. Right. Habit of exaggeration. God damn it. Okay, where was I? Oh, yeah, analyzing Chrom's temper.

Well, he is like his dad, whether he likes it or not. Case closed.

Aaaand mom wants me to make cinnamon rolls. As in I hear her knocking at my door and asking. Uuuup we get... And I should change out of my bedclothes.

My mom's half an inch shorter than me, but overweight. She complains about both attributes; I don't really mind as being short is awesome and she's really squishy like this. I don't know anyone I love to hug more. Her hair's straight (somehow) and she's being dying it red for months to hide grays. She's the best mom ever, I don't care what anyone else says. She has a sense of humor like I do.

This is my average morning– sleep in until 10, get up and eat breakfast, then get on the computer and screw around, which either consists of work or goofing off. Gotta finish playing FE4, Eldrad recommended it to me like a year ago or so– wait, no, it was two years ago– and I've been floundering around helplessly since.

I pass by Nin in the hall to the kitchen. "Hey," I yawn. Okay, more exposition (as if I didn't just reel off enough). Nin likes staying at my place better than staying at her mom's, so we let her live here during the summers as long as she has a job and helps out around the house.

Not having to do dishes is wonderful.

"Good morning," she yawns back. She's been a bit cranky because the whole dreamer shtick has screwed over her sleep schedule royally– which is to say, it's remotely normal now. Meanwhile, Eldrad's complained via Skype that he's not awake until ten his time, thus screwing over his education. Sucker lives in Canada. Why doesn't he just move, if borders are of little matter to him?

Oh, wait, did I explain that I'm at my parents' house? Whoops, there's how sleepy I am. Well, it's probably easy to suss out from what I've mentioned, but yeah. School year ended, got kicked out of my dorm, now I'm back at home, and Nin's with me. I am not really a morning person, this is why I nearly kill people when they wake me. That night we were attacked at the barracks was a fucking nightmare, particularly because Frederick woke me up and we weren't a thing yet.

Then again, if Frederick woke me up as is, I'd still freak. Right now because that'd mean dealing with Chrom. Shudder. Words cannot describe how grateful I am for this respite.

Ah, the kitchen. Parents have been meaning to replace the floor, which I honestly don't know how to describe. It's supposed to imitate tile, but it's like some kind of plastic rug stuck to every corner. It's peeling off in places. As the the walls, they're painted this light grayish blue, it's pretty boring. (The living room's got orange walls and a blue ceiling, as least that's not boring.) Okay, grab a thingy... it's not really a can, I don't know what to call it. But it's a thingy of cinnamon rolls, I just need that circular pan, spray with nonstick spray, and lay out the rolls.

"Good morning!" Oh, hey, dad.

A few years back I would've considered the dreaming thing to be a respite from _him_, but he's mellowed out lately, probably because I'm actually friggin' applying myself at school. Oh, yeah. He's sort of tall– well, for my standards. He's actually average height for a guy. He's not lanky or stocky, he's in between, with a receding hairline that has to be dyed brown every few months or so. Right now he's got a laptop in his hands, the light from which is gleaming off his glasses. He makes his way across the kitchen and sits at the dining table, the chair closest to the fridge.

"Mornin'," is my response, and I... Not going to bother restating it. I get the oven to start heating up, then I sit on a little chair (long story short, dad made a table and four chairs out of wood for my siblings and I when we were kids; the chairs have since made excellent stools) to wait. I know a tall person would complain at this, because of having to live in one's knees, but for me, a kiddie chair is just fine.

I love being short, I wish my mom could see the benefits.

"You sound sleepy," Dad says. Well, jeez, I've only been back for two days, and you haven't noticed that I like to sleep? Also, it would seem he hasn't noticed my FUBARed sleep schedule yet, thank Naga. Oh, wait, wrong god. Thank god. Okay.

It's like switching between English and le Français, switching between god names to use, except it's a much tinier detail and ridiculously easy to forget.

"I am sleepy," I yawn in response. "Mornings and I aren't friendly."

He shrugs and keeps typing on his laptop (he hasn't looked at me the whole time, that's normal for him). "Well, eat something and that'll change."

He has a tendency to direct me subtly. That's worded as a suggestion, but at the same time, if I complain of hunger later (even if I do eat) he'll start to get annoyed. It'd go down like this: "I'm hungry." "I told you to eat." "I did, I'm still hungry." "Well, that's not my problem."

I have to walk on eggshells with this man, I was sooooo glad to live in a dorm.

Oven beeps. I get up, don a single oven mitt (I can't find the other ones, we lose stuff in this house. It's a mess) and carefully place the rolls in the oven. Let's set the timer, okay okay, yeah yeah, okay. Go. I have twelve minutes to burn, maybe I can play on my DS.

"You seem down," Dad comments. Holy shit, how'd he notice? He hasn't been looking over here, and it's easily hidden behind morning sleepiness. "You just got out of school, normally you're excited."

Ahhh, I get it. It's because I'm not bouncing off the walls. "Well..." I gotta figure out how to say this. Half-truths time! "A friend of mine lost a loved one, he's taking it out on me." Nin walks in right about here and makes an O with her mouth.

Dad shrugs and moves the mouse via mousepad. "Not much I can say. You can try to avoid him."

Well, he's sort of my boss and sometimes he seeks me out. But I'll give it a shot. "It's worked in the past... I'll do that, then." I crack open my 3DS.

Nin sits on the chair/stool next to me and whispers (can't be too loud, with my dad in the room). "What happened?"

Turns out I had Pokemon Mystery Dungeon in here. Well, sure, I don't really feel like playing Awakening. Okay, okay... What was my team here like– Oh yeah this was a new playthrough. "Chrom growled at me because he thinks I'm trying to replace Sumia."

"I don't really see the problem... Unless–"

Let's go to... Craggy coast to grind. Yeah. "He had a crush on Sumia." And then I only had a few enemies to deal with, way to go, me. You go to grind at a place that offers little experience.

Nin's quiet; I think she just covered her mouth with her hands. "Oh god. You're not going after him, are you?"

Flop. I stare at Nin, my 3DS now closed. "I'm dating Frederick, and I'm not doing it for the benefits. Have you ever known me to be that much of a bitch?" She's making the sort of face which hints that she wishes she hadn't said that.

"Sorry," she murmurs. "And you're not a bitch, anyways." After a few more seconds of silence, I reopen my 3DS and resume my dungeon crawl. After that is silence until the oven beeps, its timer up.

Flop. Where's that mitt, there it is. I take out the rolls and leave them atop the stove. They need to cool before I ice 'em, so I still have time to burn.

"Only two rolls per person, Nin," I say at a normal tone. She's eyeing them, I can tell. I've already said that she inhales food; she sort of makes up for the lack of food that I eat. She's downed four rolls in one morning before; at my hungriest, I've only managed three. "If you're still hungry, there's more food in the fridge."

I know this sounds mean, but there are eight rolls and four people to feed. I don't want to be yelled at because mom ended up with no breakfast.

When I reflect on it, it seems like this day will go pretty normally, minus the two hours I ought to have if I weren't dreaming. So much like last summer.

* * *

Ugghhhhh.

I have to wake again and risk getting yelled at, gods damn it. Okay, let's just pretend to be asnooze–

"Shanzira, I know you're awake. Get up, Frederick's ordered the whole camp together."

Damn it, why do I have to share my tent with one of the sharpest people in camp? Moreover, wasn't she supposed to have been mortally injured?

Okay, fine. I sit up, I grab a comb, and immediately fix my hair. It's so itchy if I don't comb it. "Might I ask why?" What, is he going to inspect us for the probability of any of us being the traitorous bastard who sold Emm out to Plegia? Because I'm pretty sure that bastard's dead, if this went anything like the game. There's also another thing I want to know about. "And how did you get better so quickly?"

Robin throws her cloak on– wait, she only just got up, too!– and sits down to don her boots. "For the former, Frederick wants to teach all the new soldiers close order drill. For the latter, Emmeryn is far more skilled with staves than I thought her to be."

Oh my fucking god, yes. I love this shit! COD is when all the soldiers get together and practice drills for marching, turning, all that fun stuff. You have to know the commands perfectly, and they're really not that complicated. And I knew Emmy would be good at healing, she comes with a friggin' A rank in staves. Whoo! All that immediately puts a bounce in my step, and I put my outfit on faster than Robin finishes. "I gotta see that. Where are we meeting?"

"Front of camp," Robin yawns. "What's so great about it?"

I turn and beam at her confused expression. "People. Fuck. Up." And I run to find the front of camp. Mustn't be late!

Okay, the regular soldiers are all here. Like, Sully, Frederick, Cordelia, yeah. Everyone who's accustomed to it. I see a look of surprise register on Frederick's face (he probably expected me to be late) as I stand around. Nobody's called "fall in" yet, so I believe we're free to do as we wish until everyone else turns up.

"I did not expect you to arrive so early, Shanzira." Woop! Hi, Frederick, didn't notice you approaching me there. What, surprised that I have an ounce of discipline?

I show him my big grin. "Why would I be late for this? I've done this before, and it's really fun to watch new people screw up at it. Oh, this is gonna be great." Welsh, Nin, and quite a few new Shepherds are going to screw up and it is going to be glorious.

Huh? Why didn't I include Eldrad? I believe he knows a thing or two or this as well. As for Shio, she's also done this before, but not too much. I probably should've lumped her in with the people who won't know what they're doing.

Oh, look, I found Waldo. I mean Kellam.

Frederick clears his throat a little. "I do hope you understand that a straight face is required for this drill?"

I turn to see him again; he sounds like he wants to say something, but he's having trouble with it. "Yeah, I know that. I can keep a straight face. I've had twenty years of practice with that!" Twenty solid years is a lot of time; I've got it down damn near perfectly. It helps to read "you laugh, you lose" threads.

He pauses, then nods. "Very well. As long as you understand this." He takes a few steps away so as to have a better vantage point from which to observe everyone.

I still don't get that weird tone he's got. I've never seen him make that face, either. He sounds hesitant, almost fearful. No, fearful's too strong a word. Apprehensive is too weak, though. Skittish is probably the best. Nervous. Okay. Why would he be nervous, though? Maybe it's Chrom. Hm.

WHOA HOLY SHIT I HEAR RAISED VOICES. I look over; seems Chrom's losing his temper again. Okay, seriously, I hate it when this happens. Can't people just keep their antics under the hat? Perhaps I'd better get a closer look of the situation. Chrom's not _yelling_, but he's definitely not happy with Frederick. Frederick is making much the same face I do when I'm being chewed out, scrunching it up.

Okay, I'm not about to stand by idly. I've had way too much of people yelling at each other in my life.

I approach the scene. "Will you shut it, Chrom? You're losing your temper every other day, and for the love of Naga, you need to learn a thing of self-control." I've got my eyes half-open, my face relaxed, like I'm coolly telling him off. ... Yeah, that's condescending.

He stares at me, eyes wide in disbelief. "This doesn't concern you, Shanzira." ... Disbelief isn't how I'd imagined him reacting.

I crack my knuckles behind my back. "You're yelling at my boyfriend for Naga-knows-why, I'm not going to sit by idly when he's making the sort of face which implies he did nothing wrong." I'm keeping my lips slightly parted in a snarl, but it's not a big snarl. A warning, if anything.

Chrom shakes his head. "Frederick, I'm ordering you to straighten yourself out by the end of the day. Understood?"

As though resigned, Frederick nods. "As you command, milord." He turns to face everyone else and projects his voice. "Fall in!"

No time to even talk. Okay, then, fine! I hurriedly grab a spot in the line. Only twenty-one of us– phew, it's an odd number; we can do dress-center-dress properly. On either side of me are Lissa and Robin. Heh, even the princess and tactician aren't exempt.

* * *

Oh my gods that was hilarious.

I'm going to list the funniest fuck ups: Gaius dropping candy, Shio made Stahl trip because she was marching out of step, and there was a lot of newbies not getting open and close ranks. But the one that took the cake was Welsh throwing Eldrad. I don't even know how that happened, and Eldrad got KO'd for it, but holy Naga it was hilarious.

I love these guys; they're like the Twilight Knights, but they try to be more serious and fail epically.

Anyways, after Eldrad got KO'd, Frederick dismissed us except for Lissa and Maribelle, who had to stick around to heal him. I heard Maribelle grumbling audibly– Heh, she _really_ doesn't like him– but I proceeded to wander off.

Oh, hey, Frederick. He looks a little worried over something. "I thought you were making sure Maribelle healed Eldrad properly."

Without changing his expression, he replies, "Lissa will ensure nothing goes wrong. In any case, I have a confession to make."

I tilt my head a little. It's probably something little; Frederick worries over the smallest of things. "Go on?"

Frederick pauses, hesitating for obvious reasons. He takes a sigh before speaking again, sounding pained as he does so: "I... have not been entirely honest with you. There was but one reason I asked you to lunch that day, and... it was to investigate your loyalty."

What.

"Explain." My head tilts forward, eyes once again half-lidded, mouth in that slight snarl.

I'm pretty sure Frederick's aware of the hot water he's in; it's obvious from his tone as he continues. "I continued this act for the purpose of exposing any disloyalty to milord, and emotions have played no part in this... "relationship" until now."

I take in a slow, ragged breath. "Lies about little things I can handle. If it had turned out you'd taken my favorite inking quill just to mess with me, I would've been okay with that. But this? You took such an extreme measure just to figure out if I'd stab you in the back?"

Mind, my voice is at a low tone; I'm not yelling. Yelling doesn't illustrate this properly at all. Yelling serves no purpose here. You only yell if you're frustrated; no explosion can properly describe what I'm feeling.

"Yes." He nods his head once.

I'm silent for a good while. I need to find the right words to say; if I just scream at him, he won't learn a thing. No, I have to be damn careful about this.

"You toyed with my heart just to serve your own selfish purpose when there were a thousand other ways to test my loyalty, without arousing my ire. These are the reasons for which I would stab a so-claimed ally in the back, if he had done so to me already. Ere you ready your lance, know that it's not Chrom I'm angry with, it's you. One does not take a woman's heart and poke it around as one would with an experiment. Have never you heard the saying "Hell hath no fury like a woman's scorn"?

A lengthy speech, but it suits my mood perfectly. I get all proper when I'm mad, see, it's my way of trying to hide it.

He bows his head forward in apology. "All I can say is I very much regret it. I am sorry, but I–"

I'm not interested in hearing the rest of this. "Goodbye, Frederick." I pull a sharp about-face and march away. I don't look behind me or even try to see how he's reacting; I just know that I've likely hit him with a devastating blow. Good. That's exactly what I meant to do.

Let's see how long I can contain myself. Hopefully long enough for my anger to melt away. I return to the tent I share with Robin and sit cross-legged on the bedroll.

I hear the tent flap flutter for a moment, and Robin pokes her head in. "Shanzira, I just saw Frederick outside, and he looks like– Shanzira?"

Looks like she finally noticed.

She steps forward and sits on her bedroll. "What's wrong?"

Siiiigghhhhhhh.

"You'll find out from someone else soon enough. As it is, I have no desire to lose my temper right now." I do not need to relive that moment; it's taking enough self-control to hold myself back now.

Robin sits and glances around at the ground for a moment, then crawls forward and– oof.

She didn't need to hug me. What, does she expect me to melt and let it all out? No, I'm better disciplined than that.

She speaks, with tearful apology in her voice. "I don't know what happened, but I know it must have been bad if it has this effect on you. I'm so sorry, Shanzira."

"For your sake, I would advise you to leave me be," I murmur.

I feel the pressure of her arms disappearing from my torso, and a shuffle as she stands. "I hope you feel better soon. When you're down, we're all down."

The tent flap flutters once more as she leaves, and all darkens as I close my eyes and sigh.

I calm myself soon enough, and I don't care what repercussions happen as a result of this.

* * *

**Sinking ships is a sport, I tells ya. I was delighted to see so many people actually thought Shanz would marry Frederick, because it means that my writing's good enough to fool people. However, to those who saw this coming, I offer you points of awesome for being sharp and attentive readers.**

**There was supposed to be a bit more to this, but it was getting a bit long. Anyways... LL: 3, G2G: 0.**

**Edit: ONLY 3000 WORDS?! Holy shit, what? Well five pages isn't much, I suppose. This chapter still flows too well for me to change, so yeah. Not adding to it.**


	22. My Mind Gets Blown

**Author's notes: Wow, been a while. Deeply sorry for my lag! I wanted to post when I got back, but you see, while I was on vacation, I did nothing but be homesick.**

**Ah well I'm doing stuff again, now that I'VE STARTED COLLEGE WHEEEEEE! HOLY CRAP IT IS ****_AWESOME_**** WHEN YOU CAN SAY THAT ONE OF YOUR CLASSES IS THE HISTORY OF VIDEO GAMES.**

**ANYWAYS YES THIS IS CHAPTER 22 AFTER A LONG LAG, IT HAS YUMMY STUFF IN IT LIKE AN A SUPPORT AND ANOTHER BOMBSHELL. Fitting return after that hiatus. I shall get to work writing the other supports pronto... which is to say, between classes.**

**Enjoy the read, I now have 96 followers, and thank all of you! I love you all so much! (especially a certain someone.)**

* * *

"Sweetie, what's wrong?"

My mom has the best intentions, but this is a really hard one to tell her. I normally tell her everything– Yeah, she's privy to my innermost thoughts, the ones I don't tell anyone. That's how much I trust her.

But this one... I'm not sure. It's not that it's embarrassing (for once) but rather that it's unbelievable. I think I'd rather wait 'till I have hard proof before I tell her anything. And a sleep schedule isn't hard proof.

I just groan. Why does this have to be so hard to figure out?

She sits down, depressing the bed with her plump squishiness. "You can tell me."

Okay, surely I can find a way to say it. Um... I open my eyes slightly and glance around the room, off the teal walls to my posters to my computer monitor, to the hat rack dangling off my door, the lime-green laundry basket, the wooden dresser in the corner...

I think of that asshat. How do I say this in plain English? Hm... Unfortunately, tears fill my eyes afresh as my mind visualizes him. "A guy I was dating told me he didn't actually like me." A simple way to do it, but... More accurately, he was only dating me to spy on me and test my loyalty.

Mom's fingers run through my hair, which I've already untied out of frustration. "Oh, dear... What happened?" Her fingers pass to my back, stroking me back into calmness.

I let out a shuddering sigh before I reply, still wet with tears. "I dumped him, but it still hurts..." I make no move to dry the tears on my face, so they drip onto my orange bedsheets.

I've had the same bedsheets since I was six. Huh.

Mom bends over and kisses the top of my head. "It'll be all right. He was wrong to do that."

It's as though she understood what I wanted to say, but couldn't. This is my mom, and this is the bond I share with her. I sit up and wrap my arms around her so as to properly grasp my unmoving rock. Sniffling as I go: "He was really cute and sweet... when he pretended to like me..."

She tilts her head slightly. "What I don't get is why he was dating you in the first place. Do you know?"

I let out a sigh. I don't want to hide things from my mom. "He wanted to find out if I'd ditch his best friend, since we're now sort of buddies. He's really overprotective." I'm stretching it there. Four days at home, I can't keep a friggin' secret. "Let me start over."

This is gonna be a long one.

I detach myself from her and look up at my posters, examining "Peace". "Remember that one game I was really into about the time I graduated high school?"

Her actions are: Pause. Nod. Slow reply. "... Fire Emblem, right? You had a crush on the main character."

An embarrassing memory, there, but I nod. "Yeah. Well, the thing is... Well, you know how I've been sleeping more that usual lately?" She nods again, which I take to be the okay to continue. "Well, when I go to sleep, or rather when I dream, I dream of that world. And it's not really dreaming, because it feels real. As in, I get punched in the face, I feel it. I run myself sore, I feel it here in the morning. So from my experience, it IS real. It's like I'm living in two worlds at once."

That was a lot to dump at one time. Mom's face is somewhat blank; her eyes drifted upwards a little, and her brow's slightly curled in confusion. "So... you actually met him?"

I nod. "Yeah, he's my boss now. He lost his girlfriend, so he's presently taking his grief out on me. ANYWAYS, he's the prince of his kingdom, right? Well, his closest guard and I were dating for a while, and it turned out he only did so to see if I'd stab the prince in the back or not."

Well, judging from the slowness of mom's nod, I'd say she doesn't quite get it. But she still feels for me. I let out a sigh. "The easiest way to understand it is to play the game it's based on. I know, you're not much for games, but I can help you if you need it."

She waves me off. "Nah, I'm fine."

Oh my friggin' god, she can be so lazy sometimes.

I flatten my stare out. "Mom, I can already tell that you hardly get it. You need help. Think of it as homework. Don't worry, it makes it really easy to understand." I reach for my 3DS–

"Not now, honey. Later. But first things first, do you want to go to In 'n' Out?"

Those were the magic words.

I instantly hop up and straighten out. "In 'n' Out?! Really? Of course! Yeah, yeah, yeah!"

To explain, it's a burger joint that's some distance away. It's damn good food, but far enough away that we don't go there much. It's so good that we pretty much consider it a treat. I could really go for their fries about now...

Seeing me brighten up so much makes mom smile as well, and she pats me on the back. "Well, I'll go get dressed. Be ready!"

Nod nod nod. I bounce back as the mattress lifts back up upon mom standing, and then I myself get up and scramble about to grab my purse and things. (Why yes, I do have a purse. It's a nice purse, too. It can carry my sketchbook.) But of course, I'm very careful to make sure I bring my 3DS.

Afterwards is lunch and a crash course about Ylisse. I'm going to quiz her on this tomorrow. Gods, this is silly.

* * *

This is a really annoying fly. I thought I was done with flies when I moved into college... I was so wrong.

Okay, this is really annoying. I dig my spear into the ground beside me, and...

SMACK.

There, dead. ... Ew, it's all over my hands. I squat down and wipe them on the grass and make a mental not to wash later. I grab my spear again.

"Imagining that's Frederick?" Nin asks.

I point over to the target she's supposed to be lighting up, frying, roasting, whatever. "You're supposed to be practicing." I wish I'd thought of that! So much less stress for me. I rarely imagine things I destroy to be people I dislike, probably because I normally don't hate people that much and I normally don't destroy things- last time I did that regularly, I was the family can crusher.

I could really go for some aluminum stomping now.

ZZZTT! Wow, that was fast. There was a ninja-quick blast of light, and now the target's afire. Damn, I have GOT to pay more attention. Nin looks at me expectantly, and I shrug. "Shoot again, I wasn't paying attention."

"Maybe you need to talk about it?" She suggests.

Siiigggghhhh.

"As much as I would love to, there's no place here where I can wail and not be heard. Now shoot the target." I point to the ashes, and Nin just raises an eyebrow.

"It's kinda done."

Smartass. I roll my neck, stab the ground so as to put my spear someplace in sight, and start tromping. I find the nearest spare target- with Virion begging me to hand it back and there are notably arrows stuck in it. I settle it about fifty paces away from Nin, yoink the arrows out, and stand a few feet away from it. "SHOOT!"

BZZZAP!

And it's half-fried. I think her first shot was better than the second. Hm... I walk over to her. "Is my stress getting to you as well?"

"I'm fine," Nin murmurs.

Bullshit. "You fried the whole target before, now it's only half-burnt. This was after I asked you to leave me be." End of argument.

Nin shrugs and fires again- Oh she was right, she hit the center of what remained and turned it to ash. "Okay, fine, sorry." I try to put that as disarmingly as possible, yet at that same time I plucked my spear back out of the ground.

"Hey, Shanz."

"Hey, Welsh." I turn to face him, seeing a bunch of carrots in his right fist, held by the green part. Um, foliage. Derp. Stem? They really conflict with the rest of his appearance: A rogue in black with somewhat worn clothes. His hair is still really greasy.

I keep telling him to wash or cut it, he never does. It's a perpetual mess. "Panne?" Nin was the one who asked that, not me.

"Panne," he agrees. "She dropped this near my tent."

I glance at the carrots again. My first thought it "I would eat those if they were cleaner," but instead of saying THAT I decide to make an innuendo. "I would suck those if they were bigger."

Totally worth the resultant head thwap from Welsh.

"Okay, since you just hit a promoted unit, you can go fetch the next target for Ninny here to roast. Bye!" I point over in the direction of Virion.

Welsh folds his arms. "No. Besides, the French guy's that way."

I grin. "Exactly. Now go." I move to push him, he steps aside, aaaand... This degenerated quickly.

I've managed to wrap my arms around his shoulders in a long-lasting hug. He's trying to get me off while Nin is laughing at how stupid this situation is.

The next voice I hear is new to this conversation: "Shanz, let him go."

"Shiiiiiioooooo," I whine jokingly. "I can't hug my friiiieeeeend?" Regardless, I let Welsh go but for a grip on the wrist so he won't run off.

"Fuck," he groans. "Let go!"

"Naw," Is my response. My excuse is that my gut tells me he'll be useful for this conversation. Where's Eldra- ah, right there.

He sort of stands there, staring from a distance- his face is kinda square-set and squish, and it's not as wonderfully expressive as mine, so it's hard to read it, but I think he's befuddled by our shenanigans. With ginger steps, our resident Scot approaches. "What exactly are you doing?"

"Technically I'm helping Nineeyena practice her spellwork," I answer.

"Spellwork," he repeats.

I shrug. "It derailed."

"I should get some practice in while I'm here," Shio murmurs, pulling a purple tome from her bag. Wait, she has a fucking book bag? Where the hell did she get that? Unless they HAD those back then? It IS a simple design... ?

Nineeyena points to the field. "We need more targets in order to do that."

"Might there be a common issue we suffer of?" Virion inquires, having finally approached enough to make conversation.

Light bulb.

I hold my hands behind my back, tiptoe up to him, and give him my cutest smile. "Yeah! Can I ask you to get us some more targets? We sorta need them to train." I can just imagine myself with anime eyes, cooing "uguu".

He bows, hand over sternum and everything, and answers with gusto, "of course, milady! Virion, away!" And he runs in the most dignified running style I've ever seen. It's hilarious because it's so neat. Like troll logic.

"That's kinda mean," Welsh comments once he's out of earshot. "I mean, you just had the thing with Frederick."

I turn and glare at him.

"Yeah, no, not a bright idea, Welsh," Eldrad says. Quite accurate, my good scotsman. Quite accurate indeed. "Never piss off a woman after a bad break-up."

I turn back to Eldrad, glare uninterrupted.

"Don't kill me?" He squeaks, shrinking up.

I roll my neck again, then I stop and sigh- a nice and heavy exhale. Some friends I have... I'd threaten to use the two of them for target practice, but that's an empty threat and it means nothing.

"Nice to see the five of you together." Tentmate. Hello. I look over at Robin, her silvery hair caught in the air, streaming all over her lowered hood. It's a mess. Stress? "What are you doing?"

"Target practice," I growl, looking between the two guys.

She shrugs. "Well, whatever the reason, I've been meaning to talk to the five of you. It's the five of you who collapse at almost the same time every evening and rise at the same time in the morning- sleeping for twelve solid hours."

I'm pretty sure the thought we're sharing is "oh crap."

Robin raises her hands up in peace. "I'm not accusing you of anything, so Shanzira, you can relax." Well damn, my face IS that expressive. Gotta do something about that. "It's just perhaps you all would like to know this."

As though I'm bargaining: "Go on?" Apparently I'm the leader as I'm the least shy person here.

With a deep breath of preparation, Robin begins a lengthy exposition: "I did some research in Ylisstol, and brushed up on my notes while I was wounded-" oh yeah when she took that damn nasty wound from that air battle wherein Cordelia and I were badasses- "And I've found that there are legends of others like you five. They knew things they shouldn't have and spoke of strange things no one else understood. They were mostly famous for aiding heroes of old- the Hero-King, Anri, and they also crop up in Tellian legends, Jugdrali lore, and even Elibean tales..."

To put this succinctly: Mind. Blown.

And she keeps talking: "There's more. From what I read, it seems these individuals slept so long for a reason- when they slept, they woke elsewhere, in some far-flung realm."

Holy crap, we were outed before we even existed.

"Yeah. That's us. Apparently. We don't really know what we're doing, it just sort of happened one day." How else am I suppose to say it, what am I supposed to do? And behind me, I can hear Shio sighing like I'm doing something dumb. What?

That was all Robin needed- she perks up like a reporter with a notepad full of questions. "Then you know things about our situation? These people- dreamers, as my research dubbed them, they always appeared when the world was near destruction, to help save it."

I inwardly cringe. "Gods, this is so cliche." And I hate being pestered with hard questions. Easy questions are fun, though.

Robin's face quirks as she wonders confusedly at this. "Cliche?"

There's another sigh, this one from Eldrad. "We've read a lot of stories from our old home."

"Okay," I murmur. Time for some snap judgement: How much to tell? Well, it's easy. "Yes, we do know quite a bit that we shouldn't, but we don't know how much will change simply due to our presence. We thought we knew everything, then those hunters appeared to try and kill us, and a Guardian appeared to save us. It's been skewed." That works. Well thought-out, I think. I try to think stuff out before I say it. Dad disagrees, he thinks I blurt without thought. Dumbass.

Robin nods, digesting this. "What can you tell me?"

"Not a lot." She gives me a "what the fuck" face, even though fuck isn't the foremost swear in her mind. "If we tell you stuff, it could change more, make us useless. So far everything's gone pretty damn well-"

"We're at war with Plegia, the Exalt has nearly been killed twice, and she's going back into the jaws of death now. It hasn't been going well." I hate the stare Robin's giving me, the kind of stare where she seems to think I'm insane.

I _siggghhh._

"It's gone well compared to how it could go. For one, she could be dead."

Robin folds her arms. "You had nothing to do with that."

I hold up a finger. "Actually," I'm thinking of Noel here when I say this, "we have, indirectly. I can't explain that quite yet, but our very existence has changed this world. We don't know if our information is accurate or not."

Robin looks me in the eyes... then nods, her expression softened. "Very well. But I will ask for information later, as it could save our lives." Natch.

"It could also kill us." Good god, luck. Fucking. Luck. And for the Homestuck readers, I'm referring to one of Karkat's mental breakdowns while he's on the way to the alpha kids' session. "We were all tacticians ourselves at one point or another, though of varying degrees of competence." Case in point: Eldrad's good, I fucking SUCK. "We're being careful as well... Our ultimate goal is to see things go better than they would without us."

"I'll bear this in mind. Thank you. I'll talk to the rest of you later." She leaves, that glorious cloak of hers (once ruined, now mended) flowing in the wind of her wake.

"Welp." I didn't register who said that, but it sure sums up our situation.

"Welp," I echo, and walk off.

We were outed, and yet we're not dead, and we've waded through all of the awkward. I think Robin will handle it all from now; surely she's better at explaining things. On the other hand, she's going to grill us later- there are still questions unanswered, like how we know this stuff.

_Urrrgggghhhh._

Hello, Frederick.

"Shanzira-"

And that was all he got out before my fist shot through his face with a sharp and satisfying crack. I'm not sure whether the crack was his nose or my knuckles, but with the exception of my left hand I feel much better now. I raise my spear and point it at him. "Sparring fields, five minutes." I don't listen to his answer, but go there right away.

Why yes, I'm on autopilot. What am I supposed to do with myself in my present state, raise bunnies and hug puppies?

Frederick is quite punctual (as ever), and Chrom is right behind him. I ignore the boss and point my pointy at him. "Come on over here."

He and Chrom glance between each other, then Frederick takes up a sword- yes, sword, granting me the advantage- and settles into a stance.

In five minutes, my left hand's not alone. The rest of me hurts as well.

No, it wasn't one duel that last five minutes- at least not by the twilight knights' rules. See, I got back up every time Frederick knocked me to the ground, stood fast when I got hit, and in general refused to give in. He didn't get to point his sword at my neck, because I did everything I could to keep a grip on my spear so I could knock the blade away. Every tactic I knew to avoid defeat, I used. So my strategy wasn't to win, but rather to not lose.

Sort of my life's strategy, actually.

It's after five solid minutes- which feels SO much longer than it is- that Frederick finally lowers his sword and stares at me as I nurse my injuries. "Why?"

That was a croak, I note. I also note my lack of care for his voice. "Because you hurt me in a way I'm careful to guard myself against."

I must really hate him if I don't care for his apparent misery. Sucks to be him, doesn't it? Hell hath no fury like a woman's scorn, as he's learning.

"Prick," I hiss, briskly skirting him to exit the field.

* * *

"How are you doing, Shanzira?"

I plop myself onto my hastily unfurled bedroll, exhaustion present in my sigh. "I'm dead but still walking. And you?"

I can't see her face, or even her at all, but I imagine she's tilting her head towards me as she answers. "Tired as well, but I'm all right."

"Good," I sigh. "Naga knows we'd be screwed if something happened to you."

I'm definitely on autopilot now– I'm speaking without thought. Used to do this as a kid, and I was still clever enough. I have nothing going through my head, I'm just replying with what my mouth forms first. You can ensure honesty this way...

Footsteps approach me, with the sharp clat of heels against ground. "So were you aware of this when you drew this?" Aaaaand my shipping art is dangled before me. Is she still on about that?

Another sigh. I seem to be doing that a lot. "That was only a lighthearted prank to see your face and reaction. Sorry, I was just... being stupid." Yeah. Being stupid. As always...

The artwork vanishes from my sight, and Robin sits next to me (I can tell because my bedroll gave way where she's sitting). "You really like to imagine me and Chrom together, don't you?"

"Yeah," I yawn. "You two look like a really cute couple." One-time OTP.

"Perhaps even doing things a little more scandalous?"

... Oh. Oh Naga, I'm an idiot. She was wondering just how dirt– can I escape this conversation now?

"Robin, please, for the love of all the gods, do _not_ lead me to imagine such things." This is not a particularly good time for me to be imagining naked men GODS DAMN IT!

WHY DO I HAVE SUCH A DIRTY MIND?!

I hear her chuckle. ... _Chuckle?_ "I can see why you enjoy it," she says.

CAN I STRANGLE HER?! I look straight at her and she- oh.

Now I get it.

"Geddoff my bedroll," I grumble as I push her off of it. When she hits the ground, she's laughing too hard to care. "That was mean."

She gasps for breath. "I can see why you enjoy your pranks." Wiping tears of laughter from her eyes, Robin sits up and looks at me. She probably just added a hell of a laugh line to her face. "It feels just as good to get revenge for that."

I look at her in slight terror. "Gods, what have I unleashed upon this world? A master tactician with a fetish for pranking– I fear for all who you might target." Specifically, myself.

With a smaller chuckle, she says, "you needn't worry, O mistress of japes." Why does that make me worry more? "I will wield this gift wisely as a tactician would. I'll be sure to tell Chrom you've repaid your debt for the posters."

I would hope for that to be the end of it, but my gut's screaming too loudly at me (and I'm pretty sure that's not my appetite). So: "Robin, can we just stop the prank business here and now before we both go so far south that we won't be able to get out of it?"

She looks my in the eye. I still can't believe her eyes are brown instead of red, but ehhh, fine. Red would make tons more sense for a fellblood, though. "All right. All you had to do was ask. We're friends, aren't we?"

I... Suppose we are. I have a habit of making close friends without realizing it. One day it's just chatting over a campfire, the next I'm sharing fanfic ideas. I mean, Robin and I are good enough friends that we can mind fuck each other and completely forgive each other for it.

That says a lot.

"I guess we are friends." I lie back down on my bedroll. "I didn't even realize I was being friendly. It just sort of happened."

She sits back down next to me. "Going to sleep? We march tomorrow."

I yawn. Let's face it, I'm so exhausted that only a nap can fix my issues here. "Yup." I adjust my coat and turn over.

* * *

I wake with a yawn. I didn't have anything to do while I was awake, so I just got a snack and played on my 3DS. I've missed some of those games... I was playing some old DS games. So much fun. Yaaaawwwwn.

"How was your nap?" I hear Robin ask.

"Fine," I murmur. "Didn't do anything, just had a snack and lazed." Right, she... she knows about that shenanigan. "And what'd you do?"

She shrugs. "Spoke with Chrom about our next move, how to more efficiently get from here to Ferox."

There is something in her mouth causing her voice to sound thicker.

"What are you eating?" I sit up. ... There's chocolates... A BOX OF CHOCOLATES?! "GIMME!" I dart up and try to snatch some, but she swipes it away from my reach too quickly. DAMN!

"These are mine, Gaius gave them to me." I DON'T CARE GIMME GIMME WAIT WAIT GAIUS GAVE THEM TO HER THAT MEANS THEY'RE REALLY GOOD AND HOW DID SHE GET GAIUS TO PART WITH CHOCOLATE?!

"H.. huh... How..." I ogle her and the chocolate as I try to gurgle that out. "How did you... get candy from G-Gaius?"

She shrugs and downs a truffle... oh Naga, why are truffles my favorite? "He, um, gave them to me. Willingly. Free of charge, no nothing, just..."

"I don't buy it," I blurt immediately.

"We're dating."

... What?

_WHAT?_

"You and Gaius are... a thing?"

Robin nods at me slowly. "Umm, we are. He, uh... made me a pendant, and... It's nice. He's quite sweet."

Well. Fuck.

"Guh... Good luck."

That's all I can bring myself to say. She got a good relationship, and I... I...

Fuck you, Frederick.

"So I guess that means you and Chrom aren't–?"

She shakes her head at me as I'm a little slow. "No. I even asked if he felt that way towards me."

Whu... "And he..."

"Doesn't."

I stand and walk out of the tent.

I go to the mess tent and sit down.

I blink a few times.

This is going to take a while to digest.

My one-time OTP just got sunk.

* * *

**:D**

**Another shipping question! Which of the two– oh wait there are three, he hasn't been revealed yet– WHICH OF THE THREE MALE DREAMERS DO Y'ALL SHIP SHANZ WITH? WELSH? ELDRAD? OR MYSTERY MAN? GO GO GO!**


	23. Calm Before the Storm

**Author's notes: For labor day, the Shepherds get a break. Not me! I'm writing away. Anyways, I got some training in on Saturday, got my ass handed to me, it hurt. But I learned stuff. Can't remember right now, but I did.**

**Anyways, this should end filler for a little bit. As in we get a little bit more plot next time. I think. (not sure, I'll need to check my chapter schedule). Idk. Just have fun reading this one, I tried to pack it with humor. Some's subtle, some's not. But there IS a reference which some older FE players should get.**

* * *

You know, if I had cold adaptation, I wouldn't mind flying so much. Seriously, it might not be snowing or even near 32 degrees Fahrenheit, but it's still damn chilly. Ferox in summer, chilly. Lon'qu's probably been complaining about how hot Ylisse is.

Imagining him in Plegia is funny.

But seriously, I can reach over and touch a cloud, then I have to shelter and warm my hand for ten minutes before it's recovered enough to expose to the air.

The ground looks warm and stable, I would give so much to be on it right now.

"'Delia," I shout to my scout-buddy, "you know what I see ahead of us?"

She slows to match my pace. "What?" She's concerned, perhaps worried I've spotted an ambush. Now I feel like I'm crying wolf.

"A whole lot of cold nothing," I groan.

She grits her teeth at me and proceeds to admonish me. "Don't complain, Shanzira. At least we're not on the ground, exhausting ourselves with every step."

Didn't I just say that I wanted to be on the ground, moving my muscles and warming myself the hell up?

Mm, hell. That sounds really good about now.

I let out a sigh to try and calm my mind, and as I do, my rebuttal comes to mind. "Cordelia, I can see my own breath because of the cold. That is not good."

I'm such a whiny bitch.

She snorts, but relents. "All right. You have been flying awhile; you can land. Send Nineeyena back when you do." It's like she envisions herself my mother. She's certainly telling me what to do like one... And my mom certainly is the sort of parent who coddles her children. (Kind of screwed my siblings and I over.)

Anyways, bring Nin back, she said. "Sure thing." I move to descend, but it takes a while- for the love of god, we're at the level to hit low clouds. It's pretty high up. I pat Elincia. "We're gonna be warmer soon, no worries, girl."

She neighs in response, the neigh being notably staggered, like she's shivering. Poor girl. Can't wait until we touch the ground... woop.  
Ah, that wonderful feeling of relief when Elincia's hooves touch the ground and all finally stops in place. I suffer myself to jiggle more atop her and trot her over to the convoy, where Robin is reclining comfortably.

Little bitch.

Nearby is Ninny, sitting on her pegasus, writing in a notebook. (writing on horseback? Wow.) "Nin, I'm having a break. Your turn to scout with Cordelia."  
She closes the book, stuffs it in a saddlebag, and nods. She grabs the reins, kicks her legs in, and WHUMP.

I did not need the blast of frigid air to the face I just received.

I turn around to the convoy and bend over to see Robin. She takes note of me and immediately sits up so as to appear more industrious. "Problem?" I can just imagine a trollface on her.

I point a finger up. "It's freezing up there?" How like me to exaggerate.

She twists, digs around in a pile of stuff, then throws a ball of brown fluffy stuff at me, which (as I turn it over) reveals to be a fur coat. I put it on immediately, because really, screw looking nice, I'm cold. "Here. I've been distributing these to the other Shepherds as well."

I didn't see Cordelia wearing one. ... Hardcore.

"You still get to ride in the convoy," comes the grumble. Right before I could stop myself. "Ignore that... I'll be fine."

She looks at me carefully. "You sure?"

I nod. "Yeah, yeah, just bitching. 'Scuse me." I go to pick a good spot in our formation and follow along there.

For lack of better words.

Whenever my speech gets extremely vague, it means I don't know what I'm doing. The more vague my diction, the less of a clue I have. So when I say I picked a spot in our formation and I'm following along, the approximate percentage of clue I have is 30%.

Or something.

Actually, I'm surprised I haven't narrated my whole "adventure" really vaguely. Then again, I have a shitload of an idea of what I'm supposed to do here. I know the plot like the back of my hand (cue "oh hey where'd the mark of Grima come from") and I also know the characters pretty well. I guess I'm just hanging on to this whole tale for the thrill of the ride.

... Was that vague? I hope not. I've already forgotten my wording. Remembering my thoughts is hard, it's why I keep a journal every now and then.

"Shanzira," I twist my neck around to regard Chrom, a coat over his cape and his pauldron resting over that. "Why aren't you in the air?"

... Something's very wrong here. From his tone of voice, he's looking for a fight, and there's pretty much nothing wrong with me being on the ground as long as there are still two pegasus riders up there.

It's either that or I'm reading too much into it, which happens. My dad is a great teacher on how to tiptoe around angry people- he teaches by experience. As in, he's irritable for lengthy periods of time and it's up to the people close to him to not be in the radius of his explosion.

Anyways, point is that Chrom's reminding me of those encounters right now.

"I'm cold and tired, been flying for a while, it's high time I had a break." There, perfectly justifiable, yes? It's not like I have infinite stamina. I'm only human... as I constantly remind my father.

"I... have another question."

Muh? I pull my head out of the clouds and look back at Chrom. He sounds suspicious, and I'm reminded of a certain asshole I'm making a point of ignoring. "Shoot." Actually, now that I look at Chrom, he seems more confused. I can't read voice tones for shit, can I?

"Why are you doing this to Frederick? I haven't seen him so wounded in my life, and I've known him a long time." Or maybe I can, because he sounds like he's chewing me out. Okay, just... keep calm.

I close my eyes and try to spell my thoughts into words. "He lied to me without thought of the consequences, but more importantly, as I said yesterday–" I'm remembering that Chrom was there when I 'sparred' with Frederick– "he hurt me in a way I carefully guard against. That sort of hurt my pride."

He lets out the slightest bit of air– he's hit a setback and trying not to react. "Is pride really so important?"

I puff myself up, chest out (and I'm pretty sure any guys looking my way might enjoy the view). "It's an integral part of my personality; I wouldn't be me without it. And being me is also important to me." Sort of like a vicious cycle– I'm proud of being me, and because of that I want to hang on to said pride.

Chrom stares hard at me, as though he's analyzing my body language. "I see. I understand better now. However, I'd like you to leave Frederick be, Shanz. He sincerely regrets what he did."

He's being surprisingly gentle, considering the tone he walked up to me with. Now how do I answer this without sounding like a petulant child? "I want to make sure he understands that he did more harm than good, and that he won't do anything like this to anyone else."

With a nod and a determined tone, Chrom replies, "he won't, I can assure you." After that, he waves and tromps off.

Well, he did manage to disarm me. Takes a hell of a lot of effort to get me to loosen my grudges, and he did it pretty well. And he claims he can't do diplomacy? Please, if it's an argument between two of his friends he can do it damn well. He's more like his sister than he thinks he is.

Strange. He can keep his friends from fighting each other, but he's certainly more inclined to pick up the sword than talk whenever he or his buddies are attacked. Yeah, certainly fitting that he's called a Shepherd.

Anyways...

I could really go for some company. Not Chrom, mind, I'm still trying to avoid him. I just talked to Robin, and while we are good friends, I shouldn't burn all my time on one of them. Uh... Jeebus.

I lean on Elincia's neck. I'm only slightly tired, but more than that, my thoughts are filled with a sense of melancholy. I don't know why; my emotions don't always make sense. But the last time I felt like this, it was about a month or so before I started my antidepressants. Except, of course, I don't have the damn digestive issues. Thank the gods for that. Seriously, when you have a stomachache so annoying that it forces you out of bed early and you can't put any physical strain on yourself without fear of throwing up, it sucks. I had to bring yogurt to school so I could eat breakfast, because I desperately needed the chilly air to calm my stomach enough to eat. I'm much better now, but I'm always living in fear that the meds will fail. I've had anxiety attacks recently, what more do I need?

... I need to distract myself. I sit up and cast my eyes about, looking for a fun-looking conversation. Ah! Vaike, Donnel, Stahl, and Lon'qu. Anything with Lon'qu in it is going to be funny. Elincia's reins jingle as I pick them up and trot her over to them. "Heya, guys."

Vaike– who was wise enough to grab a coat– is the first to respond. "Heyo, Shanz! How's the sky?"

I hear Lon'qu grumble "please keep your distance" in his low yet easily audible voice as Donnel pipes up in excitement, the cute little newbie. "Well, hi, there! Don't reckon I've seen you much."

Oh, gods, my parents would love talking to him. When they talk to people with a southern accent, they feel like they've come home. Donnel sounds like he's been around the Georgia area.

This in mind, I smile at him. "It's Shanzira. And you are?" Playing dumb because we haven't officially met.

He raises a hand up in a sloppy salute. "Donnel, but you can call me Donny, miss Shanzira!"

Gods, he's adorabubble. Like a kid. No wonder his supports with Lissa are cute.

And last but not least, Stahl greets me. "So what's up?"

"THE SKY!" Vaike blurts. Really? That's more infantile than a pun in python.

... How do I even remember my first day in that class?

Thus, I respond with a good snark. "Your head, Vaike. It's pretty high up there in the clouds, it's so full of hot air." Oh, how I love the sound of cute guys laughing at a joke. And there's even Lon'qu, snickering like a tsundere.

Oh my gods, Lon'qu as a tsundere? I think I just had the most awesome thought ever. If he knew of the term, he'd never live this down.

"Hey!" Vaike's voice cuts through the laughter. "If that means the Vaike can fly, then the Vaike can fly!"

oh my gods he doesn't even get it can i just die laughing now?

I nod happily. "That's what I like about you, Sir Simpleton."

"You insult the Vaike?!" He puffs up, rising to the script. Donny and Stahl watch, eagerly grinning as they await my response.

I shake my head. "No, that was a compliment. You're a very simple man, Vaike, living only for battle and whatnot." Okay, that was slightly inaccurate– Vaike lives to be the best– but it still works.

The grin revives as the guffaws resume. "Great! Thanks!" He then turns to Stahl and Donnel, as Lon'qu's done a surprisingly good job of masking his amusement. "What are you two laughing at?"

"Life is boring without you, Kieran," I quote happily under my breath. Meanwhile, Stahl quickly shoves some bread into his mouth to save himself the trouble of responding. He's like Lowen, I swear. Which reminds me, I should replay Blazing Sword and use him, I'm too fond of Sain.

Lon'qu says something to distract Vaike (I miss what it is, sadly) while Donny makes use of the reprieve to chat with me. "Lady Shanzira, I reckon yer pretty good at this wit stuff!"

I chuckle almost as Virion would upon receiving such a compliment, then I take a more humble attitude. "I do my best. Years of practice with a tough teacher. But I'm not a lady, no need for the title." (Seriously, my ancestors were KNIGHTS. Not nobles.)

He frowns slightly, probably wondering if it's ok to call me by something so informal. "Er... all right, Shanzira."

"Careful, Donny." Whoa, that was Lon'qu. And he's not really talkative. "She doesn't really care who she uses that wit on."

I fold my arms and smile. "Aww, Lon'qu, I'm hurt!" I'm purposefully throwing in a really innocent tone; there's the humor. "You make it sound like I tease everyone around me! Well, that's wrong. I only tease people I like!"

"Exactly," he responds. That was perfect. Part of me wants to date him, just because of his gynophobia. But that's also mean– there's more to him than his fear of women. Sadly, it's what I see most of the time because I AM female. Oh, wow, dumped only a couple of days ago and already thinking about the next guy to go after. This is not healthy.

Can't stop, won't stop.

"Ru-really?" I look back at Donnel to find him blushing HOLY NAGA THAT IS ADORABLE! "So who all d'ya tease?"

I look upwards a little, as though I'm thinking for my response. "I'd tease everyone in the Shepherds, but it's taking me a while to get around to y'all. That and there are some people here who I just don't want to tease." I sort of stick with the more important characters, like Robin, who forgives me for being such a bitch.

"Like?" Prompts Stahl.

I hold up my hands and tick off fingers. "Donny here, 'cause that would be mean; Chrom, because teasing one's boss is a really great way to get fired; Miriel, because I'd lose a wit duel with her quickly; Maribelle, because nobody messes with her... Actually, a lot of it is that I respect you lot enough not to do that." A way to save face while also admitting that I don't want to have my ass handed to me in one way or another.

"So you don't respect the Vaike, huh?"

Whoa. Did not see that coming. I look to Vaike and find his arms folded as he marches, head tilted around to look at me. He's sharper than he looks, damn. "Bluntly, not really. I do know not to piss you off, though." Hopefully that was sufficiently diplomatic.

Stahl's turn in the conversation, let's see what he has to say. "What about Frederick?"

Apparently this is karma for being such a bitch. "Don't ask about him," I answer in a low voice. "Please."

Vaike turns around, quirking an eyebrow. "Why?"

"He lied to her," Lon'qu answers simply.

"O–oh." And I assume that from there he figures out that Frederick and I turned out to be a train wreck.

I snort, somewhat satisfied to find the air coming out of my nostrils to be visible. "Yeah, so if I'm a bit irritable over that, you know why."

"I dun geddit," Donny whines. "Lied 'bout what?"

It takes all of my patience to not knock the pot off of Donnel's head. "Stop there. You can get the details from someone else, I'm not going to tell that story." Ever.

There's an awkward pause, broken moments later by clinking armor– Stahl's waving a baguette around. "Alright, let's talk about something else. Anyone want some bread?"

"Sure, I'm hungry!" Yes, that was me– never mind how me managed to stuff a baguette into his bags and pull it out in almost perfect condition. I LOVE ME MY BREAD.

Donnel happily rips off a piece. "Mm, food!"

Indignant: "Hey, where's mine?" Sorry, Vaike, but Lon'qu's kind of beating you to it. Without a word. After Lon'qu draws back, om-nom-nomming his bread (I swear to Naga that's how he's eating it, down to the sound!) Vaike finally gets an oversized piece.

"Don't forget me!"

WHAT THE FUCK?!

KELLAM?!

HOLY SHIT KELLAM'S HERE.

And Stahl's just handing him bread and oh dear gods please tell me Stahl at least noticed him.

"Where the hell did you come from?" I squawk.

Kellam shrugs, and only then do we all notice his clinking armor. "I was just, um, here. The whole time."

"Wooooooow," Donnel admires, "I sure wish I could sneak like that!"

"You guys didn't notice him?" We're just as confounded as you are, Stahl. In other news, you actually did see him. Wow, I'm impressed.

Of course, Mr. Shirtless Scene puffs up proudly and points his thumb to his chest. "The Vaike knew Kellam was there! Hey, how've you been, buddy?"

Kellam frowns. "If you knew I was there, why didn't you say anything?" Pretty sure we're all thinking along those lines, those beautiful lines of bullshit.

Vaike can't seem to find a decent answer, as he's stammering like mad. "Uh, um, er, reasons!"

"I don't think yer bein' honest, Vaike," drawls Donnel. (drawling Donnel. Huh.) But yes, very astute. (sarcasm.)

Gritting his teeth, the resident ego finally confesses. "Oh, fine. The Vaike admits it, he was surprised, too."

Kellam sighs.

I decide to break the silence. "Well, free bread." I bite a good piece off. "I'm going to..." I yawn just after swallowing it down, "ask if we can stop yet." I twist Elincia's reins some and trot her elsewhere as a few of the guys wave and shout "see you!" along with a whistle from Vaike.

Really? Where's a rock when I need one? Agh, I probably couldn't throw it straight if I did grab one. I'm really tired.

"Robin," I yawn at the tactician, "when do we rest?"

She looks at me, notes my expression, then checks the progress of the sun. "Well," apparently deciding that it is near time for me to fall asleep, "Cordelia says we'll be at a village soon. We'll stop there for the night."

I yawn again. "Good." I wipe my eyes. "I'm about to... zz."

I probably fell asleep before I hit something. I sure hope so.

* * *

Okay, maybe not; my face hurts. I change out of my nightshirt, trying to ignore it, and my mom walks in a few minutes after I've settled that. What time is it? ... 8? Okay, sure. Doesn't make se– my clock is off, damn it. I still need to reset it (I've needed to reset it for years). 7:33, if I do the math right.

Mom plops herself onto my bed and wraps one squishy arm around me. "So how was it last night?"

I mumble and grumble, then bury my face into her side. "Marching in cold conditions."

"It's summer."

Yeah, and? "Our destination's pretty far north. At least it was only cold and not snowing."

She leans away from me and stares in disbelief. "Jesus, where have you been?"

I shrug, because hell if I'm sure. "Except for the place we're going, it's been mostly comfortable. It's like living in England or Canada– normal temperatures when it's not snowing. I dunno, it's weird."

"Definitely," she murmurs to the side. "Well, what do you say we go see a movie?"

I love my mom– I don't care how much she coddles me, I love her, she's a big sweetie. "What do you have in mind?"

* * *

Wow, that was fun. Movie, shopping, food, and just a general fun day out on the town, my mother and I. She noticed me starting to fall asleep and started to head home, understanding my situation.

She's so nice! This is why I trust her so much.

Anyways, the here and now is that we've arrived in the Feroxi capitol, and people are moping. I hate it when they mope, I really do. It's depressing. Come on, guys... Well, maybe I should save it for when the bombshell arrives.

On second thought, my solution to the morale problem is too good to pass up. "SNOWBALL FIGHTS, ANYONE?!"

"Snowball fights?" That was Lissa, she was the first to chirp excitedly. "Oh, yes! Let's do teams!"

Lissa, I love you. I love you so much. "I'm gathering all the Shepherds. Go!" I point down a corridor. "Go, my friendly princess buddy!"

"Right!" And ever so cheerfully, she dashes down that way, her pigtails bouncing behind her.

I run off in another direction, and encounter three fellow redheads. "Sully, Cordelia, Miriel! SNOWBALL FIGHT!"

Sully's face instantly twists into a feral grin. "Hell yeah! It's about time I reclaimed my place as the snowball queen!" Sully, you are no ice queen. Ever.

"Excuse me, but..." What, Cordelia? "What is a snowball fight?"

_It's pretty self-explanatory!_ But Miriel begins to define it anyways. "A friendly altercation wherein a group of individuals lob frozen precipitation at each other, with the goal to become champion of the arena."

A smile breaks Cordelia's melancholy. "That sounds fun."

I nod. "Then hurry along!" I dash off through the hall in the same direction, skidding to a stop alongside some of the guys. "Boooyyys," I say in a flirting tone, "Snowbaaall fiiiiggght!"

Donnel turns around, not at all sure what he just heard. "What in tarnation?" (Probably never had someone hit on him.)

"Oh, yeah," Stahl murmurs, then speaks with more volume. "The girls had one last time we went to Ferox. Is this one co-ed?" He smiles hopefully.

I nod wildly. "YUP!"

I could've sworn I'd heard something like someone disappointingly sighing something. Maybe along the lines of "I bet nobody will even notice me." Either it was Kellam or my imagination, and I honestly can't tell.

And finally, I dive into a lump of snow and start building up a fort. Shio joins me, because fuck if we're fighting separately. After that, we build up a team of five people– myself, Shio, Sully, Lissa, and Cordelia. We buff up our fort accordingly, then begins the slaughter.

The part that delighted me the most was Frederick being the first to give up because snow was getting in his armor. Guess who did that? Yours truly. He promptly went off to change, then we got a good while of "screw the rules"– type fun in.

After Frederick left, I started paying more attention to the field. I noticed Cordelia aiming for Chrom– really subtle way to try and get his attention, yet he never noticed who was hitting him. Shio got pelted in the face by Stahl (I didn't know he had that in him). Oh, wait, no, Gaius contributed to that, too.

And then Gaius backstabbed Stahl.

This is really fun, I just suck at being a sports announcer.

Lissa doesn't have any snow on her, apart from what's getting on her hoop skirt from crouching so much. Lucky. Meanwhile, Sully is continuing to melt stuff, but at least she's not dragging us down.

We're just about winning when Frederick returns to the field, with Basilio in tow.

Uh-oh.

"Milord, milady! There is important news to tell you!" Robin and I both stand and call a cease-fire (on opposite ends of the field) and the royals stand and approach the two. I also inch towards the conversation, because I'm just nosy.

"Bad news, Chrom," Basilio rumbles. Damn, this guy has a low voice. "Ylisstol... fell. Gangrel's soldiers captured Emmeryn and retreated across their lines."

Lissa faints, Robin catches her, and I sigh. Basilio continues the report, and I sigh once more. "So, I take it we're marching again, Robin?"

She nods, looking absent-minded. "I'd say so."

* * *

**Okay... finished the chapter. I can go eat and slack and have fun now. Whee...**

**No question-of-the-update, you guys can exchange whatever theories and guesses you have. Too tired to think of one.**

**Edit: So tired I forgot to name the chapter. Wow. Fixed.**


	24. Spectating is Fun

**I've realized that my writing style seems to improve when I'm tired. That or I'm crazy. But it seemed to me that my writing quality while doing this was bananas. Soooo, this is going to be a good chapter. Sadly, Shanz herself doesn't get much action, but she does snark at it all.**

**Oh yeah! I'm in Asleep now! (yes, that's my real name. I'm still sticking with Shanzira here, though, it feels like a rule of the fic. Personal rule. I don't break personal rules.) Yes, I am a snarky bitch that goes "meh" at other people's troubles because they are not my own. (I helped G2G write that chapter so he could get my reactions down.) Now guess what my alternate's like... HAHAHAHA!**

**Anyways, back to your regularly scheduled AWESOME! Enjoy the read, guys!**

* * *

If I were wearing shoes instead of boots, I would hate everything right now. There would be sand _everywhere._

But thankfully, I'm wearing boots. Praise Naga. The zippers are okay at keeping sand out (zippers which have been long since hidden by flaps because I need to wear these boots to renfairs as they're the most comfortable pair I own) and I am happy.

I am happy even though it's hot and I'm wearing this ridiculous coat. And I'm atop a really warm animal. I'm pouring sweat, but I don't really mind. I was like this whenever I visited the south with my family.

And then there's the sand. It's glittering like a sea of glass particles. Okay, perhaps not that elegant of a way to put it, but it's really pretty. Sure, the air's wiggling and stuff because it's hot and distorting everything, but in California, you get used to that; it happens all the time in summer.

Meanwhile, Shio is dying. Figuratively.

"Need a little help, buddy?" She's dressed in this close-fit dark robe, right? Yeah, really warm attire. At least my coat is really baggy, so my skin's not making too much contact with the fabric which absorbs the light into heat.

I know physics!

"Are you offering a lift?" She pants. It would be really condescending to go "aww" at her exhaustion, but I kid you not: That was my first thought. But it was the first thing I thought, not the first thing I said. The first thing I said– or rather, say– goes like this:

"Sure. Gotta warn you, though; Elincia's pretty warm, too." I offer her my hand anyways, and she gladly takes it.

Now she's behind me and sweating buckets! At least she's not getting sand in her shoes or exhausting her legs further.

Meanwhile, my knees feel like they need a good stretch. I hand the reins off to Shio, spotting a nice mark not too far up ahead. "Watch Elincia for me, Ima go tease Lon'qu over how hot it is."

"Don't bother him too much!" I'm hooking my boots out of the stirrups as she says this, and it's with a rather timid tone, like she's afraid to tell me off. For the love of god, girl, I rely on you to tell me when I'm being stupid. I won't bug him that much.

Okay. Sun's to the south slightly, which means it's midday since we're north of the equator. (or so I assume.) This also means that Lon'qu's shadow is cast behind him, and he won't see the shadow of anyone creeping up on him.

Heh heh heh.

The sand makes it easier than usual to stealth; normally my heels clack against the floor hard. Sand, however, gives way more slowly, so it makes less noise because the force is spread out more...

Just a little bit more, and... "GET OFF, WOMAN!"

I have him pinned to the ground. Hee hee! "Hiii!" I dig my forehead into his back as a nuzzle. Oh dear Naga, he is_ soft_.

"H-how did you even sneak up on me," he stammers out. Oh, wow, I can feel his heartbeat, even through his back.

Why is he so adorabubble? "I'm just sneaky. And the sun's in your eyes..." Another nuzzle. "Mm, you are fun to hug." I'm chalking him onto my list of datable guys.

"OFF!" He screams frantically. "OFF, OFF, OFF!"

I grip him more tightly. "Oh my gosh, you're so soffft..."

"Shanzira, leave him alone."

That's a new voice. Nin? I look up at her while Lon'qu continues struggling beneath me. "No, I've never had this much fun hugging someone in forever."

Nin hesitates, then speaks up, a touch more firmness in her voice. "Imagine you're him. The thing he's most afraid of just attacked him. In your case, that's a bee, right?"

Oh dear Naga, I'm an idiot. I release him immediately, then slap my forehead hard. "Gods, what was I thinking?" If I _was_ thinking, it certainly wasn't with anything in the upper half of my body.

Lon'qu am-scrays while Nin gives me a flat stare. A very well-earned flat stare. I cover my face. "I'm sorry. That wasn't particularly nice of me, and I should have known better."

She nods slowly at me, never averting her eyes– and she's an aspie! Normally she doesn't stare people down this way. "I was having a conversation with him."

At this point, I just pull my hood over my face. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." But repetition won't be enough to earn forgiveness. Gods, that was so stupid of me.

Nineeyena turns and walks away, presumably to find Lon'qu again. I bash my head in with Noel's sketchbook, then briefly reflect: What would Noel say if she'd seen that?

"You saw them together, right?"

What?

I look up to see Eldrad, looking like he wants to start a conversation. "Pardon?"

He gestures in the direction Lon'qu and Nin went. "They're both really quiet, they might have something."

Oh. That's what he's talking about. Shipping. "Fuck."

He twists around while talking, almost more to himself than me, as I'm ignoring him. "I wonder how their supports go?"

"My."

"It seems weird, but I think they'd go well together."

"LIFE!" I finally scream.

Eldrad jumps and turns back to me. "What?" His voice shakes a little, too, like he's a little worried for my sanity.

With the intention of being campy, I belt into the dry, hot air: "I CAN'T ESCAPE THE MILES I MEAN SHIPPERS!"

I earn myself a few stares from Eldrad and the Shepherds who overheard that. The Shepherds shrug it off, probably figuring that it's Shanzira being Shanzira, but Eldrad's the one still staring at me. "You didn't have to scream so loudly," he says as though failing to comprehend the point of overdoing it.

I hunch slightly and droop my head despairingly. "Please! Stop freaking out over shipping every other minute!" (Mind, this is also mostly for theatrical purposes. For the love of god, I'm worse than Owain.)

Eldrad snorts at me. "Oh, come on. You play Fire Emblem–" here I furtively glance about to make sure no one could overhear– "you're a shipper."

"The only two pairings I ship are Elincia–Geoffrey and Chrom–Robin, the latter of which got sunk a few days back," I rebutt. Is rebutt a word? It is now. Still a little sore over that. NOW who's he going to marry?

Blink. "Wait, what?"

I raise my eyebrows at Eldrad's surprised expression. "You didn't hear? Robin told me that she and Chrom don't have anything for each other, and Robin's dating Gaius anyways."

"Gaius," he murmurs. "Didn't see that coming. Eh, never really like Chrom–Robin that much anyways." Then he adds with a chuckle, "at least you know how I feel."

Excuse me? "Pardon?" I'm not you, don't pretend I am.

"My OTP is Robin–Lucina," he clarifies.

I sneak another look around. "Dear gods, don't let Robin or Chrom figure out what that means." Actually, that would be a hilarious freakout, I almost want them to. At a later date, perhaps, but certainly not within the near future.

Eldrad waves me off. "I know, I'm not stupid."

I roll my neck around, feeling it growing stiff. The conversation hits a lull, and I glance around for a topic of discussion... or lack thereof. "Is it me, or is this area abnormally boring?"

"And really hot?" Oh, wow, I can hear him panting from here.

I scoff. "Wimp, Florida and Louisiana make this look pathetic." I went to Disneyworld once for two days, and I would sit, wipe the back of my leg, and watch sweat from it drip off my fingers. Yeah. It was hot. I mark it a personal achievement that I did not complain.

I quite enjoy Eldrad's indignant response: "I live in Canada!"

"Sucks to be you." I'm grinning, eyes drifting upwards to the unending clear blue sky.

"You were bitching while we were in Ferox!"

Did I mention I can't stand cold? "NO MORE! WHOO!"

"Fuck!" Now that's just general cursing at my obnoxious nature. "Wait, what the hell?" He's staring intently off somewhere, and there– ooh, boy! "Look!"

It's that one fight! The one where you meet the Grimleal! YES! I jump up, land, and twist around to climb atop Elincia, all the while screaming, "A DISTRACTION!" I swing my leg over Elincia's haunches and right my balance. With a somewhat badass air, I dig my heels into her sides and snap the reins.

"AAAHH!"

Oh, right, I forgot Shio was still there. Oops! "You okay, buddy?"

"Y–yeah," she stumbles. "Just... don't do that again." And she shudders again. Oh, damn, right, she has a slight fear of heights. I save her the condescending gesture of patting her and instead land Elincia by Robin, who probably really appreciated the FWUMP, judging from the relaxed, close-eyed smile on her face. "Fun?"

Robin looks at me while the rest of the lead group (Chrom, Frederick, them) notice me. "Aahh. That felt good, and we might even need you, Shanzira." Then she sobers up. "You've noticed the situation?"

I nod happily. "Yup. Anyways, are we jumping in or are we jumping in?"

Chrom looks back to the altercation. "We literally only just noticed them, but..."

I squint ahead so I can have an excuse to know details. "There's a little girl who needs saving," I nag. They don't call me the Nagmonster for nothing, but that's a tale for another time.

I see Frederick nod out of the corner of my eye, and his reluctance is so obvious that I saw it even with my peripheral vision. "She's right." Yeah, he probably disapproves of my silly, carefree nature. Suck it, tin man.

"Chrom?" At Robin's lead, we all look to our fearless leader.

He thinks for a second– seriously, just that long– and nods. "Very well, we'll help her. But Shanzira, don't call it fun– there's nothing fun about war."

IGNORING! NEED DISTRACTION! "WHEE!" I raise up my feet and–

"Shanzira, wait."

Gods damn it, Robin. I slowly let my feet rest by Elincia's side. "What?" I also take note of a sigh of relief behind me. Again, I forgot Shio was there.

Robin straightens up, entering tactician mode. "Let everyone else catch up. I'm going to have you fly eastward a little to visit those villages, and I want you to monitor the battle from the air and assist if necessary."

Awwww.

"Uh, okay." I twist around to my left, since I know my cardinal directions. Well, that is what I always did, gave the pegasus knights village duty. "Why can't Nineeyena do this?" I wanna meet Nowi!

"She's still inexperienced," Robin explains. "I'm keeping her with Lon'qu for now, he can show her the ropes."

I lean back to Shio and whisper: "Or more of give her a sweet speed boost." Hnnng, Lon'qu's a fucking blessing to fight with. Nin, you lucky bitch.

Shio gives it a bit of thought. "Well, Lon'qu HAS been doing this for a while."

One of these things is not like the ooother! "Nin wields tomes, Lon'qu wields swords. Exactly what do they have in common?"

After a moment of hesitation, Shio changes tack. "Conquer Lon'qu's fear of women while giving Nin some experience."

All right, I concede that. "This is why I suck as a tactician," I grumble. "I never notice these things." I look around and dig my heels in to find the village– "Oh look, enemies."

"I got it," Shio murmurs, then they all drop dead after a few words. God damn it... Well, I guess she needed the experience. Fwump, fwump. Sand parts as Elincia touches down, and I dismount, because fuck if Shio can hold a conversation with a stranger. She's not good with people.

Anyways, I find the first villager I see and tell him to get the village gates closed. He straightens up (he was hunched previously) and sighs in palpable relief. "Many thanks, young lady! By chance, do you mean to fight the Grimleal?"

I puff up proudly and point to myself. "I'm just the soldier who was sent to warn y'all. But if I can join the battle, I'll make sure none of 'em even get to here, I promise." I probably need to be a bit taller and stockier to do that archetype, but it works, because the guy dumps a pretty nice lance onto me and I march off with it.

Anyways, after mounting, I take Elincia high into the sky, where it's nice and coooool. No enemies nearby, so I just look over at the mess going on with the Shepherds.

Let's practice my skills at sports narration.

"A beautiful blow on the part of Gaius; for being such a sneaky thief, he's quite a show-off! Ah, wait, right behind him is Robin, showing him up with a fantastic shower of sparks! I sure don't envy that cavalier, he just got disabled from the waist down. Over with our own cavalry, Stahl and Sully might be struggling with the sand, but their skill with weapons is no less than it normally is! Just watch Sully toss that javel– oohh, a miss, but it was just close enough for Virion to shoot the axeman while he was recovering from his dodge!"

This is sounding more like something else, I can't figure out what. But judging from the sound behind me, I'm still achieving the purpose of being funny, because Shio's laughing pretty hard.

I clear my throat and resume. "AAAAND CHROM LANDS A CRITICAL! OH, I DON'T ENVY THAT MYRMIDON. OH, WAIT, NOWI SHOWS HER TRUE COLORS AND TURNS INTO A DRAGON! JUST LOOK AT ROBIN'S FACE, THAT EXQUISITE STATE OF 'WHAT THE FUCK'!"

Between guffaws, Shio ekes, "Oh my god... Shanz... stoppit!"

I afford her one glance before continuing. "No, this is too fun. OOH! LOOKS LIKE RICKEN JUST TOOK A BAD HIT- WAIT! WE HAVE MARIBELLE WITH SOME STAFF ACTION AND HE'S BACK AT A HUNDRED PERCENT! SPEAKING OF HEALERS, LOOK AT ANNA GO! BASHING PEOPLE'S HEADS IN WITH A MEND STAFF JUST FOR THE HELL OF IT! OH, WAIT, LOOK! A CAVALIER- AND SHE BREAKS OUT HER SWORD AND BIFURCATES HIM. AND THAT, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, IS ANNA." I lower my voice; it's starting to dry out and I don't have much water. "And if I'm not wrong, there's Eldrad over there, flailing like an idiot with dyspraxia. Oh wait, he IS one of those. Heheh."

"This is getting mean," Shio mumbles.

"Still fun." Still grinning. "Oh, wait a shiz–" that's Robin waving at me and pointing south, I know what she wants. "'KAY!" She probably didn't hear that bellow, but I mumble "village visit" to Shio and turn southward.

It's a shorter visit, but I'm actually given a money reward instead of a second seal or master seal. (I remember the game script way too well.) Well, hey, it's nice to see we're paid for our services. Elincia kicks off into the air again, and I get a view of red sands. Looks like most of the Grimleal are down. I smile and fly a little close to the Shepherds, still observing.

Let's see, there's the boss, there's a dark mage, and that one myrmidon douchebag with the killing edge. And... a guy in a cloak? The fu– Oh, he just backstabbed the killing edge myrmidon.

I signal to Robin, asking for a closer look. She gives me the ok, a simple thumbs-up. "Mmkay, Elincia." Heels smoothly meet flanks, and she descends a little further.

I can actually hear what's going on.

The cloaked dude slides the myrmidon corpse off his sword and faces the boss. "Hello... Chalard, was it?"

Wow, he's good at names, so unlike me.

Chalard stares at him. "You... you said you would help us!" Good god, that's an ugly sneer. The cloaked guy can't kill him soon enough.

He tilts his head to the side– I only catch the motion; his face is hidden by his hood. "I lied. I'm a tactician, not one of you." Wh– that sentence got punctuated with a... hiccup? "Woop."

And he's wearing a tactician's coat!

Chalard reels in disgust. "You're just a drunkard!"

The cloaked guy straightens out, and from his voice, he's got to be smiling. "A _clever_ drunkard! Now, it's about time I had me some roasted Grimleal." He extracts a tome from the folds of his cloak– Yes, he's a tactician!– and flips it open. Two seconds later, the resulting Arcfire clears into smoke and dust, and he closes the book again.

I land just in time to hear Robin murmur as though drooling: "That could be useful..."

Meanwhile, the brightest damn smile's appeared on my face. "I like this guy!"

Chrom rushes up, panting– probably due to both heat and exhaustion from trudging through sand– "Halt! Who are you?"

Upon noticing Chrom, the cloaked guy jumps. "Woops! Gotta go, see you later!" He throws something to the ground– THE FUCK, WAS THAT A SMOKE BOMB?!

COUGH!

And then relief as Ricken blows it all away. Thank the gods for wind mages. I wipe my face and look: The guy went and disappeared.

"Damn it," Chrom curses.

_"Sugoi,"_ I whisper, entirely aware of its noobish connotation.

Eldrad steps next to me, looks up, and takes a step back. "Oh, god. There are sparkles in your eyes."

That breaks me out of my reverie; I look down to him. Heh, he's so short down there. "Where'd you come from?"

He wipes the blood off his sword with a dry rag. "I came to see who our mysterious helper is."

I look in the probable direction he went in. "Total badass, right?" I swear his tone of voice, he was trying to imitate Vegeta (specifically, the TFS abridged version).

Eldrad tilts his head a little. "Eh, not really." I snort.

"Wow, he was cooooool!"

And there she is. _There she is._ The little force of nature. Our green-haired, draconic princess: Nowi.

"Outvoted!" I cheer happily. "Speaking of cool, hiya there!"

"Hi!" Wow, she could kick my ass in cheerfulness! "Were you helping to kill the bad guys?"

"Eh," my head tilts sideways as I consider how to put this, "sort of." I got literally no action, it was all Shio. "I'm Shanz, you?"

With gusto: "Nowi!"

I widen my eyes and go for the joke: "No way!"

I notice Eldrad raise up his arms in an "I'm done" gesture. "Oh gods no." He gets the heck out of dodge, by which I mean he gets the hell away from this conversation.

Nowi snorts. "What's his problem?" She folds her arms.

I shrug, still smiling. "Too much energy for him to handle." My voice drops to a whisper. "He's a wimp."

Nowi giggles. "Wanna play tag?"

Oh hell no. "Later, I gotta rest. I just fought a battle." That excuse can get you out of anything.

Nowi waves, chirps, and runs off. Here's what she said, I only worked it out after she left: "OKAYSEEYOU!"

"I think," Robin groans, "we've just found a new headache."

I maintain a shit-eating grin, even though I entirely agree with her. I'm so boned, I practically promised to play tag with her.

"On the other hand," Chrom muses, "she's a manakete. She would make a strong ally... But..."

Regardless of future hell, I pipe up again. "Can we keep her?"

"Aye." WHOA! And now Gregor's joined the ninja club. "Gregor agrees with redheaded girl. Gregor has business proposition: You hire Gregor and he stay with little dragon girl. Good?"

Chrom's quiet for a moment, taking this in. "I suppose. All right, Gregor, you're with us."

"Whoohoo!" That was me! Anyways, yeah, we have fun time now, right? ... Except, I'm realizing now... "Battle's over... And it's back to marching."

"Yup," Robin affirms.

"I'm going to be so bored."

* * *

**Time to build up hype.**

**Next chapter is my FAVORITE. Without a doubt. I don't foresee any chapter being able to be any more AWESOME than it, I'm seriously looking forward to writing it. I got all of the prose of this chapter done in one sitting just to get it out of the way. So why am I so excited about it? IT'S THE REVEAL OF DREAMER NUMBER SIX.**

**GO, MY LOYAL MINIONS! UM, FANS! IS THERE EVEN A DIFFERENCE ANYMORE?! ANYWAYS, GO NOW, AND SPECULATE! SPECULATE OVER DREAMER NUMBER SIX AND WHAT HE WILL BE LIKE! KNOWN FACTS: HE IS MALE, HE CAN MARRY ANYONE IN THE FIRST GENERATION OF THE OPPOSITE GENDER, AND LAMBY HAS GONE TO SUSPICIOUS PAINS TO KEEP HIS DETAILS SECRET. We don't know his name, appearance, or choice of weapon! We don't know how he's tied into the whole mess, either! We don't know who he marries, either! GO GO GO!**


	25. The Dinrel Twins

**Author's notes: HERE IT IS, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN: THE CHAPTER I'VE BEEN WAITING SO LONG FOR. I've revised the concept for this one countless times; it was a thing to look forward to even back in the days of that fic I don't talk about anymore. This. Is. The reveal OF... Dreamer number six.**

**Why do I love this chapter so much? BECAUSE IT'S A WONDERFUL OPPORTUNITY TO TROLL PEOPLE.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Boink, boink, boink...

Tromp, tromp, tromp...

Uh...

Ploff, ploff, ploff...

What am I doing? I'm trying to come up with an onomatopoeia for hooves sinking into sand. Ploff seems to be closest; I only did boink for giggles.

I am that bored.

There's nothing to see but sand and sky. We can't even see castle Plegia, unless that _isn't_ a mirage in the distance. There isn't a cloud which decides to be so bold as to shade the poor saps who are dying of heat. Me? The large droplets I'm wiping off my forehead do not mean I'm uncomfortable. Or at least, if I am, I can't tell at all.

I let out a yaaawwwn. "If I were on the ground instead of on a beautiful flying horse, I would be in a lot of pain right now." This is called teasing, because Eldrad and Welsh are nearby and they have the most _magnificent_ responses to it:

"Lucky bitch." And that was in perfect unison. I have the best friends.

I lean forward, careful not to burden Elincia's neck. "Oh? What's wroooong, boooys?" While I'm at it, I puff out my chest and bend my back forward, with the intent of showing off my assets.

I can't see Welsh flush or anything, he's not even looking. "You're just being you!" Ahh, how I do so love that pitch. Whenever he's annoyed like that, his voice goes up quite a few notches and it sounds like he's constipated.

Eldrad, on the other hand, blushes very palpably. As he turns away, he hands me his response: "Could you be a little less obnoxious?"

I grin evilly and rest my right hand on the corresponding hip. "Nah."

"Ooh!" Oh, Nowi. It's odd, the _guys_ surprise the hell out of me, yet she doesn't really get me to jump at all. "If I had a kid, I would totally name it that!"

Dear Naga, I'm the inspiration for Nah's name. YES! Brightened considerably by this thought, I grin (in the shit-eating style). "Hiya, Nowi!"

She looks up at me and hops onto Elincia (without pissing her off, quite a feat). "Hiya, Shanzy!" She proceeds to choke me in a bear hug; to get her off, I just ruffle her hair. She promptly lets go to finger-comb it back into shape.

"So whatcha doin' with us squirts?" I give her a hug as well, a gentler one by one hell of an exponent.

Down on the ground, I hear Eldrad grumble. Something about my stupid yank accent. No decent response comes to mind, so I ignore it while Nowi pipes up. "I wanted to see if you could play with me for a bit!"

I'm so screwed. "Sure thing. Here, Eldrad, watch Elincia." Sand flies as my boots kick it up, marking my landing off of Elincia's back.

Our friendly, helpful Scot turns away the reins without hesitation. "That thing kicked me in the face, I'm not guiding it."

I turn to Welsh. "Then it's your turn. Here you go!"

He hides his hands behind his back immediately, and squawks at the highest indignant pitch he can manage: "What?! NO!" (He's in charge of hamming things up around here.)

I turn to Nowi. Maybe I'm not so screwed. "Well, Nowi, if I can't get someone to watch Elincia, I'm afraid I can't play."

Her face is better at exaggerating emotions than even my own; I don't think my crestfallen puppy eyes are that good. "Aww... Can't you make them?" Thankfully, I'm good at ignoring guilt trips.

I don't even have to ignore it anyways, because I have a strategy. "I'd rather not, because then they'd be pissed at me for quite some time. Elincia doesn't like them very much."

Nowi keeps frowning for a bit, then nods, seeming to get over it. "Okay." She hops off Elincia now. "I'll just find someone else!" And then she runs off, kicking sand everywhere.

"Thank god she's gone." That was Eldrad, and his haste to let his relief out makes me wonder if manakete ears have a longer range than human ears. Either way, I swing myself back into Elincia's saddle.

"Did you actually _want_ to play with her?" Aaaand Welsh is looking at me like I'm crazy. Truthfully, I'm not sure of my own sanity, either, but that's a long-known fact.

I raise my shoulders up, so as to make myself small. "A little bit."

His eyes widen and his eyebrows press down, making them appear to bulge. "What the hell is _wrong_ with you?!"

I smile nervously and shrug. "I'm bored of sitting on Elincia all day, and I need to get my blood flowing." And by all day, I really _do_ mean hours. It's been a long march.

Eldrad sighs. I bet a lot of moisture just went out through his mouth. "Yeah, that would do it..." He raises his arms up in a stretch. "It's almost dark; isn't it about time to stop soon?"

I glance around the empty landscape (Well, empty but for an aforementioned mirage to the south). "Strikes me as being dumb to camp out in the open."

Eldrad stands quietly, still surveying the horizon. Then he snaps his fingers, all "eureka" style. "I have an idea." Kicking up sand into our faces, he runs up to the front.

Welsh and I exchange two things: Glances and shrugs. "Wanna lift?"

"I wouldn't go near that thing with a ten-foot pole," he answers warily.

"Your loss. Ima see what Eldrad's doing."

FWUMP.

* * *

Wow, that blip to the south which I thought was a mirage? Turns out it _wasn't._

Trufax. Eldrad confirmed it, he's actually been here before. These are the ruins he found his OP shield in, so we're making camp in them. Everyone's relieved to have a roof over our head so we won't be exposed to the elements.

So naturally, all the tents are already up and people are lazing about, except those lucky few who were on mounts or just still have energy to spare.

Like me!

I've been running around camp and keeping an eye out for any sparklies that might be lying around. Nowi's already gone off into the deep end (heh) and Naga knows when she'll be back.

I should probably go bring her back, huh.

I make for the edge of camp so as to start my search, but this happens: Gregor calls me out, apparently wanting to start a conversation.

"Oy! Redheaded girl. Shanzira, yes? Gregor notice to walk like delicate dancer and yet also hunch like tired farmer."

He's grossly exaggerating, but that is a bit of my gait. "What of it?"

He leans back onto nothing (yeah, he's sitting). "It seems to Gregor that Shanzira is always fearful of everyone. Perhaps there is problem with her?"

I dunno, is there? "I'm just really sensitive about my strong points, so I try really hard to hide any hubris unless it's an obvious joke."

"Ah." And he leans forward again, interested. "Is strategy: Shanzira lets other people think little of her so she can surprise them later. Sound strategy! Nothing more impressive than beautiful woman who can fight like demon."

Is he hitting on me? Well, no, he's not the sort of person to do that. He hands out praise and asks for nothing in return. He's actually kinda nice, now that I think about it. But sometimes it steps into the realm of creepy... like now.

I say this modestly, not sharply: "Then maybe you ought to be staring at the other girls in the camp, I'm still new to this. There are plenty of others."

Gregor's response is to grin, eyebrows raised. "Oho! Even Shanzira underestimates herself! Gregor thinks she hides her potential."

"Sure, sure." At this point I just want to get away and track down Nowi. "See you." My feet meet the stone floor at a brisk pace as I put some distance between he and I. While I'm at it, I bump into my best friend. "Oh, hey, Shio. I'm gonna go find Nowi, she ran off to look for sparklies. Wanna come with?"

Shio just yawns. "Sorry, no... I'm really tired."

I shrug. "Mmk. Sleep well." Besides, I'm using this as an opportunity to find shiny things as well, so it's her loss. So I keep a good eye out for these things.

And then I got distracted by architecture. I mean, damn, this place is impressive. It's /huge/. There are these really nice statues of gods-know-who, but the markings ring a bell- they belong to both the Grimleal AND the followers of Naga. I walk by a huge piece of art which seems to tell a story of the two dragons, always at war, with humans suffering in the interim.

Impressive and all that, but our army needs funds and weapons. I walk on.

I'm examining an old sword when I hear something. Something like a voice, singing.

This is not Radiant Dawn, there are no herons. However, the tune sure isn't a galdr, it's familiar... I start to hum it, lo and behold it perfectly matches.

But then the music changes- there's synthesized stuff in there, too. What?

I bolt in the direction of the song. It gets clearer, and I recognize it- it's a track from Blazblue, Nu's theme. I run into the room it's coming from and find a guy digging around in piles of sand- he's got curly red hair and he's wearing my coat. And just a few feet away sits a fucking stereo, an iPod touch plugged in.

"Holy shit!"

Sorry, I was so surprised I couldn't contain it. The guy immediately stands and stares, deer-headlights like. "Oh, shit, there are other people in here?!"

I repeat myself, because this guy looks like he could be my twin: "HOLY **_SHIT!_**"

He hunches over to the stereo, hastily stammering, "it's just a-"

IMMEDIATE INTERRUPTION IN THE FORM OF A SQUEE: "SOMEONE BROUGHT A BOOM BOX TO THIS WORLD!"

He slowly stands back up, the music still playing. "So... I take it you've been living half here, too."

I nod, really interested in whoever this douchebag is. "Yeah, for over a month now. How the hell did you bring that thing?"

He squats back down and turns it so the back faces me, revealing thick leather straps. "I put those there so I could carry it like a backpack. Had this since high school, and I was wearing it when I first started dreaming here." He follows this up with a shrug. "So naturally, I woke up again with a bloody nose."

OH NAGA. I just imagined a nasty face plant... That had to hurt. "People must've freaked."

He nods slowly, off to the side. "Yeaaahh... My roommate wasn't happy. Anyways!" He straightens up. "We missed introductions. You are...?"

I straighten myself out, having relaxed to listen. "Name's Shanzira, at least it is in this world. Accidentally blurted that instead of my name, and given the hot water I was in, I wasn't about to correct myself. I had Frederick staring me down."

Mr. Redhead makes an o with his mouth. "Huh. How'd you pick that name?"

Pardon? "It's an OC of mine..." I shrug, slightly embarrassed. "I liked the name, so I stuck with it. What's yours?"

"Well," he murmurs, "if you're going by an alias, I'll do the same. Call me Storm, it's the name my parents nearly named me at birth."

Judging from that sly look in his eyes, this isn't coincidence. "Odd. My parents nearly chose that, too, then dad backed out because he was worried it'd be a self-fulfilling prophecy."

Storm gawks. "Who the hell ARE you?"

I know he asked that for its rhetoric value, but I give him a serious answer. First, I clear my throat, then I give him crisp diction so he won't ask me to clarify: "A student of game art design in a somewhat obscure college in California, who really loves to draw and was attracted by the sound of Blazblue."

He blinks. "You just described me to a tee, but replaced "composing" with "drawing".

There's only one explanation for this. "Alternate universes, huh." I don't think we need to compare the other details of our lives; the odds of two people being so alike, even down to appearance, is pretty much nil... If they originate in the same universe. But with alternate timelines and stuff, it becomes far more probable, if not guaranteed.

He comes to the same conclusion as me, as he nods in apparent comprehension. "So you're from a world where I'm a girl."

I try to ignore where his eyes are drifting (a little too far south of my face) and try to distract him with my voice. "Suppose so. Anyways, whatcha checking out in here?"

"Uh," he stammers, caught in the act. "Was looking for spoils. I found a few weapons, over there-" he points to the far end of the chamber, where some nice shiny pointy things are enshrined- "but I'm pretty certain blah blah trap bluh-blah blah."

"That would be so cliched," I murmur, trying to appear focused. That coat looks really nice with those jeans, and that face, it's so smooth, very well-shaven, with the shiniest brown eyes. And those boots... They're definitely not the girly ones I have, but look like boots one would actually wear in medieval days, and they're still sexy.

Actually, that last word describes this guy in general, particularly his legs. I mean, damn.

"Blah blih blah fucking story. Blah, blah, blablah bluh-blah bluh trip it anyways."

Wait what the hell is he doing?! STOPIT YOU IDIOT-

He stumbles as a tile sinks in, a shiny orb on the wall way in the distance glows purple, and Risen appear all around us. All revenants and entombed. Well, downside is we're surrounded; upside is if we survive, we walk away with serious experience points.

"Well fuck." That was him, not me. "All revenants and entombed. I'm at a low level, you?" He's standing at my back– oh dear Naga we're doing the back-to-back badasses thing. I pull out my Arcthunder, because this doesn't really allow a lot of room for stabbing.

"Already promoted," I answer. "You have a weapon?" We're doing that thing where we constantly look over our shoulders to talk to each other. This is so campy.

"Spear and a couple of thunder tomes." That didn't sound too confident.

I consider. "I got a steel spear if you want it, but the only tome I have is Arcthunder. Take it or leave it." I offer the spear for him to take; he swipes it.

Excellent.

The boom box begins playing Imperial Code; I poke Storm's shoulder. "These guys are slow. Let's just rush them and slaughter them."

"Yes, ma'am," he says, shifting accordingly. "Wait a minute. There's something at the entrance."

I look over– we're saved. It's Chrom and company. "Hey, boss! A little bit of help?"

He sees us amidst the sea of the undead, then waves him arm for the Shepherds to follow, almost frantic. "WE'RE COMING! JUST HOLD ON UNTIL WE CAN REACH YOU!"

I grin as the metal sets in. "No problem, boss!" I look at Storm and elbow him for his attention. "Let's cut us some undead flesh!"

Just after we've struck down two risen, I hear two "oh my god"s of different tones– one laughing, the other embarrassed. They're both masculine; I'd say the amused one was Welsh while Eldrad's embarrassed.

This is followed by "wh– oh"s. THAT would be Nin and Shio. I zap a risen in the way and behold the four of them staring in awe. Well, no. They're staring in disbelief, and it's the exact same face Robin had yesterday when she saw Nowi transform.

After the pause, Welsh shouts happily, "I'm game! HEY PLAY TAO'S THEME!"

He means Catus Carnival. Oh dear gods, if I can get to the stereo, I'm doing that. The other four dreamers then have a whole mess– while fighting, mind– over what the hell's going on. In the end, Shio's the one who tells them to focus on killing shit.

The next song which plays isn't Welsh's hope, Catus Carnival, but something faster: Condemnation Wings. "YES!" I scream. Apparently Storm shuffles his music like I do. Anyways, the style Storm and I use is like this: I paralyze them, and he finishes with stabs. And since these things are pretty much punching bags, they fall like sacks of potatoes. Sure, a few claws come near our faces, but they never actually hit us.

Either the music's pumping us up or distracting them. I don't know; I don't care. I just know we're being badasses. This in mind, I pick the stereo up and put it on my back. Oooogh, this is gonna suck.

It's a real mess. I don't know how to describe it. We kill one, turn around, find two. We split to kill them, turn back and reunite, we're surrounded again. We charge, get scratched, but make it out relatively alright. Then we turn, rinse, and repeat.

Perhaps not repeating, but it's just stabbing and bolting... and running. I sound bored, but my heart's pumping hard.

Wow, remember back when I would've been in panic mode? Damn, I've grown stamina. Storm, on the other hand, isn't doing so well; he's bent over half the time and I have to literally grab his hood and pull him up. He immediately apologizes between gasps, and sometimes even begs to swap weapons. Buuuut this is how to make him stronger, so I refuse.

But yeah, after a while of that, we've cut a swath to the Shepherds and reunited with 'em. "Hey, boss," I pant. Storm just flat out collapses; I use one foot to nudge him away from the fight.

Chrom looks at me, then Storm, then Storm's boom box (which is still on my back). "What in the seven hells is that thing?"

The answer comes from Storm in the form of a weak pant: "It uses magic... to play music... of a rather unique sort."

I shrug at Chrom. "Details later, I assume." I take the damn thing off and place it beside Storm, and gaaaawwwds I'm so happy to be rid of that weight.

Storm fumbles to stop the music just as the screaming dies down, the Shepherds having finished their work.

"Well," I sigh. "He said there's some good stuff on the other side of the chamber, and I believe we can waltz over there and grab it, now that we've defeated the trap guarding it."

Robin eyes the room curiously. "Good stuff?"

I shrug. "Weapons, gold. This IS the place where Eldrad found his shield."

"It is," and Eldrad himself affirms this. "I didn't find this room, though."

The next participant of the conversation is Storm; we all look down as he gasps words out between breaths. "I did... found some sweet regalia... Weapons for the lot of us."

I look up and smile at Robin. "We're gonna need that, ain't we? We ARE goin' off to save Emm."

Robin nods. "Chrom? We should take the weapons. In the meantime," she looks back to Storm again, "who are you?"

He gets up, with some apparent effort, and dusts his coat off. "Call me... Storm, ma'am. Shanzira here's my sis... I've been looking for her for years. Glad to have found her at last."

I smile. This is a bullshit story I can run with. "Chrom?" Robin looks to the boss again.

Chrom clears his throat. "I am prince Chrom of Ylisse, and we're on a mission to rescue my sister, the Exalt. And..." His voice grows ginger, due to confusion. "What is that contraption you have?"

Call me crazy, but is that relief in his voice? I mean, prior to the befuddlement.

Storm bends down to pick it up, then leaves it there because he doesn't yet have the strength to lug it again. "It's a music box, runs on magic. I picked it up on my travels, and while it's precious to me, I can't remember for the life of me where I found it. I just know how to work it."

Suuuure. Well, Chrom buys this, actually; the suspicion is just because I seriously doubt he'd forget acquiring his boom box. "Perhaps you might like to join us? Your sister, Shanzira, is a member of the Shepherds; if you would like to march with us, we'd be happy to have you."

Storm puffs up... something about his torso makes me want to squeeze him. "I'd be proud to, sir."

"Yaaaay," I cheer weakly. "Maybe the march won't be so boring now. We've got music." I hug Storm for this, for being so bold as to have a damn stereo.

"So," Storm looks over the other four dreamers, who are coming over as Chrom and Robin go off to examine the regalia Storm pointed out. "Six of us in all. Nin, Shanz..." He pauses at Eldrad. "I can't say I know you."

He shrugs. "Eldrad. They're Shio and Welsh."

Auburn eyebrows drift towards the ceiling. "So we all have codenames? Alright, then. Six dreamers, and a hell of a stage set for an epic tale."

Eldrad's the one who takes the needle to balloon. "This isn't a dream. It's reality."

With a stretch and a yawn, Storm waves him off. "A damn sweet reality. Much better than running across desert and hiding from Grimleal all day."

There's a pause, then Eldrad groans. "Right, now there's two of you." Aaaand there he goes, having decided this conversation was too weird to suffer through.

"Hiding from Grimleal?" Shio repeats, curious. "Why?"

There's a bit of fabric swishing around as Storm tries to find a decent spot of his– my– our– ok his was better– cloak to use as an example; after a while of tangling himself up, he settles with the eye markings on his right sleeve. "They think I'm one of them. While that's a great chance to stab them in the back, I'd rather not have them all _hunting_ me instead of merely trying to befriend me."

That rings a bell. "So you're not the guy who backstabbed them yesterday." My mind brings up images of that totally_ badass_ guy with the Arcfire tome. Oh, wait– Storm has shit tomes, no arcfire, and he wields spears instead of swords."

Confused, he shakes his head. "What happened yesterday?"

"Long story short–" I blink in surprise; this was Shio who answered– "We recruited Nowi and Gregor, and this guy in a hood finished off the boss and then threw a smoke bomb to escape from us." Well, you can know someone for years and still be surprised every now and then.

There's a bit of a silence until Storm breaks it (OH SHIT, THAT WAS A PUN! I slap myself for thinking that) "That's... foreboding, to say the least." Well, the way Shio told it _does_ bring up the realization that he had to escape us. Makes one wonder.

"Let's just all hit the hay." This is a ton of stuff to digest, we don't need more. Everyone agrees and disperses, except Storm, who hangs around me. "What?"

"I don't know where I'm supposed to sleep," he squeaks.

"Ask Robin, she's over there with Chrom."

He looks in the direction he sent them, which is where that wonderful weapons cache is, then trots off. I, meanwhile, make for my damn tent and plop myself down.

It's a little while before I fall asleep, but it happens.

* * *

"You're up bright and early," Mom says as I bounce out of my room.

"I had a really good night's sleep!" I smile at her and stifle a yawn. Arright, I wonder if there are cinnamon rolls to make?

* * *

**To the guest who said "it's her brother": Only technically. Seriously, I hate my brother; why would I throw him into my SI? To everyone else who's been making random guesses: I'm not throwing in characters from other works or anything, I'm sticking with people I know. And Storm's me, right? I know him damn well.**

**I hope you guys enjoyed this one, it was really fun to write! Now I just have Emmeryn's whole mess to deal with. In other news, almost 100 followers! Darn, and I still haven't accrued enough characters to do that reward I kept mentioning before. Maybe I'll take a slight break to work on supports? I dunno. Anyways, keep reading! I love you all!**


	26. All Cascades

**ARGH. Stupid school internet, farting while I'm trying to post things. I'm not going to bother editing this one, it was painful enough to write. 10,000 words! SUCK IT G2G, YOU CAN'T EVER HAVE THAT AWESOME OF A WORDCOUNT. Yeah, this one's a beast.**

**Enjoy it, as always!**

* * *

Welp, I've gathered everyone in Shio's tent... This is pretty important business. Everyone's leaning in, wanting to know how this meeting's gonna go, particularly Storm, since he looks pretty confused.

Someone has _got_ to keep him in the loop, I swear. I'll get Shio to do it if I have to... Then again, Shio's pretty forgetful. Probably going to end up being me, he is my, um... self?

Damn, Storm is a hell of a puzzle. And he's me.

"Okay," I figure I should stop with the reflecting and get this crap under way. "We all know what's going down tomorrow, and exactly how it goes down without our interference." This is calm and businesslike.

"Wait." Comprehension rises into Storm's face, causing his posture to improve a little. "It's already time for Emmeryn's execution?"

I try not to sigh; I'm definitely going to end up being the one to keep him in the loop. "Yes. Anyways, we're left with a question: Should we interfere to save her, or just do as we're told?" I glance around at my fellow dreamers. "Each of you, weigh in."

It's a hell of a question. It's not just logic and tactics that are involved here, it's also a huge question of morality and philosophy. You'd thank that'd be right up my alley, but I'm nulling my vote so we don't have a chance of ending up with an even split. And let's face it, the whole philosophy business is a _headache_. Yeah, I'm good at it, but it's stolen way too many hours of sleep from me in the past.

It's also stolen way too many hours of daylight recently. I've been trying to put this one off on purpose.

Anyways, the silence that follows my question is appropriately short, because everyone else already worked it out. Eldrad responds first, from the logic-tactical point of view:

"I'd love to save her, but if we do, we end up extending the Ylisse-Plegia war." Yup. Eyes floating up in thought, he continues. "And later, when the Valm invasion happens, she's try to diplomacy friggin' _Walhart_, which we know is a bad idea."

Uh, correction, Welsh isn't aware that it's a dumb idea, because he never played too far and he's still fuzzy. (He doesn't question it, however, for which I'm grateful.) Nin's been taking notes on her game, so she's up to speed. ... Enough.

"Hm," Shio hums. She decides to take the view of morale (not morality). "On the other hand, wouldn't it be better for Ylisse to save Emmeryn? She knows more about ruling a country than Chrom. I vote we save her."

Yeah, except Ylisse loses more soldiers because the war len– no, _Ferox_ loses soldiers. Ylisse has no military, barring the Shepherds and pegasus knights. But that fucks things over even more when Valm invades. Hm.

"I don't really care," yawns Welsh, as though he's _trying_ to be as nonchalant as possible.

Little cheater. Great way to get out of having to think, and also a great way to screw us over in the event of an even split. THANKS, WELSH.

My next comment reflects this in tone alone: "You should, because if we extend the war, that means more opportunities for _you_ to die." You know, if you take out my selection of stressed words and ignore the sharp irritation with which I said that, that almost sound innocuous. Almost.

He shrugs at me, assuming the "T" face. "I have another life, I'm not complaining."

Auuggghh. Getting him to feel any strong emotion (that cannot be described with a simple "NOPE") is almost impossible. That, or he just doesn't like me and tries to shove me away.

That hurts. I really hope that isn't so, he's one of my most valued friends. I really missed him in middle school... Back on topic.

"Welsh," I glance at Eldrad in surprise; I hadn't seen this coming, "we _all_ know what you want to keep in this life." Huh? Wait, I don't get it, how is fighting for your life every few days better than going to school or working a job? What does Welsh have here that he'd want to keep?

Wait, is it that–

"Shut up!"

Aaaand my thought process is interrupted by his indignant squawk. Hah, just kidding; sound doesn't bother me that much. I just didn't want to fin... Aw, hell. Here's my conclusion: He has a _giiiiirrrlfriend._

I will kindly refrain from the gratuitous teasing.

"Um." Oh, Nin. Right, if it wasn't for that timid squeak, I nearly would've forgotten about her. Yes, she is that shy sometimes... Given that we're all friends, though, she shouldn't be. "Is it my turn?"

I whistle at the boys. "HUSH!" They finally quiet down with the embarrassed squawking– I swear we have a bunch of griffons in here– and I invite Ninny to continue.

She clears her throat. "We let Emmeryn die. I'm sorry about Chrom and Lissa, but too many good things happen as a result of it. What made all the difference is the manner of her death; it's better than letting someone kill her further down the road."

Oh, yeah. That was another good part of it, you didn't have everyone trying to friggin' kill her.

"Gods, that's cold." Storm's taking his turn, now, being last (as always). "Um... Well," I swear to god he's making this up as he's going, "if there was a middle-of-the-road approach, I'd take that. Like, let everyone think she's dead, then reveal later, OH YEAH SHE'S ALIVE, BITCHES!"

While that would achieve the perfect outcome, I have to burst his bubble. "Storm, we're not in a position to pull that." I can't think of any means to save her, and I'm pretty damn creative. I mean, Elincia's fast, but I can't just fly by and swipe her; we already have a bazillion archers there and I'm not crazy enough to think my luck is that good. I mean, I'm a friggin' lucky bitch, but I don't want to bet my life on something that risky.

... Wow, how selfish, I'm putting my life above Emm's? No, this whole scenario is dumb, we're debating whether she should live or die, as if we're some sort of all-knowing arbiters. How... Arrogant. It's not the word I'm looking for, though.

Storm scratches the back of his head, sighing. "Yeah, I know. I sure wish we were. Um... yeah," he appears to be racking his brains, "we're best off letting her die. I don't think we _could_ save her, anyhow."

We probably should have debated that question first, whether or not we could. But it's obvious that with what we have, we can't. We'd have to wipe out all those archers in one fell swoop, or otherwise catch Emm mid-fall with a faster mount, or just snipe Gangrel. And none of us are snipers or have mounts that fast. And arcthunder is sadly only meant for use on single individuals or pairs, perhaps even trios, but certainly not huge groups like that. No, we'd have to have Iote's Shield or something.

We're not even high enough of a level to grab it, anyways. And there hasn't been a single chance to visit the Outrealms.

"Well, it's settled, then. We just follow orders tomorrow," I conclude. A dreading silence descends upon the occupants of the tent... Probably as we force ourselves to come to terms with our decision.

"Okay," Shio sighs, almost hiccuping.

"I'm not going to enjoy the aftermath," Storm mumbles.

Oh dear shit, that's right. Gotta bear in mind Chrom's roaring rampage of revenge. And out of the six of us, I'm the most likely to bumble into his path like an idiot. Why? Because shut up. Shut up is why. More seriously, who was it he went after when Sumia died? Yeah. Me.

This ain't gonna be fun.

"Suck it up." If Storm wasn't me, I would brand him psychic. He probably figured out what I was thinking from my face.

Sooo, "I know."

Now I hear a bunch of whispers. "I almost ship them now."

"There's one question I'm trying to figure out– is it self-cest or incest?"

Okay, there's only one response to that, and it's this: "WILL YOU SHUT UP?"

In perfect unison, of course!

Welsh laughs and walks out. "Ima go train."

I hold a blank face and try to invent an excuse to get the heck out. "I'd better go find Robin and concoct an excuse that'll justify us not doing anything to save Emm."

"Want some help?" Storm offers, a dumb smile on his face.

"Um, no." Idiot, we're trying to sink this ship, not make it shippable. Gods.

"Okay." Storm sees my face and wonders what the hell he's doing wrong.

I can be _so_ dense sometimes.

Seriously, back before I actually worked on developing insight, I was the most dense little idiot you ever met. What actually started it was when–

Actually, that's a secret, and it's not my own. Gotta hitch a different train of though. Ummmm... What manner of excuse am I to concoct?

Bump. Whoops, sorry, Nowi.

"Sorry, Shanzy! Nowi has to go help Gaius get candy!" Aaaaand she's gone, just like that.

... Huh. Even Nowi's been put to some kind of work. She's pretty damn busy with keeping morale up, huh? Now that I look around, everyone seems tense. Everyone's putting on fake smiles for Nowi so she her imagined world of bubbles isn't destroyed. The moment she's out of sight, they go back to their exhausted hunches.

I can't really fix their morale problems, sadly, not with so great an event looming over them. It's not my business, anyways. I just have to worry about myself and hope to whatever gods exist that we survive this. We don't need another Sumia.

Gods, we don't need another Sumia. It's bad enough that Emmeryn's going to die, we're going to have a damn tough job of fixing Chrom up after this.

Anyways, all I can really do is my part. That is, I can keep putting on the usual brave face, the mask I always wear. I've never known myself to go anywhere without acting in some form, though that probably isn't healthy.

It's all just a performance, really, and if I think of it as that, I ought to be fine. I'm one of those weirdos who never gets test anxiety, I look forward to showing off my skills. This is but one more challenge to me.

And that is what sets me apart... and will make me a Pokemon master.

Good lord, I don't even know how long it's been since I saw that movie, and I'm still quoting it. "I could use pants" was also great, my family actually remembers that line.

But in all seriousness, don't I have preparations to make as well? Gotta make myself useless, to give myself some excuse to fail. So... I'm going to Frederick's Fanatical Fitness Hour.

So many crunches... push ups... I don't care who you are, no trainer on Earth can push you harder than Frederick does.

I take my rest, and I'm too damn tired to remember shit.

* * *

Sweet Naga, I'm so sore. It's astounding that Frederick can dish out so much torture in one measly hour. The Twilight Knights would take five hours to do this, and we never train that long.

Naturally, it's quite a while before I roll out of bed, but after a while the smell of cinnamon rolls and my growling stomach forces me to it.

And I remember when it was my upset stomach that forced me out of bed. So many mornings I wake up and shudder at the thought of those days, when I couldn't eat breakfast for fear of vomiting. I lost quite a bit of weight while I was depressed.

Didn't I mention? One of the symptoms of clinical depression is that your digestive system gets out of whack. Believe me, it did... Horribly. My sleep schedule also got destroyed, too. Was a wonder I could keep working...

Then meds and therapy kicked in. It's wonderful to be free of it.

Mm, cinnamon rolls. "Thanks, mom." I get myself a plate and load it with three of those suckers, because I'm getting some muscle. I can actually feel my own muscle tone if I flex and run a couple of fingers along my skin. I bet I did enough crunches last night to make me some abs.

Mom smiles mischievously. "When I went to wake you up, you stayed asleep. So I made breakfast instead." She points to the middle roll– the best roll by far– which is sitting on her plate.

Meh, I can handle the border stuffs.

I just yawn, set my plate on the counter, and hug her weakly. "Thanks. I'm so sore I don't think I could do much right now..."

"Does that mean you won't be able to help with yardwork?" She starts to cut her rolls up with a fork.

Oh, I know and hate that tone. "I'll try, I promise. Just let me eat." Om nom nom...

A little later, she's wondering what the hell I did to get so sore. Ladies and gentlemen, this is what Frederick is useful for. Pain. He's really, really good at inflicting that.

After Nin has to pull me to my feet for the second time, I throw myself in bed to rest, and listen to some music. Fittingly, it's some serious "oh shit it's go time" music that plays... Examples: Descend, Cascade, Don't Speak Her Name, Dialga battle, and Clock Town Day Three.

Descend is probably the most fitting for tomorrow. It's going to be a hefty loss and we're going to have to deal with all the fallout... Because Emm's dying and we couldn't change it if we tried.

... Could we? Knowledge may be power, but it's not enough to reverse the odds.

Damn.

* * *

"Robin, up! Get the hell up, we need you!"

Lissa's holding onto my shoulder, trying to make me go less apeshit on our snoozing tactician. I'd punch her in the gut if it'd wake her, but I know more about refusing to wake up than anyone here. "Maybe you shouldn't be so rough," Lissa murmurs gingerly.

I look at her briefly, and note her shiny eyes which can only be described with a weaboo "kawaii desu". Holy shit, this girl is just... wow. I never saw anyone so anime in my life. "She's not waking rough, so Ima be up." Saying anything while being distracted by how adorabubble this girl is is pretty hard, so whatever I just said made any sense, it's a miracle.

Meanwhile, Robin turns over, mumbling. "Muh... mm..." I make to kick her, then she _screams_, forcing me to cover my ears and lose my balance.

As I'm getting the hell back up, I sing (despite my "did that really just happen" face) out, "Wakey wakey, sunshine!"

When I say I sang it, I don't mean I threw in a tune. I mean I used my singing voice, because holy damn that is the most audible tone I have. It rings, it really does. You can hear me across my high school campus when I'm using that.

Lissa's squatting down and helping up a disgruntled Robin. "Gods, I... Thank you two." She stands and rubs her head.

I raise an eyebrow. "Nightmare?"

Robin nods, her face still screwed up in discomfort, maybe even pain. "Yeah. I... Ow." Looks like there's a headache with it. Great.

I pat her shoulder– which is really the only comfort I can give right now– and open the tent flap to let everyone out. "C'mon, we got shit to do."

Normally I'm the one who sleeps in. When Robin can't wake due to a nightmare, you know shit's about to go south. Here's hoping we don't hit Antarctica.

I turn right back around and dig in my stuff. Today's a hell of a battle, right? To raise my morale, I should wear something that looks fucking badass. Sadly, we don't have a Bride's Bouquet lying around, so that option's out (seriously, that is the best class ever. The internet was so wrong to explode at its reveal.) I suppose I could slip a bit of armor on... I'd better go snatch me some mail. Plates are way too heavy, so I'm sticking with chains. Stuff's wonderfully flexible.

On the other hand, some plates for my thighs would be a good idea; one decent hit there and I bleed out. Same with shoulders. Okay, so I'm going to grab some light hauberk for those. And over it, I'll put the coat, just so people think I'm ill defended.

I'm all about surprising people. Besides, I can always fix the coat later. What else can I do? Oh, I should swap out my weaponry; my arcthunder's nearly out of magic. I should turn it into a sketchbook, like Noel does. I also handed Storm my steel lance– I'm surprised he can use that thing! Weapon levels are a bitch in this ga– wait, there's the flaw in my logic, this isn't a game. Derp.

Okay. There's the convoy– I just remembered, I gotta finish that artwork I promised Chrom. Maybe might help him out of his rut later. There's a mail shirt, some shoulder plates, and thigh guards. Excellent. Now, weapons? Ooh, a short spear and another arcthunder. Sweet.

Better go and put this on, then. I bump into Robin in our tent, and it looks like she's stressing over something. "Something wrong?" I dump my loot on my bedroll.

She scratches her head, almost frantic. "What if they have more archers than our intel says? What if we can't defeat their wyvern riders? What if–"

I lightly tap her with my shiny new short spear. "You've already made the plans, Robin. Live with it. If we fail, we'll know that you gave it your best crack, and that it wasn't your fault." My point made, I put the mail on and don my shirt over it. Next, the pauldrons...

Robin sighs, shivering as she does so. "I... I have a bad feeling about this."

I snap the plates on, then strap on my thigh guards. "You have six dreamers on your side. Honestly, if anyone's fucked, it's Gangrel."

She chuckles. "Thank you, Shanzira. But..."

I toss my coat on, then look back at Robin. "But what?"

She looks me in the eye. "Are we supposed to succeed, Shanzira?"

Oh dear gods, please don't tell me she knows. "I'm sorry, Robin, but I can't tell you that yet. If what I say differs from the outcome, we're damn fucked. Things can still change. We might fail when we're supposed to succeed, or the other way around. For the love of Naga, I'm just trying to make sure things go as they do, because it's really the best outcome I can hope for."

"So we succeed," she concludes.

Fold arms. "If you go on the battlefield with that knowledge, you might get complacent and fuck up. If you go thinking you're going to fail, the kick to your morale might just cause you to fail. Or worse, you might abandon the plan altogether and fuck it up even more by winging it."

I really, really hate this probability shit, it's a headache. Robin seems to think the same, because she holds her head. "Okay... you've made your point. I'll just give it the best effort I've got, then."

She gets a nod from me. "I wouldn't expect anything less." I glance around her desk, then look at my stuff. "Are we ready?"

Almost as if waking from a reverie, Robin jumps. "Oh. Yes, of course. I'll see you on the front."

We both exit, and just before we go our separate ways, I salute her. "Good luck, Robin!"

"We'll all need it!" She shouts back before running to Chrom.

I go the other way. My destination's the stables; I need to make sure Elincia's ready for the shenanigans that are about to go down. The makeshift door creaks as I push it open, and Elincia snorts happily upon seeing me. I grab a brush and pat her head. "Hey, girl."

She blows her lips right in my face. Rude, mischievous, but she meant it as "yay! You're back! I'm so happy!" At least, I think that's what she meant.

"You sweetie." Still going off of my estimated translation. "Ima clean you carefully, because–" I step into her... pen? Stable? I think stable's right. I step into there and start with the brush. "–we gotta huge mess to endure later today."

She swings her head around with a curious "uwhee?" I think that was a neigh, I honestly can't tell one horse sound from another.

Better answer her inquiry, though. "We're gonna be tryin' to save Emmeryn. I figure we should both look our best so that we feel our best." Bruuuusssh... Wow, that's a lot of dirt. I got my work cut out.

Her answer is to snicker at me. I ruffle her mane a little and keep brushing. "Shush. Might sound silly, but it's true. Anyways, I need you to help me, because I did something stupid yesterday and I'm too sore to do things properly. I'll need you to help me survive, ok?"

I quite like her response: A stubborn snort and a pawing at the ground. I translate that as "of course I'll keep you safe!"

I love my pegasus, she's awesome. "You're the best pegasus, you know? You always have a really good answer." Bruussshhh, brush brush.

... Well, the idea was the finish the conversation as I finished brushing her, but it looks like this'll take a while yet...

* * *

Elincia touches down right next to Robin, messing up her hair and blowing her cloak around with the resulting _fwump_. God, I love that effect. Robin turns around to face me, her annoyed face turning to a smile. And that is the power of a good bond.

I hop down and pat Elincia while Robin brushes a bit of dust off my coat. "Excellent, you're here now."

"Are we gonna raise hell yet," Storm whines. Lordy, I can be impatient. I thought I'd outgrown whining, yet here we are– Oh, wait, I just remembered, guys mature more slowly than girls. Yep, that'd explain it.

Robin rolls her eyes– and again I didn't see rudeness coming from her. "Give the others some time to prepare. I need to set our formation..." She climbs atop Elincia– wow, what a derp, she didn't even ask– and looks over the assembled troops.

"Awwww." You know, if Storm hadn't whined, I wouldn't have noticed the clear, flat bottle of brown fizzy liquid he's pulling out.

"Is that what I think it is?" I ask, eyes and mouth round.

He looks from the bottle to me, then hides it behind himself. "No."

I know what I saw. That was soda, and the shape of the bottle is what gives it away– "Sarsaparilla?"

"Shit!" Storm immediately turns and begins to try and crawl away, probably to put it somewhere safe.

Too late, sucker! I pounce on him, careful to not smash the bottle. That's the only caffeinated drink in this world; I'm not squandering it. I reach for it desperately, and with similar urgency, he tries to keep it from my grasp. "Share!"

"Like hell I'll share!" Comes the squawk. "This is the only bottle I got!"

I reach over his shoulder; he tucks it into his sternum. "Gimme some sasp, I need the caffeine!"

He tries to buck me off with a kick. "Fuck no!"

"What in gods' name are you two _doing?!_" Oh, hi Chrom. Don't mind us, we just want sweet, fizzy soda.

Storm takes advantage of my distraction and TOSSES THE BOTTLE FUCK FUCK! "Chrom, catch! Don't let Shanz get it!"

"YOU BASTARD!" I bring my elbow down hard into his back, he cries out because that was a hard one.

Chrom catches the bottle– so I assume, I don't hear breaking glass. "What the... Storm, what the hell is this?"

Storm twists around and screams, "MY PRECIOUS!"

You don't make a Lord of the Rings reference in Ylisse! "My ASS!" I try to pin him again but he's a bit stronger than me, so he just flips me over and this just got really awkward.

"That's my soda, and if you swipe it I swear to gods–"

I interrupt him with a good ol' kick in the gut; while he's grunting in pain, I shout, "yes, because I'm _soooo_ terrified of you!"

I hear Chrom murmur something like "ridiculous," then he raises his voice OH GODS HE'S LOUD: "BOTH OF YOU, STOP FIGHTING!"

We pause to protest. "But it's fun!"

"I haven't been able to grapple with a sibling in years!" Seriously, I sort of miss my play-fights with my sister. Well, except for the fact that she always won and I couldn't get out once she pinned me.

"We're about to start the battle," Chrom growls, "and you're acting like children. Now, get up or I'm drinking this entire bottle down." As if to punctuate his point, light glints off the bottle, and I can just see the sasp sloshing around, fizzing.

"Nuh-no..." In one despairing gasp, I've summed up our thoughts.

Storm gulps (quite audibly, too). "Yes, sir. C'mon, Shanz." He flips me over, again this feels extremely awkward, and helps me up. We face Chrom, both of us desperate to get the bottle back.

"So," Chrom holds it up to examine it closely, "what is this, anyways?" And he uncorks it– it took me so long to figure out how, and he just does it like that!– and takes a swig.

"My sasp," Storm whispers. His eyes are so shiny, there could be tears in them.

"The only carbonated drink in the world," I murmur. And Chrom's just drinking it down and there's that much less for us.

He lowers the bottle, surprise plain on his face. "That's a strange taste. I thought it was beer from the color, but it's definitely not." At Robin's curious expression, he continues. "It has a sort of bite to it, and it bubbles in your mouth, but it's also creamy."

"May I try some?" Chrom hands her the bottle and there goes another mouthful. "Whoa. That is a strange drink. But good."

Storm finally squeaks out a question. "May I have the bottle back?"

Robin considers, and turns to Chrom, gesticulating with the hand holding the bottle. Sarsaparilla splashes dangerously close to the mouth of the bottle as she does so. "I think we should share this with Frederick."

And this is where I put my foot down and step up to them. "You are not sharing my brother's sarsaparilla with Frederick. No way in hell."

Robin looks at me with this "oh really" face. "Then perhaps you two should grow up and stop fighting."

We've already stopped, what more do you want? While my brain fizzles out due to frustration, Storm asks the polite question. "Robin, may I please have my drink back?"

There's a glance from him, to the bottle, to him again. She pauses– as if wondering what else she can get us to do, gods, my dad does this to me! He promises the reward of something if we do a job, then withholds it until we do a whole damn list of things, in addition to his first request. "Only if you tell me what it is."

Oh thank Naga, that's easy. "It's a specially treated drink," I begin, preempting Storm. "pumped with gas– it's not bad for you in small amounts, it's not really poisonous– to give it a bite. That particular variety is sarsaparilla. It's particularly hard to get, even back home." Back home where carbonated drinks exist. Seriously, I only know of one place that makes sasp, and it comes around at a renfair once a year.

Storm stammers, probably expecting the "ventriloquist-dummy" response. Robin looks to me, and hands me the bottle. "You explained it, you take it."

Cool! I take a healthy swig and hand the bottle back to Storm, now half-empty. "Yum. All yours."

Storm looks at it sadly and sighs, quietly stowing it into his bag. I'm reminded of my first time having sarsaparilla; it was flat so I had to get help finishing it. Birch beer is better anyways, in my opinion.

"Now, you two need to get into posi–" Robin's orders are interrupted by a small belch. Ahaha! Yup, carbonated drinks do that to you. "Er, excuse me. As I was saying, get into position. You'll both be on the right flank, flying over the sand. Storm, you're with Cordelia so you won't nee to worry about hitching a ride."

At the exact same time Storm affirms this, Chrom burps loudly. Jeebus priest, he didn't even have that much soda. I think he's just good at being loud. I snicker, straighten my face, then salute. "Arright, Storm, let's get. I'll haul you to Cordy."

"Wait." What? Why are you looking so confused? "I'm with Cordelia?"

Wow, what a derp moment, Storm. "Yeah. Robin just said that. You weren't paying attention?"

Storm's quiet for a moment as he thinks, then he facepalms. "No, I wasn't. Sorry, it's just, uh..."

I raise an eyebrow; he just keeps stammering. After about... thirty seconds of this, I grab him by the hood and haul him atop Elincia's rear. "You're embarrassing the family name." I kick my heels into Elincia's sides; she spreads her wings and moves trots into the sky.

Yes, trots. Pegasi are awesome, okay?

"Family name?" Storm asks. "We have one? Other than–"

"Yes," I interrupt. We do not bring our true names into the world, that is my rule. "You never made a fake last name? I just played around with a few letters and came up with "Dinrel"."

He counts on his fingers for a bit, then his face lifts in comprehension. "Ahh, I see how you came up with that. You sw–"

I shut him up yet again. "Yes. I did that. Anyways, since you never bothered to make one up, your last name is now Dinrel. Stop embarrassing it."

"You're a really pushy little sister," he says with a smirk and folded arms.

"And you're a spineless little bro. Why'd you stammer earlier?"

Armor-piercing question? Must be, because he froze right up. "Uh." And it's right back to stammering, wow. "I, uh..."

I'd look back at him to comfort him, but sadly, I have to mind where I'm flying. "I'm you, okay? You can tell me anything, I can keep a damn secret. If it's that embarrassing, I won't even tease you."

"You won't?" Ah, the usual paranoia. Good, he learned to not be a shmuck.

"I won't."

"I, uh... She– I should start at the beginning..." Wow, he's... Wait a minute. "From the first time I saw her artwork, I fell in love with Cordelia."

Good gods, he's just like me, down to the crushes on video game characters. I shoulda seen that coming, and I didn't. Derp! But wow, Storm and Cordelia...

I look back at him briefly, with an attempt at a warm smile. "Good luck, then. You've got good taste; when I first saw her, my thoughts were "if I were I guy, I'd date her.""

I turn my head back round to look front, and as I do so, I catch Storm slumping over in relief. He wraps his arms around my torso in a tight hug, tight enough that I can't breathe. "Thank you."

I pry his hands off. "I need to breathe, Storm. But thanks. I do appreciate a good hug." Aaand there he goes again with another glomp. At least he's not choking me. I let him hold his grip until I see the other two fliers– Cordelia and Nineeyena– and relax the reins to signal Elincia to pull down.

I don't even tell him we're about to land, I just let the jarring shock of touching down shake him out of it. While he's crying out in surprise, I'm smirking and bouncing along. "Okay, your fare expires now, geddoff."

He tumbles right off, stumbling around dizzily. I look to Nin. "So who's riding with me?"

I note with amusement Lon'qu sharing her pegasus, doing his best to ignore the women around him. "You're riding with Donny," and she points at the only pot-headed man in the army.

I briefly catch Lon'qu catching Storm's eyes and silently begging for help; Storm just shakes his head, waves, and walks up to a mounted Cordelia. He proceeds to stammer his way through an explanation that they're paired. Now that's what I call revenge... So I'm with Donnel?

He's improved his look; I can identify some mail underneath his tunic, he's got metal gauntlets and boots, and he's got some serious weaponry– a steel lance and a whole bunch of javelins. Excellent, he's outfitted for fighting from atop a pegasus he's not driving, and yet he can still survive if I decide to dump him somewhere (which I probably won't; his accent makes me feel at home).

"Heya, lady Shanzira!" He's grinning excitedly, and he looks plain happy to be traveling and going to exotic places. My, would that everyone could share his optimism. "Ready to save the Exalt?"

I smile, reflecting his attitude. "Heya, Donny. I'm ready as I can be. Need a lift?" I offer a hand so he might climb onto Elincia; he takes it and I yoink him up with an "Upsy!"

"Wow!" He takes a big, sweeping view of the desert and nearby castle. "You can see a whole lotta stuff from here!"

I nod. "Yup." Looking back to the other four here, I ask, "How're you guys doing?"

Nin waves, answering without words; I take it she's fine. Lon'qu makes me smile; he's gritting his teeth, redfaced, and trying to hold his fear gynophobia back.

"I'm all right," answers Cordelia, drawing my attention away from him. "Are you, Storm?"

Wow. My brother's more comic relief than I am; he's also really red in the face. "A... A hundred per-percent."

That was a damn fine stammer. Far too legit to be acting. "Storm, on a scale of one to tent, how scared were you in that last fight?"

He's so nervous, I can see him clutching Cordelia's tunic. ... Ohhh myyy. "Uh, eight."

Eyebrows, arise! "Then thank your lucky stars you're with Cordelia, or you'd die in this fight." I trust his judgement when it comes to being in over his head. I only get nervous when I know I'm screwed, and Storm should be the same.

His face blanches, and he just hugs Cordelia tightly as a comfort toy. "Oh gods," he squeaks.

I just finessed him into nearly feeling Cordelia up, I mark this as an achievement. Well done, Storm. Well done. I smirk for just a moment, hearing Cordelia stutter because of Storm wussing out. Then I hear a voice shaking with embarrassment, but still yelling at me: "Shanzira! You could be nicer to him. He hasn't been with us long!" Oh, she doesn't even mention that there's a strange guy squishing her. Then again, it's probably that he's desperately begging for comfort that makes her not attack him.

I draw myself up. "He's my brother, and if he doesn't toughen up, it's my fault." How do I figure this? There's no other member of the family to look after him. "I don't want to see his guts splattered on sand, I'd rather he _lived._ So, Storm?" I look to him, still clinging to Cordelia. "Suck it up."

"Ouch." That was Donnel, you can hear the sympathy in his voice. "Talk about tough love..."

Storm screws his face up in concentration, then lets go, straightens his spine, and sits at attention, both hands on the spear as they should be. "Yes, sir!"

There we go. That is a properly trained Twilight Knight. I look at Cordelia, who just swung herself around to confirm his transformation with her own eyes. "You see? He'll be fine as long as you're watching him, Cordelia."

Satisfied that he's recovered, Cordelia looks back at me. "I hope so, for his sake." Whoa, she's legitimately worried. That's... really sweet.

Eldrad would be squeeing right now over a new pairing, if he had witnessed this.

"Shepherds, Ylisseans, and our Feroxi allies!" Whoa holy shit, that's Chrom. I look over to the center of the van– that's where he is, Chrom put himself on the front lines– and see him turned around, addressing the army. "Today is the day we save the exalt! Today is the day we rescue Emmeryn from Mad King Gangrel! You have lent my your help so far, for which I cannot thank you enough. I need you for just a little bit longer, so we can bring Emmeryn home and bring Plegia peace from its insane king. For peace itself, I ask that you stay by my side and _fight! Today is the day we return peace to Ylisse!"_

Okay, that was an impressive speech; it raises my eyebrows. There's no way in hell Chrom wrote that, he's not really that good at princely things. I mean, he's a good leader, but...

... Actually, I could be wrong. "Pretty speech," I comment.

Nin's voice replies. "I wrote it." That explains it. "Robin suggested something to raise morale, and asked me to write something for Chrom to say." Well, that's Nin's talent: She's a better writer than anyone here, and with Eldrad, Shio, and I around, that's a hard title to claim. I don't know about Storm, he hasn't displayed it yet.

I smile at this. "Thanks, Ninny. Well, all..." I inhale to project–

And then the signal elthunder shoots into the sky–

"LET'S GET!"

On that command, everyone– not just us, the entire vanguard– lurches forth. We, the pegasus troop, are separated from them in but seconds, while the mages fill in the blank we left. We're kicking up sand, but we'd have to turn one-eighty degrees to see even a hint of it; it's pretty far back. And rapidly approaching are Plegians, just sitting there, so much slower than us.

I target the third archer I see– Nin and Cordelia have the first and second– and _fire_. Seconds later, I pass over his smoking, fried corpse. Most of Donnel's "hooey!" is swallowed in the wind. I pull up and hover, glancing around for anything else to kill, and point out one (un)lucky soul not too far– actually within javelin range. I point him out to Donny, and one small swoosh later, the soldier falls in a puff of sand, a bloodied javelin sticking out of his neck.

Huh. Blood really does spurt out fountain-style when you hit that vein. Damn. Who else is there? Who will volunteer to be kill number three?

My eyes drift back down to the soldier Donnel impaled. He actually fell backward; his eyes are open to the sky. I can see his face and make out an expression of panic, like he briefly attempted to save himself before being thrown unceremoniously into the abyss of death.

In some primal, inexplicable way, I feel a terrible pit of guilt in my stomach, and no matter how much I remind myself that he had to die, it won't go away.

"Shanz, are ya all right? We got a few archers comin' in."

I have to mangle more of these poor people?

Separately from my consciousness, my hand moves of its own accord and my mouth forms a few chants, preparing to shoot a spread of arcthunder at them. I can see the dismay on their faces just before the chant is finished and the lightning shoots out at them, engulfs them, and leaves them as steaming corpses.

All of this... For nothing. So many people will die, just so we can fail to save Emm...

I feel something hard poking into my side. It would tickle if it didn't hurt. I look to the side and see the butt of a lance; Donny's poking me. "Lookie, Shanz! She looks like she's from Ylisse!"

I turn my head. Libra. ... If Libra can find the strength to cut these people down, so can I, damn the consequences. "Come on, Elincia!" Heels dig into haunches, and we zoom at him. "Hey!"

He hears my voice, looks up, and sees my wave. His face looks as though he doesn't dare hope that I'm an ally. "Who are you? An Ylissean pegasus knight?"

Elincia drifts downwards per my instruction. "I'm a Shepherd. I'm here with the Prince! You're fighting to save Emm, right? Lemme take you to Chrom, then!"

His entire face lifts in new hope; I remember that the rest of his allies had died on the way. "Truly? Oh, thank merciful Naga... Let us go!"

Wait a minute, problem. I can't carry two people plus myself. Uh... Libra will have to follow on foot. "Can ya follow? I can't lift more than two people!"

He nods urgently. "Of course, madam!"

One quick escort mission later– which consisted of one wyvern rider seeing me and getting shot down because of his nosiness– I have Libra talking to Chrom, and I amscray before the awkward happens.

Oh, wait, shit, I nearly forgot. I turn back around, ignoring Donnel's shouts about what the hell I'm doing. Elincia touches down just as Chrom tries to physically wipe the embarrassment off his face. "Sir, I almost forgot: To the southeast, I saw a plegian woman, a dark mage, who looks reluctant to fight. Dark hair, curvy body. Maybe we can convince her to defect?"

Chrom looks both surprised and impressed. "Really? Thank you. I'd like you to rejoin Nin and Cordelia; Robin's about to have the enemy archers taken o–"

Aaaand right in the middle of this is a pretty loud _BANG_ in the distance. I'd say that was Robin. Chrom turns back around and points to the other two fliers. "Go!"

He gets a salute before I leave, then we _fwump_ up some sand in his face and find my buddies. "Donnel, help me find 'em, they seem to have gone poof."

He scans the skies briefly, then points. "There!"

Oh dear shit, they're fighting a bunch of wyvern riders, who seem to have decided to go after Cordelia, leaving Nin to try and fail to snipe then with Arcthunder. Seriously? "The shit are they doing?!" (of course I had to say that like it was their fault. Wow.) Another fwump and few seconds later, I've stabbed a rider out of the way. "Nin, 'Delia, the fuck's going on?!"

Storm shoots a bit of elthunder before replying. "Some idiot by the name of Robin ordered us to go after these guys." Dear gods, Robin, really? You're gonna get us killed. "I sure hope you have some wind in your sleeves!"

Arrgghh. Noel. Noel, why the fuck did you give me a sketchbook instead of an arcwind? When was the last time I had a legit wind tome, anyways? Sigh. "Grr. All I got is thunder," I tell Storm. Turning back to the wyvern riders, I shout, "EAT SPARKS, SCALEBAGS!"

ZZZZAP!

Riders fall off their wyverns as the reptiles descend, having lost control of their wings. There are shrieks and screams of panic– instantly silenced by the inescapable ground. Blood soaks the sand, only to be absorbed quickly by its thirst.

"I-is there anything I can do to help, Miss Shanzira?" Oh, right. If Donny and his quivering voice hadn't snapped me back, I... best not think about that.

I look back to him. "You have javelins, right?"

His blank face turns into a smile and a nod. "Yes, ma'am!" He waves one around, I put it back down with one hand.

After that, I point to the ground. "Toss 'em at the infantry below, provided they're Plegian, of course." I turn back to my front and go back to dealing with the wyvern riders.

A few seconds later, I catch a wink of sparks down below, and I have to yank the reins HARD in order to not get zapped by the resulting Elthunder. "What the..." Donnel's around, can't swear. "What the heck was that?"

"Uhhh, I think I mighta gone after that lady you mentioned–" Donny begins–

Oh dear shit no. We have Tharja trying to kill us, we're so screwed. "Time to amscray!" Heels, flanks, _fwump,_ go! There are few enough wyvern riders that Nin and Cordy can finish them off. Let's see, how can I make myself useful... Ima kill the boss, whatever the hell his name was. "That guy looks like the enemy commander, let's fry him real quick." Ignoring Donnel's loud whoaaaa, we touch down in front of the general in seconds. "Hello, ya old fart!"

He prepares his lance with a snarl, and right at that moment I hear Robin squawk: "SHANZIRA, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!" Oh good Naga, what now? "We have a situation over here, we need you!"

"Aw, shit." Crack crack, that was my neck rolling. "Welp." Elincia turns at one rightward yank of the reins, and I catch a sneer I wish I could miss:

"Running away like a little girl?"

Snort. "If I weren't following orders, you'd be dead a few minutes sooner than you will be now." _Fwump._ A few seconds pass, then I shut my eyes to keep the flying sand from getting in them. We just landed in front of Robin. "What the hell is it?"

She points to the Tharja mess. "You pissed someone off."

Oh, shit, okay, I did. Please tell me she's still recruitable. "Um, just get Chrom to talk to her? That's the only course of action I got for ya–"

_Thunk._ I twist my head to see what that was... Tharja's down, but not dead? Who– Oh. Kellam. I... suppose that's convenient. I look back to Robin. "I don't even know what's going on anymore. She'll be useful, keep her around."

Robin gives me a slow nod. "All... right." She's trying to wrap her head around what's going on in mine, and honestly, I'm still trying to do the same.

Nod. ... Is it just me, or is everything suddenly quiet? Oh hey, Nin and Cordy finished off the wyvern riders. Innnhale... "BOSS! THE SKIES ARE CLEAR!"

"ROBIN, I'M GIVING THE SIGNAL!" Holy shit Chrom can be _loud_ when he wants to be. Damn. My ears don't get a respite just yet; there's a series of _fwump_s as Phila's pegasus knights rush in. ... Oh gods. Phila.

"Robin, do we have anyone with a physic staff?" I just had to avert my eyes because right now, Phila is not a pretty sight. Euuuggh. Okay, this is a really important part of my personality, so remember it: If I see someone hurt, I cringe because I imagine those same hurts on me. I have no clue how I've been able to fight up 'till now. It's just sort of been... I'll actually suffer those hurts myself if I don't fight. Selfishness.

... Who the hell am I even monologuing to?

"Lissa has one, why?" Robin, thank you for snapping me out of it. Seriously. Sometimes I gotta pull my head out of my head.

I point up at the single falcon knight in the formation. "Phila looks like she needs it."

I can just see Robin's eyes growing round. "Gods, what did they _do_ to her?"

It's simple logic, so... "She leads the pegasus knight troop, right? I'd bet anything they tortured her for information."

At this, she just turns around and screams for the best healer we got. "LISSA! We need you!"

... And too late. The risen archers just appeared. Fuck. No chance of saving Phila, oh well... I let Elincia relax herself while Robin and Chrom freak out. I know what's going to happen, I don't need to pay attentio–

"BWAHAHA! Oh, did an army of living corpses just _appear_ out of the blue?" So much for ignoring– "Truly, the heavens smile upon mighty King Gangrel today!"

... The urge to kill him, or just wreck his day, is extremely overpowering. I'm having a hell of a tough time restraining myself. It's like trying not to sketch down ideas in the middle of art class because you have to watch a presentation.

Except this is far more violent and deserves no comparison to the sacred idea of art.

"What do you do," I pant, "when your mind tells you one thing, but your heart _screams_ another?"

"Shanzira, don't..."

Arrows fly. One by one, even as Gangrel says, the pegasus knights fall, screaming and flailing, until suddenly silenced in the sand.

"And that's the worst part, ain't it?" I reflect. "I can't move or I'm dead."

"Miss Shanzira, what're you thinkin?"

"No... no no no..."

"It can't... we've lost..."

Silence... nothing but silence... Until broken by the one thing which makes my temper _boil_:

"I believe this is what they call a reversal of fortunes. Now... Grovel before me! Plead! Beg for your worthless lives!"

I twist around, take two hands, and deposit Donnel on the ground. I turn back around, aligning my spine again, and lightly touch my feet to Elincia's sides, prompting a walk. I can't control myself at this point; my eyes are half open and my will is no longer mine.

Shit, I've gone and lost my temper.

"Hey Gangrel!" Those are the first words my mouth forms; I don't know what's coming out next. "I have a message from your mother! She asked us to deck you in the schnoz!"

Oh, a reference to DBZ abridged. How nice.

"What?" That was Robin. I think.

"Isn't this precious?" Comes the laugh, fueling my temper more (just when I was about to regain control!). "One more pegasus knight to shoot down! Archers!"

Oh dear Naga what the hell am I doing whatever I'm doing it is going to suck– HEELS. SIDES. KNEES. SQUISH. Fwump, fwump, fwump, FWUMP!

Okay, I got Elincia into the sky, I'm fucked even more, what the hell is my temper thinking?!

"Oopsie!" The pitch of that– annoyingly high, like he's imitating a little girl– pushes me over the precipice of insanity yet again. "Wait a minute, I _remember_ you! You were the pup who ran across the border and invaded Plegia!"

"JUST LIKE MY SPEAR'S GOING TO INVADE YOUR ASS!"

Ohhhh myyyy.

I'm commentating even though I can't control myself. I'm trying to make myself laugh even when I'm too angry to control my own body. I... I don't even know.

All I know is that I just pushed Elincia into the fastest pace possible in the direction of the precipice Emmeryn's on.

And about halfway there, my attention snaps back. There are arrows flying at me, almost in slow motion– I can see the light glinting off their heads, the sand sparkling like a sea of glass, contrasting to the snowy appearance of Elincia's hair and feathers. I'm five yards or so away from saving her, and there's one arrow in particular coming at me. It's going for my shoulder... I have just enough time to dodge.

But I remember that this is supposed to fail.

_Thunk._

Pain blossoms in my shoulder, the head having pierced the armor I put on earlier. The resultant hunching cringe causes Elincia to veer downwards, towards the sand, and I pull myself back just in time to prevent a fatal crash-landing.

We still crashed, but we're alive... right...? The darkness makes it hard to tell...

* * *

I sit up with a gasp, my heart pounding. It's dark, but my eyes begin to adjust and show me the green paint and poster-plastered walls of my room on Earth. My heart is still pounding... Though I'm in no danger. My left shoulder hurts like hell, like I got shot with a huge needle there. ... More like shot with an arrow, I realize, as it comes back. I reach for my favorite plush doll– a unicorn who I named Rapidash years ago– and hug her tightly. I apologize without words for the tears which stain her fur moments later. It takes a lot of self-control not to wail.

I'm twenty years old, and yet one little event has reduced me to a mewling pre-teen. This is– with no exaggeration– what I was like in middle school. I've lost my temper like that twice that I can remember, but never for so long a time. Normally I regained control before someone could get hurt. This time, someone kept egging me on, and...

I suppose Wrath might just be my sin, after all. It's either Wrath or Lust...

I want... I want it to end. I don't want to suffer those nightmares again, Mommy...

* * *

Warmth and heat. Red light filters through my closed eyelids, hinting that it's bright as hell around me. Am I... Am I back in Plegia? I had hoped, briefly, that I was dead, and it would end... That's right, I woke up in California again, for a short time.

I lift my head and open my eyes. There's a wet nudging at my side– Elincia, trying to stir me. Her head next nuzzles the side of my face, and she nickers softly.

I know, I know... I'm getting up. Hold your pegasi.

Gods, my shoulder! ... I got shot. Right. Sleep always throws everything off. Okay, put one foot in the sand, get the knee out of it.

"ENOUGH!"

That's Emm, right? So... I gave it my best shot... No one can blame me for failing.

"SILENCE!" Gangrel screams. My eyes drift downwards again, and I force a shudder through my body to dispel my temper. I look to my still-throbbing shoulder, and find my coat being stained red with the obvious.

"Elincia, can you help me?" I look to her, see the determination in her eyes... and ears, which are folded back angrily. She nudges me again, and I wrap my good arm around her neck. Uuuupsy-daisy... And I swing one leg over her back. "Don't fly yet." Snort, she answers.

"Gangrel, is there no hope you will listen to reason?"

I reach back and sort out my coat; it's gotten caught on my boots. "You mean more of your sanctimonious babble?"

Wait a shit, she has him distracted. I kick my heels into Elincia, quickly! FWUMP! Hurry, hurry! There's Chrom and Robin, there, there! Yes! Touchdown!

"Prepare to meet the ground, and your maker! That is, unless someone were to give me the Fire Emblem... Now!"

Robin rushes over to me and I renew my grip on my kind mount's mane. "Shanzira! You're alive?!"

One little sway, and I damn near fell off. "Not if I don't get healed quickly."

"Sis..." Oh... Storm's in the distance, staring at me. Yes, I know. I'm an idiot. I'm a really big idiot. I am dumber than the cat who tried to bait our dog statuette into chasing him.

"ALL RIGHT!" I flinch. Chrom is very loud. "Emm, I know you won't approve, but..." He pauses, thinking of what next to say. "_Maybe_ someday we'll face a crisis where _maybe_ the Fire Emblem may have helped, but what Ylisse needs now is you! I need my sister, and Ylisse needs its Exalt. If those dark days should come, we'll face them together."

I finally see all the errors in his reasoning. There's the obvious "you're definitely going to need it soon you idiot," but he's also assuming that Emmeryn is the one true Exalt of Ylisse, that she'll be the Exalt forever. That's a hell of a fallacy... He needs to grow up.

"There's nothing more we can do," I sigh.

True to these words, Emmeryn begins. "Thank you, Chrom. I now know what I must do."

I want to look away. I want to look away, but that would be cowardly, and Shanzira Dinrel is many things, but not a coward.

"Plegians! I ask that you hear the truth of my words. War will win you nothing but sadness and pain, both inside your borders and out. Free yourselves from this hatred, from this cycle of pain and vengeance. Do what you must..." She looks down briefly, closing her eyes, then a resolute forward. "... As will I. See now that one selfless act has the power to change the world!"

"Emm, no! NO!"

_Don't look away._ Emmeryn takes a step forward while Chrom immediately sprints for her. _This is what I chose._ She looks around, reflecting upon the land in her final moments, then lowers her head as if in prayer. _If I regret it..._ She looks up once more, folds her hands at her chest, and steps forth. ... _That's my fault._

She descends.

Chrom cries out, Lissa screams, Robin gasps. Time itself seems to slow; I can see light reflecting off Emmeryn's crown. The dust kicked up as Chrom runs seems to meet the ground minutes after rising up, while Lissa's scream draws out, highlighting every crest and valley in the wavelength. All seems to glow as though ethereal... I notice now Emmeryn's robe flapping frantically in the air rushing by. I can even make out dozens of little talismans... That's right. Noel gave her that cloak, in the hopes it might help preserve her life. Noel, you idiot... Idiot, idiot, idiot... Did I not teach you?

Red droplets fly everywhere as Emmeryn finally collides with the sandy pavement below the precipice, a _crunch_ ringing in my ears. Only now does Chrom slow to a stop, fall to his knees, and do his best not to weep.

"BWA HA HA HA!" How I can hear Gangrel over Chrom and Lissa screaming, I don't know. "And here I thought death to be an ugly–" He's cut off by a flash of green and a sharpened gale.

"Yours will be." Now that is the honest-to-Naga soprano which is my future progeny. That is Noel, approaching in what seems to be the very same rage I was in earlier.

She's late.

While Gangrel's still processing what the hell happened, Noel faces us. "Shepherds, run now! I will hold him off as long as I can! Go!" And a stab of lightning to the of her head pushes her onto her face, her hood and mask cut cleanly in two.

Wait.

"The girl's right!" Basilio yells in the distance. "I secured an escape route! We have to go NOW!"

"B-but her body," Chrom blubbers. "I have to..."

Curly red hair soars into the sky and descends back down in an arc as Noel looks up. "I can handle this! Just get out of here!"

I've never seen such determination in anyone's eyes... Least of all the brown orbs possessed by my own daughter. She's my spitting image– curved eyebrows, faint freckles dotting a ramp nose, carefully curved lips, and dimples as plain as her snarl. But most of all, she has the one trait I've treasured for many years– my copper-like red hair, curling everywhere in all the frizziest yet elegant ways.

My spitting image, a complete badass...

"Noel! What did you do?!" That would be Marth in the distance...

Noel looks to her, an elwind clutched in her fingers– the same Elwind I gave her over a month ago. "Marth, help!" She flicks a wrist, beckoning her.

"Of course!" Lucina joins in just as Gangrel prepares his next attack. Then Elincia _fwump_s off for me, realizing that I'm too out of it to steer.

She probably tried to hide her face because of just how much she looks like me. I mean, we already have Storm... Hard to justify yet another mysterious relative.

How is it she's such a badass at her age? I was a sniveling wuss back then.

"You have an arrow in your shoulder."

Oh, Storm, shut up. ... Yeah, I'd better get it healed. I look to my right, seeing my clone and Cordelia, of course in the air like me. "Where's Anna?"

He blinks. "Anna? Why?"

I try not to droop. "Lissa and Maribelle probably aren't feeling up to much right now." I don't even want to think about it. I just want to forget this whole episode happened.

Storm nods, understanding. "Cordelia, can we try to find her?"

She nods wearily. "Of course. She should be by the convoy... Down there."

I drift downwards, not entirely conscious of my destination, not entirely conscious of Eldrad freaking out over my shoulder, of Anna yanking the arrow out and healing it, of being placed in the convoy to rest...

I just... want the pain to end...

* * *

**Hooey. Feeels. We now know what Noel looks like; renew your guesses about her dad. She was intentionally designed to be a pain to guess.**

**Anyways! To celebrate 100 followers, I'm going to write you guys a drabble. There will soon be a poll on my profile page on what the prompt for it will be– Yes, you guys can pick. Yes, I'm ripping off G2G, but I'm actually going to****_ write_**** this. (I hope you have BURN HEAL!)**

**I hope you guys enjoyed this monster of a chapter... -faceplants- I'm sort of dead.**


	27. It Hurts

**Author's notes: Sorry about the 11-day delay, I took my sweet time to plan. That, and 26 left me exhausted. On the bright side, I'm again working on improving my writing. It pays to be perfectionist sometimes.**

**At college while writing this, I wouldn't be surprised if the internet farted while posting this. Eh well, I can always paste it in again and try to remember what the hell I said here in the notes.**

**Enjoy this one... Although it's full of doom and gloom until Shanz gets her shit together. But even then, it's still gloomy. But it does feature a brief point of view swap towards the beginning.**

* * *

We chose this. We chose this, and yet it feels as though everything went wrong.

It wouldn't be the first time we made a mistake. However, this is the first time we've made a mistake so grievous. ... Why am I saying "we"? I meant "I". I chose to let Emmeryn die, and it feels as though I just fucked up in the worst way possible.

It hurts.

I almost wish that I could have picked the moral route of saving her, but then, how would we have done so? It would have taken a hell of a plan, and I have to say our best tactician is Eldrad. And his plans... Well, he's said he hates gravity, and most of his plans end up with him facing off against said force of nature.

Storm... Well, he's me. Which presumably means he sucks just as much as I do. Wasn't it about a month ago that I tried playing my modified version of Awakening, and accidentally let Sully die? Yeah. I can't plan for shit. I always just wing it... I imagine Storm is just the same.

Shio. My best friend, Shio. She's definitely better at Fire Emblem than I am, but I can't see her being our tactician. She's too slow– every time she took a test back in high school, she'd have to stay in class after school or during lunch to finish it. (I, meanwhile, always finished early and aced the tests.) No, she's not a good choice for our tactician.

Nin might be an idea. She's certainly smart, smarter than I am, but she's not as good under pressure as I am. While she shrinks under it, I rise to the occasion and perform better than I ever did in practice. Test anxiety is something I've only ever experienced once, and it was in a class I legitimately sucked in. No, Nin isn't the answer; she's smart, but can't perform under pressure.

Welsh isn't an option. He's not really into Fire Emblem; I myself wonder why he's here (but I am nonetheless grateful; having another friend to watch my back is a blessing). Besides, his humor is always a good thing to have around. But despite how enjoyable his company is, he's certainly no tactician. He plans for comedy, not drama.

Me? We've seen how I've done so far. I fuck up beautifully when this is put in my hands. Gangrel and Validar ought to be grateful for my interference; I've let things go their way whenever I could. I can't be our tactician, but even so, what better option is there?

If I'm to continue this gig, I need to improve. But... No, I can just hand it over to Eldrad or Nineeyena. I'm not cut out for this. Shanzira Dinrel is not a tactician, and she never was. I'm just an artist who wants to make games, who knows how to swing weapons around.

I never should have come here. It wasn't even my choice, I just appeared, no questions asked, no details given to me. I could have lived without the knowledge of this universe and what occurs in it.

It's tempting to take a leaf from Emm's book right now, but for different reasons– I ought to take my punishment for fucking up so much. I've dodged death so diligently, and I have to wonder why I'm still alive in this realm.

Perhaps it's not whether I die, but how I die.

... Either way, doing that now would inflict insult to injury. I'd better stick around for just long enough that my disappearance won't bother anyone.

It hurts.

"What hurts?"

I guess I said that one out loud. "My heart." I curl into a little ball, telling Robin– who's clambering into the convoy now– that I don't want to talk. I move a haphazardly placed sword out of the way and nestle myself into a nice nest of weapons.

A gentle hand rests on my shoulder, lighter than being poked but still enough to keep me awake. "Oh, Shanzira..." Aren't you a little busy to be grieved, Robin? "I hate to ask now, but... what was supposed to happen?"

You bitch, Robin. Just leave me to languish, okay? When I'm miserable, I don't want company. "Emm was supposed to die." Hopefully stating the truth so bluntly will get the message across.

"No..." I hear shifting steel as Robin plops down on what I assume to be her rear. (My eyes are closed, I can't tell.) Clearly, she doesn't want to move, so I'll suffer myself to explain.

"It isn't whether or not she dies, but the manner in which she goes. A quiet assassination is meaningless; a public martyring will have powerful consequences. She won't have died in vain." Hopefully this is asshole-ish enough to get her off my case, but heartfelt enough to make me not a full bitch. ... What am I saying? I already am a full bitch.

"W... What would have happened if we had saved her?" As timidly and gingerly as she asked that, I still wish she would go the hell away. It's not like I even know the answer.

"Probably she would have died at some other point," I sigh. "Everyone knows how important she was to Ylisse. What we need to do is prove that we can actually continue without her. That way, Gangrel will have failed." And as good an exalt as she is– was, she wasn't smart in war. I understand her need to protect the people, but that's kind of hard to do when you're dead.

Yes, I'm sleepy. I just nearly died, yet again. I'm probably not thinking straight. I think I can still feel my shoulder throbbing, even though Anna already healed it.

It still hurts.

"Either way, I can't regret it now. I agreed to let this happen."

"YOU WHAT?!"

... And this is what happens when I'm sleepy, I shoot my mouth off in a suspicious way. I'm so dead. I curl up more tightly and brace myself–

"You and _who_ agreed?!"

Okay, that wasn't so loud, but it was still sharp and painful. I'm about to incriminate ourselves so badly it's ridiculous.

"The other dreamers." How do I explain this? Gods, we're exactly what I wanted us to avoid being– some supreme jury who decides who dies and who lives. We're not fit for that kind of power, and we were so wrong to not try to save Emm.

"Why?!" Right now, what comes to my mind is the image of Emmeryn falling from the cliff, cloak flapping wildly as air rushed by her. "Don't you want to help us, Shanzira? Then why have you done this? Why did you..." And the sight of her hitting the hard stone ground... There were blood flecks everywhere. TV Tropes was right; it's such a gory discretion shot in the game. It's bloody disgusting in reality– you can see white bone sticking out from her legs, and I'd bet a lot of money her skull cracked in multiple different places. "You've done more harm than good. Why?"

Fair, beautiful Emmeryn, broken. Broken, because we chose to let that happen. Broken, because I chose not to dodge an arrow at the crucial moment. No one can know of that.

It hurts.

"Leave me be," I croak painfully.

"Very well." After the sounds of steel clinking and shifting, and fabric against fabric, Robin's voice does not trouble me for a while yet, leaving me free to languish.

I fucked up in the most extreme way, and I'll be damned if I'm _not_ kicked out for it– if _we're_ not kicked out for it. I told her that all six dreamers agreed to it. We wouldn't even deserve a fair trial, we practically conspired to foil Robin's plans.

I am in no way helpful to the Shepherds, I'm nothing more than a diseased part of them. Literally everything that's gone wrong can be blamed on me– the war starting is even my fault, because I ran across the lines to grab Nin! I agreed to go mop the floors with Sumia that night, knowing Validar would be out there, and I should have realized he would be able to best us. I've shown many times that I can't follow orders for shit, despite how obedient I am in the Twilight Knights.

What was this bullshit about me performing well under pressure? In the pressure of Ylisse and its wars, I can't do shit right! The grades are coming in, my dismal efforts are shown, and I still won't be able to improve, even after this.

I've got to do _some_thing about this. Naga, give me the strength to do this. I need to sit myself down, review what happens, and work. Even if I kill myself from the strain, I have got to make an actual effort. But just playing the game won't fix much... I need to play the game in this world. My 3DS is dead, though... I can't shift it between worlds. What can I do? Recharge the 3DS, but how...

Two heads are better than one, even if they're identical. I ought to be able to tell Storm about this, since he's me and will sympathize. And, I just realized! He has a boom box which he's kept powered! _He knows how to charge it!_

I fling myself out of the convoy, probably picking up a scrape or two on the weapons in it. Water splashes as I sprint, mud flying behind me.

STORM, WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?! You're our only hope!

* * *

_WHAM!_

"SHIT SHIT SHIT!" I catch myself at the perfect time; my mysterious twin just slammed into me. Thank god I've been working on my balance, or my coat would be done for. I stare into her eyes, wild with some sort of fiery desperation, and ask, "what the hell was that for?"

"Sorry," she tries to brush it aside like it was nothing– she damn near ruined both our outfits. I know that's a silly thing to worry about at this time, but when have I ever been mature? "Listen, your stereo's always running, right? That is, it's always got power. How do you charge it?"

Good god, she sounds like a mad alchemist. Yes, alchemist. I pat the parcel still strapped to my back, covered in two layers of canvas to protect it from the rain. "I keep it powered with thunder magic."

Now this is talking to myself, isn't it? It's like actually getting to say aloud my mental arguments. (If anyone claims not to have those, stop lying.) This is quite literally insane, but then, my entire life is now. I've met my damn paradox sister– to use a term from Homestuck– and she's attractive and childish, just like me.

What? I know I'm hot. I've had a few girls crush on me, it's... awkward. Really awkward. I don't doubt my sister's experienced the reverse (having a guy crush on her).

"You get to explain that to me, because I have a 3DS to charge."

Somehow I managed to drift off while my sister's coming at me with such a demanding tone. Wow, I am a genuine cloudcuckoolander, but worse: I'm a meta CCL. I fucking joke about it. Or am I invoking it? God, I don't even know, it's a headache. It's like explaining time travel to someone– so clear in my head, so annoying to get into words. English fails it.

"You, too, huh?" Now that I realize, I should've figured she'd have a 3DS as well. I mean, the Shepherds found her first, and I know I have mine... Unless mine were to make me plot-relevant. It's been bugging me for a while; why am _I_ here? There's my damn paradox sister and all her friends– none of whom remember me!– so why am I here? She doesn't even know me.

"Yeah." Her eyes drift to the ground– what, what? What is she bothered about? "I need to play the game again and see what needs to be changed. It's time I stopped shitting reality."

And then everything made sense. That's what's going on, she's on a work binge. I do these weird things where I laze about for most of the school year– I honestly can't think of anything else I apply it to– then, when shit hits the fan and my parents start leaning on me (to put it lightly) to do my work, I do it with amazing speed and quality. I'm a bloody miracle worker under pressure, and it appears my sister is this way as well.

My oddly attractive sister who I never met and I swear it _wouldn't_ be incest if we hooked up. But, as hilarious a ship as that would be, I sort of have a crush on someone else. Who? Well, that's my business.

"Sounds like some terrible things have happened," I say to derail my own train of thought. "What is it you want to do?"

No one needs to know how amazingly attractive and bonerific I find her... that beautiful red hair, those wonderful curves, and yet so much a depreciative personality, as though I could swoop in and be her knight in shining armor. I would kill for that chance.

"Change everything for the better," Shanzira says baldly.

Well, aren't we feeling bold? I puff up proudly. "You want to play the game to see how you can change things? Well, I can do you one better. I've been playing, I know what happens." I've beaten it twice now, and every time I start a new playthrough, things change. Sometimes chapters are added, sometimes they're removed. The future is by no means set in stone, as a fortune teller once told me. Anything can change, as Chrom always says.

Chrom/Robin is the best ship, I was heartbroken to find it sunk. Ah, well, maybe he'll marry Maribelle or Sully; he could use someone rough to snap him out of his funks. It would be weird if he married a dreamer, but then, I suppose Shio would be in good hands. (She's still my best friend, I've always worried about her luck with men. It's not that I'm jealous, I'm more protective. Like an overprotective younger brother.)

"You're a lifesaver," my sister finally sighs. "Thank you, Storm." Now, if only I'd seen the damn repercussions from Emm's death coming– in my first playthrough, we saved her. Ugh. Caused a whole mess of bullshit, too, but it was worth the character deaths.

"For one," I begin thoughtfully, "you want to keep your 3DS handy. It's going to be stolen soon." I believe it happens in an attack from the Dreamterrors– that's what they're called– wherein a few Grimleal snuck in. They meant to kill Chrom, but instead stumbled on my sister's room and found a wondrous device which foretold the future. I found that out in my second playthrough, because Emm died in it.

"Wh–" Aww, she sounds shocked. "Okay. And you're going along with this... becaaauuuse?"

Sis, stop it, please. "It's one of those moods where you're going to fix everything or die trying. I'm supporting you the whole way– you're my damn sister." She's family. Ike might say our blood ties don't matter, but my sister is my sister, and I'm behind her no matter what.

She cracks a grateful smile and hugs me– oh, wow, those are warm droplets. Tears? "Thanks, bro." What a beautiful croak– I mean it, that's not an oxymoron. It's so full of emotion... Damn, she'd make a fine voice actress, just like me. But then, sound's my specialty.

"It's no trouble, sis. But can you stay strong for a while? We're about to bump into some enemies." Listening to Chrom and Robin talking, it's starting to mirror the script from playthrough number two. Now this is going to be an epic fight, tearful and all. Gods, the game did it justice for sure.

... Gods? These guys are rubbing off on me.

"Mustafa and friends?" Aaaand she pulls herself together, the artful feel of her voice gone. Damn, I wish I'd recorded it; it would be perfect for an anime or something.

"Yup." I glance over at the sunken ship I'm still eavesdropping on. "Let's go." I grasp her wrist firmly, then follow along as she takes the lead.

Not lacking for energy in this state, is she?

* * *

"Boss, we got enemy soldiers dead ahead." I come to a full stop beside Chrom, Storm stumbling beside me, but not falling over. I hear him mutter something about his boots before the boss regards me, slowed by grief.

His face is red with tears, not rain. "Fine," he whispers. There's a brief "ahem" as he clears his throat, then bellows, as though little is wrong, "SHEPHERDS! TO ARMS!"

I yank my arm away from Storm and run to find Elincia. Chrom really _is_ broken; Emm's death shattered him. If only I could do it over again... No, no, stop it. To tell him that we planned this would be suicide. We're the biggest idiots ever.

Elincia nickers at me, then snorts. Oh, is the rain bugging you? Sorry girl, but you'll have to suck it up. I swing into her saddle– damn, horses are big– and lift my lance, it having rested in a little slot affixed to the saddlebags. I also pull out a tome– oh, shit, the rain's wetting the pages WAIT THIS IS VELLUM, NOT PAPER. HA! Suck on that. Anyways, I oughta fly ahead and get a look.

And while I'm at it, let's have some music. I kick my heels to Elincia's sides and squeeze with my knees, and just at the time she lifts herself into the air– gods, the rain stings!– I quickly whip out the iPod touch and adjust the sound, careful not to let it get wet. I stuff it back into my pocket, plug in the earbuds, and rock out briefly to Again. Man, Yui's good at this.

Certainly fits the feel, too, but I need something more uplifting. I change the music to place... _that_ one next.

Welp, Mustafa certainly came in force. To do a rough count, there's probably a couple thousand troops. Our force is over twice that size, as Flavia certainly didn't hold back her troops, but it's still enough to make me worry.

And the man himself is also advancing to the front of the line to deliver his ultimatum. Time to yank the reins and get back to Chrom!

Mud slashes everywhere as Elincia touches down. "I got a good look at their number, looks like we're facing a couple thousand troops."

Robin swears loudly at this, Chrom just cracks his knuckles. ... Weird things happen when shit goes south; Robin becomes rude, and Chrom gets violent. I see Storm's already vanished to prepare himself, and Frederick, Flavia, and Basilio show up just a few seconds after Robin's curse finishes echoing.

"Ylisseans!" Whoa, damn, that was Mustafa, he sure can yell. I yoink Elincia around once more to face him– only polite, and with music in my ears I sort of need this. Wait, why am I listening to music while he's talking? I pause the iPod with its little remote. "I offer you mercy! Surrender to me now and live!"

"Surrender?" Asks Basilio, entirely polite. "Sorry, I'm not familiar with the word."

That would have been funny in another circumstance.

I see Mustafa hunch over, ever so slightly, in a sigh. "Emmeryn would not have wished–"

_"DON'T SPEAK HER NAME!"_ Chrom bellows, nearly jolting me out of the saddle. Holy shit, he's loud! Louder than Mustafa! Louder than me! He'd be a better herald than anyone here! Or is it just him being so pissed that he has no trouble screaming like that? I don't even know. Probably.

"Your rage is justified, Prince Chrom," the general replies. He's amazingly patient. "But the meaning of your sister's final sacrifice was not lost on me. I suspect many Plegians who heard her final words would say the same. If you lay down your weapons, I vow to protect you as best I can."

I trot Elincia forward with a sigh, and project. As much as I hate being nosy, I can no longer afford to sit by the sidelines. "My deepest apologies, sir, but we cannot go with you. You stand in our way. The choice is yours, sir– either move or be destroyed. You can see the state we're all in."

Someone here needs a diplomat, and I'm fit for it.

"I would, if the king would allow it."

I try not to raise an eyebrow. "What Gangrel doesn't know won't hurt you." Secrecy isn't hard.

"I am sorry, young woman. I cannot risk the lives of my family for this." Well, that I can sympathize with; if anything happened to my family, I'd be screwed. But then, I still depend on them, slightly.

"Then you forfeit your life," I warn with closed eyes, "and those of your soldiers. Give the families of those we kill our deepest apologies." The reins clink as I lift them up to turn Elincia around, and she moves somberly back to Chrom's side, then turns around yet again.

"So be it," he sighs. "Prince Chrom, I shall endeavor to grant you a swift and merciful end."

"Shanz," Chrom immediately starts–

"Your orders, sir?" I face him with the snap and pop of a dress-center-dress.

He blinks at my sudden change in demeanor. "Get Robin," he mumbles. "Now."

I nod. "Yes, sir!" FWUMP! Water flies everywhere, mud drips from Elincia's hooves, then SPLASH! More muddy water flying everywhere. "Chrom wants to talk to you, Robin." Yoink! Protest all you like, Robin, this is the quick way. Elincia taking you for a ride might suck in the rain, but you get used to it. This is what the bigass coats are for!

More water splashes as Elincia lands. I think she's getting used to these hops. "I've brought her, sir. Shall I take my leave?"

Robin stares at me for a brief moment while Chrom speaks. "No, I want you to stay for this." Really? All right. "Robin, if... if we take out their commander–"

She looks back to him and nods. "Yes, I was thinking along the same lines before Shanzira grabbed me. If we take him out, the rest will probably lay down their weapons."

Save us a whole bunch of casualties, too.

"All right," Chrom says with a nod. "Shanzira, I'd like to to stay by me and carve a path to him."

Pardon? "I could just fly you over, sir."

"They do have archers, Shanzira," Robin warns.

"Very well." Even though I could totally fly him over, because I can dodge arrows, he's choosing to slaughter swaths of Plegians instead. Well... All right. The excuse works. "Sir, I shall do my best to protect you. On your command."

Chrom draws the Falchion and points it to the Plegians. "CHARGE!"

I raise one hand, hit the pause/play button on my iPod, and listen as Again ends and another song plays, one more appropriate, handpicked for this. One moment while I set it to repeat one.

I'm set.

_"YOU, YOU SAY, YOU HAVE LOST THE WAY!_

_GOT NO NAME, JUST LIVING FOR TODAY!_

_LOOK UP TO THE SKY ABOVE_

_AND SEE THE MORNING SKY AGAIN!_

_YOU'VE GOT SO MUCH POWER INSIDE_

_SO CRY IT OUT, MY FRIEND!"_

We meet the enemy as the chorus begins. It's a short song, and the chorus is two words repeated several times, one that is quite appropriate for me to belt: I'm alive!

There's only a brief clash of weapons; Chrom is literally mowing these guys down. I open Arcthunder up, whisper a few words while the chorus is still going, and send a crackling blast at the next group going after us. They're flung to the ground by its force, and they don't get up, and stray sparks dance off them, flinging pure white light about. Chrom takes his opportunity to advance.

Well, shit, I'm going to have to speed up my attacks. Very well.

_"THERE'S NO USE IN HANGING ALL AROUND–_

_YOU'RE A KING, CAN'T YOU SEE YOUR CROWN?_

_LOOK INTO MY EYES;_

_SO MANY THING ARE WAITING TO BE DONE!_

_YOU JUST NEED A FRIEND;_

_TOGETHER, WE WILL SING ALONG!"_

This song is amazingly appropriate. Come on, Princey, we're gonna slaughter 'em. ... Wrong sentiment, because he's fighting like a monster, not a human. The color of his eyes right now are of a blue flame, flickering with wild rage. As for his swings, he's sacrificing some accuracy for power, handling the sword as though he were a butcher. He's cutting through lances and easily knocking aside other weapons, and not even twitching when arrows graze his skin.

Okay, maybe a few parts aren't so appropriate, the point of singing it is to wake him the hell up. He's a king, can't he see his crown? So many things are waiting to be done, responsibilities passed to him by his sister.

Even so, I have to lurk behind him, clearing the road for him. Being in his path right now is a baaaaad idea.

_"LOOK INTO MY EYES;_

_SO MANY THINGS ARE WAITING TO BE DONE!_

_YOU JUST NEED A FRIEND;_

_TOGETHER, WE WILL SING ALONG!"_

One soldier proves to be annoying for Chrom; instead of helping him– right now he's too pissed, he's fighting for pride, not life– I kill a sneaky-looking guy who was edging away. A wee thief, and he's got a few shiny goods. I'm gonna hand these to Robin to sell. After this, I return back to Chrom, kill a few guys who were going to backstab him, then just finish off the guy he was dueling.

Was taking way too long, and the guy's got to realize he needs the help of his friends.

The song comes to its end– damn, it's too short. Way too short. It's such a blast to sing, too. Something else suitably metal plays, just some stuff from Blazblue. I overhear a piano playing almost frantically, and glance over to see Storm, tag-teaming with Cordelia, entirely red in the face.

I'm going to eat one of my hats if they _don't_ get together. I pause the music and listen– oh holy shit, the guy's blasting Don't Speak Her Name. Wow. Really? I like my music better. I also see Nin connect the raindrops with elthunder and zap several soldiers at once.

Wow, we're roasting them with this weather.

"Prince Chrom."

Oh, the enemy general. I turn Elincia around hard– I'll have to apologize for that later– and rejoin Chrom's side. When Chrom's silent, I look to Mustafa and reply in his stead. "I wouldn't try talking to him. I've never seen anyone so terrifyingly angry."

"Yet you stay by his side." Looking at him, he has a pose of power– his axe dug into the ground in front of him, his fingers on the haft at his chest. Wow, he's tall.

I raise up my head and puff my chest. "That's my job, he's my boss. Sticking to someone even when he's at his worst is what it means to be loyal."

"Shanz..." That was Chrom, I doubt Mustafa knows my name.

"Boss," I warn, not shifting my eyes from Mustafa, "not to give orders to my superiors, but I think we'd best get on with it."

Chrom says nothing and does nothing to acknowledge me, save for raising his sword and charging him. Mustafa's answer is to raise his axe from the ground and angle it so Falchion bounces off the haft; I, meanwhile, unhook my boots from Elincia's stirrups so I can help out. What? If I bolt him from there, I might hit Chrom. Shit isn't simple like actual Fire Emblem fighting.

Chrom's been grazed twice while Mustafa's unscathed by the time I join in. It looks like Chrom's temper is starting to weaken him, while Mustafa is calm and disciplined. Better collect myself briefly... AND STAB. Stab, stab, stab, stab! Stab stab stab stab swipe sweep! Step step buttspike dodge step step stab, OW! Buttspike, stab, sweep sweep spin boink boink boink.

Those last three attempts were trying to slam the butt-spike into his face. OUCH! FUCK! AXE TO THE LEG! I gotta step back, boss, hopefully I wore him out– OH GODS. Chrom just took a hit to the chest. Okay, fine, this thing ain't balanced like a javelin, and it's a fucking _lance_, but I'm trying this anyways.

I throw the lance at Mustafa while he's distracted with Chrom, and by some fucking miracle, skewer him through the chest.

... That worked? That move was just as pathetic as throwing one's sword at the last minute.

"Please," Mustafa gasps. "Spare my men... you have won."

Meanwhile, I splash water everywhere and squat next to Chrom. "Boss?"

"I'm fine," he growls. "It's shallow. It just hurts."

It still hurts.

I hand him a vulnerary. "Down this. Won't fix you all the way, but it's all I got. Shall I give the order, sir?"

He takes it from me and nods. "Please." He throws his head back to swig, and I mount Elincia for a vantage. "SHEPHERDS! CEASE FIGHTING IMMEDIATELY! PLEGIANS, YOUR GENERAL HAS FALLEN AND BADE US SPARE YOUR LIVES! WE ARE WILLING TO DO SO IF YOU SURRENDER! LOWER YOUR WEAPONS!"

"Thank you," I hear Chrom croak.

Huffing, "no problem." There are splashes approaching; a glance reveals them to be Robin's. She comes to a stop by Chrom and pants for breath– wow, she really strained herself. She murmurs something I can't hear, maybe "you did it". No matter, where the hell is– "BASILIO! WHERE THE HELL'S OUR RIDE?"

"RIGHT THERE!" He bellows back, running across the mud with little difficulty. I twist around yet a-fucking-gain– my gods, this is a lot of twisting and turning I'm doing today– to see a friendly pink-themed dancer, a whole caravan behind her.

Olivia calls to us, tip-toeing forward ever so elegantly. "Khan Basilio!" Hot damn, small wonder an Olivia-mothered Lucina is badass; that speed and grace is insane.

Without even having to pant for breath, Basilio approaches her to talk. "Sorry we kept you waiting." Okay, he just took a level in badass if his stamina is that amazing.

Her shoulders raise up and hunch in her usual pose. "When I didn't hear from you, I thought..." And she interrupts herself with a shudder.

Basilio pats one of her abnormally high shoulders and addresses us. "Chrom, Robin, meet Olivia. She'll be smuggling us out of here."

"You mean the low-profile kind of smuggling?" I need to know this, it determines whether I'm belting out music on the way.

Olivia nods, crushing my morale-raising hopes. "Y-yes... but we have to hurry! Doubtless more of the Mad King's men are on their way."

Yup, sounds about right. I stand in the stirrups– that is not comfortable at all– and bellow to the Shepherds: "EVERYONE, INTO THE CARRIAGES! IT'S TIME TO GET OUTTA HERE!"

I sit out here in the rain and wet while everyone else "piles in", as Basilio says. I'm watching everyone– wet from both rain and sweat– herd by me and clamber into carriages until one by one, they fill up.

I'm not worried about room for myself, although I probably should change my clothes before I catch a cold. We don't get that luxury out here in war. It's hell, as every experienced soldier rightfully says. So I just watch everyone clamber into comfort until Robin calls to me.

"Shanzira, get in here or you'll get sick."

I hand Elincia's reins off to the guy driving the carriage and hop in, next to a few good friends– A somber Robin, humming Storm, exhausted Shio, panting Sully, and of course, and disturbingly quiet Chrom. I'm pretty sure there are others, but that's all I can see right now.

* * *

**To all those who bitch about the song: You're supposed to listen to it while reading. Besides, it helps me add structure to a fight scene. Call it a crutch, but it's still fun for me to add in.**

**And while I remember to say this: GO VOTE IN THE POLL ON MY PROFILE PAGE! It determines what the 100 follower reward is. I seriously doubt Tales of Future Past will win if ALL of you guys vote. GO GO GO! I will delay 28 if I must. VOTE!**


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